Rebellious: A Best Friends-To-Lovers Romance

by Kristy Marie

  At first, I didn’t mind his rules. They gave me Bennett and honestly, the rules kept our relationship interesting. But now, I’d like for him to take those rules and shove them up his ass.

  “The rules protect our fathers,” he defends. “Come on, Asp. You know I love you.”

  I feel like a scolded child and not a high school senior. “This doesn’t feel like love, Bennett. This feels like anguish.”

  He squats back down. “Aspen,” he whispers, brushing a hair from my face. “Don’t you think this kills me too? Don’t you think I wake up every day, hoping my father has a breakthrough with his therapist? That maybe, just for once, we could live normal lives and be actual neighbors?”

  I sniffle, wiping under my eyes. “We’re never going to be normal.”

  He bows his head. “No, we won’t, but that doesn’t mean I will ever stop loving you. No matter where you go, Aspen Von Bremen, I will always be there for you. You’re my girl.”

  His girl… the one he can’t have.

  “But I’m leaving,” I argue. “How can you be there for me when I’m miles away?”

  He leans in, threading his hands through my hair. “No matter where you go, I’ll always follow you.”

  I startle awake, the sky dark outside the window. After a round of gentle sex, I fell asleep in Bennett’s arms. I hadn’t thought of that night in years.

  Bennett kept his promise to me even then, following me to the same college, even though it didn’t have the best football program. He’s always sacrificing for others.

  Sure, the rules suck a major butthole, but they kept us together.

  And that was fine with me. I learned my way around them, creating exception after exception. Bennett and I made many memories with those damn rules in play. Memories I wouldn’t trade for anything. All his highs… all my lows… all our firsts… There’s something to say about that kind of connection with someone.

  But what kind of friend would I be if I allowed him to, yet again, make another exception for me? Would I really be giving him the opportunity to grow? To be the NFL quarterback I know he’s destined to be? Or will our relationship confine him to a life of mediocrity where his tallest football trophy will be from a high school coaching position?

  And we’ll sacrifice all this for what? Playing grown up BFFs.

  Maybe we could move away. Moving to Boston would give him the distance he needs from our parents. Maybe then he would give up his rules for good.

  What happens when we go home for the holidays, though?

  “Hey,” his gravelly voice pulls me from my panic. “You okay?”

  I ease back into the sheets, curling up around him. “Yeah, it was just a dream.”

  A dream that told me it was time I looked after Bennett—and make the decision he won’t.

  Where you go, I go

  Bennett

  “Bennett? Are you okay?”

  Aspen might look small but when she’s asleep and draped over me, it feels like you’re moving a Kia off your chest.

  “Yeah,” I whisper into the phone, answering Mom’s question as carefully as I can without waking Aspen. “I’m just getting up.” Tucking a pillow in place of my body, I cover Aspen with the blanket and slip out of the bedroom quietly.

  “It’s noon,” my mother notes. “Guess you’ve been taking advantage of the summer.” Yep. Especially the past two weeks where I’ve done nothing but worship Aspen’s body.

  “Yeah,” I chuckle, padding to the kitchen where I find it empty. “I’ve been a little lax with early morning runs.”

  Filling the coffeepot with water, I put the phone on speaker. “Yeah.”

  I can hear the smile in Mom’s voice. “Good. I’m glad you’re taking the time to just enjoy.” I can hear the smile in Mom’s voice. “So, I just wanted to check on everyone since I haven’t heard from any of you.”

  I frown. “I’m sorry,” I admit. “We should have called.”

  Mom scoffs, a hint of laughter in her voice. “Bennett, I didn’t expect you to carve out time to call your mama, I just…”

  I know that soft, concerned tone. “What’s the matter? Is Dad okay?”

  “Oh yeah,” she says, nearly cutting me off. “Well…”

  “Mom.” My tone brooks no bullshit.

  “Your father is fine,” she says hesitantly. “At least Theo says he’s okay.”

  My entire body locks up tight, every muscle coiling in tension. “What happened?” I’m already looking for my keys.

  “Your grandfather fell trying to clean the gutters,” she says.

  “Wait, Grandpa? Not Dad?”

  I can hear footsteps, meaning my mother is more than likely pacing across the hardwood floors. “Well, your father was upset, seeing as we weren’t sure if it was a stroke or what condition he was in.” She inhales. “I was at the store, but Theo was here and picked up Cade and they drove to Jekyll to check on him yesterday.”

  Not that I don’t love my grandfather, but knowing it wasn’t my father, relaxes me. “Is he okay?” I ask, pouring water into the coffee maker.

  “Dislocated his shoulder but apart from some bumps and bruises, he’s going to be fine. Your father and Theo stayed to fix a few things before heading back.”

  Grandma and Grandpa are the only grandparents I have. They adopted my dad when he was young. Uncle Theo acts like he’s their child too, so it doesn’t shock me they both went to check on him. “Good,” I tell Mom. “I’m sure they got him situated.”

  Mom hums her agreement. “Bennett…”

  She sighs and my stomach tightens. Grandpa wasn’t the real reason she called.

  “Yeah?” I try to sound nonchalant.

  “I received a call today.”

  Oh no.

  “Bennett, son.” Her voice is pained. “Did you accept an offer to another school?”

  Fuck.

  I rake my hands through my hair. There are two weeks left in the summer before Aspen will board a plane to Boston. I had to do something. The past six weeks haven’t been long enough. No amount of time with Aspen will be long enough. I might not know what the fuck I plan on doing about it past this moment right here, but I know I can’t let her get on that plane without me.

  Clearing my throat, I confirm. “I did.”

  There’s nothing left but the truth.

  “Bennett,” she almost cries. “Your whole football career will be delayed a year.”

  I nod, though she can’t see it, my gaze focused on the water outside the wall of windows. “I understand the consequences.” My tone is flat.

  “You won’t graduate on time,” she adds as a plea.

  “I know, Mama.” I do, and it changes nothing. “I can’t live without her.”

  It’s as simple as that.

  “But—”

  I cut her off. “I thought you were the one who told me connections like mine and Aspen’s are rare.” Honestly, I thought if anyone was on my side, it’d be her.

  “I did, but Bennett—” She groans. “Have you talked to Aspen about this?”

  I feel my back straighten. “No.”

  “Do you think she would like you losing a year of football to follow her to Boston?”

  Rolling the tension from my shoulders, I sigh. “Mom, I don’t really care what she thinks. Where she goes, I’m going.” My argument is final. “I’ve given it a lot of thought over the summer. I’ll use the year off to hone my skills and bulk up. By the time I can play again, I’ll be better than I was this year.”

  Hopefully.

  “And what happens with you and Aspen?”

  I shake my head. “What do you mean? We’ll be together like we always have been.”

  Frustrated, my mom exhales into the phone. “Bennett,” she says in a tone she uses when I’ve disappointed her. “Aspen is twenty-three.”

  “Yeah, so?” And I’m twenty-one. It’s not like we’re kids.

  “Twenty-three-year-olds are usually looking to marry and settle down, possibly ha
ve kids soon.”

  My chest clenches. “Aspen doesn’t want to marry and have kids.” I scoff.

  My mom hesitates. “Maybe not now, Bennett, but she will.”

  The thought of someone marrying Aspen or having a baby with her sends a shot of fury within me. “What are you saying?”

  Lowering her voice, my mother replies, “You’re either making a commitment or you’re only standing in her way, baby. You two can’t be just friends or roommates for the rest of your lives. Relationships don’t work that way.”

  I open my mouth and then close it. What am I supposed to say to that? Is that really how Aspen feels? Is she looking for a husband?

  “We have time,” I say, but it’s like I’m trying to convince myself.

  I can tell my mom is treading lightly. “You do, but what I need you to understand is, eventually, you both need to create a future. You’re giving up your future to be with Aspen. And for what? To be her friend for a few more years?”

  I’m quick to respond. “If I have to.”

  “And if she meets someone in Boston? Are you going to step aside?”

  I swallow.

  “Are you going to have a life in Boston without her? In three or four years, will you look back on this decision and think it was worth it?”

  “You don’t understand.” I’ve gone from firm in my conviction to defending my actions.

  My mother chuckles. “If anyone understands leaving everything for the one you love, it’s me, Bennett. The difference, though, is I knew the future I wanted.”

  And I don’t. Mine and Aspen’s future is still very much fucked.

  “If you won’t give her children or claim her as anything other than the one you love, then you should reconsider what kind of life you’d have together.”

  I almost argue that it doesn’t matter. We’d be together.

  “You deserve more than this, Bennett.”

  I scoff.

  “You do, but you won’t let yourself have it.”

  I feel my eyes narrowing, anger clouding my patience. “You know why we can’t. Why would you even suggest otherwise?”

  Surely my mother, of all people, would understand why I can’t go after Aspen.

  “Because you love her.”

  I can’t do this anymore.

  “I need to go,” I say, cutting off any further talks about the future.

  The woman who has been my biggest supporter sniffles. “Love isn’t easy, but it always requires a sacrifice. The question is, how much longer can you bleed before you have nothing left to offer.”

  “I gotta go.” My voice trembles. Whether it be from anger or frustration, I don’t know.

  “I love you,” she whispers.

  I sigh; this morning is going to utter hell. “I love you too.”

  Hanging up, I slam the phone on the counter.

  “Was that your mom?”

  Aspen’s voice startles me. “Uh, yeah. She was making sure we didn’t burn the house down.” I try to hide the lie with a smile.

  “Ha! Did you tell her we hid the matches when we got here?”

  I shake my head. “Coffee?”

  “Yes, please.” She hops up on the counter, her bare legs tan against my white shirt.

  I pour her a cup and dump a mountain of cream and sugar in before handing it over.

  She takes the cup, blowing over the top. “You gonna tell me why you’re in a shitty mood, or should I guess?”

  “I’m not in a bad mood,” I lie easily.

  Aspen’s brows arch as she takes a sip of the fiery liquid. “See, if I didn’t know every facet of your moods, that lie would have worked.” She holds her palm out for me to high-five. “That lie was nicely done, sir.”

  I grunt out a laugh and swat her hand away. “It’s not a lie. I’m fine.” And, apparently, making lying a habit.

  “Oh, Bennett, Bennett, Bennett,” she chides me. “Don’t play this shit with me. I always get it out of you, eventually.”

  I sigh. She’s right; she will get the truth eventually, but it could be years. However, my mother’s words still burn in the back of my throat. How does Aspen feel about me going with her?

  “Fine,” I say, taking a sip of my coffee. “My mother called with some concerns.”

  She cocks her head to the side. “Concerns like?”

  Here goes nothing. “Concerns like me accepting a transfer to Kensington University.” I don’t need to tell her where the college is. She knows it’s in Boston.

  “Oh,” she doesn’t seem shocked. “I didn’t realize you were serious about transferring.”

  I tip my chin. “I think we both can agree this summer changed some things.”

  She nods. “It did… and it didn’t.”

  My eyes narrow. “How are things the same?”

  She sighs, her body slumping in defeat. “Do you love me, Bennett?”

  “Of course,” I respond with no hesitation.

  She smiles, but it seems pained. “And I you,” she whispers. “That’s why I’m going to Boston, and you’re not coming with me.”

  As if she hit me, I rear back. “What?”

  She looks down into her cup like it holds the answers. “I don’t want you to come with me.”

  I don’t understand. “Why?”

  She sighs, her gaze lifting to mine. “Your mom is right.”

  “I don’t care,” I clip, my voice taking on a hard edge. “You aren’t living in an unfamiliar state all alone.”

  “And you aren’t giving up your football career,” she clips back, her tone now matching mine.

  “I’m not giving it up. I’m delaying it, which you didn’t seem all that bothered by at the start of the summer.”

  I don’t mean to be an asshole, but I feel like everything is getting out of hand. “I thought you hadn’t decided between going to Boston or working with Thad?”

  “I’m going to Boston,” she confirms.

  “Since when?”

  She shrugs. “Does it matter?”

  I slam my hand on the counter, startling her. “Yes, it fucking matters. Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I wasn’t sure until a couple of weeks ago.”

  I scoff. “And so you thought to keep it from me as a surprise?” I don’t know why I’m even mad she didn’t tell me. Maybe it’s because I planned. I was prepared for her decision, either way. “I hadn’t confirmed because I thought you would let me know your choice.” I toss my coffee cup in the sink and watch it shatter. “We had a plan!”

  “We did!” She jumps down. “But those plans changed.”

  My jaw goes tight as I grind down on my molars. “No.”

  She gets in my face. “Yes,” she argues.

  I can’t deal with this anymore. Hauling her to my chest with one hand, I tilt her chin with the other. “I’m going with you. This isn’t up to you.”

  Fuck all the arguments. “I love you.”

  Her cheek twitches and her eyes well with unshed tears. “I love you more,” she says, a quiver in her voice as she strokes my jaw, smoothing the tension with her thumb.

  It’s then I realize our lives will never be simple. I’ll never have her the way I want, but with every rule, comes an exception. Aspen and I will find that exception. We can be together. If she wants children, surely we can find a way. They might not be mine, but I can give her just about everything she wants. If she’s just willing to continue living unorthodoxly, we can make it work. I swear it.

  “Let’s go back to bed,” she whispers. I’d do anything to end this conversation and making love to Aspen is no hardship. Scooping her up, I carry her to the bedroom and lay her down, her hips cradling mine, while I strip my shirt from her body.

  “Kiss me,” she begs, cupping my cheeks.

  “Always.”

  “Bennett!”

  I spring up in bed. “What?” I bark at Fenn, who barged into the bedroom like he’s lost his fucking mind.

  “Where’s my fucking sister going with yo
ur brother?”

  It takes a minute to register that I must have fallen back to sleep. “What?” I look to Aspen’s side of the bed, empty. “She’s with Drew?”

  Fenn rolls his eyes as if breathing the same air as me, is stupid. “Yes, and they took your car, dumbass.”

  My car? “When?”

  “About ten minutes ago. I passed them coming home.”

  He wasn’t home? It doesn’t matter.

  “I’m sure they went for groceries,” I rationalize. She would never leave and not tell me.

  Fenn nods, but it’s smug. “I’m sure that’s why they took her suitcase.” He tips his chin to her bedroom. “Rolling bags have to be easier on your back than totes.”

  Unease blooms in my chest. “She took everything?”

  Fenn nods, seeming to understand I didn’t know.

  “Toss me your keys.” I tell him, already getting out of bed. “And get out.” I need to find clothes.

  “Psh.” Fenn scoffs. “I’ll wait in the car. Hurry the fuck up.”

  It took me a minute to throw on clothes and meet Fenn in the car. I probably could have done it faster had my mind not been racing with questions. What’s worse was, I knew the answers to those questions.

  Aspen wasn’t planning to say goodbye. Going back to bed, her loving me for hours until I passed out was her goodbye. It was also her escape plan. She knew I wouldn’t let her go without a fight, so she took the fight away from me.

  Except, she didn’t factor in her brother’s skills in hugging curves and doubling the speed limit. “Don’t kill us before we get to her,” I clip dryly.

  Fenn’s fingers clench the wheel. “You just stay over there and brood. I’ll get us there in time to shout our proper goodbyes.”

  His words only confirm my fears. She’s really leaving. “She wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye to your mom and dad.” I hope.

  Fenn cuts me a sharp look. “You’re a fucking idiot.”

  Right now, it takes all I have not to punch him in the face. I’ve had about all I can take from the Von Bremens right now. “I don’t need your shit,” I snip.

  “And I don’t need your whiny, ‘Oh no she didn’t’.” His voice pitches so it sounds girly. “Newsflash, Jameson, my sister has always put you first. If she thought she would upset your delicate feelings, she would up and do what’s necessary to protect you, the rest of us be damned.”