Ethan's Song

by Jan Carol

  "I can’t accept this, Mr. Ayers." She watched as he took her suitcases to the adjoining room. Staying where she was, she waited for him to return, the door behind her remaining open.

  He was grinning at her when he came back, taking the guitar case from her hand. Pushing the door closed with his free hand, he whispered next to her ear. "No trust today, have you, Jenà?" Slipping his hand around hers, he raised his volume. "You jump back and forth from Mr. Ayers to Ethan. I’d prefer Ethan." He led her toward the bedroom, feeling her hesitation. "I just want to show you around." His voice was full of patience, yet mocking.

  "I still can’t stay here. It isn’t right." She had to be pulled to go with him. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him, which she didn’t, but the luxury the two rooms spoke of was too much.

  "Don’t worry, Miss Wisdom. You will be working for it." He wickedly eyed her. "I guess you could say that you’ll be singing for your supper from now on. But right now, what you need is breakfast and bed." When he had set her guitar on the floor, leaning it against the chair in a corner, he stood behind her.

  "I doubt that my voice, alone anyway, is worth all this juxury." The bedroom was similarly furnished as she remembered his bedroom being, only the colors were coordinated with the adjoining room, and the bed didn’t look like it would move out from under her when she sat on it. She turned to him, not realizing he was so close. Her hands went to his chest on their own accord. "I really can’t, Ethan."

  His eyes burned into hers. "Jenà, you are going to have to learn certain things." Pulling her hands from him, he held them low, behind her, pulling her body to his. "If you are going to refuse my advances, don’t touch me like that. That’s the first."

  Jenà pulled in a quick, strong breath. "I’m sorry. I didn’t mean..." She blushed deeply, but kept her eyes on his.

  "I know you didn’t mean..." He mocked her voice. "That’s why I’m telling you, not acting on it. And two, I enjoy kissing you, and I intend to continue doing so every chance I get." He showed her what he meant, but had to end it too quickly for her. "You are going to have to learn how not to respond so quickly and completely, Jeaá."

  "But I don’t do it on purpose." There was a pout in her tone. She wasn’t sure she wanted to stick around for any more of this embarrassing conversation, but she couldn’t get away from him. "When you kiss me, it’s like you’re asking for all of me and I can’t say no. It’s worse than having a piece of cake in front of your nose. You want it, but you know you shouldn’t take it." She bit her lower lip, knowing she shouldn’t tell him the secret thoughts she had. It all kept coming out of her mouth.

  "I must learn to control my part of it, then." He let her hands go and left her standing there. "In here is your bath." Flipping on the light, but not entering, he let her look from across the room, since she hadn’t moved. "Your closet..." Opening the door and turning on its light, he walked back into the sitting room, motioning for her to follow. "I don’t keep this bar stocked, as these rooms are rarely used. I’d be more than happy to fill it, if..." She shook her head, letting him know she didn’t want him to go to any trouble. "I agree, drinking alone is no fun. This door," he opened the one next to the bar as he spoke, "goes into my suite. Keep it locked at all times." Was that a warning he issued to her? "I have my bar stocked. If you ever feel you want something, just let yourself in."

  "Thanks." She finally spoke to him. "But I’ll pass." She tried the door he had just shut, as she wondered if he thought drinking alone was no fun, who would join him so often that he needed to keep it stocked? She put the lock in place.

  "You’re very tired." He came to her side again. Testing her ability to resist him, he kissed her, getting carried away himself. Backing, he grinned at the subdued look on her face. "We will have to work on that, both of us." He unlocked and opened the door, going into his set of rooms. Within seconds, he was coming back in, finding her in the same place he’d left her standing in. "You didn’t lock it." His tone was low. "An unlocked door is an invitation, Jená. Keep that in mind."

  Jenà was there to lock the door when he was gone again, and she checked the one to the hall also. In the bedroom, she quickly hung the clothes from her suitcase and emptied the overnight case into the dresser. Thinking about a hot shower, how it would do her some good, she stored the empty cases under her hanging clothes and stripped in the large bathroom.

  Coming from the bath, a large soft peach colored towel wrapped around her damp body, she caught her breath at seeing Ethan in her bedroom, a tray of food beside the bed. "I locked both doors." She told him, her voice flat.

  A smile curved on his lips. "I’ve got the keys. Come, sit down and eat breakfast before it gets any colder." Uncovering the many plates and bowls, he stood.

  "If you have a key, why do I have to bother locking them, especially if you’re going to come in any time you please..." She stayed by the door she had just come from. " And I think I would like to dress before breakfast, if you will excuse me."

  "Go right ahead." He made no move to leave her room. "You won’t mind if I start eating while you get into something... less comfortable, will you?" His eyes didn’t leave her.

  Her sigh was quite audible and not sounding very happy. "You didn’t say you were bringing breakfast." As she spoke, she went to the drawers where she’d put away her personal things, deliberately pulling out the lacy cameo top and matching panties. "Had you done so, I would have waited to take my shower." From her closet she took a short, silky robe with which to cover herself.

  He sat waiting for her, an elbow on the chair arm, his fingers resting on his chin, except the index finger, which covered part of his lips, watching as she turned the bathroom light off, left the door partially opened, and walked to the side of her bed. His eyes remained on her as she seated herself comfortably on the edge of it.

  "And that was a show for my benefit?" Her eyes sincerely questioned him, though she was fully aware of his meaning. "Your choice of bed clothes, that slinky robe that doesn’t cover much..." He let his eyes move down her, letting her know how he felt. "You are very determined to tease me?"

  "Tease you, Mr. Ayers?" She asked innocently enough. "May I remind you that first, you insisted that I take these rooms, against my wishes. Second, you insist that I lock the doors, which I did. Third, I was told that I needed to sleep, which was my intention to do. I see no reason to fully dress for five minutes and then pull on my night clothes. Besides," she took a deep breath, continuing, "breakfast is something I rarely eat, since I work most nights, into the wee hours of the morning." Taking a slice of crisp bacon from the plate, she smiled over the tray at him, seeing that his eyes had clouded with almost uncontrollable passion for her. She was teasing him, hoping he wouldn’t come into her room like this again, but she had the feeling it had backfired on her.

  Ethan sat up in the chair, reaching out to pick up a plate. "Each of your points have been taken into consideration." While he buttered a biscuit, he continued with the conversation, his eyes not looking at her any longer. "Where do you work, singing nights, Jenà?"

  "In night clubs, sometimes at parties." Still, his eyes didn’t leave the food in his hand. "I met Wes at one of them, and he’s the reason I’m here. Since I had a very rare cancellation, and this cruise needed extra help, I applied and got the job." Slowly she consumed the slice of bacon, then stood, pulling the covers down.

  "I assume you’ve had enough to eat?" He stood, rolling the cart out of the way.

  "I have. Thank you." She answered sweetly. "I’m sure you are just as tired as I am, and would like to go to your own room?" Sitting on the bed, she pulled her legs onto the mattress, covering them with the crisp, cool sheet. She pulled the tie on her robe, not intending to take it off until he had gone.

  "Not really, Jenà. I would prefer to join you." He sat on the edge of her bed, leaning over her, placing one hand on the other side of her. "It is where you would like me to be, also. Isn’t it?" His voice was very silky, and she closed
her eyes, not wanting to see the lust in his. "What are you holding out for, Jenà?" His question brought her breathing to a stand still.

  Pulling her bottom lip in between her teeth, she was as still as could be. Slowly she resumed her breathing, though not quite as steady as it should have been, and opened her eyes to look at him. "Love." Her simple answer came in a whisper. She expected to hear laughter, but it wasn’t even in his eyes.

  "I can understand that." His words came slowly. "What kind of love? There are many kinds, you know. I can tell you I love you, and honestly mean it. I truly love the things about you that I know. For two hours I listened to you sing. I love your voice. Several times I’ve had the pleasure of kissing you. I do so love the way you kiss me. You have a gorgeous body which screams at me to love you." He leaned toward her a little more. "Is this not the kind of love you want?"

  "No." Jenà’s answer came softly. "It has to be the kind of love that will last longer than three weeks, longer than a year or two."

  Ethan’s lips were playing havoc with her senses as they touched her throat, making their way down inside her robe. "You want me, don’t you Jenà?" His voice held the huskiness of lust.

  "Yes, Ethan. You make me want you. Please leave my room." Her hands pushed at his shoulders. "Please, Ethan." She found herself kissing him as he was kissing her.

  Then he was standing, looking down at her with his brown eyes devouring every inch of her that he could see. "I can’t believe how strong willed you are. Mr. Marx never stood a chance, did he?" He didn’t need to see the shake she gave her head. "Sleep well, sweet angel."

  When she heard the second door close, she got up to lock the one between their rooms. Though he had a key, she would always lock it. How much longer her strong will would hold up to his assaults, she didn’t know. She wasn’t going to invite any more trouble than she already had. Let it come on its own, she knew she couldn’t stop it.

  <<<< >>>>

  ACCORDING TO her watch, it was after four when she woke. Turning on the light, she saw that the cart had been taken away. How tired she had been. Maybe being in the small cabin with Jenni just those three nights had conditioned her to having others around.

  Changing into her chiffon dress, because she remembered his saying that it would do for later, she was thankful the zipper gave her no problems. Clipping her hair back from her face, she wondered where she was going, what she was going to do once she got there. She was his guest now, yet she was going to sing her way through the cruise. That didn’t bother her in the least. She loved it, and really needed to continue every day to keep her voice conditioned.

  Because she didn’t know where to go, she took her guitar out of its case and sat in the front room of her suite. Quietly she began picking through a song, humming along. The words were going through her head, and it wasn’t long before they started coming out vocally, clearly.

  When she finished with the one she was singing, Ethan let her know he was there by clearing his throat slightly. "I could sit and listen to you all night." He stood in the open door between their rooms, which had been closed when she sat down. "In fact, I think that’s exactly what I’ll do." He didn’t move from the spot, even as she laid the instrument down, standing. "Supper is at seven. You can have yours before or after, whichever is to your liking. You’ll be entertaining me. And my guests." The last three words were added as an afterthought, making her believe he didn’t care if they listened or not. She would be only for him.

  "I’d be happy to, Ethan." She said sweetly, bending to put the guitar in its felt-lined case. "Do you think there’s something I could get now? It’s been a long time since I ate anything substantial." Carrying it, she stood in front of him, her blue eyes looking up at his handsome face.

  "I could have a tray made up and sent down while you sing to me, if you would."

  Shrugging her shoulders, she smiled. "That’s fine with me." She let him take the case out of her hands, walking back to the couch beside him.

  He watched her as he unlocked the case, handing the instrument back to her. While she strummed through a few cords, he went into his room, talking to the kitchen on the intercom. When he returned to her room, she looked up and gave him a prize winning smile.

  She motioned with her hand for him to take a chair across from her. "You are welcome to get comfortable." He chose to sit on the couch, close to her. "Were you able to get some sleep? You look rested." He looked rested enough to her.

  "M-m-m." His answer went neither way.

  "Any special requests? I know a few songs." Her fingers fascinated him, as they worked quickly while she talked.

  "I like oldies, about being in love, something like that. I heard you sing a couple of them out on deck. They didn’t seem to be your favorite this morning." He changed his tone, as well as the subject. "How long have you been singing?" His question was impersonal, but it was one way to start getting to know her.

  "Too many years. Since I was about ten, professionally, if I remember correctly. Seems like all my life." She chose some of her favorite songs from the late sixties, singing to him until a loud knock sounded on the door. Ethan got up to answer it, after telling her not to stop the song she was singing. The tray was brought in by Westley.

  Though he spoke no words as he brought the food to the woman, the look in his eyes could have been called hatred, speaking volumes to her. But so short a glance did she make his way, because of the look she saw, she could dismiss it. He would be thinking the worst of her, she knew. If Ethan had talked to him the other night, as she thought he could have done, then she could understand the look. Jenà figured before their cruise ended, she would be ready to yell that she wasn’t going to bed with the boss, as she knew would be in all their thoughts.

  Listening to her thoughts, as she put her guitar down, she took a cleansing breath, getting up to take the chair Ethan had set before the cart.

  "Will you be joining me? Looks like there is enough for several people here." She didn’t hesitate to begin, she was so hungry.

  "No. I’d rather dine later." He bent and kissed her neck softly ."Until seven, then."

  <<<< >>>>

  THE DININGROOM was full when Jenà took her place at the back of the room. Her eyes were mostly on the head table, on the host. As he slowly ate his meal, he kept his eyes on her. It was to him that she sang, and he knew it as well as she.

  When the tables were being cleared, Jenà went out the door, grateful for the guests who detained her employer. She had the feeling she would find him in her room a lot sooner than she wanted.

  Laying on her bed, wearing shorts and a halter top, she held one of the books she had brought with her, awaiting Ethan’s arrival. Had she been kept on the shift work, the books wouldn’t have been opened, she knew now. But as things were, she would probably be searching for more in just a few days.

  But she really wasn’t reading the words that were before her eyes. Her thoughts were on the man who would walk through the door any time. Both doors were locked, as he had warned, and her bedroom door shut. She wasn’t disappointed when she heard the door slam in the outer room, though she wasn’t expecting him to be upset, and he had to have been, or he wouldn’t have been so noisy on entering. Thinking quickly, she had to come up with something. If it was because she had left too soon... She hadn’t waited for her dismissal, but had left because she didn’t want to stick around, feeling an embarrassment at having sang all the love songs especially to him.

  The bedroom door flew open and Ethan stood in the cavity it left. "You weren’t told to leave, Miss Wisdom. I expected you to continue until you were dismissed." She had been right, and she hoped her prevaricated story would calm him. "You will, from now on, stay until further instructions, do you understand?"

  "But..." She whispered, putting a little gravelly sound with it. "I couldn’t continue, and you were so busy with your guests. I didn’t think you would mind."

  "What’s wrong with your voice?" His concern was genuine, thoug
h the anger was still there as he came to the side of her bed. "It sounded great clear through your last song."

  "I felt it coming on. It just happens sometimes. I don’t know if it’s because I sang too much today after not much practice, or if it was something I ate. Was there lemon in anything I had? I’m allergic..." Jenà talked so fast, continuing to fake her pre-laryngitis.

  "I apologize. I had no idea." He sat, putting his hand on her forehead as if he would find a rise in her temperature.

  "Really, I feel fine, it’s just a touch of laryngitis that will probably be gone by morning." She put her fingers on her throat for added emphasis.

  "Don’t talk, you might make it worse." What was making things worse was the way she was feeling about lying to him, but she didn’t want him to be mad at her for something stupid, like walking out on him. "I’ll get the doctor." He stood, walking toward the outer room.

  "Doctor?" Her hoarse voice squeaked some, sounding almost real. "I didn’t know there was one onboard."

  "He’s one of my guests. We couldn’t be out here without one." He had turned in the doorway to answer her. "Now, be quiet. I’ll be back in a few minutes."

  When he was gone, she rolled her eyes to the ceiling. What if the doctor saw that she was faking and said so? What would she do then? Ethan would be more angry about her lying to him than he was about her leaving the diningroom. If she hadn’t started it, she would be bawled out already, finished. She would be left alone, rather than wondering what was going to happen and when.

  It wasn’t long before the two men were walking into her room. First was one she had seen in the diningroom while she was serving, now he was carry a small black bag, one like she had seen doctors carry on television shows. Ethan was right behind him, his concern in his expression, growing more so since he’d left.

  "What’s this I hear?" The doctor set the bag on the bedside table, sitting down on the side of the bed. "Your voice has decided to give us the slip?" He smiled, she just nodded. He reached into the bag, taking out a small flashlight and tongue depressor. "Why don’t you open up and say ah-h-h for me."