Deepest Desire

by Weston Parker

  "Hey. Calm down. I'm in the country right now, but I'll get an Uber and be there in a few seconds."

  "Alright. Hurry okay? I'm scared. I can't get a hold of Doug. He was at the frat house last night and shit, but-"

  "Hey. It's okay. We'll figure it out. Just stay put. I'll be there soon." I glanced up to see a black Cadillac pull into the driveway. "Gotta go. Love you."

  I dropped the call and wrapped my arms around my chest, praying like hell someone had gotten lost. I really wasn't that lucky though.

  The back door to the car opened and a deep voice called out. "Grace. Get in. I'll give you a ride home, Kitten."

  I walked to the door and leaned down, Erik's father sitting in the back, looking like the devil himself. "I'm good. Honestly."

  "It wasn't a request." He patted the seat next to him, and I glanced back at the house.

  He didn't want me with Erik. Maybe he'd set down an ultimatum, and Erik broke it.

  Maybe this was my warning.

  Or maybe it was my death.

  Chapter 21

  Erik

  Fuck me. Seeing her in my kitchen making breakfast was over the top. I rode in silence next to Kane, trying to pull myself together. I was a mess over walking or not walking, as if I had a choice in the matter.

  I'd use her body every chance I got and ignore how badly I wanted her heart.

  You already have it. I snorted.

  "Something funny, man?" Kane glanced over at me, his dark eyes filled with mischief.

  "No. I just wish things could be different with me and Grace."

  "The hot librarian you're bonking?"

  "That's the one." I glanced out the window and unbuckled. "Why the fuck are we at NYU? Certainly, my father doesn't expect us to kill some kid on campus, right?"

  "He does." Kane unbuckled and got out of the car, looking at me over the top of it. "What's the deal with this broad? She's more than sex, obviously."

  "She's nothing more than sex." I reached back and positioned my gun in the back of my slacks under my coat. "She wants more, but all women do."

  "Not the girls I hang with. They want a dick in the ass and a few bills on the table." He laughed and pointed to the Sigma frat house in the distance. "We're headed there."

  "Alright. Point out who we're taking out, and I'll do it."

  "I know you will." He tapped his side. "I forgot my fucking silencer again."

  "You do that shit on purpose." I shook my head and walked toward the building as a group of guys walked out. Thomas, Grace's brother, was one of them. "Interesting."

  I glanced back and watched the prick walk toward the library. She was close to her brother, and yet all I'd heard was what an asshat he was.

  "What's interesting?" Kane glanced back, turning in a full circle as if he were missing something.

  "That's Grace's older brother. Nate had some trouble with the kid when he started dating Jenna. Seems the preppy fucker wanted to get in Jenna's panties." I reached for the door, opening it and moving back. "You know we look like hitmen."

  "I know. It's awesome." He walked into the house and moved toward the stairs. "He's the last door on the left upstairs. His name is Doug."

  "Good. If we were killing Grace's brother, I'd like to tell her first." I chuckled and ran past Kane, taking two stairs at a time.

  "That would be so fucked up, right?" He laughed and walked down the hall. "What if I told you he was the last one on the list?"

  "I'd tell you to suck a dick." I walked down the hall, pausing outside the guy’s door. Sounded like he was busy with someone who thought he was a god from the sound of things.

  "You telling me you would choose this girl over a hit your father sent us on?" He smiled and pressed his hand to the bedroom door.

  "No. I'm telling you to drop it." I pulled my gun from behind my back and knocked on the door as a wicked smile lifted my lip. I loved my job. A part of me would always be a killer. Grace wouldn't understand that, and I honestly couldn't care. It was who I was raised to be.

  "Go away," a deep voice called out, strained.

  "Sorry. I'm on a tight schedule." I opened the door and walked in to find a big football motherfucker pumping his cock in a little guy's ass.

  "Hey! What the fuck. Get out." The big guy turned and barreled toward us, his body thick and hairy.

  I lifted my gun. "Sorry to bother your morning fuck, but we have business to take care of."

  "Oh my God." The smaller guy turned and crumbled to the floor, searching for his pants from what I could tell. "Please don't hurt me. I didn't do anything."

  "You know this guy?" The bigger guy, whom I assumed was Doug turned to his partner. "How?"

  "Well, I'm not shoving my cock in his ass if that's what you're asking." I glanced back at Kane. "Close the door and stand watch."

  "Got it, boss." He slipped out and closed the door as Doug growled loudly.

  "Who the fuck do you think you are?"

  His friend stood up, shaking. "He's Erik Bertinelli, man. Don't you know anything?"

  "Who?" He turned his attention back to me, the fucker still fully naked, which was starting to gross me the fuck out.

  I turned my gun on his friend and shot him, the thin kid crumbling to the ground. "You borrowed some money from one of your professors."

  The kid started to piss. "Oh my God." He backed up and pressed his back against the wall. "Are you the asshole that killed Billy?"

  I nodded and let my hands hang beside me as if I were done for a moment. "Yeah, well, you twats stole the money from the wrong business."

  He lifted his hand in the air. "I didn't know. We didn't know. Fuck man. I'll get the money back. The guy we originally borrowed it from is my boyfriend."

  "Oh yeah?" I glanced down at the smaller guy dead on the floor. "What about this poor bastard?"

  "Just a quick release." He cupped his dick, suddenly seeming to realize that he was naked. "Let me fix this."

  "You have the money? Now?"

  "What? No. Of course not. We stole it because we had no other choice."

  "There's always a choice." I lifted my gun. "How about this. Just tell me who the other guy involved was and we'll kill him instead. It was you, Billy and some other guy that wore his mask a little better than you two fuckers."

  "Thomas. It was Thomas Adams. He just left here. He's the president of this place. Kill him instead, or fuck, he might have the money. His Dad used to be fucking loaded." He ran his fingers through his hair and let out a sigh that sounded like relief.

  Sickness filled my insides. Fuck. It was Grace's brother. My father wasn't going to stop hunting these idiots until we recouped the money, or they were all dead.

  I lifted my gun. "Asshole. What kind of friend are you?" I shot him before he could answer and turned. What the fuck was I going to do?

  Call Grace and tell her to get her brother and run as fast and as far as they could? Then I would be hunting them both. I had to warn her though.

  Love beckoned me to do something. Fuck. I was in love with her. There was no denying it, but to defy my father meant death for all of us involved.

  That answer didn't work either.

  I opened the door and walked out into the hallway as my heart beat hard in my chest. "Alright. It's done."

  "Hey. You okay?" Kane gripped my shoulder, squeezing as we walked back down the hall and jogged out the front door toward the car.

  "Yeah. No. Fuck, I don't know. I'm not talking about it." I got in the car and leaned back, closing my eyes. "I just need a break from everything."

  "From killing?" He chuckled. "Good luck with that one."

  "Yeah, fuck you too."

  ***

  I got in my car the minute we got back to my father's place and drove out to my house. Some part of me hoped that Grace would defy me and be at the house, curled up in the bed or reading on the couch. Only the scent of her perfume and the breakfast she'd cooked that morning remained.

  "Dammit." I walked to the bedroo
m and sat down on the side of the bed, noticing that my box of pictures was sitting on the floor. Had she gone through my stuff? Where I should have been pissed, I wasn't. I wanted to know what she thought, what she felt.

  Dropping back on the bed, I let out a long groan and covered my face with my hands. What the fuck was I going to do?

  Kill her brother and not say a damn thing about it to her? It was so much like Nate and Jenna's situation that it seemed fate was playing games with us.

  Maybe there was a way to talk to my father and see if we could use Thomas to complete a task or a hit for us. Maybe we could turn his ass into a slave who ran errands for us. Anything was better than killing the prick.

  "How do I get myself into these bullshit situations? First Jenna and now this?" I sat up and let out a long sigh before grabbing for my phone. I had to find out where she was.

  I tracked her phone and found her moving slowly by the river outside of my father's place.

  "What the hell?" I stood up and called her phone, the damn thing ringing a million times and going to voice mail. "What are you doing on my side of town, Grace?"

  I called again. And again. And again.

  Grabbing my keys to the motorcycle, I jogged out of the house and tried to ignore the horrible thoughts dancing through my skull. Someone had her. My father? No. He wanted her out of my life, but he'd never hurt her. He loved me too much.

  Right? Fuck.

  My phone buzzed, and I answered it. "Grace?"

  "No, lover boy. It's Cole."

  "I don't have time for your shit right now. I can't find Grace."

  "I'm aware. Her brother just called in a panic because she should have been home hours ago." He cleared his throat as I got on the bike. "You wanna explain how you're connected to him?"

  "Did he mention me?" I reached back to grab my helmet.

  "No, but he lost a friend last week, and he's freaking out over another one not answering his phone."

  "Is this what you cops do? Just dig around in bullshit until you find something worthy of picking apart?" I laughed. "My father might have you as part of the syndicate, but I have no problem putting a bullet in your skull and dropping you in the woods, Cole. Don't mistake me for a friend. It would be detrimental to you."

  "You don't scare me, Erik, but I will tell you this. Thomas was the third member of the boys that stole from your father. You're going to have to put a bullet in his head, or your father's going to put one in yours."

  "Why do you care?"

  "Because I have nothing better to do. You need to walk away from her."

  "I will. Right after I find her."

  "Alright man, but you're playing with fire."

  "Fuck you too, pig." I hung up the phone and closed my eyes as my heart ached. Why did Cole care? And where the fuck was Nate in all of this shit? Maybe he could off Thomas so I wouldn't have to. "No," I growled. It was my job, and nothing was coming in between me and what was expected of me. Not Cole. Not Thomas.

  Not even my pretty little sex kitten.

  The phone buzzed, and I glanced down. Grace. How? My number was unlisted.

  "Erik."

  "Grace. Where the fuck are you, baby?"

  "I'm at home."

  "No, you're not."

  "I need you to leave me alone from here on out. I honestly don't want anything to do with you."

  "I don't care what you want. You know how this works."

  Her voice broke. "And that's the life you want for me? To be used by a depraved bastard that could care less about me? I've spent my whole life protecting myself from the very things you're doing to me."

  "I would never hurt you. You know that."

  "You're hurting me now."

  "Grace." My stomach turned, and my hands shook. "You're not running from me. It's not happening until I'm ready to let it happen."

  The voice on the phone next sent a shock wave through me. My father.

  "Meet me at the mansion tomorrow. This is your last warning, son."

  The phone clicked off, and rage consumed me. "No! Fuck no." I started the bike and drove like my ass was on fire until I reached the house. My father's car was gone, but his guards were mingling around like they were playing poker.

  "Where is he?" I bellowed and started swinging as they moved toward me, trying to calm me down. I made my way through most of them, but finally one threw a punch perfectly, and the lights went out.

  Good. I was getting fucking tired anyway.

  Chapter 22

  Two Weeks Later

  Grace

  I'd hadn't slept well since the situation with Erik a few weeks before. His father bringing me home and forcing me to tell Erik to stay away from me. He was a stubborn bastard, and when my pleas hadn't worked, he'd snatched the phone from me.

  A shiver ran through me as I stood in the small kitchen in my apartment. Sadness wrapped around me, and it was hard to breathe, but I would get past it. Jenna and Nate kept promising that it would get better and that if nothing else, they would watch out for Erik.

  Nate wouldn't give me much on him every time I asked, and he'd stopped coming to the library which hurt on so many different levels.

  "You want me to make you some breakfast." My brother's voice lifted from behind me, pulling me from my thoughts.

  I turned to see him wiping at his eyes, his hair a mess. "No. I'm going up to the library for a little while."

  "I thought the event was at seven tonight." He yawned and lifted his arms into the air. "Why do you need to go up there now? Seems like you guys have everything ready for tonight, right?"

  "Yeah, but I just want to double check everything." I turned back to the coffee pot and held my breath. Thomas didn't know about Erik and me, nor would he ever.

  "We're having a big toga party tonight at the Sigma house. We need to do something fun to get everyone's minds off finals and losing Billy and Doug."

  "You think it's safe to go back there?" I glanced over my shoulder.

  "I can't live here forever."

  "Right, but maybe you should talk to someone about protection."

  "Like condoms?" He chuckled and left me in the kitchen alone. My brother had fucked up royally by stealing the twenty-grand back from the check cashing place a few weeks before. Where Billy's death looked like a freak situation, now that Doug and his boyfriend were dead, it was more than obvious that someone was after them.

  I wasn't sure how reliable Cole was, but he seemed to be the only person I knew at the police station. I needed to stop by before going to the library event or maybe on my way home from checking on everything.

  "You want to go with me up to the library?" I finished fixing my coffee and grabbed my keys. "It might be good for you to get out of here for a little while."

  "Nope. I'm fine. Everything is dying down, I promise. Either way, I'll have the twenty grand from Dad by the middle of next week. If someone comes after me like they did Billy and Doug, I'll be safe. They don't want my death, Grace. They want their fucking money."

  "I don't like it." I stood at the opening to the living room and watched my brother. "Please be careful."

  "I will. There's this cop guy that I talked to a few weeks ago. He's been keeping tabs on me. It's going to be fine."

  "Alright." I turned and left the apartment, not feeling any better at all.

  It was too pretty of a day to drive to the library, so I decided to walk instead. Everywhere I looked I would see something that reminded me of Erik. My mood had completely turned to shit by the time I walked up the long flight of stairs to the library and walked in. I just wanted to see him. Just once. Even if it meant he were on the third-floor reading and ignoring me. To simply know that he was okay would be enough.

  If I were braver, I would have gone out to the Bertinelli mansion and knocked on the front door, but I wasn't. I was just me. Mousy, lame, plain.

  "Great job on the decorations, Grace. This is honestly the best this place has ever looked." Nelly's comment surprised me. The ol
d goat usually had nothing but criticism to hand out. She reached out and touched my hand. "I know it's none of my business, and I honestly don't want it to be, but your boyfriend showed up this morning. He's on the third floor somewhere."

  My heart jumped in my chest. "He did?"

  "Yes." Her grimace melted into a smile. "And if you'd like to invite him to the event tonight, I can get you an extra ticket."

  "Why are you being so nice?" I glanced around. "Am I being punked?"

  "No, child. I just hate seeing you so gloomy. It's depressing." She shrugged and walked to the reference desk. "Just make sure you're here on time tonight and that you're accessible through the whole evening."

  "Of course." I turned and jogged up the first two flights of stairs and stopped. What the hell was I going to say to him? I couldn't catch my breath and felt like a complete idiot. Instead of heading up to the third floor, I ducked in between two huge bookshelves on the second floor and knelt down as if looking at a book.

  I had to catch my breath first. If he rejected me or ignored me, I would be crushed. Maybe the best option would be to go back downstairs and do nothing. Not go near him at all.

  Every cell in my body screamed in protest as I got up and turned to walk back down to the first floor. I loved him. I needed to see that he was okay. Even if he ignored me completely, at least I would know that he was alive and well, that his father hadn't shot off one of his arms or something.

  The nightmares I'd entertained over the last two weeks were enough to suffocate most people.

  "Just go. Walk by, check him out and speak if he speaks." I turned and walked slowly up the stairs, wishing like hell I had a few books in my hands. It would have felt better to at least look busy.

  I scanned the third floor, not finding him anywhere. My heart fell as I walked through the last bookshelf on the floor and paused at the edge. He stood by the window, a book in his hands, but his eyes lifted toward the sun. His jeans hugged his waist and outlined his perfect ass so beautifully. The thick muscles of his arms and shoulders pressed against the thin blue t-shirt he wore, and his hair was dark and disheveled, as if someone had just run their fingers through it.