Running to Stand Still

by J Theron

  “Hey Danielle! Do you want to go to the beach?” She turned towards the street in front of the house and saw Thomas standing in the street with a surfboard under his arm, clad in a dark grey wetsuit that was partially zipped up, leaving his torso bare.

  For a seventeen year old boy he was extremely sexy and the other girls in school were acutely jealous of their easy and no-nonsense friendship. They could not understand why Danielle did not want to jump his bones and some of the girls even came up to her in school and told her to “release” Thomas so that they could get a shot at him. Her standard reply was, “We are just friends. Please go for it.” He never gave them the time of day though and seemed content to spend all his free time with her.

  “Sure Thomas. Give me five minutes. I’ll meet you at Surfer’s Point.”

  “Okay. Are you bringing your surfboard?” he asked eagerly.

  “I don’t feel like surfing today,” Danielle could see the disappointment on his face and added quickly, “the waves are too big and I don’t feel comfortable enough yet.” She made a face indicating her fear of the big waves. She only recently started surfing because Thomas kept nagging her.

  “Okay babe. See you in a bit. If I’m in the water I’ll see you when I come out. Please keep an eye on Russell. You know how he gets into trouble when I’m surfing.”

  Thomas blew her a kiss and walked away with his surfboard under his arm and his Jack Russell terrier trailing his step. Russell was actually Michael’s dog and mourned for six months after Michael left. After he accepted that Michael was not coming back he started to follow Thomas around.

  Danielle sighed. Russell was the most impossible dog she had ever encountered. He was fiercely loyal to his family, but he had obsessive compulsive disorder according to Danielle. He would chase seagulls along the rocks that jutted into the ocean and then jump into the deep crashing waves to catch them. She had lost count of how many times they had to rescue Russell from the ocean. He would come out of the water half drowned and then run straight back. Hopefully he would behave himself today.

  She ran into the house, quickly changed into her black and silver bikini and grabbed a pair of flip flops and a bright wrap from her closet. She stopped for a second to look at herself in the mirror. At least she developed some curves in the last year since she stopped growing. She was the tallest girl in her school, but it had never bothered her, in fact she liked it. She couldn’t remember the last time she cut her hair and it was hanging well past her elbows. Her skin was tanned from long hours on the beach with Thomas and it made her emerald eyes almost luminous. Grabbing a beach towel from the hall closet she quickly ran down the wooden steps to the beach and jogged to Surfer’s Point.

  Danielle scanned the ocean and found Thomas in the water. He had a bright surfboard that was unmistakeable and she tried to catch his attention with a wave of her arm while he was sitting on his board waiting for a wave. He was too far away and did not see her. She decided to sit down on his towel and rubbed Russell’s head who miraculously sat quietly on the sand scanning the rocks for seagulls.

  She watched Thomas for twenty minutes and tried not to flinch every time the big waves crashed over his head. The ocean was stormy and she felt uneasy watching him dive underneath the huge waves. Suddenly Russell jumped up and ran barking towards a flock of seagulls sitting on the rocks in front of them. The rocks stretched far into the ocean and the deepest rocks were wet from the waves crashing over them every few seconds.

  “Russell, no! Come back,” she shouted, irritated that Russell was up to his old tricks. Russell ignored her and proceeded to jump into the crashing waves as the seagulls flew away over the water. His little body disappeared into the water and she couldn’t see him anymore.

  “Shit, shit, shit! Thomas! Thomas!” Danielle shouted to Thomas but the waves were deafening and he did not hear her, so she made a split second decision and ran onto the rocks and jumped into the maelstrom of water. She barely had time to come up for air before a wave crashed over her head, spinning her in the water and leaving her disorientated for a few seconds.

  She swam with all her might, trying to avoid the black rocks and fighting the panic that threatened to overwhelm her. She was a strong swimmer, but she soon realised she was caught in a current and she was being pulled farther into the ocean. Suddenly she saw the small body of Russell a few metres away, frantically swimming towards the beach but not winning against the unrelenting current.

  “Russell, come here, come here!”

  The little dog heard her and started to swim towards her. The current swept them along and she was able to reach him after a few seconds of hard swimming in his direction.

  “Russell, I have you.” Danielle grabbed his little body and held onto him as the waves crashed over them again and again.

  She tried to relax and float with the current, but the constant fighting with the waves tired her and she felt exhausted, unable to stay afloat. Slowly the feeling of crippling fear and panic was replaced with resignation and her mind went strangely blank as she stopped swimming.

  Just as she was sinking under the surface of the water, she felt a pair of strong hands grab hold of her upper body and pull her out of the water and onto her stomach over a surfboard. She still had Russell in her grasp and felt him wriggle, trying to get onto the surfboard.

  “Danielle! Are you okay? You scared the shit out of me!”

  She expected to hear Thomas’s voice and it took her muddled brain a few seconds to realise it was Michael holding onto her as the waves crashed over the surfboard.

  “What were you thinking jumping into the waves like a crazy person?” Michael was fuming as he paddled against the waves, trying to get them out of the ocean.

  Danielle did not respond. She was shivering violently, a combination of the ice cold water and shock.

  “Why didn’t you call for help when you saw Russell jump in? There are other surfers in the water.”

  They were nearing the shallow water and Michael stopped swimming. He put his feet on the sand and pushed the surfboard towards the beach. As soon as they reached the beach he picked her up and deposited her unceremoniously on solid land.

  She collapsed on the warm sand of the beach as soon as he let go of her. She was on her hands and knees, coughing and gasping for breath in between the racking coughs. Thankfully she did not vomit in front of him, which would have added further to her mortification. Russell on the other hand made a few dainty coughing sounds and then trotted to Thomas’s beach towel as if nothing happened.

  “I nearly did not reach you in time.” Michael loomed over Danielle as he spoke to her.

  She turned on her back to look at him. He looked the same but different. His hair was very short, and his face was slightly leaner. His forearms and torso were muscular and tanned and she could see the veins on his arms and hands.

  Danielle had to swallow a few times to hold back the tears threatening to overwhelm her and she finally managed to whisper, “You saved my life. Thank you.”

  She looked into his stormy blue eyes framed by thick black lashes wet from the sea water. He had a frown on his face and he was staring down at her in silence. She was overwhelmed by her gratitude and the joy of seeing him again and in that moment she fell deeply in love for the first and last time.

  CHAPTER 4

  Danielle slowly became aware of a few people milling around them and then Thomas fell on his knees on the sand next to her. She was starting to feel better and the strength was returning to her limbs. She dragged her gaze away from Michael’s blue eyes to focus on Thomas.

  “Danielle, are you okay? I was surfing one minute and the next minute I saw Michael hauling you out of the water on his surfboard!” Thomas was breathing heavily, probably from his frantic effort of getting out of the water and then running to where she was lying on the sand.

  “Russell jumped into the waves and he was drowning….” She could not muster the effort to finish her sentence.

  Thomas
stared at her and then seemed to register that Michael was standing next to him. “Michael, Bro, what are you doing here? I didn’t realise you’re home.” Thomas looked at Michael as if he saw a ghost.

  “I arrived home this afternoon. Dad said you were surfing and I decided to join you. I was a few hundred metres away when I saw Danielle disappear into the waves. I’ve never run so fast in my life.” Michael inhaled slowly and brushed his hand over his short hair in agitation.

  “We need to leave Russell at home from now on,” Danielle said with a grin on her face and watched in amusement as Thomas and Michael gaped at her.

  “Help me up. I want to go home,” she said to no one in particular and watched as Michael reached for her and then step aside as Thomas hauled her to her feet. She had great difficulty quenching the feeling of disappointment when Michael backed away.

  “Come babe. Can you walk?” Thomas put his one arm around her, picking up his surfboard with the other.

  “I’m okay. Thanks,” she said as she brushed the sand from her body.

  “Russell, you’re in big trouble!” Thomas looked at Russell sternly before turning to Michael. “Are you coming with us, Michael?” Thomas asked absentmindedly, his attention still focused on Danielle.

  “I will chat to you later, Thomas. I’m dying to get into the water,” Michael said amicably.

  Danielle looked over her shoulder as they walked away and saw Michael standing motionless on the beach staring after them. His face was masked and she could not tell what he was thinking. He stood like that for a few seconds before picking up his surfboard and jogging into the ocean.

  Danielle was baffled when she faced Thomas. “That was quite a surprise when Michael pulled me out of the water. He was the last person I expected to see. Why didn’t you tell me he was coming home for Christmas?”

  “I didn’t know. We haven’t heard anything from him in months. He was never big on writing, but the last few months the letters completely dried up. He even stopped writing to Carin. I think the dude has serious issues,” he replied.

  Danielle had a sudden urge to find out exactly what the issues were, but she did not want Thomas to notice her infatuation with his brother, so she kept silent. She never discussed Michael with Thomas and she wasn’t about to start now. They walked in silence and when they reached the wooden stairs leading to the houses above the dunes he stepped aside, so that she could walk up the stairs in front of him. When they reached her house he stopped and turned to her.

  “We are having that street party at our house tonight, remember? The whole neighbourhood is invited. Do you feel up to it?” he asked, all the while scanning her face anxiously as if seeking for signs of emotional trauma.

  “Of course. I’ve been looking forward to it the whole week! I’ll see you tonight. Thanks for walking me home,” she said and she could see the relief on his face.

  “No problem, babe! You look smoking hot in that bikini by the way.” He winked at her as he walked backwards in the direction of his home. He lifted his hand in a mock salute before spinning around and jogging back to his house with his surfboard under his arm and Russell on his heels.

  Danielle slowly turned and walked into her house. Thankfully nobody was at home and she felt relieved not having to explain what happened on the beach. She walked straight to the bathroom, stripped off her bikini and stepped into the shower.

  She closed her eyes as the scalding water cascaded down her body and all she could see was Michael’s blue eyes as he gazed down at her after he pulled her out of the water. She had an ominous feeling that her life had just changed irrevocably. She realised that she was in love with him even though she could not suppress the feeling that he had withdrawn from her emotionally.

  “You are so screwed, Danielle Rousseau. Totally and completely.”

  When Danielle arrived at the party that night she anxiously scanned the crowd, looking for Michael. She was dying to speak to him and she wanted to ask him why he stopped writing to her. She thought he owed her at least that much. They were friends after all. She wished Rachel was there but she was visiting a friend in Cape Town for a few days.

  The older people including her parents were sitting on deck chairs on the massive patio overlooking the ocean and the kids and teenagers were milling around the pool and playing games on the lawn. She walked to her parents, who seemed to be very deep in conversation with Michael’s dad, Pete. She hugged her parents before turning to Pete.

  “Hey Pete.” Danielle always felt uncomfortable when she greeted Michael’s dad. He insisted that she call him by his first name even though he was the same age as her parents.

  “Good evening, Danielle. I’m glad you’re here. Thomas seems to stay out of trouble when you’re around,” Pete said wryly.

  She smiled. “I try my best but I’m not always successful.”

  Pete chuckled. “We can only try!”

  “Danni, your mom and I are not going to stay very long,” her father said. “I have to go to the hospital for surgery tomorrow. Don’t walk home by yourself in the dark.”

  She refrained from rolling her eyes because she knew her father hated it. “Dad, we live a few hundred metres down the road. I really don’t think walking home by myself is a problem.”

  “Still, I would prefer it if Thomas could walk you home.” He had a stern look on his face and she knew that arguing was futile.

  “Okay Daddy.”

  “Thanks Danni.”

  Danielle walked to the table with food and drinks and she grabbed a can of Coke. Her parents did not mind her drinking the occasional glass of wine at the dinner table, but they did not want her to drink in public. She looked around at the people milling about and suddenly had the urge to be by herself.

  There was a pool table in the basement of the house. Thomas kept harassing his father until he bought one a few months ago and she and Thomas had been glued to it ever since. She slipped through the side door she knew led to the basement and felt relieved that she did not have to talk to anybody.

  The large basement was only partially lit with a solitary light burning above the pool table. The room appeared to be deserted and she picked up one of the pool cues lying across the table and started to set up the balls for the break. She slowly walked around the table and bent over as she lined up the cue and the white ball for the first shot.

  Her short black skirt was riding up and exposing her legs all the way to the start of her bum, but she didn’t think about it because she was alone. Just as she was about to take the shot someone spoke from the dark corner behind her.

  “Why am I not surprised to see you here?”

  Danielle almost jumped out of her skin and spun around peering into the darkness. Michael slowly rose from the chair in the dark corner behind the table.

  “You almost scared me to death, Michael. Why are you sitting by yourself in the darkness?”

  He shrugged. “I was thinking.” He did not come closer and she was unable to read the expression on his face.

  “Thinking about what?” she asked curiously.

  “It’s not important.” He answered in such a way that Danielle could tell she should drop it.

  “I’m in the mood for a game. Do you feel like playing some pool?” She stepped in his direction and held out the other cue.

  “Okay.”

  Michael slowly walked towards her and she could not help but feel like prey being stalked by a dangerous predator. As he took the cue, his fingers brushed hers and it felt as if a jolt of electricity ran along her hand. He seemed unaffected and stood back with a thoughtful expression on his face.

  “You can break, Danni,” he said and watched as she bent over awkwardly, suddenly acutely aware of her short skirt and tight tank top.

  Her heart was beating in her throat and she could not get a proper grip on the cue. Michael was standing directly in her line of vision and he looked sinfully sexy in his frayed jeans and white T-shirt. The shirt was just tight enough to show off his
muscular chest and arms. Her first shot was a disaster with the white ball almost missing the other balls completely. She cursed silently as she stood upright and hoped he could not see how disconcerted she was.

  “Hmm. Are you hustling me? I was told that you are an excellent player,” he said as he slowly walked around the table and bent over to take his first shot.

  She tried not to look at him as he bent over, but she was mesmerised by the way his jeans hugged his sexy behind and realised that she was gaping. She closed her mouth and tried to concentrate on the game.

  Michael sank the first ball he aimed at and the second. Danielle decided to pull herself together because she hated losing and she sure as hell was not going to lose to him. He missed the hole by a fraction with his third shot and did not look impressed as he stood upright. She sauntered towards him with a saucy expression on her face.

  “I’m just getting warmed up, Mike! Don’t get too excited.”

  She bent over and aimed at her ball, completely disregarding her offending skirt. She sank the next three balls in quick succession and grinned at him as she pushed him out of the way with her hip to aim at the next ball. He was standing in her way and seemed reluctant to move.

  “Please don’t call me Mike! It drives me crazy and I hate it.” He had a fierce scowl on his face and did not seem to be enjoying himself. He did not move away but looked at her very intently as she stood next to the table with the cue in her hand.

  Danielle took a deep breath to get her racing heart under control. Her brain completely malfunctioned whenever Michael was near. She bent over to take the shot which was good but just missed the hole by a fraction.

  He walked around the table slowly and aimed at his ball. He proceeded to sink all his balls in record time and finally aimed at the black ball. She stared at the table where most of her balls were still scattered. The black ball disappeared into the corner pocket and she turned to him to congratulate him on an excellent game.