Clean Start

by S. M. Shade

  “It’s okay.”

  Neal locks his door, and we head to my place. Mallory sits on the couch watching Aiden play his game.

  “Thanks Mallory. I really appreciate you keeping an eye on him,” I tell her. “Neal is going to sit with him while we run an errand.”

  “Sure, anytime. I should get going. I have company coming.”

  “Neal! Play the second player!” Aiden pipes up, shoving the controller toward him. He’s suddenly aware a world still exists outside his game.

  “You’ll have to teach me,” Neal tells him, sitting cross legged on the floor beside him.

  “You have until I get back, Aiden. Then it’s bath and bed.”

  Aiden doesn’t answer, and Neal waves us off.

  Bailey is quiet until we get to the store. “I don’t want tampons,” she whispers.

  “There are a lot of different pads, and they’re really thin. We’ll get a couple of different brands, so you can see what works for you.”

  We end up with everything I can think of to help during the monthly egg massacre. Pads, painkillers, a heating pad, a chocolate cake, and some plain colored cotton panties. “You’ll end up sacrificing a pair every now and then. It happens to all of us. Better to have some extras,” I tell her.

  I also pick up a small calendar and show her how to count the days, so she can try to figure out her cycle. “It may not be regular when you’re so young, so don’t be surprised if it doesn’t stick to a schedule at first. Mine didn’t.”

  “God, it’s going to be every month,” she groans as we climb back into my car. “I wish I was a boy.”

  “Nah, can you imagine how annoying having a penis and testicles must be?”

  She giggles. “That’s true. They must get in the way. I wonder if they ever sit on them.”

  “That’s a question I’d pay to hear you ask your dad,” I laugh.

  “I think I traumatized him enough for one night.” She hesitates for a second before asking, “Can I stay with you tonight?”

  My heart goes out to her, and I understand wanting a woman she trusts close by. “Absolutely. But you have to share the chocolate cake.”

  “Deal.”

  Aiden is practically falling asleep sitting in front of the TV when we walk in. “Aiden, it’s bed time. You can just take a bath in the morning.”

  I’ll have to wash his sheets, but it’s about time anyway.

  “’Kay.”

  I know he’s tired when he doesn’t argue. I glance at Neal. “Hang out while I get him to bed, okay?”

  “Yeah.”

  Aiden is asleep before I shut his bedroom door. I grab a pillow and blanket from my bed, then plug in the heating pad beside it before returning to the living room.

  Bailey is curled up in the corner of the couch, her eyes drooping. “Do you want a piece of cake?”

  “Not right now. Dad said I can stay the night.”

  He’d probably be happy for her to stay three to five days. “Come on. You can have my bed. I sleep on the couch half the time.”

  She climbs into bed, and I bring her a glass of water and a painkiller. “If you wake up hurting, put the heating pad on your stomach, but keep it on low. And come get me if you need me.”

  “I will. Thanks, Veronica.” She snuggles down under the covers.

  “You’re welcome, honey. Things will look better in the morning.” I turn off the bedside lamp.

  “And we can have cake for breakfast,” she murmurs.

  “It’s a plan.”

  I close the bedroom door and return to the living room where Neal waits. “Do you need another pep talk too?” I tease.

  He gathers the two video game controllers from the floor and places them on the coffee table. “I’m not going to live down tonight, am I?”

  “No way.”

  Taking a seat on the couch, he flashes me a smile that makes me want to take my panties off. “Thanks for everything you did for her.”

  “Anytime. She’s such a sweet kid, and she’ll be fine. This is all normal stuff, you know?”

  He chuckles, and his head falls back on the top of the couch. “Yeah, well, I’m more qualified to discuss hard-ons and shaving.”

  Exhaustion is catching up with me as I flop onto the opposite side of the couch. “Don’t worry, she’ll have those questions too.”

  “Now you’re just torturing me.”

  “Maybe a little.” I fold my legs underneath me. “I was glad for the distraction tonight. I ran into Aiden’s father at the grocery store.”

  Neal’s brow crumples. “What happened?”

  “He ignored me, sneaked past Aiden, and took off. Not that I wanted him to say anything to him, but—”

  “But he should want to,” Neal finishes. Even his mad face is adorable. His lips press together, and a line appears in the center of his forehead. “He’d better hope I never run into him. Aiden’s a great kid. He should be proud.”

  “I know. There’s no use thinking about it though, so I just wish terrible things on him in my head.”

  His eyebrow raises. “Like car accidents and stuff?”

  “No, more like, I hope his asshole grows taste buds.”

  The sound of his laughter does things to me. It’s deep and quiet, fading to almost silent when he laughs really hard, his body vibrating. His pale blue eyes glow in the low light when he looks at me.

  “I hope I never piss you off. Okay, let’s come up with some more bad luck for…”

  “Clint.”

  “Clit? You actually got naked for a guy named Clit?”

  “Clint!” I repeat, shoving him. “He wouldn’t know a clit if it slapped him in the face. I hope he gets that feeling that he needs to sneeze, but can never sneeze.”

  Neal sits back and crosses his arms, thinking. “I hope every time he has to shit, there’s one stubborn chunk that gets stuck. So no matter how long he wipes, it’s like wiping the tip of a marker.”

  “Ew! That’s gross.” The stress of the day lifts from my shoulders as I laugh. “I hope the sound is just slightly out of sync on every video he ever tries to watch.”

  “Diabolical. I hope every pizza he orders is delivered upside down.”

  “Oh, heartless. Pizza is life.” He smiles at me, and I swear it goes straight to my stomach. What the hell, Veronica? You know he’s off limits.

  “Feel better?”

  “I do. Now move your ass so I can crash. It’s been a long day.”

  “Yes, dear,” he mocks, getting to his feet.

  I’m grabbed in an unexpected hug when I stand. His body is so warm, and he smells amazing. My muscles relax, and I squeeze him back. When he lets go, he steps back and awkwardness sneaks in around us. “Good night,” he finally says.

  “Good night.”

  As tired as I am, I spend a few minutes tossing and turning, my unsettled emotions taking over. I can’t pinpoint what I’m feeling. Maybe I’m just freaking out because I’m feeling anything for a man when I haven’t let that happen for a long time.

  I need to put things in perspective again.

  Neal is just a friend. I’m not looking for a relationship or a hookup even if he was willing. I have enough to worry about just keeping a roof over my son’s head. There’s just not room for anyone else.

  Chapter Four

  Neal

  “Dad!” Bailey runs into the house, her ponytail flying. “Veronica got an eviction letter and so did the twin’s mom!”

  What the hell?

  My hands fall to her shoulders as she looks up at me. “What are you talking about?”

  “They put letters on their door that say they could get kicked out. Everyone is talking about it.”

  This may be a close knit neighborhood, but that doesn’t include the management. Since they’ve taken over, it’s one new draconian rule after another. The show we put on during the monthly inspections put a stop to those at least. I think Noble masturbating to gay porn probably made the decision there, but it hasn’t st
opped them from trying more and more bullshit.

  George, the owner of Jetsky’s Car Wash, set me up with a lawyer who does pro bono work for low income people, and he’s working on gathering evidence of some of the clearly illegal practices. Like stealing the kids toys and bikes if they’re left in the yard. And I don’t mean they pick up toys left out for days. A mother of a two-year-old took him in to change a diaper and came back to find his little ride-on toy gone. When she called the office, they told her she could buy it back for five dollars. We live in the poorest neighborhood in town and they’re stealing from kids who have little to nothing.

  “Is Veronica home?” I ask Bailey.

  “She’s over at the park talking to the twins’ mom.”

  I’ve seen Veronica almost every day since our zoo trip, but I still feel the same anticipation when I head out the door.

  A group of neighbors mill around the park, standing in small groups and sitting at the picnic table while their kids play.

  Veronica walks toward me as I approach, her jaw tight and rage in her eyes. I’ve never seen her so pissed off. “What’s going on?”

  Without a word, she hands me a sheet of paper. “I got another threat letter.”

  Threat letters, as we’ve started calling them, have become a common thing. They leave a letter on everyone’s door when they change a rule or notice something they don’t like. Last week a man on the other end got one because he had his granddaughter visiting, and she drew a hopscotch on the sidewalk with chalk. They threatened him with eviction if it happened again. Then they put a letter on the rest of the doors stating that sidewalk chalk is graffiti and grounds for eviction. You can’t make this shit up.

  They can’t just say not to do something, it always includes an or else eviction threat. It seems they get off on threatening to make poor people homeless. One bit of advice I have received from the lawyer is that none of the reasons they’ve given would justify an eviction, and to save the letters.

  Veronica’s letter is infuriating and it’s everything I can do not to go down to the office, drag the bastards outside, and show them how you should treat a bully.

  My teeth grind as I read the main paragraph again.

  Your son has been seen throwing handfuls of the rubber mulch into the air in the playground. Rubber mulch is very expensive and if he persists in this behavior, you will be charged for the replacement mulch and face eviction. Please remedy this situation.

  An eviction threat for a kid playing in the playground.

  Veronica’s smile is bitter when I look up at her, and she turns to glance back at her son who is playing with some other kids in the playground. “I asked Aiden and the other kids if they threw the mulch, and they said they were tossing it up in the air and letting it rain down on them. It’s fucking ridiculous. They weren’t taking it out of the park or harming anything.”

  Jani speaks up. “And even if it is something they don’t want the kids doing, how hard is it to say, hey, don’t play with the mulch. There, problem solved. No, they have to be a dick sneeze about it and threaten people.”

  Aiden runs up, and his gaze travels around the circle of adults before he asks, “Am I in trouble?”

  Veronica smoothes her hand over his hair. “Not at all. Just don’t throw the mulch and tell the other kids the same thing, okay?”

  “Okay. Damon says his aunt almost got kicked out because he jumped the fence last week, so don’t jump fences,” he warns the group with a wise nod.

  Noble grins at him. “No fence jumping. Got it, dude.” When Aiden runs off, Noble turns to me. “Yeah, there’s more to that story. They didn’t just tag her door. Freida saw the kid jump the fence and asked him if he wanted to make his aunt homeless because if he did it again, she’d be out. He’s nine.”

  Nodding, I announce. “If you all can bring me copies of the threat letters you’ve received, I’ll get them to the lawyer. Also, any written statements you might be willing to contribute about the way you or your kids have been treated. None of this shit is legal.” I look around at everyone. “And I understand if that’s not a risk you’re willing to take as well. We all have to keep a roof over our heads.”

  So many here can’t afford to move, which is why I decided to lead this cause. I’m close to having my credit repaired and I can move if I have to. It would suck, because I have a few goals in mind I’m trying to reach to make sure we’re good and stable first, but it could be done. If they’re going to retaliate by evicting someone, better it be us than a family that would end up on the street.

  “I have a copier if anyone needs to use it,” Noble volunteers before pulling me aside. “I have an idea. You know I work at WFUK, and if I brought this to their attention, they may be willing to do a story. Take this shit public. I wanted to see what the lawyer thought about that idea first, though.”

  “I’ll get in touch with him this week and see if he thinks it’s a good idea.”

  Noble nods, then grins at me. “By the way, we need a DM for Dungeons and Dragons tonight. You said you used to play when you were young.”

  “You mean when this was all still farm land?” I scoff. “I’m thirty-three, not eighty.”

  “Whatever, just grab your daily fiber drink, and come and DM for us.”

  It’s been years since I played D&D, and the nerd in me is still strong. Noble and his friends might be a bunch of college kids, but they’re fun to be around, at least in small doses. I guess that’s the old man in me talking. It’s funny I don’t see Veronica the same way. “What time?”

  “Eight o’clock.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  Noble only lives a few doors down, so I’m fine with letting Bailey stay alone for a couple of hours, and she’ll be thrilled.

  Noble goes back to the group, and I start back across the street to my apartment to let Bailey know that no one is being evicted. It pisses me off that the management makes these kids worry over things that are in no way a child’s problem.

  “Neal!” Veronica calls, and jogs to catch up with me. Wow, she’s not wearing a bra. “Did you hear about the lock-in at the community center this weekend?”

  “What’s a lock-in?”

  She falls in step beside me. “Since it’s spring break, they’re having a little sleepover party for kids ages four and up. They’ll have activities for them and they’ll camp out in the gym in their sleeping bags. I guess I’m going to let Aiden go since he’s begging to, and I thought Bailey might be interested.”

  “I’m sure she will. Thanks for letting me know.” I pause, laying my hand on her arm. “Don’t worry about these threat letters. Nobody is getting evicted. I’ve got this.”

  A smile stretches across her cheeks. “I believe you.” She glances back at Aiden who is sitting on the curb. “I’d better get back to Aiden. He’s driving me nuts. He won’t eat because he has a loose tooth, but he’s afraid to let me pull it. I swear, I’m going to pull it while he’s asleep.”

  “Bailey was the same way. Can I try something?”

  “Sure, but I doubt he’ll go for it.”

  “I’ll be over in just a minute.”

  They head back to her apartment, and I run inside to grab a remote controlled airplane. It was a gift to Bailey, but I’ve played with it more. Bailey was all freaked out over pulling a loose tooth, and I found it was best to find a creative way to do it and get her involved. Last time we tied one to a nerf dart and had her shoot the gun. Aiden likes planes so this should work well.

  “A, come check this out!” I call to him as I step into Veronica’s yard.

  He rushes over. “A plane! Can I fly it?”

  “You sure can, but this is a special plane. It goes faster if you give it some special fuel.” Veronica watches us, and I give her a wink.

  “Like gas?”

  “Well, your mom says you have a loose tooth.” I produce a roll of floss and show him. “If I put this string around your tooth, the plane will go extra fast, and the tooth will fall
out without you even feeling it.”

  His mouth drops open and he whispers, “Really?”

  Bailey speaks up, showing him where one of her back teeth is missing. “It worked with mine.”

  “Okay! Do mine! I want to make the plane fly fast!”

  Aiden holds still as I tie the floss around the tooth. It damn near comes out just with that, so this will be easy. “Okay, let’s do it.” I turn the plane on and show him how to control it. I made the floss long enough to give it enough slack that the tooth won’t catch until the plane is in the air and a few feet away. “You can take off anytime, Captain.”

  Grinning with excitement, he presses the lever forward and the plane darts into the air, taking his tooth with it in a split second. “It does go fast!” he exclaims.

  “Let me show you how to turn it around.” We spend a few minutes guiding the plane around the yard before he lands it on the sidewalk.

  “That was so cool! When will my tooth fall out?”

  Bailey laughs and follows the floss until she picks up the tooth lying at the end. “Your tooth is right here.”

  Aiden’s stunned look makes us all laugh especially when he puts his fingers in his mouth and feels the hole. “It worked! Mom, look! It didn’t hurt!” he cries, running over to show her the gap.

  Veronica hugs him and beams at me. “It did! What do you tell Neal?”

  “Thank you!” he shouts and runs over, hugging my leg.

  Bailey sits down with him to look at his tooth while I chat with Veronica for another minute until she says, “Thanks again. I have to go into work for a few hours since the front desk clerk is sick. We’ll see you later.”

  And now I need to brush the dust off of my D&D handbook and drag out one of my old stories for tonight.

  # # #

  I’m officially too old to hang out with college kids. Not that I wasn’t aware of that fact, but his offer for a Dungeons and Dragons game had me all nostalgic for the days when I played in high school and college.

  Some things you can’t go back to.

  My memories of Dungeons and Dragons were late nights spent creating these layered, deeply thought out worlds, full of magic and mystery. We designed characters that had personalities, strengths, weaknesses, and personal goals.