Death Wish

by Lindsey Menges

  The ghost of a smile hovers over my lips, but I don’t respond. There is a rustling noise, and a paper cup materializes in front of my eyes. I do smile this time and take the drink the Chief offers me.

  I look down at the champagne inside. The small bubbles of carbonation breaking across the surface instantly make me think of Alli and her beloved sodas. I let a huff out through my nose before taking a small sip. When I lower the cup and look to the side, Darian is staring at me expectedly. I sigh again.

  “How do you do it?” I can’t help but ask him the question that’s been plaguing me ever since I started aiding their cause.

  “Do what?” His voice is low, gentle.

  I gesture out into the crowd of happy rebels who are oblivious to the somber mood of our tiny corner. “I mean, obviously you can be yourself when you’re with everyone here. But is there anyone you’ve had to lie to? Anyone you care about that you have to deceive in order to keep them safe?”

  Darian nods and sets down his cup. “Yes, actually. My brother.”

  “Your brother?” I’m surprised. I had no idea that the Chief had any family. But then again, I don’t know anything about him beyond the fact that he’s the group’s leader.

  He nods. “Yeah. And let me tell you, having to lie to him still breaks my heart every day. But he believes in the Death Wish system so strongly and with such passion that I know he would turn me over to the Security Branch in an instant if he found out what I was doing.”

  Would Harrison report me if I told him the truth? No, I know he wouldn’t. And besides, fear of being caught isn’t the reason I’ve kept this part of my life secret.

  “I can’t tell Harrison either. But that’s because I know telling him would put him in danger.”

  Darian nods again. “It would. Every single person in this room, including you, is putting themselves in danger. And while Agent Sun may be the only one without a working Life Chip, we are all taking the risk of being killed by working for this cause.”

  I look over at Robin, who’s surrounded by people still in awe of the experiment’s success. Kelly hasn’t left her side, and they are both smiling and laughing while they talk with the excited individuals who press close to them. I envy Robin for being with someone who knows the truth about her, who knows and shares every facet of her life.

  “It isn’t easy for them either, you know,” says Darian, catching me staring at the two women across the room. “They both have to live with the knowledge that the person they love could be killed at any moment. One wrong word, one stupid move, and they could lose each other forever.”

  I grip my pendent tight. That’s why I won’t say anything to Harrison. I won’t put the man I love in danger. “I’m not going to make a stupid move,” I vow. “I won’t let myself get killed and force Harrison to go on without me.”

  Darian chuckles. I glare at him and he stops.

  “You can laugh all you want,” I say. “But all my life I’ve done everything I can to keep the people I care about happy, safe, and fulfilled. After all, that’s why I became a Godmother. So I’m sure you can imagine that my need to protect and care for someone is multiplied infinitely when they’re the one I love.”

  I set my drink down on the ground, only one sip taken.

  “I will keep him safe no matter what, even if that means I have to lie to protect him.” I’m making the promise to myself as much as I’m making it to Darian. “Thanks for the drink. I’ll see you later.” I stand up and move away to say hello to the newly-mortal Robin.

  Darian calls out to me. “Your Harrison is a very lucky young man.”

  I move my hand back to my necklace.

  No, I think to myself, I’m the lucky one.

  Wish 27

  “Hey, Eliza!”

  I look up. Alli and James wave to me from outside my office. After the mild argument I had with Chief Darian last night, I wanted to get into the office as early as possible today. Working on Wish paperwork is mindless and repetitive, and never fails to calm me down.

  I smile and motion for the twins to come inside. “Hey, you two,” I say while they sit down. “How are you?”

  “Oh my gosh, Eliza,” says Alli, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “Something amazing has happened!”

  “Well, I think it’s more freaky than amazing,” corrects James, but he still looks energized by whatever’s going on.

  “What is it?” I smile at their sibling bickering.

  They look at each other, look behind them to make sure no one’s in the hallway, and then whisper in hissed unison. “Someone’s Life Chip went offline!”

  My stomach drops. Do they know about Robin and the Revolutionaries? I will my racing heartbeat to slow down while I pretend to look shocked. It isn’t hard—I wasn’t expecting anyone to know about Robin’s Chip this soon, let alone two uninvolved Engineers.

  “You mean someone died without submitting a Wish again?” I put just the right amount of fear into my voice. They both shake their heads at the same time, and the motion would be funny if I wasn’t so terrified right now.

  “No, that’s the crazy part,” says James.

  “Apparently the Chip just turned off. But the person didn’t die,” Alli explains, her words blurring together in her haste to tell the story. “Now they’re just walking around with an inoperable Chip, and no one knows what happened!”

  I relax somewhat. At least no one knows that the research I’ve helped gather is one of the reasons Robin’s Life Chip was successfully disabled. The twin Engineers continue chattering excitedly, but I can’t focus. Is Robin safe? Does everyone know what happened to her? Do people think it’s an accident, or something more?

  “—and I guess some of the top tier agents for the Security branch are looking into this.”

  James’ comment snaps me out of my reverie.

  “What?” I shout, and curse silently when they jump at my outburst and stare. “I mean,” I correct, “some of the people on high are investigating? Why would it go all the way to them?”

  James looks to Alli, who dives in with an answer. “I bet it’s because they’re freaked out. I mean, what if some sort of virus has gotten into the Life Chip system? It could mean that, at any moment, someone’s Life Chip could go down! Eliza—that means people could die without submitting a Death Wish.”

  She claps her hand over her mouth, as if simply saying those words created the terrifying possibility. Her eyes tear up, and James pats her shoulder in concern.

  “Hey,” he soothes, “don’t worry, sis, it’s not as bad as all that. Maybe that person got a faulty Chip when they were born and it’s acting up now. Don’t worry, the higher-ups will figure out what’s behind this. They’ll take care of it.”

  I nod, but all I can think is:

  That’s what I’m afraid of.

  *

  Alli and James leave my office a half-hour later, and as soon as they’re gone I reach for my jacket, getting ready to run and warn the Revolutionaries. But when I look up, there are two people blocking the doorway.

  I’ve never seen them before. They’re both men, and both clad in light gray, three-piece suits. They are even built similarly, both very tall and muscular. I clear my throat.

  “Can I help you?”

  “Eliza Hayworth?” The one on the left asks the question. He has a collection of freckles on the right side of his face. “Godmother for the Fairy Godparent division of the Federal Security Branch for the past six years?”

  I nod. “Yes, that’s me… I’m sorry, but who are you?”

  Freckles pulls out a badge and flashes it in my direction. “We’ve been sent by the upper echelon of the main Security Branch. I’m Mr. Jones, and this is my partner, Mr. Jones.” He nods his head to the other man, who remains silent.

  “Okay,” I say, still wary of these strangers. “What do you need, Mr. Jones?”

  They both look at me and I have to tamp down the urge to laugh. I wonder how often these two run into that problem. �
�Um, you Mr. Jones,” I clarify, pointing at Freckles.

  They both move into the room and stand at the head of my desk. I shrink back, momentarily intimidated.

  “We need to ask you some questions about your Godmother trainee: Robin Sun,” says Freckles, looking at me over the desk. A jolt of fear sizzles across my skin, but I stay motionless.

  “Robin? Is everything okay?” I slide an expression of concern over my features. “Did something happen?”

  The other Mr. Jones answers me, and I’m surprised when he speaks: he has a really squeaky voice.

  “We need to know about your interactions with your trainee,” he says. He pulls a notebook from inside his jacket and consults it. “When did you first begin training Ms. Sun?”

  “Um, it would have been a few months ago,” I answer, not sensing any danger in answering this question honestly. Besides, the best lies have sprinkles of truth in them. “I don’t know the exact date though—you’d have to look at the paperwork for that.”

  Jones Number Two nods and writes something in the notebook. Freckles speaks up.

  “Next question. Has your trainee ever had access to classified government information? Specifically, anything regarding Life Chips?”

  Oh crap. I pretend to be puzzled.

  “Anything about the Life Chips? I mean, I told her how to remove them for Wish assignments, but other than that I don’t know. As far as I know, she hasn’t seen anything off-limits. Besides, she doesn’t have access to information that isn’t related to the F.G.O.” I amp up my performance of a concerned mentor, tilting my head while clasping my hands in front of me. “Is she okay? Has Robin done something wrong?”

  Freckles and Jones Number Two look at me with identical, patronizing expressions. “We’ll ask the questions here, Godmother Hayworth,” says Freckles. Jones Number Two asks the last question.

  “Finally: have you ever had any doubts about the system the government has in place regarding death? Specifically, do you think that there is anything wrong with the existence of Life Chips and the Fairy Godparent Organization?”

  Their eyes bore into me, seeking out any deception. But I’m not intimidated any more. I look straight into their eyes and tell the biggest lie I’ve ever told.

  “Not at all, Mr. and Mr. Jones. I think our system is, without a doubt, perfect.”

  *

  The Joneses leave, but I stay in my office to prevent any suspicion. It takes every ounce of willpower I have to not bolt directly to the Revolutionaries, but I’m probably under observation and need to act normally. I continue filling out the paperwork I was working on before Alli and James arrived, acting as if the visit of the investigators was nothing more than an out-of-the-ordinary, unimportant event. But as soon as I finish up my work for the day, I speed out of the Fairy Godparents office and head to the alleyway leading to Revolutionaries headquarters.

  When I get there, I push the dumpster out of the way and crawl through the opening in the brick wall. As soon as I am through the entrance the dumpster slides back of its own accord. I realize, too late, that I am trapped in the building and it is pitch black inside. I curse under my breath. I don’t know where to go from here.

  I desperately try to remember anything I can from the last time Robin brought me here, but nothing significant comes to mind. Finally, just as I’m about to give up, I remember that, when I couldn’t see through the gap in my blindfold, Robin had led me forward into a tunnel leading underground.

  I hope this works.

  I move forward slowly, stretching my arms out on either side. My fingertips find nothing but air for a few moments, and I’m scared that I won’t be able to find my way back. But then, two things happen in quick succession: I feel the edge of a wooden beam with my right hand, and I slam the left side of my face into a rough wall.

  “Son of a bitch,” I mutter the Old World curse that Harrison taught me under my breath. I quickly lean to the side and pat my hand against the wooden surface I just found. I inch toward it—moving more carefully to avoid running into something else—and when I run my hand along its surface I am delighted to find that it’s the side of a doorway. I hook my hand on it and pull forward, and when I stretch my arms out to either side again I feel two stone walls greet my hands.

  Yes! I found the tunnel. When Robin was leading me through a few weeks ago, I remember hearing a click to my left. I move my left hand blindly across the stone surface, and after a minute of prodding I finally locate the switch. The dim lighting in the stone walkway is blinding compared to the complete blackness of a moment ago, and my eyes take a moment to adjust. Once they do, I turn around and am very glad that I paid attention to Robin’s actions when I had been blindfolded.

  The dumpster entrance leads into what is essentially a giant maze. There are various corridors branching off throughout the building, and I see that I must have bumped into one in the darkness. Even if someone managed to find the entrance behind the dumpster, if they didn’t know exactly where they were going in the pitch black building they would become lost, probably for a long time.

  Like I said: I’m glad I was paying attention to Robin.

  After I locate the entrance to the underground caverns I move more quickly. I recall the landmarks I noted when Robin brought me here before, and within moments I’m sprinting. My footsteps echo down the dank, stone corridor, and I pray that I can warn the Revolutionaries in time.

  *

  I burst into the main room. Dozens of pairs of eyes lock onto me while I double over, trying to catch my breath.

  “Eliza?” Someone says my name disbelievingly, and I am relieved to see that it’s Robin. I rush over, but before I can reach her I find my way blocked by Chief Darian and his lackey James.

  “How did you get here, Hayworth?” The Chief’s voice is ice-cold, and I feel a trickle of fear when I take in his expressionless face.

  “How the hell do you think she did, Chief?” James practically spits the question, and my feelings of fear are replaced with annoyance. “She’s a goddamned Fairy spy. She’s probably littered our headquarters with location devices, and is leading a team of government lap dogs here to take us all down!”

  I’ve had enough with James’ unfounded hatred of me. I think of a million things to say to him, like how it was my research that allowed them to unlock the Life Chips, and how I have demonstrated nothing but loyalty and dedication to the Revolutionaries. I think of a million things, but none of them connect with him.

  My fist does.

  A collective gasp rings out as my clenched fist collides with James’ jaw. The unexpectedness of the gesture, combined with the strength I put behind the punch, causes him to reel back and fall to the cold, hard ground of the cave. He looks up in shock and I start yelling.

  “Shut up, you obnoxious, paranoid ass,” I shout over his collapsed form. “For once in your life, could you listen instead of braying whatever idiotic thought pops into your head?”

  I look up, addressing everyone but keeping my gaze on Darian and Robin, who walked over a moment ago.

  “You are all in danger! The high-ranking officials in the Security Branch noticed that Robin’s Chip went offline, and they’re launching a full investigation into the matter.”

  There are a few panicked gasps around the room. Kelly immediately darts over to Robin, whose skin has visibly paled. Darian looks at me while James gets up behind him, and while he looks concerned he keeps his voice level.

  “What have you heard about the investigation?”

  I shake my head. “I don’t know the details—my contacts from the Engineering Department just said that the top tier people know that someone is walking around with an inoperable Chip, and that they’re investigating what happened. I was just interviewed by two Security agents and they were asking me questions about Robin.”

  I look over at Robin, who is being comforted by her girlfriend. I continue, looking back to Darian.

  “For the time being, I think it would be best if
Robin hides out here. If it looks like she disappeared, maybe they’ll assume that she passed away but the death signal didn’t reach government facilities. Plus, if she continues work for the Godparents, they may interrogate her regarding what happened.” I grimace. “I’ve heard that their methods can get really ugly, really fast.”

  Darian nods and looks over to Robin. “Agent Sun, you are hereby removed from field work until such a time that it is deemed safe for you to emerge again. You will be reassigned to work with the computer labs and help our group find a way to permanently deactivate all Life Chips.”

  Robin nods. While she looks saddened by the loss of her undercover position, I can see that Kelly is relieved. She whispers something to Robin while rubbing her back, and Robin smiles at the comment.

  Darian looks back at me, and inclines his head. “Thank you, Hayworth,” he says, and I nod back at him. The moment of panic is gone, and the atmosphere of the room relaxes somewhat. He tilts his head at me.

  “Now that that’s taken care of… How exactly did you find your way to Headquarters by yourself?”

  I feel such relief that Robin will be safe for the time being that I’m lighthearted enough to smirk.

  “You need to get better at blindfolding your guests, Chief.”

  Wish 28

  “Hey, Eliza?”

  Kelly is standing behind me. I’m surprised she left Robin’s side, but when I look over to the undercover pixie I see her talking with Darian. Kelly follows my gaze.

  “She’s getting more information on what her duties will be,” Kelly explains, “now that she’s off of field work.”

  I nod. “Is that what your job is classified as too? Field work?”

  She shrugs her shoulders. “Kind of? I mean, I’m away from the base for what I do, but my job is different from Robin’s. My information gathering is more… passive, while hers is active. She goes out and looks for information, but I stand around and hope information makes its way to me.” She smiles at me, but there seems to be more to it than simple friendliness. I quirk an eyebrow at her.