BWWM: BEFORE I WAKE: A Bad Boy Billionaire Book Collection (African American Interracial Series)

by Scribble XO Books

  As he pulled back and looked into my eyes today, I could see something more there. It was another thing I’ve been picking up on lately…he wants more. I can feel it down to my core. My fantasies aren’t just mine it seems. The chemistry is undeniable sure…but I’m just not ready to cross that line. We still have a lot of work to do and I still have a daughter to raise.

  “You ready?”

  “Yeah,” he grinned.

  I prepped the rig, trying my best to concentrate but I couldfeelhis eyes on me. Those weren’t the only things I wanted on me. Gah!Focus!

  “It’s kinda hot in here. Can I take off my shirt?” His voice was casual but his real intentions were just under the surface of his words.

  I shook my head. He’s really something. “No, you cannot.” I scolded. “I’m the boss here so...”

  “Oh, I’m sorry. You go ahead…”

  Confused, I turned to face him. “Go ahead and do what?”

  “I thoughtyou wanted to take off my shirt… You’re right, yeah. It’s probably best you do it. I’m feeling a little weak today...” He feigned exhaustion but I saw the mischievous smirk hidden at the corner of his lips.

  “Jack! I am not taking my shirt off and neither are you. Mr. Lucas and Ms. Betty are around today! They’re seventy years old. Now what if they saw you hobbling around here looking all sexy without your shirt? It might kill them!”

  His gaze was suddenly intense. “You think I’m sexy, Amara?”

  The air left the room. “I… I have other clients today. We need to get on with this.” I sputtered, pushing down the flutters in my chest.

  His gaze remained intense but I saw a hint of playfulness. “Do you cheat on me with other patients…?”

  “That’ll be enough of that,” I told him, stepping back with a laugh. “Come on let’s go, grab the bars.”

  He grinned, but did what I asked him. He knew exactly how he was affecting me. I’m a terrible actress, especially when my body is doing things of its own accord.

  “Okay,” he said, gripping the bars. I didn’t miss the way his biceps bulged against his cotton shirt. The cords in his forearms rippled as he made in his way across the parallel bars.

  “Just keep in mind that if I faint in this stuffy room you’re obligated bylaw to give me mouth to mouth...”

  “Jackson! Watch where you’re going!”

  He chuckled again and paused on the rig. “What straight? I can do this with my eyes closed! I’ll bet you I can make it all the way to the end today with no hands and no breaks.”

  He hadn’t done much weight-bearing yet. I wasn’t sure he was up to it, but he sounded confident and he’d had enough time to heal so it was worth a try.

  “Okay, show me,” I said with a nod to the other end.

  “Eh, I’ll need a little incentive,” he said, casually. Much too casually.

  “Incentive?” I said, quirking an eyebrow.

  “Yeah, like a reward if I make it.”

  I shook my head again and said, “What? More candy corn?”

  “Nope. Something sweeter... I’ll need... a kiss.” He focused those blue eyes on my face and waited for my reaction. The challenge had been thrown down. I did my best to look unenthused.

  “Fine, whatever it takes to get you to do some work today.”

  “Whatever? Wait…can I change the terms then?”

  I couldn’t help myself. I laughed. “No, you cannot! Come on, you’re stalling.”

  One more killer smile and then he was all business. The fact that he was a born competitor was evident in the determination that was etched into his face. He started out slowly, still gripping the bars with his first step. I was quiet…not wanting to break his concentration.

  I watched almost nervously as he let go and began to walk. I was so excited for him that it was hard not to clap and cheer as he made it to his third step…and then his fourth…when he took that last step and grabbed onto the bars at the end, I could see just a touch of pain in his face. But the triumph was also there. He’d made it.

  “That was amazing, Jack! I’m so proud of you!” And I really was - exhilarated even! What progress!

  He stood still and watched me. In his eyes was a look I was all too familiar with. It had been reflected back at me every time I got up in the middle of the night to freshen up after thinking about him.Longing.

  I quickly glanced around. No one.

  Stepping up on my toes, I leaned up to him but paused. He didn’t budge, seemingly content to let me make the first move. He smelled so good this close - like shampoo and sunshine.

  I brushed my lips gently against his. God…they formed snugly against mine as I had always imagined they would. He leaned into the kiss, his nose brushing mine but he didn’t make any move to deepen it. I was surprised and... annoyed. I needed so much more than this innocent peck.

  I tilted my head and adjusted the kiss as my head swam dizzy from being so close to his powerful chest. I swayed forward and afraid that I would fall over him, I caught my hand against his body. Huge mistake. I felt the ripple of his defined abs billow with his sharp intake of breath as he moaned into my mouth. My touch was enough to fuel the fire.

  Jackson pulled me up into him and the slight stubble across his jaw tickled my skin deliciously as that tongue I’d dreamt about so many times parted my lips and slipped inside. Fireworks exploded in my head as our tongues danced and he explored my mouth like it was hidden treasure. He tasted like a sweet candy. I had to stop this before it got totally out of control.

  “Okay then, moving on…” I pressed my lips as I turned away. They burned from our touch. Oh boy. How did I let that happen?

  JACKSON

  “Had he thrown his weight around, you’d have been snapped in half!”

  I’m listening to Aaron Christie, “the baby faced killer”, a goofy Scottish rookie who’d recently became an MMA sensation. As the youngest fighter ever in the heavyweight division, he had the fiercest fighting style I’d ever seen. The ironic thing was that he was funny and dare I saykind outside the cage. But I’ve never - in my entire career seen someone fight with the kind of crazy abandon that he did.

  I had come to The Bayside Brawlers a Venice beach training facility to meet with the owner Santos. Santos was not only Aaron’s head trainer but he had coached quite a few other heavyweight fighters who’d quickly risen to fame. He was just the man I needed to spearhead my comeback.

  I was happy to see Santos’s heavily tattooed arms and legs appear around the corner, anything to get me out of this conversation about my last fight. It was bad enough that I was standing in a new gym.

  Although he was approachable, Santos was a brick house, standing over six-five, with long stringy hair. He was a legend and rumors had been whispered for years that he used to battle in unsanctioned fights in the alleyways of Mexico City - fight club style. His name and reputation carried a lot of weight here. And with the way Aaron shuffled away quickly, so did his presence too. He motioned me towards his back office.

  “Jackson, Jackson, Jackson.” My name hovered in the air as he took a seat on a worn leather couch across from me.

  “May’s not too far away.” I saw him glance down at my brace. I’m sure he could see that I still walked favoring my other leg.

  “Trust me I’ll be ready. It’s my natural weight class, there’s nothing stopping me from getting back in the cage and....”

  “Nothing?” His eyebrow quirked towards my knee again.

  “I’ve been in therapy since August and things are going well. I’ve been lifting at home and by the holidays I can box. It’s only November. Give me a few weeks and I’ll be ready. I… I can do this.”

  He studied my face for a long time. He’s not going to bite. I started to feel self-conscious. He was going to make me sweat.

  “Why now? What are you not telling me?” His eyes didn’t flinch.

  “Don. He paid off fights.” I felt ashamed even saying his name.

  “So now you got s
omething to prove?”

  “Fuck yeah.”

  “Then no.” My heart stopped.

  “What do you meanno?”

  “I’m not about that revenge, amigo. I get it I get it, this is your big chance to settle the score, prove that you’ve really got the balls. But revenge fighting? No. I’ve seen men get killed in the cage trying to rewrite the past.”

  “Santos…”

  “Gain the weight and we can train at Christmas. But I’m not making any guarantees come May. I’ll help you but if you’re not ready, I’m not feeding you to the lions.”

  I let out a sigh. This is not what I wanted. But from the way he sounded, this was my only shot. I had to prove myself before I got a shot to prove myself.

  I nodded and he sat back, content. This guy was for real.

  “9 am on the 25th.”

  “What? ChristmasDay?”

  “You’ve had enough time off, right?” He smiled slightly.

  “Alright, “I said slowly, “Christmas it is.”

  Regardless of his frightening appearance, something about him put me at ease. He stood and stretched out his palm. I masked the ache I felt in my knee when I stood to shake his hand. This was going to be one hell of a ride.

  “Jack the Axe,” he said with the same gleam in his eye. We heard Aaron’s loudwhoop from the practice ring and we both chuckled.

  “If I can make a champion out of that goofy kid, just think what I can do for you. He’s a pain. in. the. ass!”

  I laughed and said, “You take credit for that?”

  “Only the defense moves. The personality was warped way before he got here.”

  Laughing again I realized that being around a guy like Santos was refreshing compared to Don’s humorless, ugly demeanor.

  “Now that he’s fighting like a veteran maybe you can work on that personality?”

  Santos shrugged. “Ah I’ve tried, believe me. He’s come a long way from the kid I saw fighting in the rat holes overseas. He trusts me now. Before he’d just totally ignore me!”

  “Not me. I’ll do everything you say. Just get me back to New York in May. You’ll see, I’ll be ready.”

  “You gotta eat too. Your skinny ass needs about ten more pounds on it.”

  I smiled with quick nod. “Yeah and I need to get my skinny ass to my therapy appointment now, but I’ll be back and we can get started.”

  “Don’t forget your gear, lightweight.” His big laugh rumbled a light nearby.

  I grinned. “You got it coach. And uhm… thanks.”

  As I drove across town I thought about Amara and that kiss we’d shared on Halloween. My cock twitched as I remembered the way her soft hand had felt on my stomach. For the three weeks in between though, she’d been really distant. She’d even taken a few days off.

  I let myself believe it was because she didn’t trust herself around me…I thought about her amazing body and shivered again. Damn it felt good to press our bodies together. She fit me, like a glove.

  And her body was just the beginning. I’ve gotten to see her with her other patients and with her co-workers and what I’ve seen is a compassionate woman with a lot of heart and determination. I also see the overwhelming love in her eyes when she talks about her little girl. The light in her eyes and face overwhelms me sometimes. She’s tough, but she’s fair and she gives me plenty of praise when I work hard and accomplish my goals. Sometimes I feel like I want to jump up in her lap and let her rub me behind my ears like a puppy dog… I snort, hardly believing it was so possible for me to be attached to her already. But I was.

  I had to convince her to go out with me so we could see each other outside of the walls of our “professional” relationship. I’d asked her subtly more than once. She started out with,“I don’t date my clients,”and when I told her that I wouldn’t be her client forever, she’d changed tactics and told me,“I don’t date fighters.”

  “Why?” I’d asked her.

  “I just don’t believe in violence.”

  “It’s a sport like… football.”

  “It’s a sport based on crushing some one’s willpower and I’m sorry but I’m just not into it.”

  “You don’t have to be into it… especially since I’m not fighting.”It wasn’t really a lie right?… I wasn’t fighting rightnow.

  That day she had changed the subject and we moved onto something else. I let it go, but today I resolved to give it another shot.

  Throughout our session, I was on my best behavior. As I was doing my final cool down exercises I finally turned towards her. Today she wore a peach colored polo and slacks that made her ass look ripe.

  It had been months since I’d had a woman but I couldn’t bring myself to respond to the texts I’d gotten from random fangirls offering to help me “get better sooner.” Amara was the only cure I wanted.

  “So when are you going to let me take you out?”

  She eyed me casually. “I told you I don’t date fighters, Jack.”

  “Then let’s not fight.”

  She smiled shyly and my heart skipped a beat. God, this woman!

  Once again, I did feel bad for lying… I hadn’t started fightingagain. I hated the thought of never being with Amara again after recovery. In my mind I’d already been with her a thousand times and I wanted to have her in my life for good. My time with her was the highlight of my week.

  Besides, no one in my past had measured up to her - not even close and I didn’t see my future with anyone else but her. But I also want to be back in the cage…

  “Why do you hate fighters so much anyways?”

  “Okay, it’s not the actual fighters per say... Some of them are okay.” She gave me a little smile and I grinned.

  “It’s the barbaric attitude of it all…My late husband was killed overseas in a way Jack... I’m not onboard with violence of any sort.”

  Her pretty eyes had moisture in the corners of them and suddenly I felt like shit. I wanted to take her in my arms and hold her close and comfort her. I took a cautious step forward and put my hand on her back. She surprisingly allowed me to rub her back slightly - not the warm hug I was hoping for, but it would do for now.

  “He was gone a lot before he died. Nala has never really had a father… all because of the fighting. She doesn’t really have that kind of stability at all. My own father travels a lot. Time’s like Thanksgiving make me think about this stuff all over again.” Her voice quivered.

  “It will be just the two of you?” I asked.

  “Yes, just the two of us.” She smiled slightly but not before I saw the flash of sorrow in her eyes.

  “Well aren’t you a lucky girl. I need a date for Thanksgiving dinner! You’ve already met my mom even.” I say with a wink. “Roger’s mountain is beautiful right now.”

  “Roger’s mountain?” Her eyes sparkled with curiosity.

  “Well, it’s not reallyhis mountain. He has a place just above San Vicente Mountain Park though. Have you ever been there?”

  “No, I can’t say that I have.” Her face lifted into a smile. So beautiful.

  “It’s gorgeous. On a clear day you can see downtown L.A. and sometimes even the ocean after a big rain when the smog is cleared out.”

  “I don’t know about taking Nala on a long trip…”

  “I promise it’s not that far. Once you’re up there it seems like you’re miles from civilization, but you’re still pretty close. And mom and Roger will be there the entire time. It’s a straight shot up Hayvenhurst off of Ventura and up into the Encino Hills through Mulholland. It’s the holidays. Your girl will have a great time. My mom goes all out!”

  “You don’t think Caroline and Roger will mind?”

  “Are you kidding? My mother has been driving me insane with her ‘I want to be a grandmother before I’m eighty’ routine. She’ll love spending time with Nala.”

  Amara glanced up at me. I felt like she wanted me too but she wouldn’t allow herself to feel that way.

  “Give me
a chance…”

  She furrowed her brows and I braced myself for another rejection. I was surprised as hell when she finally spoke.

  “Okay, Nala will probably enjoy that more than an entire day with just me.”

  I felt my heart swell and crack. “You won’t regret it, I promise.”

  ***

  I picked up Amara and Nala from their home in the Hills at eleven on Thanksgiving Day. Amara was wearing a short-sleeved sweater dress that hugged her curves the way I always wanted to. It was a silver color and she had on a pair of the same color leather boots and about six inches of her gorgeous bronze legs were showing in between. Her hair hung softly around her face and shoulders and those gorgeous eyes were highlighted with just a touch of eyeshadow that caught the light… God, she’s beautiful.

  Nala is adorable as well. She had her hair in two braids and she was wearing a frilly little dress and patent leather shoes. She had her mom’s eyes and I could tell that Mom was going to need a big stick when she got older to fight off the boys.

  “Hi. You ladies look amazing.”

  Amara smiled at me and said, “Thank you, so do you. This is my daughter, Nala. Nala this is Mr. Hanks.”

  I put my big hand out to the tiny little girl. “Jackson will do. Hi.”

  She looked at my hand which had to look like a giant paw to her and hid her little face behind her mother’s leg. “Nala, don’t be rude.”

  “Ah, don’t worry about it,” I told her with a smile down at the little girl who had now peeked one eye out to look up at me. I can’t remember ever being that small.

  “Are you ladies ready?” Amara grabbed her bags from her porch and I took them from her. She’d talked to my mother on the phone and Mom had insisted we all stay the night that way Nala could have time to run and play on some of the trails in the morning. IfI had asked, Amara would have said no…Go mom!

  “Are you sure you’re okay with those?” she was eyeing my knee.

  I grinned and stiffened my jaw with a frown. Tough guy. “I’ve got it,” I told her and she smiled.

  On the drive Nala loosened up a bit. I asked her about her school and she told me they studied Pilgrims and Indians this week. She also told me that Becky had” showeded” her how to make a turkey with her hand.