April Fools

by Mari Carr

  He didn’t move for the count of at least five, unhappy about walking away. Fiona was the first to shake free.

  “Your turn, McCarthy,” she said, her voice suddenly huskier than it had been a few minutes before.

  Asher’s dick responded. Dammit. He tried to subtly adjust his jeans as he walked to the stage.

  If anyone had told Owen that Asher McCarthy would steal the show on karaoke night a few hours ago, Owen would have laughed them out of the pub.

  Now…

  Owen knew Asher had a decent singing voice. After all, he’d heard the other man jamming in the shower back when they’d shared a dorm room. But Asher had never let loose, never revealed this soulful side. He’d selected one of Owen’s favorite songs, “Budapest,” singing it as good as—if not better than—George Ezra.

  And unlike him, Asher didn’t pretend there wasn’t a deeper meaning hidden in his song choice. His eyes were locked on Fiona. Her light blush deepened, but she didn’t attempt to hide it. Her sweet smile grew as Asher continued to serenade her, and Owen watched her reaction, awestruck by how truly touching this moment was.

  Seeing Asher stroke Fiona’s neck, watching their obvious attraction, had awakened something in Owen. Something he was struggling to contain.

  Toward the end of the song, Owen forced himself to look back at the stage. He was surprised when Asher’s attention turned to him as he sang, “give me one good reason why I should never make a change,” before he focused on Fiona once more.

  “I’ve got a boner the size of Florida,” Teddy said as he reclaimed his seat, and Owen forced a laugh. He was suffering from the same affliction after watching Asher with Fiona. Asher’s song had ended and several of the tipsier women had made their way to the stage, flirting and offering to buy him drinks. Predictable as always, Asher politely declined all offers.

  “Where the hell did that guy come from?” Teddy asked Asher as he returned to the table.

  “What guy?”

  “Sex incarnate! Jesus, man. Come to the dark side. I’m begging you.”

  Asher laughed. “Sorry, Ted. Princess Leia just dumped her Stormtrooper.” He looked at Fiona, who was clearly aghast by Asher’s outright declaration. “Gotta take my shot before the next big gesture comes along.”

  Fiona tilted her head. “How much have you had to drink tonight?”

  “Two beers. I’m not drunk. By the way, Owen’s tossing his hat in the ring too.”

  Now it was Owen’s turn to sit there with his mouth hanging open. “What the hell are you saying, man?”

  Teddy, who was never without a million words, sat there absolutely speechless, which meant the bomb Asher dropped was followed by a painfully long silence.

  Fiona stood when it continued. “I…I…”

  “No, Fee,” Asher said, cutting her off. “Don’t say anything tonight. Or tomorrow night. We’ll revisit this conversation Sunday morning. After the Anything Goes party.”

  “The party,” she whispered.

  Owen shook himself from his stupor. Asher had opened a door and Owen didn’t have a clue how to close it. Or even know if he even should.

  Owen stood as well, then leaned toward her, searching for the right response. She lifted her face to his, so he gave her the kiss she seemed to be inviting. He’d intended to keep it quick, but she tasted good, her breath flavored by Chardonnay and sweet chocolate from the dessert they’d all split earlier.

  She was the first to break away, and it was then he realized Asher was standing now too. Fiona turned toward him with a guilty grin. “Why do I feel like we’re driving a hundred miles an hour toward a brick wall?”

  “Because you are,” Teddy muttered, his expression black.

  Teddy was angry, and that rage only grew when Fiona looked at Asher and said, “Is it worse that I don’t care?”

  Teddy huffed out a soft sound of disgust, then picked up his beer to take a big swig, mumbling something about being surrounded by a pack of fools.

  Asher ran his knuckles along Fiona’s cheek. “We’ll see you tomorrow night at the party.”

  She nodded, and Owen could tell she was waiting to see if Asher would give her a good-night kiss as well. When he didn’t move to initiate one, she gave them an adorable finger wave and headed toward the stairs that would take her to the apartment above.

  “Have you lost your mind?” Owen asked Asher, who shook his head.

  “Nope. I just figured a few things out. I got a good feeling about this.”

  Owen snorted. “Well, I’m glad you do. Because I’m with Fee on this. We’re barreling straight toward our doom.” He dropped back down in his chair.

  The smile never faded from Asher’s face as he said, “trust me,” before turning toward the bar to pay their tab.

  “What the fuck is going on?” Owen asked Teddy when they were alone.

  Teddy nodded slowly. “I think Asher just opened the door for you, him and her to have a threesome.”

  “I’m not a threesome guy.”

  He hadn’t meant the words as a joke, but Teddy reacted as if he’d just said the funniest thing ever. “Well, I suggest you do some research before tomorrow night.”

  “I’m being serious, man.” Owen’s stomach clenched at the thought of what Asher was proposing.

  Teddy reached over and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I know you are, Owen, but I can’t help you make this decision. It has to be yours. You know that, right?”

  Owen nodded—and accepted that he wasn’t going to get a minute’s sleep tonight.

  For better or worse, everything changed tomorrow.

  6

  Teddy cornered Asher three seconds after Owen got in the shower to get ready for the party.

  “What are you up to?”

  Asher didn’t bother to pretend he didn’t understand the question. “I started thinking about that Anything Goes concept when Fiona originally suggested the idea. Indulged in a few fantasies about what mine would involve. Truth is, I never thought I’d get the chance to act on them.”

  “And Owen was in the bedroom with you and Fee during these fantasies?”

  Asher shook his head. “No. But I’ve been thinking about it since Thursday night.”

  “There’s a difference between thinking and fantasizing.”

  “Yeah,” Asher admitted, “I know that.”

  Teddy perched himself on the edge of the coffee table in the living room of their suite. He’d invited Ryan to the party and had been a bundle of nervous energy ever since the other man accepted. “If you have sex with Owen, I’ll cut my dick off and live life as a eunuch.”

  Typical dramatic Teddy response.

  “How long are you going to pretend to have a crush on me?” Asher asked.

  “I stopped pretending it was a crush in college. These days I’ve upped my game—now I pretend I’m madly in love with you. More of a challenge for me and it gets bigger laughs.”

  Asher sat on the couch and propped his feet up on the coffee table next to Teddy. “I’m not sleeping with Owen.”

  “But you don’t mind if Fee does…as long as you’re in the bed too?”

  “I was watching Sean, Chad and Lauren last night, and—”

  “Who are Chad and Lauren?” Teddy joked.

  “You gotta stop coming on to Fiona’s uncles, man. I’m not sure she finds it funny.”

  Teddy waved his concern away. “She loves it. Besides, unlike straight Tris, Sean’s bi. Thought I might actually have a shot there.”

  Asher lifted one brow.

  Teddy chuckled, conceding. “If he weren’t in love with Chad. And Lauren. Who were both at the table with us. So you were watching them last night and…” Teddy was the king of affected pauses.

  “I saw an answer to an unsolvable problem.”

  Teddy rubbed his jaw. “Doesn’t mean it’s the right answer.”

  “You suggested it.”

  “I was drunk as a skunk. And joking.”

  “I know.”


  “You realize you blindsided Owen last night. He was still thinking tonight would be a free-for-all, winner-takes-all deal. Then you went and threw him into a ménage scenario.”

  “Yeah. Part of me thinks I’m pushing too hard, moving too fast. Then I think about watching her with Brock the last five years, and I remember it’s been a lifetime of waiting.”

  Teddy tilted his head. “You weren’t waiting alone for a few of those. Christina—”

  “I was never in love with her. You know that.”

  “I do. What happens if Owen bucks the threesome idea?”

  Asher ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know.” Given Owen’s upbringing and the feelings he shared last night about wanting someone to love him, Asher was more determined than ever to make tonight work. Asher was in love with Fiona, and if the only way he could have her without breaking his best friend’s heart was to share her, then so be it.

  “Don’t you think you should figure that out?” Teddy asked.

  “You know what? No. I’m tired of planning everything down to the nth degree and then telling everyone what to do. Everybody gets to be impulsive but me. Fiona buys shoes the way some people buy food. Owen jets off for ski weekends whenever there’s fresh powder just because he wants to. You pick out guys on Tinder based on no more than their looks. Why can’t I do something crazy…just for the hell of it?”

  “Because you’re not crazy. And this is. Besides, I’m not sure Owen is as impulsive as you’re giving him credit for. Skiing is a lot different than orgies.”

  “It’s not an orgy, and I don’t care. I’m not giving him time to reject the idea before we’ve tried it.”

  Teddy laughed. “Jesus. I never realized what an effect I was having on you until this moment. I’ve clearly been a bad influence. Tell you what. Take a few minutes in the shower to play out the fantasy…with a naked Owen as part of the scenario. You can’t just dream about you and Fee. If you’re determined to see this through, you’d better be ready to walk the walk. But no boy touching between you two. I mean it. I’ve been in line for that way longer than both you fuckers.”

  “That’s not going to be a problem.”

  Teddy didn’t seem convinced…which threw Asher off-balance. He had always thought Teddy was joking about the crush on him, but for a second, Asher got the sense his friend was genuinely jealous.

  “I’m serious, Ted.”

  Teddy nodded. “I know you are.”

  “Is there something else bothering you?”

  “I’m just not sure mixing Owen’s TV-star ego with your control-freak nature will make for an easy blend in the bedroom.”

  Asher leaned forward, resting his elbows on his thighs. “You think we’ll be fighting to be in charge?”

  “Fuck no. Fiona’s got that gig wrapped up.”

  Asher laughed, but didn’t disagree. “You think I’m making a mistake.” He didn’t bother to turn his comment into a question. He could tell Teddy had more than a few doubts.

  His friend’s response surprised him. “If anyone could find a way to take a perfect friendship and make it more, it would be you, Asher. And if you succeed…everyone is happy.”

  For some strange reason, Asher got a sense that Teddy wasn’t including himself in that “everyone.”

  If you succeed…

  Teddy’s words were still ringing in his ears as they climbed the stairs to the Collins Dorm later that night. They could hear the music as they reached the top, mingled with lots of loud voices, and the smell of…

  “Bacon!” Teddy cried out as they entered. He made a mad dash for the dining room and Asher and Owen started to follow, but they stopped when Fiona approached them.

  “You’re here.”

  Asher nodded slowly as he let his gaze travel along the length of her. She’d pinned two lengths of hair back, leaving the majority of it loose. There was a tiara nestled amongst the auburn tresses. That was all normal enough for her. She kept three tiaras in her desk drawer at work just for shits and giggles and wore them more often than Asher figured was probably natural.

  It was the rest of her outfit that blindsided him.

  “Belle?” Owen asked.

  Fiona giggled as she lifted the skirt on her bright yellow dress and twirled. Her shoulders were bare from the off-the-shoulder style of the ball gown, and her little pirouette revealed the matching yellow slippers underneath.

  “Did we say it was a costume party?” Asher asked.

  Fiona gave him an incredulous look. “Um…it’s an Anything Goes party,” she explained as if he’d missed the memo. “I’m pretty sure costumes were implied.”

  “I feel like I want a do-over,” Owen said. “I’d rock a Magic Mike look.”

  “Oooo,” Fiona said, her eyes widening in approval. “Go home and change. We can wait. Or better yet…let me find the appropriate music and you can get into character here.” She reached out, tugging his T-shirt from his jeans.

  Owen laughed—until her hands slid beneath the cotton to his waist. “Um, Fee…”

  “Hitting the ground running, are we?” Asher asked, stepping behind Fiona to sandwich her between him and Owen. “I like it,” he whispered in her ear.

  He and Owen exchanged glances for the briefest of seconds and once again, Asher struggled to read Owen’s expression, which was somewhere between aroused and deer in the headlights.

  The moment ended when Teddy called out, “You guys have got to come see this!”

  Owen took a step back until Fiona’s hands fell away, then he headed toward their friend.

  Asher wasn’t so quick to give up his spot. Neither was Fiona.

  She leaned back against him.

  “I like your dress.”

  She laughed, then turned to face him. “You really think this will work?”

  “I have no idea what you mean.” He played dumb, waiting to see if she’d give him some indication of her own feelings.

  Unfortunately, Fiona never showed her hand too quickly. It was why he’d stopped playing poker with her. She studied his face, waiting instead for him to reveal something.

  He was tempted, but it was too early in the night. Asher reached up to cup her face with both hands. “You look beautiful.”

  Fiona leaned toward him, but he resisted the urge to kiss her. There was plenty of time for that when it was just the three of them. He released her with a quick peck on the tip of her nose that irritated her, given her sudden scowl, then he went to join Owen and Teddy.

  The second he saw the dining room table, he understood Teddy’s excitement. Sunnie had outdone herself with the food.

  “Holy heart attack,” he murmured.

  “It’s perfect and you know it,” Sunnie said, walking up behind him. Like her cousin, she’d opted for Disney princess.

  “Greetings, Jasmine,” Asher said. “Nice veil.”

  “I can’t believe we didn’t think of costumes,” Teddy grumbled.

  “Magic Mike, right?” Owen asked.

  Teddy’s eyes widened at the suggestion. “We’re going to have this party over again next weekend. We fucked up royally. I’ll be Channing Tatum and you can be Matthew McConaughey.”

  Owen scowled. “I’m Joe Manganiello and you know it.” He tilted his head toward Asher. “He’s McConaughey.”

  “This isn’t a fight I’m jumping into,” Asher said as he studied the tower of bacon sitting in the center of the table. “How much bacon is that?”

  “Twenty pounds,” Sunnie replied as if it was perfectly normal to fry up the better part of a pig as a centerpiece. “But this is what you should really try.” She picked up a toothpick holding a wedge of hot dog wrapped in bacon. “They’re baked with brown sugar and to die for. And for dessert, we have—”

  “Ice cream sundaes with bacon bits?” Teddy asked hopefully.

  “No, but I suggested that, believe me. Fiona said ice cream and beer didn’t mix.” Sunnie rolled her eyes as if that statement was complete madness. “My mom made u
s chocolate-covered bacon instead.”

  Asher crossed his arms. “So, when Fiona said we were having an Anything Goes party, your first thought was bacon feast?”

  Sunnie looked at him as if he’d sprouted an extra head. “Of course it was. After the Jasmine costume.” She looked Asher up and down, shaking her head. “By the way, weak attempt, man.”

  Asher had been thinking too hard about what would happen after the party to consider the food and attire.

  Teddy excused himself when Ryan arrived, and Sunnie went along to meet him. Owen grabbed a plate and started piling it with the bacon-wrapped hot dogs, four slices of bacon from the tower, a potato skin piled with bacon bits and bacon guacamole.

  “Try as I may, I can’t see anything wrong with this plate,” Owen joked.

  Asher conceded the victory to Sunnie. “Me, either.”

  “Are you guys ready to get this party started? We need to lay a base of liquor before the beer.” Fiona appeared with a tray of tequila shots and a tub of cotton candy.

  They’d been friends long enough that neither guy put up a fuss about the lack of limes and salt. Hell, she’d made Asher take so many of her sugar shots in the past, he was starting to like them.

  They both took a glass and a pinch of the cotton candy. Fiona set down the tray and followed suit. They lifted their glasses.

  “Here’s to Anything Goes,” Fiona said.

  “Anything Goes,” Asher repeated, watching her take the shot, the action drawing his gaze to her slender neck and the ample cleavage peeking out of the top of her dress.

  A quick look to his left proved Owen was enjoying the view too.

  Asher tried to beat down the flash of jealousy that flared.

  He’d taken Teddy’s advice and tried to work up a fantasy that included both Owen and Fiona. It hadn’t gotten him as hot and hard as the one that starred him and Fiona alone. Or the one of him with Fiona and Sunnie. Or him, Fiona, Sunnie and Yvonne. He was only human, after all, but it wasn’t completely out of the realm of—

  Who was he kidding? His hard-on was raging when he imagined Fiona, but it deflated pretty quickly when Owen appeared in the dream scene.