Spend My Life with You

by Donna Hill

  “Dom, no one thinks of you that way.”

  “Of course they do. And I did it to myself for years. Part of me likes it, but at the root of it all, I just want him to love me for me.” A tear slid down her cheek. “After Mama, Rafe and you, it seems like he didn’t have any more love left.”

  Lee Ann’s heart seemed to twist in her chest. She got up from her chair and came around to Dominique. She knelt down in front of her. “Dom, listen to me.”

  Dominique looked up through tear-filled eyes.

  “Daddy can be a hard man. We all know that. But don’t ever doubt for a minute his love for you.” She squeezed her hands. “Do you think he would fuss you out as much if he didn’t care? He thinks you’re wild and frivolous because that’s the way you act, sweetie. You have no idea how proud he is of what you’ve accomplished.”

  “Proud? He never tells me.”

  “I know. But he tells me.”

  Dominique blinked in amazement. “What does he say?”

  “That the work you are doing is important. He knew you had it in you if you put your mind to it. He wanted to finance the whole thing, but he knew that you needed to do it yourself.”

  “He said that?”

  Lee Ann nodded.

  Dominique wiped her eyes. “I never knew.”

  “Now you do. And if you ever say that I told you, I will deny it on a stack of Bibles.” She grinned.

  Dominique sputtered a laugh. “Okay.” She sniffed.

  Lee Ann slowly stood. “How about if you use some of your skills and help me shop for some outfits for my trip?”

  Dominique brightened. “Now you’re talking.”

  For the past few weeks, Preston had done everything within his power to avoid Charlotte. She’d left numerous messages—none of which he’d returned. Anthony had called, as well. The pressure was beginning to get to him, and there had been moments when he was a phone call away from agreeing to deal with Paulsen. The only thing that kept his head straight was Lee Ann, talking with her, looking forward to the next time they would be together. She’d unwittingly become his conscience. He didn’t want to do anything that would tarnish her view of him, even if it meant him forgoing what could easily make him the hero of the Gulf.

  He wanted to tell her about Charlotte and Anthony and the opportunity that was being placed at his feet. But he couldn’t, so he talked to the one other person in the world that he trusted, Paul.

  “If you do this, agree to letting them support you, you’ll be indebted to them for the long haul,” Paul had said over drinks the prior night.

  “I know. But if I do, thousands of children will have a future. Schools will get rebuilt, community schools, my dream. Teachers will be employed and there will be the promise of a better life for everyone.”

  Paul exhaled. “There has to be another way.”

  “Yeah, there should be. But if this bill ever gets passed it will never happen. As much as they claim it will revolutionize education, it’s nothing more than government takeover. And we know the government has a lousy track record when they take over anything.”

  “Understatement.”

  “The president is pushing the reform. But no one can agree on the how.”

  Paul leaned forward. “Look, you know him. You worked with him. Why don’t you arrange for a meeting and talk to him, lay out your plan? That way you don’t bump heads on the floor and the decision will come from the man, and you won’t be looked at as the holdout, the new upstart.”

  Preston swirled his drink around. “I’ll think about it.”

  He held his glass toward Preston. “Do.”

  And he had been all day. He’d been going over the details of his idea. If he could get the funds to begin setting up model schools, it was something that could be replicated across the country. He’d work on setting up a meeting with the president when he got back from Cancun.

  Chapter 11

  “Excited?” Preston asked as he and Lee Ann took their seats on the plane.

  “Very.”

  “I’ve been dreaming about this trip for weeks. I want to make it a time you’ll never, ever forget.” He kissed her lightly on the lips.

  “We have a private bungalow on the beach,” he whispered in her ear, “a housekeeper who will prepare all our meals, access to all the amenities of the resort, a car at our disposal and all the time we want to spend with each other.”

  She sighed in delight. “How did you have time to arrange for all of this?”

  “I have a great assistant. I told her what I wanted, and she took care of all of the arrangements.”

  “Well, aren’t you a lucky man having women willing to do your bidding,” she teased.

  He leaned closer and whispered in her ear. “The only woman I’m interested in doing my bidding is you.”

  A shiver ran through her. “And you know as the daughter of a politician…”

  “I know, quid pro quo.”

  They laughed and held hands as the plane taxied down the runway.

  From the moment they stepped off the plane in Mexico, they could feel the energy. Everywhere they looked, bodies glistened and laughter and excitement filled the air.

  After clearing customs, they collected their luggage, and Preston had a car waiting that took them directly to their bungalow.

  Their house on the beach was everything that Preston said it would be and more. The front was glass from end to end and looked out onto endless beauty. The sandy beaches were blindingly white, and the water was certainly the bluest water in all of the Caribbean.

  The layout was open air with one room leading into the other. The master bedroom came complete with a Jacuzzi and a skylight for watching the heavens right over the king-size bed. The furnishings were a cool off-white in a heavy linen fabric and offset by standing plants and splashes of color in turquoise, sunset orange and lemon yellows. It was like walking through paradise.

  “It’s gorgeous,” she said, moving from room to room.

  Preston slid up behind her and put his arms around her waist. He turned her to face him. “Nothing compares to you, Lee.” He put a finger to her lips when she started to protest. “I know it sounds like a line. But I think you know me well enough by now to know that I say what I believe and what I feel.”

  She swallowed.

  “To me you are the most beautiful, most extraordinary woman I’ve ever known. And I’m going to spend all week long proving it to you.”

  Looking at the sincerity in his eyes and hearing it in his voice she realized once again how much Preston had impacted her life and her vision of herself. Lee Ann sunk into the cocoon of his embrace, and for the first time, she said out loud the self-doubts that she’d always lived with.

  “My sisters were always considered the beauties of the family—a striking, showstopping duet.” She rested her head against his chest and was soothed by the steady beat of his heart. “And my brothers are what women call drop-dead gorgeous. Me, I was always considered the cute one.”

  He tenderly stroked her back, wanting to stop her but knowing that she needed to say what was on her heart.

  “Maybe that’s why it was so easy for me to fall into the role of caregiver, nurturer, the responsible one. It’s what I had to offer.”

  “Lee Ann, look at me.”

  She lifted her gaze to meet his. He held her chin in his palm.

  “From the moment I saw you that night across the room, something opened up inside of me. There have been women in my life, but I was always too driven by my career and wouldn’t invest in anyone long term. Except once.”

  Her eyes registered surprise.

  “Her name is Charlotte Dupree.” He released a long sigh. “I guess it’s time I told you about that part of my life.” He took her hand and led her over to the couch.

  Lee Ann’s heart was pounding so loud and so fast that she could hardly breathe. Of course he had a life before her. That wasn’t it. It was the way he said her name.

  Slowly she s
at down, not knowing what to expect.

  Preston had been contemplating telling her about Charlotte ever since that night in the park and then again when she turned up at his house. But there was a part of him that didn’t want to muddy their relationship by even evoking Charlotte’s name. It was stupid. And he felt guilty for hiding something that shouldn’t be hidden. Now, with Paulsen breathing down his neck, Charlotte wasn’t far behind.

  “I met Charlotte when I worked in Chicago doing community activist work with the president—well, before he was president. She was at a rally that I’d helped to organize. We started talking, dating… We got engaged.”

  Lee Ann stiffened.

  Preston looked off into the distance. “On the day of our wedding, I got a note from her cousin saying she couldn’t marry someone without a future. She was sorry.”

  “Oh, Preston…” She took his hand.

  He shook his head. “It shook me up in ways that I can’t even explain. But what it did for me was give me a purpose. Maybe I wanted to prove her wrong. Maybe I wanted to prove something to myself. But I poured myself into my career to the exclusion of everything and everyone else. Getting ahead and winning were the only things that mattered to me—until I met you and I realized how much of life I’d been missing, I was only existing.”

  She stroked his face. “I know about that kind of hurt, of turning inside yourself and turning the world out.” She told him about Maxwell and how devastated she was by what he’d done, how she blamed herself for not being pretty enough, sexy enough, free-spirited enough because in her mind it had to be her shortcomings and not his. “So if at times it seems that it’s hard for me to accept the things you say it’s because I’m just learning all about a new me, the one that I buried under duty and work and responsibility. The new Lee Ann that you introduced me to.”

  “And I want to teach you, show you, tell you in every way that I can just how pretty and smart and funny and keep-me-up-all-night sexy you are.” He brushed his lips against hers. “And how being with you, having you in my life, has made me want to be better—a better leader, friend, lover, a better man.”

  He kissed her long and slow and deep to confirm and reaffirm his declaration. Her body yielded to his touch, coming alive beneath his tender exploration.

  “How about if we christen our new abode?” he whispered in her ear before dropping hot kisses along her neck.

  “I’ve never made love under a skylight,” she said, her breath escaping in short hot bursts.

  “Say no more.” He scooped her up and carried her off.

  During the day, they did all the touristy things from visiting the Mayan ruins of Tulum, to deep-sea fishing. After much cajoling, kisses and promises of a ravishing night, Lee Ann convinced Preston to rent them both jet skis, which he enjoyed so much he went back the following day. The early evenings were spent nightclub hopping, an entertainment factor that Cancun was known for. Their favorite was Coco Bongo, which offered a mix of music, live shows and could hold up to 3,000 people. And in between it all they talked and learned new things about each other like how Lee Ann was a closet artist and loved to paint in her spare time. Or that Preston wanted to be a tennis player but settled for racquetball. Sometimes she wished she was an only child, and he wished he wasn’t. They both missed their mothers but for different reasons, hers through death and his through a lack of a relationship.

  “When did you talk to her last?” Lee Ann asked as they snuggled amongst the thick pillows and scented sheets.

  “A few weeks ago. I try to stay in touch. Send her money and check to see that she’s all right.”

  She stroked his chest while he talked.

  “It’s not a typical mother-son relationship. I was pretty much on my own since I was a kid. I mean not so much because my mother wanted it that way but because she had no other choice. She was always working—slaving was more like it. And even though I knew she was doing it so we could eat, a part of me still resented her. Resented her for choosing someone who would leave us.”

  She kissed his neck. “We can’t help who we fall in love with,” she said softly. “And we never know how it’s all going to turn out.”

  Preston looked down into her upturned face. “No, we can’t help who we fall in love with.” His eyes moved slowly over her face. He watched the tiny pulse beat in her throat as he brushed her hair off her forehead. “I’m in love with you, Lee Ann.” His own words stunned him in their spontaneity and moved through him like a warm wave that he couldn’t explain. “I love you.”

  Lee Ann’s breath caught in her chest. She reached for him and pulled him to her, covering his lips, tasting him, assuring herself that he was real, that his words were real and echoed the same sentiments in her soul.

  She found herself beneath him, surrounded by him, ignited from the inside out by his touch. The skimpy teddy that Dominique had convinced her to buy found its way to the floor. To Lee Ann, Preston touched her, whispered to her in ways that he had never done before. There seemed to be a new reference, a newness, as if he was finding her for the very first time and the discovery for the both of them took them to a place they had never been.

  They loved slow and gentle, deep and long. Lee Ann clung to him, opening her body to him in ways she’d never done before. He’d always satisfied her, rocked her to her soul. But this time he touched her soul, and the sensation was sublime, lifting her from this earthly place. So sweet, so potent that she wept from a joy so deep it shook her, controlled her, stole her breath and brought her to a climax that was frightening in its magnificence.

  He held her with a tenderness that one does with a precious treasure as he moved within her, and her orgasm continued to build and wrap around him, sucking him into her vortex until he shuddered and shared with her every drop of his essence.

  They lay together in awed silence of what had transpired between them, both realizing that for all the times that they’d been together they’d had wonderful, incredible, mind-blowing sex that bound them and set a foundation for them to build on. But this was different. This time they truly made love. They discovered in each other what making love really was. It was opening yourself up and letting the other person in. It was giving yourself to another totally without holding back and knowing that you were going to be safe with them.

  “Press…”

  “Hmm…”

  “That’s never happened to me before,” she said, her voice still dreamy. “I felt as if I left my body.”

  “I know. So did I.” He stroked the curve of her back, still shaken by the experience.

  Lee Ann moved closer. “Did you really mean what you said?”

  He angled his body so that he could look at her. “Of course I meant it. I never meant anything more. I love you, Lee Ann. And that’s a hard thing for me to admit. I didn’t think I’d feel love again. But this is different. It’s nothing I can compare it with, and I don’t want to. This is me and you. Ours.”

  She needed to hear him say it—have the words stand alone and not be a prelude to what happened between them. Yet even without his admonition she knew it was true. She felt it in the center of her being. And that’s why she knew that she could turn her heart over to him and he wouldn’t break it.

  She cupped his face and stared deep into his eyes. “I love you,” she whispered as her heart thundered and her body tingled.

  “I know,” he said against her mouth, before covering her body with his.

  They spent the next few days of their two-week-long getaway combing the shops for souvenirs to bring back home, lounging on the beach, sampling the restaurants, dancing the night away and falling deeper in love.

  Long into the night they talked, often sitting out on the beach until the sun rose in brilliant hues of red and gold above the horizon.

  But as it grew closer for them to return to the real world, Preston knew that he didn’t want to go back and have anything stand between them.

  Over dinner he told her everything about Charlo
tte and the real reason why she’d “looked him up.”

  “She was at your house while I was talking to you on the phone?”

  “Yes.”

  She thought back to that night months earlier. She looked at him from across the table. “That’s why there were only two glasses in the dishwasher.” She snorted her disbelief. “Why didn’t you just tell me then?”

  “I don’t know—worried about what you would think, not having things clear in my head.”

  “Clear in your head? Like what?”

  “Like whether or not I was going to take her up on her offer to meet with Paulsen.”

  Her head jerked back. “You didn’t actually consider it, did you?”

  His jaw clenched. “The truth?”

  “Yes, Preston. The truth.”

  “Yeah, I did think about it. I thought about it a lot. I know that with the kind of support that Paulsen can provide I can get real change in my district.” He looked away. “But I also knew what it would cost me in the long run.”

  Lee Ann didn’t know what to think, what to believe. If he kept something like that from her, what else would he keep from her? How far was he willing to go to get what he wanted?

  “Is there anything else I should know?”

  “Only that I’m not going to keep anything else from you. I promise you that.”

  “If there was one thing that I learned in my relationship with Maxwell it was that if we can’t be honest with each other then we’re doomed.”

  “It’s been a long time for me too, Lee. I haven’t had to consider someone else’s feelings about what I did in a very long while. It takes some getting used to.”

  She studied his face. “Are you over her?”