The Love and Loss of Joshua James

by Danni Roan

  “Sounds like a pow-wow will be needed tonight,” Joshua said, reaching out to shake the other man’s hand.

  Isadoro Leone smiled, his eyes sparkling in his swarthy face.

  .

  Chapter 18

  “RIDER COMIN’!” BENJI yelled from the roof of the new sod shack where he was laying rolls of grass scooped from the prairie.

  The men on the ground straightened and turned toward the eastern trail, where a lone horseman could be seen kicking up dust as he galloped toward the little compound.

  Billy reached for his pistol while Brion hefted his rifle that rested against the freshly-stacked earthen walls.

  “Ain’t seen no one in months,” Deeks said, ratcheting himself upright with a hand on his back. “Now we got folks poppin’ up ever’ where.” His eyes were sharp and focused as he watched the rider approach.

  Camilla stepped out of the James home with Fiona on her hip as the rider charged into the yard, dragging on the reins of his lean, roan horse, and drawing sideways in surprise.

  “Mr. James?” the rider called in a startled voice as he eyed the young woman with the little girl.

  “I’m here, Stevens,” Joshua replied, stepping away from the other men. “I didn’t expect to see you again.”

  The lean young man stretched out of his saddle toward Joshua and whispered, “Who’s that?” as he cut his eyes toward Camilla suspiciously.

  “That’s a bit of a story,” Joshua said, “but to keep it short, Ms. Camilla and her family joined our party last month.”

  “Ma’am,” Stevens tugged at the brim of his hat politely but pulled his horse around so that it stood between him and her as he dismounted.

  “Mr. Joshua, I done told you I’d stick with you and I come back from that last train ta find you.” Stevens's dark eyes were serious. “If you’d have me, I’d like to make a go of it here.”

  Joshua reached out a large hand, placing it on the younger man’s shoulder. “There have been some changes in plans since we saw you last,” he said, “but if you want to stay, you’re welcome.”

  Stevens beamed and reached out a hand to the other men as they gathered around. “I got some other news, too,” he said after greeting each member, including the Leones. “That old Tucker got hisself caught. Seems he done it again. Just rode off and left another train in the middle of the prairie.”

  “Mio Dio!” Bianca said, looking at the young man. “What happened?”

  “He was leadin’ another train ta Oregon and just up and left them out at the foot of the mountains. A cavalry troop come on ‘em before too long, but they was fit to be tied. Made a report and some of them fella’s set out to find ol’ Tucker.”

  “Couldn’t a’ happened to a nicer fella,” Billy said, snapping his jaws together with disgust. “Low down critter like him should be horse-whipped.”

  “I reckon he’ll be in the pokie a good, long spell,” Stevens said. “I’m just glad they caught him.”

  Supper was a lively meal that night as the group celebrated the incarceration of a man who had abandoned them and caught up on the news from the rest of the country.

  Stevens had brought newspapers but very little else, other than a shy spirit and a willingness to work.

  After supper, Joshua slipped out to watch the sunset over the western horizon. They’d had to explain to Stevens about Bri and his mind turned back to her.

  “Mr. James?” Camilla stepped out to stand beside him. She was holding Fiona, whose curly little head rested on the young woman’s shoulder.

  “Ms. Cammy.” Joshua removed his hat.

  “Do you mind if I watch with you?”

  “No ma’am,” he said quietly.

  For several moments, they stood watching the sinking sun paint the horizon gold and rose as it was chased below the curve of the earth by a darkening sky, two silent silhouettes on an empty earth.

  “You are thinking of her, aren’t you?” Camilla finally spoke.

  Joshua turned but could only see the woman’s outline.

  “Yes ma’am,” he replied.

  “Will you tell me?” She could see the shadowy outline of his chiseled jaw and sensed his pain. “I’d like to know about the woman who gave you these precious girls.”

  Despite the tightness in his chest, Joshua found himself talking about Bridgette. It was a strange relief to speak about the woman he’d loved for years and he found himself pouring out his pain and regret to the young woman who listened patiently as she gently rocked his daughter to sleep.

  As full darkness fell he sighed, feeling as if a heavy weight had fallen from him.

  In the darkness, a soft, warm hand came to rest on his arm, offering comfort and strength.

  DAWN BROUGHT A NEW day and with it, a bustle of activity that so far, the little compound hadn’t seen.

  The men gathered around a table that had once more been set up outside. Each gazed around at the other, wondering why they hadn’t already dispersed to a variety of chores that always demanded their attention.

  “What we got to jaw about now?” Billy sounded truculent despite his age.

  “When Stevens rode in this week,” Joshua began, “he brought with him something that I’ve been waiting for.” He raised his eyes and looked down the table. Everyone was there, though Mrs. Leone stood in the door of Billy’s soddy.

  “Well, spit it out, Josh.” Brion pulled his eyes away from the far hills to study his brother-in-law.

  Joshua smiled. “I got a letter from my brother Jonas down in Texas. He has a big ranch there. I wrote to him a while back asking about cattle. Seems like Wyoming territory is gonna be the next big station for beef, and with all of us men, we could probably get started on it real easy like.”

  He waited while the others thought about it; he’d talked it over with Benji a few times, but no one else.

  “Weell,” Billy said, “cows is as good a crop as any, I reckon.”

  A general round of agreement buzzed through everyone assembled.

  “The question is, is everyone up for it?” Joshua asked. “If so, I was thinking one of us could head south to get things organized, then the rest can go down to bring back a herd and learn the ropes, so to speak.”

  A chuckle broke out at that and the sense of tension lifted.

  “I do not know about cows,” Isadoro spoke, “but I would like to stay here and build something. If it is a ranch, then we will help to build that.” He reached out a hand to his wife, who walked over to him and grasped it in hers.

  “We can learn anything in this new place,” she said smiling, then carefully watched her daughter, whose eyes were studying the countenance of Joshua James.

  “Then it is decided,” Joshua spoke cautiously, watching the other men. “We’ll try our hand at raising cattle.”

  “In the meantime, we’d better git the chores done or we’ll be wonderin’ where our next meal is comin’ from,” Billy said, pushing his chair back.

  The rest of the men stood and began preparing for the day’s work when Katie piped up.

  “Pa are we gonna have cows?” she asked.

  “Yes, that’s what we were just talking about,” Joshua replied.

  “I like cows, they sound funny,” his daughter said cheerfully.

  “Cow says Mooooo!” Meg spoke up from where she was watching a butterfly flit about, making everyone laugh and when she did it again, they laughed even harder, making her giggle in turn.

  Joshua scooped up his little girl, swinging her around and making her wild red hair fly. “Yes Meg, cows say moo.” He chuckled as the little girl threw her arms around his neck and squeezed him tight.

  “You wanna ride out with me today and see if we can find us some quail?” he asked Meg.

  “I go with Uncle Brion,” Meg responded, surprising him. “You take Katie an’ Cammy can keep Fiona.”

  Joshua smiled. “We’d better ask her if that’s all right with her first,” Joshua said, setting the squirming four-year-old down.
/>
  “Miss Cammy!” she called excitedly, “will you watch Fiona while me an’ Pa go huntin’?” she rested a little hand on a hip and tilted her head, looking up at the dark-haired woman.

  “I’d be glad to,” Cammy spoke, her eyes once more straying to Joshua. “You bring us home some nice prairie chickens and Mama and I will cook them up for supper.”

  “And cookies too?” Meg questioned.

  Cammy bent down, tapping the little girl on the nose. “I’ll see what I can do,” she said and laughed as Meg leaned forward, kissing her on the cheek.

  “You’re sweet,” she said, then bounded away to her uncle.

  Joshua turned to see the young woman smiling brightly as his daughter scampered away. The sun glinted off her dark hair and her dark coffee eyes sparkled. She was pretty. A guilty knot tightened in his gut and he dipped his head.

  He had no right to think any woman was pretty. He’d already been the doom of one. Setting his jaw, he adjusted his hat on his head and strode purposefully to the barn.

  “I’m comin’ Pa,” Katie called, skipping behind him. “You promised to teach me to saddle,” she chided, slipping her hand into his.

  “You’ll be runnin’ this place pretty soon,” Joshua smiled, noting how her hair had been neatly braided this morning.

  A few minutes later he swung up in the saddle, reached down to pull Katie up behind him, and followed Brion out into the open prairie.

  “You girls keep your eyes peeled,” Brion spoke, as he pushed his horse into a trot.

  “You all right with this cattle business?” Josh asked as they rode through the deep grass along the stream.

  “Aye, it’s a good plan. You an’ these girls can have a good home and a new start here.”

  “We’ll have to do some plannin’ to make things permanent like. Shore the place up.”

  “You gonna build a proper house?”

  “I think it would be best for the girls, but it might take some time.”

  “Mr. Leone seems to see something in this place. Sees a future.”

  “Don’t you?”

  “Aye, but my path might lead a different direction I can’t tell yet.” Although Brion had been back for several weeks, he had not told Joshua about Wynonna. He’d decided to wait and see if the woman returned to him or not.

  “Life seems to have a way of taking us where we don’t always expect,” Joshua said sadly.

  “There, Pa,” Katie spoke, pointing along the stream to where the grass wavered slightly.

  Joshua and Brion slid from their horses and stalked forward until they could make out a small group of large birds.

  Brion grinned and raised his rifle, waiting for Joshua to do the same. It would be nice to have prairie chicken for dinner.

  Chapter 19

  “GRANDPA?” ERIC’S RUMBLING voice interrupted his grandfather’s story. “If you were still grieving over Bridgette, how come you were able to marry Ms. Cammy?”

  The young man looked confused, and Joshua laughed, laying a gnarled and age-spotted hand over Eric’s. “Son, someday soon you’ll understand that the human heart has no limits to its ability to love. Cammy, she was somethin’ else that I never expected.”

  He turned his faded blue eyes to his grandson. “Reckon you’ll find out soon, too,” he said smiling.

  Eric blushed red to the roots of his dark blonde hair. “Grandpa,” he whispered looking shy.

  “When’s she comin’, anyhow?” Joshua asked, a twinkle in his eye.

  “Me and Ma are goin’ to fetch her tomorrow.”

  “Your Pa going?”

  “No, he said he didn’t want to scare her off with too many folks all at once, and besides, we wouldn’t all fit on the wagon bench.”

  Joshua gave a bark of laughter. “Your Pa’s a wise man.”

  “Does everyone know?” Eric asked, looking out across the ranch yard. He hadn’t announced that he had a mail-order bride coming, but he was sure that everyone must know.

  “Well the adults, the children will just have to meet her when she gets here.”

  Eric ran a hand through his close-cropped hair nervously.

  “You worried she’ll be ugly?” Joshua asked bluntly.

  “No!” Eric nearly shouted, then shook his head as Joshua laughed.

  “What’s wrong then? Your ma will know what to say when you meet her.”

  “It’s just I don’t know no woman ‘sept family and I’m such a big, awkward fella...” his voice faded away, as he leaned on his elbows and studied his boots.

  “Son, you’re a fine, upstanding young man. Maybe you stand up a little taller than some, but any woman would be lucky to have you as her husband.” He rested a shaky hand on Eric’s shoulder. “You just be the best you, you know-how. You’re young, son, you got lots of time to figure it out.”

  Eric smiled, looking at his grandfather. “Did it take you a long time to figure it out?”

  “Who says I got it figured out now?” Joshua laughed. “I think Cammy had me figured out, though.”

  His mind went back to when Fiona wasn’t even one-year-old, let alone a mother with a grown son of her own.

  WYOMING TERRITORY

  June 1869

  “CAN I WALK WITH YOU, Mr. James?” Cammy stepped through the door of Billy’s soddy, drying her hands on a dishtowel. Supper was over and the women had done the washing up.

  “Most certainly,” Joshua agreed. The young woman had been walking with him most evenings for the past few weeks, sometimes simply admiring the embers of a setting sun or talking about daily activities and the plans for the ranch.

  “You and Papa have been doing a good deal of planning lately,” she commented, hooking her hands behind her back.

  “Your Pa has some big ideas on how to make this place more permanent.”

  Cammy laughed, a soft titter in the darkening night. “My Papa loves building things. He is very talented and can see how something could be before it is built.”

  “I’m coming to understand that,” Joshua agreed.

  “What do you want to do first?”

  “I think we’ll need a bigger and better barn if we’re to bring the cattle along.” He studied the ground where they were walking. “We’ll need someplace to keep the horses and I’m hoping to get a couple of milk cows at the same time. The girls are growing and with so many of us, Billy’s goat can’t be expected to produce that much.”

  “Yes, that is a good idea.”

  “I’ve been meaning to thank you and your mother for looking after the girls so well,” Joshua spoke again. “You’ve been very kind.”

  Cammy laughed again. “Your girls are special,” she said, shaking her head a bit.

  “What have they done now?” Joshua asked, studying her. He could tell she had more to say.

  “I was just thinking about Katie. She’s so independent and seems to think it’s her duty to look after you and her sisters. I suppose being the oldest, this is normal.”

  “She does like to go with me when we do any work. The other day I noticed she had a scrape on her knee and she’d never said a word. Seems the saddle skirt was rubbing it and she never once complained.”

  “Perhaps if she is to ride with you so much, she could wear something else.”

  “I don’t have anything else for her.”

  “Would you mind if I made her a few new dresses and an outfit for riding?” Cammy looked up at him, the crimson light on the horizon reaching out to set his face ablaze.

  “That would be very kind.” His voice seemed tight in his throat, as her dark eyes raked his features.

  There was something so open about this woman. He turned, putting the thought behind him.

  “We’d better get back,” he said, heading toward the pale light of a lantern that filtered through a chink in his door.

  “I just want you to know, Joshua,” Cammy spoke, resting her hand on his arm and stopping him in his tracks, “that I have come to love your girls very much.”

/>   “I know,” he whispered awkwardly, looking anywhere but at her. “You are kind.”

  “WHERE’S CAMMY?” ISADORO asked, washing up as he prepared for bed.

  “She is walking with Mr. James,” Bianca replied.

  “It’s good she has made friends.”

  Bianca laughed. “My heart, you do not understand.”

  “What?” Isadoro turned toward the bed, carefully unbuttoning his shirt and hanging it on a peg.

  “She is very much interested in something more than friendship with our Mr. Joshua James.”

  Isadoro Leone froze, his shirt suspended just above the peg set in the wall, as he blinked at his wife.

  She grinned wickedly at him, pulling the pins from her hair. “Some women like tall men with light hair and pale eyes.” She shrugged, still smiling.

  “Me, I like my men dark, handsome and well-muscled.” She took the shirt from his hand and carefully hooked it over the peg as she traced a finger along his arm, then pulled the rest of the pins from her hair, letting it cascade around her.

  Late into the night, Isadoro lay awake staring up into the sod ceiling while his life lay sound asleep curled up next to him. He hadn’t even thought of Cammy being interested in Mr. James when they’d decided to stay.

  He wondered how he’d missed the signs. He wondered if the young widower would be able to love Cammy in return. His heart squeezed with fear and doubt as he turned to study the small cot he’d built for his daughter after the night of the snake.

  Isadoro could just make out his daughter’s shadow in the darkroom. She’d come to bed much later than he thought was appropriate, now that he had this new information. He would be careful to watch and see what happened next.

  “WHAT DO YOU THINK, Stevens?” Joshua asked. “Would you ride down to Texas and get things in order? My brother would welcome you, I’m sure.”

  “I’d be pleased to, Mr. Joshua. I’ve been beatin’ the trails long enough that I don’t mind headin’ out again.”