12 Days of Forever
Page 8
Yesterday, last night, whatever you want to call it, wasn’t supposed to happen. After talking to JD and realizing that Yvie and I are on two different paths in life, I knew I had to shut down. But when she pulled up, I had my front door open before she could even knock. My mind was made up; I was going to take everything that she was willing to give and not let go, until now.
Leaving her in the airport, watching her disappear out of sight is the worst feeling I’ve ever experienced. The rock I seem to have swallowed is pushing against my heart, lungs and stomach. I can’t get comfortable whether I sit up, stand or clear my throat to dislodge the solid mass that has taken residency there. The pressure increases with each movement.
The warm air becomes stifling and my chest aches, a feeling that I despise. I’ve kept myself free from entanglements, only dating here and there and never anything too serious. I’ve waited for that one special person to walk into my life, and now that she has, she’s walked right back out. I don’t think I knew she was the one until this moment and now that I know, I’m not sure what I can do to show her how I feel. She needs to know that us being together while she was here wasn’t just about sex for me. Thing is, it may have been that way for her. If so, I can handle it. She doesn’t need to know how I feel. Guys are best at compartmentalizing their feelings anyway.
I roll down my window and take a gulp of air. I don’t know why I’m stalling. I don’t know why I’m still parked and not driving back home or to the gym. It’s not like she’s going to come running out and fall into my arms. She’s heading back to New York where she lives and works. I have to accept that. I have to find a way to be her friend and stay present in her life. I refuse to go away unless she asks me to. If I have to resort to making her smile via video chat, then so be it. I’ll be the best damn video chatter ever.
Slipping my car into reverse, I pull out of the parking spot and into drive. I tell myself that seeing her via a computer is better than nothing, and I’m not going to wait for her to call me. I’m going to take the initiative so she knows I’m interested. My phone beeps, and I glance at the screen. I stop in the middle of the lane and stare at Yvie’s name on my screen. My fingers twitch as I slide my thumb over her name and her message appears.
Tiny Dancer: Do you have plans for New Year’s Eve?
I put my car in park and read her text message again. My automatic response is to say ‘you’, but we won’t be together so I tell her exactly what I hope to be doing.
I’d love to spend it with you, but since we won’t be together seeing you through my phone or computer will have to do.
I hit send before I can erase the cheese oozing out of my message. I really need to be more manly and less of a sissy. I set down my phone and try to resist checking it constantly to see if she’ll text back right away. I could park and just text her until she has to turn off her phone, or I can leave.
My decision is made for me when my phone beeps, and her name shows on my screen again
Tiny Dancer: I’m not going back until after NYE. Can you come get me???
My eyes bug out of my head when I read her message. I read it again just to make sure I comprehend everything clearly. I throw my car into reverse and drive as fast as I can back to the spot I just vacated. Backing in, my door is open before I even put my car in park. My heart is racing with anticipation and dread. What if she’s only asking me to get her because I just dropped her off? Realistically, I’m the closest and her brother is still celebrating Christmas and has probably had a few too many to drink. Katelyn could come get her, but maybe Yvie wants me to pick her up.
I speed walk back toward the terminal, trying not to look eager. I didn’t respond to her message, and I don’t want her to think I’m ignoring her. Yvie stands on the curb chatting with the attendant, and a pang of jealousy courses through me when he brushes something off her jacket. My walk turns to a slow here-I-come jog.
“Yvie,” I yell out, not only to get her attention, but to get that of the attendant who should be checking people in curbside.
She sidesteps the man and smiles. I slow down and take in the moment. I’m going to spend New Year’s Eve with the beauty that is only a few feet away from me. This may be a cause for a resolution even though I don’t believe in them.
When I reach her, I cup her face and pull her to my lips. We may have only parted a half hour ago, but this guy standing here doesn’t know that. And if Yvie told him by chance, then he knows I’m marking my territory, even if it’s temporary.
“Are you ready?” I ask as my hands slide from her cheek and one moves over her shoulder and down her arm until my fingers are nestled in between hers. She nods, and I reach around her to grab the handle to her suitcase.
“What happened?” I’m not trying to burst my little bubble of happiness right now, but I’m curious. She’s never failed to remind me that she was leaving tonight.
Yvie stops us in our tracks, her hand remaining in mine. I give her fingers a light squeeze.
“I got a text from a friend, and it wasn’t the best news. It made me do a lot of thinking, and I figured I’d rather spend the rest of my year here.” She shrugs as if it’s no big deal that she didn’t get on her flight to NYC.
“A lot of thinking in…” I look at my watch and smirk. “Thirty minutes or so?”
She steps forward, bridging the gap between us. “Sometimes all it takes is a few words for someone to realize that they’re not ready to leave.”
I lean forward and kiss her forehead. “Well, whatever you found out, I’m happy you decided to stay here. Let’s get you home.”
I start to walk, but she pulls me back. I look at her questioningly. “I was thinking I could stay with you tonight?”
She doesn’t have to ask me twice. I nod quickly and pull her just a bit harder to get her moving. I’ve never been so excited to get home until now.
I’m naked and warm. I’m cocooned in the arms of a man that I just met and who makes me feel beautiful and desired, who makes me feel cherished and extremely sexy. The moment I read Lindsay’s text, my mind was made up to stay. I had thought about it all day yesterday. I didn’t want to leave my family so quickly, and when Peyton thanked me for her necklace my heart broke at the knowledge that I couldn’t spend more time with her. My opportunity to get to know her better was flashing like a beacon and there wasn’t anything I could do about it.
I never thought Oliver would do that – replace me with my understudy – because I took some personal time during our hiatus. This is his way of showing me who’s the boss, and I’m fine with that. I can go back to work with my head held high and throw the biggest diva bullshit move he’s ever seen. If he thinks, for one moment, that I’m going to sit by and let some two-bit slut take away my lead, he’s got another thing coming. If he has issues with my form, he must be training her hard to fix hers. There’s a reason she’s an understudy. Unless, of course, the only form he’s concerned with is the one she’s mastering while on her knees.
“You’re hurting my hand and thinking far too hard for this early in the morning,” Xander mumbles into this crook of my neck. I’ve never been a cuddler, but being in his arms like this makes me never want to leave. He has a king-size bed, and we’re smack dab in the middle. No his side, no her side. Not that I have a side, but being in his arms makes me feel like I could.
I hadn’t realized I was squeezing his hand until he said something. I ease up on my grip and try to move closer to him. There’s little space, if any, and my movements cause him to groan. I stifle a laugh and don’t say anything. With my back against his chest, I wiggle again and his hand clamps down on my hip.
“You’re going to be the death of me.” He nuzzles deeper into my neck and places his lips against my shoulder.
“Oh, well we can’t have that.” I start to pull away, only to be pulled back against this chest as he continues peppering my neck and shoulder with kisses. His scruff brushes against my skin, causing goosebumps. My hand reaches dow
Xander pulls my hand, leaving me with me no choice but to let go of him. He moves us slightly, locking our conjoined hands down onto the bed and pushes my leg up with his, giving him the perfect angle to take me. His cock brushes against me, and I hiss. I’m sensitive after last night and early this morning. Xander has a healthy appetite for sex, not that I’m complaining.
He pulls back and sits up on his elbow. “Are you sore?” he asks as he takes his hand away from mine and trails his fingers over my exposed breast. My skin pebbles, and my nipples peak. Xander doesn’t wait for an answer as he licks my nipple, pulling the bud with his teeth. His hips thrust as he rubs his hard on along my pussy.
“Answer me, Yvie. If you’re sore, I’ll stop.”
“Don’t stop,” I beg as Xander eases into me slowly. I’m sore, but this is worth the ache. His hips move into mine as his mouth dances over my breast. This position is new for me and even though I can feel him deep, I don’t like that I can’t touch him freely. I slide my hand under his arm and let my nails dig into his skin. This encourages him to move faster, and he does.
Xander pushes my shoulder and buries me into his bed, his chest heavy on my back until he sits back on his knees. His hands grip my hips, pulling them back to meet his thrust.
“Oh, God,” I pant out barely able to catch my breath. The sounds of heavy breathing, moaning and our skin slapping against each other turns me on. I move against him, creating more friction. His hands cup my breasts and his fingers pull on my nipples. I scream out in pleasure. With my breasts in his hand, he uses them as leverage to sit me up. My legs slide in between his and his hands guide me up and down. Xander presses his forehead to my back, allowing me to work against him.
When his finger touches my clit I’m done for. “Oh fuck,” he says against my skin. “I can feel you squeezing my dick.” His words and his touch are what I need to push me over the edge. I rock against him faster, more eager, forgetting that I’m sore as he rubs my clit.
“I’m…”
“I know, baby,” he says as he pushes me back down onto my hands and pumps in and out of me feverishly. Xander slams into me, screaming out as his cock pulses. His hips slow, but he still moves in me, making sure I’m fully sated.
I collapse in a heap, and he quickly follows alongside me. We’re both on our stomachs, looking at each other. I want to ask him what he’s thinking, but now is not the time. He’s likely, just like I am, going to say something stupid and ruin the moment. I know mine would be to tell him that he’s the best lover I’ve ever had, and I can’t get the sensation of the way his muscles move under my fingertips to leave my memory. I’ve tried, but to no avail.
“I need to shower,” he says, breaking the tension in the room. “I have to open the gym today. Care to join me?”
“At the gym?” I ask, sitting up on my elbows. The last time I was in his gym for a workout, but I got one that I wasn’t expecting.
“Both,” he tells me as he kisses my nose then mouth. “Come to work with me after we shower. There’s a room I use for storage that has mirrors in it. We could clean it out, and you can practice.”
I look at him questioningly. “Why didn’t you tell me about this room before?”
Xander shrugs. “Watching you work out the other night was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. No way in hell was I going to pass that up.”
I move to slap him on the chest, but he grabs my wrist and pulls me into a searing kiss. He bites at my lower lip when he pulls away. “Come shower with me. Help me live out yet another fantasy.”
I laugh and watch his very fine-toned ass walk away from me. I get up and shuffle down the hall. He’s already in the shower with the water running when I enter the bathroom. “How many fantasies do you have?” I ask as I step in alongside him. He moves aside so that the hot water can wash over me.
“Hmm, let’s see,” he says as he lathers a bar of soap between his hands. I can’t help but think about how smooth his hands are going to be when he touches me. “There was the gym. Ever since I bought it, I’ve had that fantasy but would’ve never done anything about it… until you came along. What we just did, having you sit up against me like that, that was definitely one.” Xander’s hands start roaming. The softness of the soap and the roughness of his hands creates the most divine friction against my skin. My head falls back when he kisses my pelvic bone. I think about hitching my leg over his shoulder and grabbing the shower door to hang on, but I don’t want to come off as eager. He turns me around, and I miss my opportunity. “My other would be to have you in my shower, but I know you’re sore so maybe next time.” He bites my butt cheek and stands, ending the fun little game he was playing.
I turn around and look at him, he’s hard again and stroking himself. He doesn’t care that I’m watching, or that he’s doing it in front of me. I bite my lip and sink down to my knees. My hands cup his ass, and my fingers dig into his skin. His hand drops and my mouth takes over where his hand left off.
“Yeah, this is definitely a fantasy.”
I stand in the doorway and watch Yvie go through her dance routine. Today, she’s looking more like a ballerina than she did the other night. Her hair is up in a bun, just like the many pictures of her at Harrison’s house. She wears a black leotard, a piece of clothing that I am now very fond of. Yvie moves with such grace and poise, it’s easy to see how much she loves to dance. It’s also easy to see that she belongs on stage and that I should probably encourage her to not give up on her dream.
When the song ends, I start clapping. Pure joy spreads across her face. She walks, prances is more like it, and turns off her mp3 player.
“How long have you been standing there?”
“Just a few minutes,” I say, stepping into the room. Yvie and I were able to move most of the stuff easily into the corner to give her enough space to dance. Once it was clean, and I pulled down the fabric cover on one of the walls, we realized that this room used to be used for dance. The wall is floor to ceiling with mirrors with existing brackets to hold a barre. I made the mistake of telling her that I’d get it cleaned up so that she had a place to practice. It didn’t escape my notice that her eyes shifted, a subtle reminder that she’s leaving yet again.
“Did you like what you saw?” she asks, as she twirls in the middle of the room. I walk up to her, and she stops in front of me. I take her hand and spin her around, once. Seeing her face light up from my one sorry dance move is worth being cheesy for a second.
“That’s pretty good, Mr. Knight. Is there a night of dancing in our future?”
I shake my head and place my hands on her hips. I pull her close and sway even though there’s no music playing. “I’m a mean slow dancer, but that’s about it.”
Yvie laughs and leans back, encouraging me to dip her. I do and welcome the feeling of her breasts brushing against me when I pull her up. “I could teach you how to dance,” she says, turning in my arms and leaning her back to my front. Her hips start to move against mine and her arm comes up and her hand cups the back of my neck as she grinds against me.
“If this is dancing, I could get used to it.” Yvie giggles and keeps us moving. I press my lips to her shoulder and continue to move along with her. I plan to take her out on a date while she’s here. Ralph’s throws a pretty big New Year’s Eve party, and 4225 West is playing. I’m sure she’ll want to watch her brother perform while she’s here.
As I kiss along her shoulder, all I can think about is taking her back to my house. When I get to her ear, I pull her lobe gently and whisper, “Will you be my date for Liam and Josie’s anniversary party tomorrow?”
She stops moving and turns in my arms. Her hands ghost up my arms, over my shoulders until her fingers are playing with the scruff on my face. I didn’t have time to shave this morning, and right now I’m enjoying the way her fingers feel against my skin.
“You know I have my own invite.”
“They don’t know you’re here,” I remind her. “We could show up together and surprise them.”
We start swaying again, and I take this opportunity to kiss her. I know I shouldn’t since I’m at work, but all thoughts of professionalism are out the door the moment our tongues touch. Now all I’m thinking about is pushing her up against the mirror and watching her face as I take her from behind. She has awoken so many fantasies that I feel like a pervert trying to get them all done before she leaves. The last thing I want is for our relationship, or whatever this is, to be based solely on sex. I want to know her. I want to be her friend. I want to be her lover and confidant, even if it means that once this week is over, we’re only friends. I can be her shoulder to cry on or the person she needs to vent to at the end of the night.
“Excuse me, Xander?”
I startle at the sound of my name and pull away from Yvie mid-kiss. I look over my shoulder and find Dana, the waitress from Whimsicality, standing in the doorway. My hands fall away from Yvie, and I turn to Dana.
“Hey, Dana, what’s up?”
Dana is usually all smiles when I see her, but not today. “We have an appointment. I can reschedule if you’re too busy.” She leans a little to the left to get a good look at Yvie. I look at the clock on the wall and nod.
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