Breathe Into Me

by Michelle Betham

  “It isn’t love, what she feels for Lukas. It isn’t, Aaron. Believe me. I know Quinn, and I know – OK, she still feels something for him, but whatever it is, it isn’t love. And what happened to you two getting stronger? Concentrate on that. Concentrate on you and Quinn because that’s all that matters.”

  Aaron sat back down, dropping his head into his hands, and Harry knew this needed to stop, now. He was coming dangerously close to cracking here, and that wasn’t something that should be happening in full view of an entire movie set. Not to mention the crowds who’d gathered to watch behind the cordons they’d set up around the perimeters; the paparazzi who were in constant wait for that one, perfect picture.

  “Get it together, Aaron. Come on, son.”

  Aaron raised his head, glancing back over at Lukas and Quinn. She was laughing now. He was talking to her, and he was smiling, and whatever he’d said to her she obviously found it amusing, he could hear her laughter even from back where he was watching.

  “Aaron…”

  “I’m OK. I’m fine, Harry.”

  “All you have to do is concentrate on you and Quinn. Do that, and you’ll be fine.”

  “Yeah.” Aaron ran a hand back through his hair, breathing a sigh of relief as Lukas finally called an end to that scene and Quinn turned and headed back over to him. “Yeah. I know.”

  “Everything all right?” Quinn asked as she reached Aaron and Harry, looking from one to the other.

  “Why wouldn’t it be?” Harry replied. Quinn just raised an eyebrow and threw him a look.

  “You done for now?” Aaron held out his hand, which Quinn took, allowing him to pull her down onto his lap.

  “Yeah. Until later this afternoon. Your turn next, huh?”

  “Yeah,” he sighed, sliding a hand up over her thigh. “My turn next.”

  Quinn’s eyes followed his gaze, falling on Lukas as he and his first assistant compared notes on something. “You sure you’re OK?” she asked, turning her attention back to Aaron.

  “I’m fine.”

  “Really?”

  “Quinn, I’m fine… I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m just… I’m a little stressed out, that’s all.”

  “About what you think might be going on?”

  “He’s pissing me off, Quinn. The way he’s…”

  She made to climb off him but he pulled her back down, and Harry watched as Aaron quickly tried to diffuse the situation.

  “I’m sorry. It’s just been a long day, and it isn’t over yet, and I guess I just want to go home, relax... strip my beautiful wife naked, and make love to her until her body aches…”

  Harry breathed a quiet sigh of relief as he watched Quinn practically melt into Aaron’s arms, the kiss they shared probably a touch too graphic for such a public place, and he did have a hand on her tit but, what the hell. They were married. And they never had been the kind of couple to hide their feelings. Besides, he was all for her being blinded by the crap that came out of Aaron’s mouth, because Aaron was genuine. Aaron loved her. Lukas Drake had ulterior motives.

  “Well, your wife quite likes the idea of her husband stripping her naked. And, baby, her body can take whatever the hell he’s willing to give her, right now, in fact, if he’s got time…”

  Aaron grinned, and Harry felt like high-5ing someone. Sometimes shit worked out just when you needed it to.

  “Come on. My trailer’s closest,” Aaron said, lifting her off his knee and taking her hand, and Harry watched as they ran off like a couple of horny teenagers to do whatever it was they were planning to do before Aaron had to go out there and fight Lukas – albeit for a purely fictional reason – for the better part of the afternoon. And, yeah, they were acting like kids, but right now that was fine. If it stopped the tension and the games then they could act like kids for the rest of this shoot.

  “Where’d Quinn go?”

  Harry looked up to see Lukas, his eyes darting this way and that as he looked around the set.

  “She’s with Aaron.”

  “Doing what?” Lukas asked, narrowing his eyes slightly.

  “Not sure that’s entirely your business. She’s done her bit for now, hasn’t she? Unless you need her for something. Do you need her for something?”

  “No.”

  “Then let’s not play this game, Lukas. OK? Leave them alone. Let them get on with their lives. Look, you’ve rebuilt an incredible career for yourself after everything that happened. Everyone had you written off, including me, I mean, if I’m being honest, I hoped you’d just disappear and never darken Hollywood’s door again, but I guess I can’t have everything. But you did it. You pulled yourself back up and you built yourself a new life. A good life. Without Quinn. And she did the same, without you. So, let’s just try and keep it that way.”

  “None of it means shit without her, Harry.”

  “Grow up, Lukas. She’s moved on.”

  “She came back to me. I almost had her.”

  “But she walked away, again. She just needed to get you out of her system, she was never gonna come back to you. Because she knows what would happen if she did. And I won’t let her do it.”

  “It’s got nothing to do with you.”

  “It’s got everything to do with me, Lukas. You didn’t see the state you left her in, you never saw any of that first hand, but I did. I saw it all, I was there, for everything, every fucking breakdown she suffered, every night she couldn’t sleep because you weren’t in her bed. You saw nothing. I saw it all, I fucking lived it, and this – it has everything to do with me. So back off, grow up, and leave her the fuck alone.”

  Lukas laughed quietly, his eyes never leaving Harry’s. “I know you treat her like this little girl who doesn’t know her own mind, I get that. But she’s all grown up now, Harry, and I know – I know what’s happening. I could see it in her eyes, as I held her; when I fucked her I could see it, right there. She’s still in love with me. She’s just frightened of facing that reality head-on because too many people are telling her shit, making her believe crap that just isn’t true. I’m not that manipulative monster everyone had me down as. I was never that man.”

  “And if you really want me to believe that, Lukas, then you’ll back off and leave her and Aaron to get on with their life.”

  “I’m not that man anymore. I see everything so much more clearly now. And I saw it in her eyes. We didn’t just have sex that night, it wasn’t just some random fuck for old time’s sake…”

  “Jesus, do I need to hear this?”

  “That connection is still there. And you want me to just forget that?”

  “That’s exactly what I want you to do…”

  “Am I interrupting something?”

  Harry swung around to see Dawn Jenner approach them, and the expression on Lukas’s face didn’t escape Harry’s notice. He looked almost shocked to see her. “No. We’re done,” Harry said, his focus still on Lukas, who seemed more than a little uncomfortable in Dawn’s presence. And there was a sudden, almost strange atmosphere in the air now, which kind of unnerved Harry slightly. Was there something going on here he didn’t know about? “OK, Lukas?”

  “Hmm? Oh, yeah. Yeah. We’re done.”

  Harry turned to go, but he couldn’t stop himself from looking back to see Lukas gently guiding Dawn by the elbow away from the main part of the set. He’d had no idea Dawn Jenner and Lukas Drake were still close. He knew she’d had a major crush on Lukas for most of the time he and Quinn had been together, and he also knew she’d stood by him throughout his time in rehab, but he didn’t know if their relationship had ever gone past being friends. It couldn’t have done, otherwise the media would’ve jumped on that, surely? So why was she here, on the set of his movie, when Harry felt sure she wasn’t connected to this film in any way? And why did Lukas look more than a little surprised to see her? Whatever the reason, Harry just hoped it wasn’t going to add to an already complicated situation. But he was talking about Lukas Drake here. And where that man w
as concerned…

  ***

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” Lukas hissed, letting go of Dawn’s arm, because he wasn’t entirely sure this conversation was being held completely in private. There was no such thing as complete privacy on a movie set as busy as this one. “What did I tell you about coming here? You don’t set foot on this fucking set, do you hear me? You don’t…”

  “Was she worth it, huh?”

  Lukas frowned. “What the hell are you talking about?”

  “I took a lot, from you, Lukas. And some people may call me stupid; naïve. Some people may say I’ve been blinded by this decades-long infatuation I’ve had with you because, let’s face it, it’s led me to put up with some real twisted shit. But you never went as far as humiliating me. You always managed to spare me that. But now…”

  “I’m not doing this here, Dawn. Whatever this is, I’m not doing it here.”

  “You don’t get a fucking choice anymore, Lukas. Because I’m tired of this crap now. I deserve better than this; better than you. For too long I just sat back and hoped that, one day, you’d actually move on and see that she wasn’t coming back to you, and I know that when I married you I was more than aware of the situation, but…” She briefly looked down, giving a small, slightly cynical chuckle as she pushed her hands back through her hair. And then she raised her gaze and her eyes met his and he felt a chill trickle slowly down his spine. “I’m tired of it now, Lukas. I’m tired of waiting and hoping and taking what little piece of yourself you give to me, when you can be bothered. I mean, when was the last time we slept together, huh? When was that? Can you remember?”

  “Not here, Dawn…”

  “And why did you insist we get married, huh? Why? If you were never gonna… Jesus! You don’t even want to live in the same house as me! How could I have just stood by and let all this crap happen? Have I really been that stupid?”

  “Dawn…”

  “I mean, you haven’t touched me; you haven’t even shared so much as a dinner with me for – Christ. I can’t even recall the last time we actually sat down together and… No. I’m tired of it now, Lukas.”

  “I’ll come over tonight, OK? And whatever’s bothering you…”

  “You fucked her, didn’t you?”

  Lukas’s frown deepened. “What the hell are you…?”

  “I know, Lukas. I know she was there, with you, in a house I didn’t even know you fucking had, that’s how much you really think about me. What is it, huh? That house in Venice that you don’t think I should know about? Some kind of secret fuck nest…?”

  He grabbed her arm again and dragged her further away from the set. “You had me followed?”

  “I had her followed. And I’ve got pictures, Lukas. I mean, come on, if you don’t want to be caught fucking your co-star’s wife then you close the blinds. Schoolboy error there, darlin’.”

  “Aaron already knows, Dawn, so if this is some kind of blackmail…”

  “I’m not doing this to get something out of you, Lukas. I just needed to know, before I exposed our whole sordid little situation, because that is a story people out there are gonna kill for.”

  “Jesus, Dawn, think about what you’re doing.”

  “Oh, I’ve done nothing but think – about all the years I wasted wanting you, hoping you’d see fucking sense, but you never will. You’re too fucked up inside, over her, to ever let yourself be free. And I can’t be a part of that anymore. I need someone who is gonna love me, not use me. And no, I didn’t complain, not for a long time, because I loved you, Lukas. I loved you, despite everything. Even though I knew you couldn’t love me back, not the way I really wanted you to. But I always hoped…” She stepped back from him and shook her head. “No. I’m done now. That was the final straw. Seeing you, fucking her…” She pulled a handful of A4 photographs from her purse and threw them at him. “Here. These are yours. I’ve got my own copies. And I have to say, Lukas, I can kind of understand what you see in her. I mean, she is hot. I wouldn’t mind a go on her myself, but then, from what I can gather, in your younger days that’s something you probably would’ve quite liked to watch, huh?”

  “For Christ’s sake, Dawn…”

  But she was already walking away, and all Lukas could do was watch, and hope that whatever she was threatening, she didn’t have the guts to go through with it. Because if she did, who knew the kind of fallout that was going to cause…

  Nineteen

  The water cascaded down over her body and she closed her eyes and pressed herself against the glass screen as his hands soaped her hips and thighs, his lips brushing the back of her neck. She felt her stomach clench, the groan that seeped out of her low and slow as his fingers found their way between her legs, forcing her to widen her stance. And when his body pressed up against hers, his strong arms wrapping around her, she let him pull her back, moving her head slightly until his mouth caught hers, the water raining down on them.

  He slowly turned her around and lifted her up, pushing her back against the tiled wall, pulling her onto his throbbing cock and she groaned louder, her fingers digging into his flesh as he thrust into her. It was beautiful and sensual and just slightly uncomfortable but she kept her legs wrapped tight around his hips, her arms loose around his neck as he kissed her deep and fucked her hard. And when she came it was raw and brutal, making her head spin and her body convulse in a series of short, sharp spasms, and he held onto her until it all subsided, before he took his own pleasure, thrusting even harder until she felt him spill out inside of her, his body stilling as his own climax took hold.

  “And that’s how you take a shower,” Aaron breathed, barely able to get the words out his chest was so tight.

  Quinn laughed, keeping her legs wrapped around him as the water continued to rain down on them. “I don’t deserve you,” she whispered, her own breathing heavy and ragged, her body still tingling.

  Aaron rested his forehead against hers, smiling slightly as he pushed the damp hair from her eyes. “Don’t go there, Quinn. Please.” He reached out and switched off the shower, gently lowering her down, keeping an arm around her. “We don’t even allude to it; to him, remember?”

  She nodded, resting her palm against his chest as she looked up at him, the corner of her mouth edging up into a slow, sideways smile. “I still can’t believe I’ve got such a hot husband.”

  He threw his head back and laughed, and Quinn felt her stomach clench tight. She loved to watch him laugh. It was such a sexy sound; such a beautiful sight.

  “Yeah, well, my wife…” He laid a hand against her cheek, tilting her head back slightly, his mouth almost touching hers, “she’s way hotter.”

  “Flattery will get you everywhere, Mr. Rogers.”

  “That’s what I was aiming for.”

  She closed her eyes as he kissed her slowly, his fingers winding in her damp hair, their soaking wet bodies pressed together. “But later, handsome, OK? Or we’re gonna be really late.”

  He groaned as he reluctantly pulled back from her, then he grinned, and Quinn didn’t think she’d loved this man more than she did right now. “We could call in sick.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “What? Both of us? ‘Cause, you know, that wouldn’t look at all suspicious.”

  He pulled her back into his arms, still smiling. “We could have ourselves a day in bed. Make some movies of our own.”

  She looked at him in mock shock. “Aaron Rogers! You want us to have our own sex tape?”

  “Hell, yes!”

  “OK. We can do that.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Yeah.” She rested her mouth against his, smiling slightly. “I’d quite like to watch my super-hot husband, all naked and sexy-as-hell, fucking me.”

  “I love you so freaking much…”

  “But not today.” She pushed him gently away. “We’re not calling in sick, we’re not horny teenagers skipping school. We’ve got work to do.”

  He pulled her back into his arms, his
voice deep and dirty as he almost growled the words out. “Do you know how ridiculously hot you are when you go all English and strict?”

  “You’re killing me here, Rogers. And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but, go put some clothes on.”

  “You sure?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “I’ll give you a second to think about that.”

  Quinn laughed, and she wished with every beat of her heart that they didn’t have to leave the house today. But they had to be professional. They didn’t turn up for work, and that cost the studio, big time. “Go, mister. Go on.”

  He slid a hand round onto her ass and squeezed it as he kissed her quickly. “I’m on a promise, right?”

  “Oh, you’re on a million of those, handsome.”

  He threw her one last grin before he stepped out of the shower, and Quinn took a second to just look at him. He was perfect, in her eyes. Hot-as-hell, too handsome for his own good with a body so beautiful there were times when she wondered how he could even be real. But he was also the most incredible, kind and gentle man; beautiful inside as well as out, and she didn’t deserve him. She didn’t. Because she’d been willing to risk everything she and Aaron had for Lukas Drake. And that had almost cost her her marriage. What kind of idiot had she been?

  She headed into the bedroom and quickly dried her hair, pulling on skinny jeans, her favorite battered biker boots and a tight black T-shirt before she joined Aaron in the kitchen. He was making coffee, singing along to AC/DC’s ‘Back in Black’, and again she took a second to just watch him. This was how it had been all the time, in the beginning, when they’d first moved in together – incredible morning sex followed by breakfast and music and laughter as they’d slowly fallen deeper and deeper in love. And she’d slowly forgotten all about Lukas Drake. Except, she hadn’t, had she? Not really. She’d never been able to put Lukas completely behind her, but she was ready to do that now. Coming so close to losing Aaron had shocked her; scared her. So she was ready, to put Lukas behind her.