Buried Sins

by Bolton, Karice

  A few moments of silence passed between us and that’s when I realized what he was telling me. He was leaving me. For some sick and twisted reason, he was leaving me.

  “Do you expect me to just burn the pages of our history and pretend that we never existed?” I asked, my brow arching as fury filled every single cell of my body. “Is that what you want?”

  He hung his head, his fingers pressing against his eyelids as he shook his head. “I don’t know what I’m expecting. I’m trying to keep you safe. Give you a chance at a normal, decent life. I owe you that much after dragging you through what I did.”

  I didn’t recognize this man in front of me any longer. My stomach knotted into a hollow pit of despair with each second that hummed by.

  “I refuse to believe that is truly what you want,” I said. “You were not responsible for what happened. You’ve got to stop blaming yourself. Evil exists in this world, but that doesn’t mean we should crawl in a hole and give up. I never once gave up.”

  His hands fell from his face, and he let out a deep breath and continued shaking his head. There was an iciness to his demeanor. I no longer saw the man I fell in love with. He no longer allowed that person to appear. “I’m not giving up. I’m trying to resolve something that has gotten out of hand. Sometimes we have to face the reality that is presented to us, Hannah. I’m not going to ignore what happened to you. I refuse to pretend that it won’t happen again. I love you too much to put you in harm’s way. I couldn’t protect you. I let you down. I need to stop them. I need to figure out who they are… what they want.” Luke’s words bit at me. “They’ll stop at nothing until they get what they want, and I don’t even know what that is.”

  I felt the tears welling up in my eyes as he stared directly out the window. His jaw muscle twitched, but I saw nothing more.

  “I’ll wait for you. No matter how long it takes. I know this has to be hard on you. I just didn’t realize how hard you took it…” I swallowed down the lump in my throat and tried again. “I’m okay. I’m really okay…”

  “As long as you’re connected to me, you’ll continue to be a target. I’m not going to make it any easier for these people than I already have. There was a reason I stayed away from relationships.” Each word was delivered with precision and coldness. “My parents died because they knew something and someone must think we are somehow a threat. I don’t have a shot at a normal life until I figure out what happened. I refuse to drag anyone I care about through anything else.”

  “How noble of you.” I tried delivering my message with as much callousness as he delivered mine, but my voice cracked, and I looked away to compose myself. “This isn’t the man I fell in love with talking to me. There’s no way he’d leave me like this and he’d at least give me the decency of looking at me when he speaks.” I stood up, pushing the tears away, and stood in front of him. “When the Luke I know and love returns, we can talk. Until then I refuse to take part in this discussion.”

  “I’m doing this because I love you,” he spoke evenly and without emotion.

  I waited until Luke’s eyes connected with mine. Seeing not one ounce of pain reflect back in his eyes was like a knife to the heart. This had nothing to do with his parents or my kidnapping. This was only an excuse. I should have listened to the girls back at Buttons. They always thought Luke felt he was better than all of them, and maybe that was exactly what this was. He saw me as damaged now.

  I felt numb and trapped in a world that held no sanity, but I had to keep it together while I was in front of him. If that was what he thought, I would ensure I did nothing to give him ammunition. I would not let him see me cry.

  I had held in enough tears in my lifetime that holding in a few more wouldn’t kill me.

  “You can see yourself out,” I said quietly, as I walked out of the room and to the stairs. I tried to climb the steps quickly, but my legs failed me. Every step seemed like a climb on the side of Mount Everest, but I needed to be out of his view.

  The sound of the front door opening and closing gave way to a haunting silence.

  “Luke?”

  Nothing.

  I was frozen in the middle of the stairs and stayed motionless for several minutes before the weight of my reality came crashing down around me. What just happened wasn’t logical. It fit no order.

  My knees went weak, and I slid along the wall slowly until I sat on the carpeted step and waited for something I knew wouldn’t happen.

  I waited for Luke to return.

  Luke

  The woman at the car rental counter was very pleasant as she entered my information and took my credit card.

  “You know how to drive a stick?” she asked.

  I nodded.

  “Who doesn’t, right?” she teased.

  It wasn’t until she wrote her cell phone number on the brochure that I fully understood her intentions.

  “If you need a tour guide, give me a call.”

  I was at a loss for words as I took the pamphlet from her and tucked it in my suit jacket.

  “Just go out those doors and turn to your right. Your car is three down on the left.”

  “Thanks,” I muttered, completely exhausted from the flight and horrified by the offer.

  I wheeled my luggage through the automatic doors and made my way to the car. It was one step beyond a compact car, but around Edinburgh that was the sanest option. I shoved my luggage into the backseat and sat in the driver’s seat. I typed in the address of the hotel and waited for my phone to catch up before I turned on the ignition. The rest of the team was scheduled to arrive later in the day.

  Everything about being here felt wrong. I’d left the only woman I’d ever loved in search of something elusive I might never find. I’d left my sister to clean up the mess I’d left behind. It took everything I had not to call Hannah. I missed her so much, my body actually hurt. My mind felt like it was on fire. I regretted leaving, but I knew the damage had already been done. There was no turning back. I bent my neck back and rested my head against the headrest before slapping the car into reverse and then into first.

  I slowed down at the booth and came to a stop. Handing the watchman the contract, he looked it over and walked around the car once before opening the gate. I thanked him and was on my way.

  The voice from the GPS was a happy companion as it fed me directions to the Inn.

  I followed the streets and made my way through the roundabouts. I’d been traveling for only about fifteen minutes when the GPS told me I’d arrived at the destination. The Inn looked as it did online. I pulled directly in front of the stone, four-story building and parked. A wooden sign beside the entrance welcomed visitors in gold script.

  Hannah would love this place. There were window boxes overflowing with flowers and black shutters framed each window. The brass knocker on the bright red door was a solid addition.

  I let out a deep breath and it made me feel no better. I grabbed the luggage and pulled it up the steps. I opened the door and was struck by how lovely the lobby was. I wheeled my luggage behind me to the counter that was tucked in an alcove to the left. There was a grand, wooden staircase to my right. Floral draperies framed the oversized windows, pooling on the wood floors. I tapped the silver bell and an older woman instantly appeared from the room behind the counter. Her dark hair was swept back from her face.

  “Checking in for several nights.”

  “Mr. Fletcher?” she asked.

  I nodded and reached for my wallet.

  “How many keys?”

  “One will be fine.”

  She slid the key across the counter, and I handed her my credit card.

  “Room 304 is where you’ll be staying. Up the stairs to the third floor and four doors down.”

  “Thank you,” I replied, slipping the key into my pocket before putting the credit card back into my wallet.

  “If there’s anything you need, let the front desk know.”

  “I appreciate that.” I smiled at t
he kind woman and picked up my luggage. I walked up the two flights of stairs and followed her instructions, landing at my door.

  I opened it up to find an especially charming room that was perfectly in keeping with the architecture. A king bed was in the center of the room. A sitting area was directly in front of the window and a door to the bathroom was to my right. I set my luggage down and closed the door. A tray was set out with various teas and a bottle of whiskey. I opened the whiskey and poured myself a glass.

  I sat down and took several sips. Turning on the television, I watched the BBC news and attempted to relax. I hadn’t been able to sleep on the plane, and I felt like I was barely holding on. I took another few sips of the whisky and waited for it to numb my world enough to function, but my world slowly slipped away.

  It wasn’t until the phone rang that I awoke with a start. I glanced out the window and saw that it was already dark outside. I scanned the room for the phone and picked it up.

  “Luke. What the hell happened to you?”

  It was Alex.

  “Whisky was my breakfast.”

  “That explains it. I’ve got a location on Viktor.”

  “I’m in 304.”

  “On my way.”

  I sat on the bed and ran my hands over my face attempting to rub the sleep out of my eyes, but I was still exhausted.

  It was a different kind of exhaustion.

  I thought about my parents and the life they’d portrayed. I didn’t understand their motives. I wasn’t sure I ever would, but whatever their reasoning it got them killed.

  I needed to understand what they’d done. What they were willing to do and I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to find that out. I thought about Viktor in all this. Was he someone involved in the robbery? Had he worked with my parents at some point, legitimately or otherwise? I felt like Sam was concealing more from me, but I knew I couldn’t count on him to tell me.

  I glanced at the whisky bottle and thought about having another. I stood up and stretched, watching the television to distract myself from what I really wanted to do, which was make myself forget about everything.

  Especially Hannah.

  But she was why I was here. I wanted to make her life better, safer. I needed to talk to Viktor and find out why he was so determined to destroy our family. If he was after something he thought my family had, he was seriously mistaken.

  A commercial came on for an upcoming special featuring the world’s most valuable treasures and I laughed. Hopefully no one would steal them. My mind wandered to the stolen art. Was that what Viktor was after? Did he believe my parents had it in their possession and therefore I did? It felt more complicated than that. If it were that simple, the message would’ve been as well. But the message from these people had never been simple.

  I took a seat back on the bed and pushed away the craving I had to make my mind forget. I needed to focus. It was the only way I could get back to Hannah. The sooner this mystery was solved, the sooner I could begin living again.

  I closed my eyes and pushed away the desire to drink. Instead, I imagined Viktor in front of me, and the things I would do to him to make him pay for hurting Hannah. My fingers almost tingled with anticipation. I had waited a long time to come face-to-face with the person behind bringing so much pain to my family. I just needed to ensure I got the answers I needed before he met his fate.

  There was a knock at the door, and I walked over to answer it. I looked through the peephole and saw Alex staring back at me. He didn’t look amused. I swung open the door and invited him in.

  “We lost our target.”

  “What do you mean you lost him?”

  “He never made it to his residence.”

  “I thought you had a tail on him,” I questioned.

  “We did, but he got away and he never showed up.”

  “He will. Let’s lie low, and we’ll get him when he least expects it. In the meantime, I’m gonna pour a glass of whisky.”

  Hannah

  Mia shut my door softly, leaving a glass of water and another bowl of soup I had no intention of eating by my bed. I knew she felt responsible somehow, but this wasn’t her fault. This was no one’s fault. People fell out of love all the time.

  But this was different. I hadn’t fallen out of love with Luke.

  I let out a sigh and turned over slowly. My entire body hurt and my mind still swirled with confusion. At first I thought it was all a horrid nightmare that would sort itself out. That maybe the stress of everything had gotten to Luke, which would account for his irrational behavior.

  So I waited a week before calling him.

  His phone had been disconnected.

  Another tear slipped down my cheek as Luke flashed through my mind.

  My stomach twisted as my mind stayed focused on Luke, and I sank deeper into the sheets as I heard Mia shuffling around downstairs. I never imagined this was where I’d be, hiding under a pile of covers.

  Was this what happened to my mom? Just one day things were too much?

  But I had always been strong. I’d never built my world around a guy. I did what was best for my life. I just happened to find someone who I wanted to share my life with, which made me happy. The relationship made me feel stronger. I felt safe.

  And then one of us gave up.

  I let out a sigh with that realization. I missed the last two appointments with Dr. Doro, but I wasn’t up for them. There was nothing to talk about.

  The light hurt my eyes. Everything ached. My head pounded. My legs were sore. My arms didn’t want to cooperate. My fingers could barely tug the sheet over my head. This was the worst kind of pain yet. How could he let two days change the rest of our lives? Why was love not enough? Or did he never love me to begin with?

  I was so angry with him. So angry with myself for letting him have this kind of power over me. Why did I ever let him in?

  I thought back to when I first arrived in California and the overwhelming isolation I felt day in and day out. I was in a place I didn’t belong, in a world I didn’t understand. The loneliness ate at me daily and promised a very sad existence and none of that compared to how I felt now. I wondered what Luke was doing. Did he care? Did he think about me? The last question made me pause. Did it matter one way or another?

  Rolling over in bed, I stretched my arms out under my pillow and took a deep breath in as I thought about what to do with the rest of my life.

  I slowly worked the sheet down over my head and glanced at the bowl of soup. It still didn’t smell appetizing. I heard Mia laughing downstairs and I missed that. Laughter. I wanted to laugh at something. I wanted to remember that there was more going on in my small part of the world than just feeling sorry for myself. But it had only been a week.

  Maybe I needed this week to realize Luke really wasn’t coming back. He’d made a decision and that was that. Well, I could make a decision too. I needed to focus. I needed something to jump into that would take my mind off things.

  I swung my legs over the bed and glanced at myself in the mirror, cringing at what I saw. My blond hair was completely tangled and my skin wasn’t just pale. The hue was sallow and relentless in showing how quickly stress does a person in. I grabbed a pair of yoga pants from the floor and pulled them on. I reached for the lukewarm soup and carried it out of my room.

  I slugged down the stairs and for some reason with every step the sadness was replaced with anger. By the bottom step I was furious. Who did Luke Fletcher think he was? You didn’t mess with someone’s emotions like that, especially not at his age.

  I charged into the kitchen and set the bowl of soup on the breakfast bar. This newfound anger brought my appetite back with a vengeance.

  “Whoa. Look who decided to join the living again.”

  I slurped a spoonful of soup and rolled my eyes.

  “Glad you’re up. I was thinking I’d have to call in reinforcements.”

  “You might want to keep them on speed dial,” I confessed. “I think I’ve j
ust hit the anger stage, but there’s no telling when I’ll revert.”

  Mia gave me a sympathetic smile. “I remember what it’s like to have your heart broken.”

  “Is that why you don’t do relationships?” My brow arched.

  “Partially.”

  “What’s the other part?” I asked.

  “Don’t classes start next week?” Mia asked, ignoring my question as she poured me a glass of milk. It was one of the few things my stomach could handle and my body craved.

  “They started this week.” There was no life to my voice, and I internally scolded myself for how I sounded. How could I let one person do this to me?

  “What?” She walked over to me and reached for my hand. “You will get through this. I’ll be here every step of the way, but you need to get your ass in school.”

  “I know. I already decided that upstairs.”

  “Well, good. Glad I didn’t need to beat some sense into you.”

  “I’m not saying you won’t have to do that too.” I gave a feeble smile and felt the familiar lump in my throat return.

  Damn him! I enjoyed being angry far more than sadness.

  Mia’s expression fell, but she held onto her smile.

  “What?”

  “I just can’t believe my brother did this. It is so hard to see someone you love make the biggest mistake of their life, and I couldn’t do anything about it.”

  “You don’t know if it’s the biggest mistake of his life…”

  Would he view it like that someday? Part of me hoped so.

  “Yes, I do, Hannah. He let fear chase him right out of here and there was nothing either of us could do to convince him to stay.”

  “You can’t force someone to stay in love,” I countered.

  “He never fell out of love with you. He honestly thinks he’s doing what’s best for you. He thinks he’s protecting you and giving you a chance at a life you wouldn’t have with him.”

  “By taking away the chance of having a life with him.”