Love Me Again

by Teresa Greene

  Jacob and Nick had not yet come in from the fields. A layer of dust covered the furniture and dirty clothes littered the floor. The table and dish pan were full of dirty dishes. Abby had the urge to clean. Anytime she was upset about something, work helped to ease those worries.

  A look of distaste on his face, Ian huffed, “I bet it never looked this way when you lived here.”

  “No, it didn’t.” Thinking this is what her father deserved for threatening to take her baby, Abby smiled. Then she thought of Nick and felt guilty because he had no one to cook for him. Spring planting was the busiest time of the growing season, getting the seeds in the ground. They probably would not come home until dark. Abby rolled up her sleeves, grabbed her old apron off the counter and began to pump water into the dish pan.

  “What are you doing, lass?”

  “What does it look like I’m doing? This place looks like a pig sty. I’m going to clean.” Abby knew she would need something to occupy her time while she waited for her father and Nick to get home. Thoughts of the questions Ian was going to ask Jacob caused her nothing but misery. Her biggest worry was Nick.

  “What do you need me to do, Abby?” His eyes wandered around the room as if he had no idea how to clean.

  Her eyes fixed on James. Under other circumstances they could be great friends. He was so sweet and compassionate, nothing like his father. “Will you sweep the floor?” James grabbed the broom and went to work.

  Ian laid Daniel on the bed in the only clean room he could find. Abby entered to find him tucking pillows around the sleeping child to keep him from falling off the bed. It worried her because he was already attached to Daniel and considered him his grandchild. With a look of devotion on his face, Ian gently touched his chunky cheek.

  As if he sensed her presence, Ian asked, “I guess this was your room?” He glanced around the room and Abby knew what he was thinking. The room was not up to his standards. He gave it the same look of distaste he gave the dirty kitchen and living room.

  The only furniture, a bed and bureau made the room look stark. Not one of the personal items she left behind was visible. She imagined her father removing everything so there would be no reminders of the pain and humiliation she caused him. “Yes, it was my room.” In her mind she saw it as it was before she left. Neat and clean with a colorful quilt she had made herself draped over the bed. During spring and summer she had kept flowers in a beautiful vase that had been her mother’s. Not one thing of hers remained.

  Abby saw the pain in Ian’s eyes as he turned and looked at her. “If you had not been taken from us, you would have had every luxury imaginable. A beautiful home, pretty dresses, love, anything your heart desired. We would have spoiled you rotten. So much was taken from us, lass. We did not get to see your first steps, hear your first word.” Sorrow poured from his voice. “Console you when you cried.”

  A tear slipped down Abby’s cheek. “I’m not, Ellie. I feel sympathy for you, Ian, but I’m not the baby girl that was taken from you.” Unable to withstand the pain she saw in his eyes, Abby strode out of the room. His comments were tearing her up inside.

  Ten minutes later Ian returned to the kitchen, picked up a dish cloth, and began dusting furniture. He looked so big and clumsy holding the cloth. If she was not in such a lousy mood, she would have found the scene hilarious. Maybe he wasn’t such a bad sort after all. In no time the front room was sparkling clean. Abby heard Daniel crying but before she could go to him, Ian disappeared into her old bedroom.

  Curious, Abby slowly opened her father’s bedroom door. Never allowing her to clean his room, it was the first time she had been inside since her mother’s death. Abby gathered the dirty clothes that littered the floor and bed. She wished she had time to wash their clothes before they returned but that would take hours.

  When her mother was still living, Abby would often come in here and play. The room was much nicer and bigger than her and Nick’s bedrooms. Walking through her past, Abby remembered her mother, deathly sick on the brink of death, lying in the lone bed in the room. She watched her mother shrivel and die before her eyes. The day her mother died was her most tragic memory because they had shared a powerful bond. She had been so vibrant and full of life, and then in weeks she was only a shell of herself. Life gave no promises.

  Under the bed she could see the trunk she remembered as a child. Her mother always told her to never open the trunk. It held private papers that were not for the eyes of children. She felt like a thief as she slowly walked toward the trunk. She heaved and pulled until she finally tugged the heavy box of old faded wood to the center of the room.

  Crouched on the floor, she wondered if she should look through it. Something told her she should. She put her hand on top and thought how she was intruding into her father’s privacy. Before she changed her mind, she popped the latch and gripped the lid. The lid squeaked loudly in the quiet of the room. Her heart pounded in her chest as she peered inside.

  A stack of yellowed papers sat on the very top. She fumbled through them only to find the deed for their land and some old letters to her mother from Uncle Taylor. Another stack revealed several old documents, one of them Nick’s birth certificate, and her parents’ marriage certificate. Not finding her birth certificate along with Nick’s, she became uneasy. Gently laying each item to the side after she examined it, she finally made it to the bottom of the trunk. Carefully wrapped in yellowed newspaper, Abby uncovered a tiny pink dress with intricate embroidery. She held the dress and admired the quality of the embroidery. With shaky hands, Abby wondered why she had never seen the dress before. Never having the opportunity for anything as frivolous and time consuming as embroidery, she knew her mother didn’t stitch the beautiful designs. There was a knotted ball in her stomach. For a moment she stayed just as she was, sitting on the hard wood floor, eyes fastened on the tiny dress.

  ****

  “What do you mean she is not here? She knew I was coming. We were going to get married today.” Cord had a sick feeling. Did she have second thoughts and desert him? Everything was going so perfect. What could have happened to cause her to leave? Then there was Taylor and Judith’s strange behavior. Every time he asked Judith a question she would not meet his eyes. A purple bruise on Taylor’s left cheek caused even more suspicions.

  “What happened to your cheek?”

  “I ran into the wall.” Sweat droplets popped out on his brow.

  “It looks more like someone put a fist in your face.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous. Why would someone hit me?” With shaky hands, Taylor pulled Abby’s letter from his pocket. “Abby left you a letter explaining everything.” Snatching the letter away from Taylor, Cord plopped down on the sofa and opened the letter.

  My dearest Cord,

  I hope you are not too angry with me. I could not in good conscious marry you without first speaking to my father. I hope I can convince him to forgive me. Daniel and I will return tomorrow and we can be married then. I hope you understand and give me this time to spend with father and Nick.

  Love, Abby

  Furious eyes stared at Taylor. “You let her leave by herself?”

  “Of course not, she had an escort.” As if insulted by the questions, Taylor placed his hands on his hips.

  “Who went with her?”

  In a calm voice, Taylor replied, “Nick went with her. In fact it was his idea. He arrived early this morning and wanted her to make amends with Jacob before she married you.”

  Relieved, Cord folded the letter and put it in his pocket. At least Nick was with her. Why would she leave and not tell him. Nothing made sense. Impulsive did not describe Abby. She always thought things through. He had a feeling there was more to her leaving than speaking with her father. He would have to wait until tomorrow to find out why she suddenly packed Daniel up and carted him off to Tarboro. Something was going on, but he feared he would not find any answers from Taylor and Judith. They were both being tight lipped.

  ****r />
  “Lass, I’ve tried everything and Daniel won’t stop crying. I think you have what he is wanting.” Abby heard Ian, but she was unable to answer. The pink dress with embroidery held her attention.

  Slowly, Ian walked toward her causing the old, plank boards to creak under his heavy weight. “James!”

  When James entered Jacob’s bedroom, Ian handed him Daniel. “Take him outside and see if you can keep him pacified.”

  James scooped Daniel into his arms. He looked at Abby sitting on the floor as if in a trance. Concern in his voice, he asked, “What happened, Daddy?”

  “I’ll explain later.” With a jerk of his hand, he motioned James from the room. “Leave us alone for a few moments.”

  With the agility of a young man, Ian dropped down on the floor beside Abby. He eased the tiny dress from Abby’s lap, and held it making it look even smaller in his huge hands. Silence lasted for several seconds before he spoke.

  His voice no more than a whisper, Ian said, “You were wearing this dress the night they stole you from us. Your mother spent hours embroidering all those little flowers and green grass.”

  He was reliving the horrible memory of Ellie being taken from them so many years ago. “I was away on business. Grace was not happy with me for leaving her alone so soon after your birth, but it could not be helped. I think she always blamed me for not being there.” At first she tried to block out the sad voice next to her ear. But then deep inside she knew she had to know the truth.

  “Felt I could have kept the intruder from taking you. You were only a week old. Grace had just put you down for a nap so she could play with the boys. Only two years old, James was demanding a lot of attention from his mother because he was jealous of your arrival. She heard you crying so she returned to our room to check on you.”

  Again he hesitated and Abby knew the memories were devastating. “A strange man was lifting you out of the crib. She screamed and tried to stop him, but she was no match for the man’s strength. The man hit her rendering her unconscious. The boys heard Grace scream and came to defend her, but by the time they entered the room the man was climbing out the window with our precious baby girl, with you, lass.”

  Even though Abby never looked at Ian, she heard every word he said. She wrapped her hands around her stomach and bent over in pain. This could not be happening to her. Still she felt there was a logical explanation of why the dress was in the trunk. Never would her mother and father stoop to kidnapping. There had to be another reason the dress was hidden away. She was Abigail Henley not Ellie McDonald.

  James slung open the front door and yelled, “Daddy, you better come quickly, Jacob and Nick just arrived!”

  In one lithe movement Ian stood and helped Abby off the floor. Tucking his arm into hers, he escorted her to the front room and gently lowered her into a chair. She had not spoken a word. Abby noticed he still held the tiny dress and his hands shook. The anger on his face scared her.

  First her father entered, Nick behind him. His voice full of rage, her father shouted, “What is the meaning of this intrusion? Why are you in my house?” He pointed toward Abby still sitting in the chair as if in shock. “Why have you brought these strangers to my home, Abigail?”

  She nearly jumped out of her skin when Ian shook the dress in front of her father and roared, “Explain this!” All the color drained from his face. He looked as if he had seen a ghost. Too shocked to speak, her father never took his eyes off the tiny dress.

  “Did you kidnap my daughter, take the ransom, and decide not to return her?”

  Her father’s anger quickly turned to fright. His voice almost a whisper, “I can explain.”

  Still standing at the door, Nick asked, “Father, what is he talking about?” He chose to ignore Nick.

  Fists clenched at his side, Ian screamed, “You had better explain quickly because I would love to snap your neck and be done with it.”

  Obviously frightened by Ian’s size and temperament, her father chose to explain his actions directly to Abby. Stooping down on one knee in front of her, he took her hand. She glared at him. “You have to understand, Abby. Martha had just lost her second child. We had tried for years to have another child and then to lose it was heartbreaking.” His voice full of pain he continued, “A baby girl, carried to full term. She was devastated. She awoke from a deep sleep by a baby’s cries. By the time I managed to pull myself out of bed, she was warming you by the fire. I told her we could not keep you, but she would not listen to reason.” He hesitated and swallowed hard. His words were coming so fast Abby had to concentrate to understand them. “We had just buried our baby girl the day before you were left on our doorstep. Martha felt you were a gift from God. You were the most beautiful baby we had ever seen. No matter how much I begged, she would not relinquish her hold on you.”

  Ian pulled Jacob up by his shirt collar. His voice vibrated off the wall of the small room. “You are lying! You kidnapped her!”

  Shaking his head, Jacob exclaimed, “No, I swear to God she was left on our doorstep. I am a Christian man and would never take something that belonged to someone else. I have a letter to prove it.”

  Ian shoved Jacob with so much force he stumbled and grabbed the table to keep from falling. Ian’s loud bellow echoed off the walls of the tiny room. “Then prove it!”

  Quickly, Jacob disappeared into his bedroom and returned with a faded, yellow piece of paper with tattered ends. “It was in the bottom of the trunk under the dress.” He handed it to Ian who read it out loud.

  Please take care of my precious baby girl. I am an unwed mother and can no longer afford to keep her. Please love her as if she were your own.

  “I swear she was left on our doorstep. We believed she had been abandoned and raised her as our own. Martha adored her and I didn’t have the heart to go to the sheriff and try to find the real mother, so we became Abby’s family.” Her father grabbed both of her hands and rubbed them between his as if he were trying to warm them. “Please, Abby. You must forgive me. I love you.”

  A strangled sound erupted from Abby’s throat as she pulled her hands away from Jacob. She began to weep, slow tears streaming down her face. Devastated, inconsolable, tears.

  Shoving his father to the side, Nick pulled Abby from the chair and wrapped his arms around her giving comfort. Her sobs intensified as she clung to him, and he tried to console her. Suddenly, Nick lifted Abby into his arms cradling her like a young child. He kicked the door open to her room, carried her inside, and slammed the door loudly behind him. Time seemed to stand still as they lay on the bed and he held her while she cried. Neither spoke as Abby let the pain and betrayal overtake her.

  ****

  An hour later Abby heard Daniel crying. “Nick, will you please get Daniel so I can feed him?”

  Nick slipped off the bed and returned in moments with Daniel. She smiled when she saw her son. Life had dealt her a hard blow today, but she could get through anything because of Daniel. He needed her, and it felt great to be needed.

  Nick sat in a chair by the bed as Daniel’s greedy gulps filled the silence of the room as Abby fed him. Nick must be devastated. All the years they had been inseparable and now for him to find out she was not really his sister.

  His voice full of sorrow, Nick stated, “You know I love you more than anyone else in the world, Abby. I love you more than I did my own mother.” Dropping his head into his hands, Nick gave in to grief and wept. Abby lay Daniel on the bed and touched him on the arm. She fell into his arms and they both sobbed.

  ****

  Without knocking, Ian popped his head into the room. “Lass, as soon as you finish tending to Daniel’s needs, we are leaving. I’m not staying in this house tonight. We are going to town and staying in a hotel.”

  Still sitting in the chair by the bed, Nick bounded to his feet in an instant. “You can’t expect her to leave. She is too distraught.”

  “It’s okay, Nick. I don’t want to stay here either. This is no longer my h
ome.” Abby thought of Cord. “Come with us. I’m getting married tomorrow and want you to be there.”

  “I shouldn’t leave father tonight. I know he has to be as distraught as you and me. I don’t condone what he did, but I’m sure it is as he described. Mother would have been devastated if he had done the right thing and found out who your parents’ were. He could never deny her anything.” His voice ragged, he continued, “She was the only person he put before God.”

  Abby’s voice was full of sorrow as she begged, “I also need you, Nick. Please come with me.”

  Nick sat down on the edge of the bed by Abby and Daniel, his eyes still red and glassy from crying. “I’ll try to meet you at the train station tomorrow before you leave.”

  Ian moved to the side of the bed and lifted Daniel into his arms. “We’ll wait for you in the carriage.”

  The moment Ian shut the door behind him, Nick asked, “Are you going to be okay, Abby?”

  “Yes, Nick. I have you and Daniel. You have stood by me in some difficult times. No matter what happens in the future, you will always be my big brother.” She took a deep fortifying breath. “Nothing will ever change that.”

  Nick stood and pulled Abby to her feet. He embraced her and whispered, “I love you, Sissy.”

  Tears flowed down her cheek, and she swiped at them with the back of her hand. She wondered how she could have any tears left. Nick wrapped his arm around her shoulders and led her from the room.

  When she came out, stared around the kitchen for what she knew to be the last time, her eyes rested on her father sitting at the table. Shoulders slumped in defeat, he looked old and tired. Abby’s heart hurt for him. She squeezed Nick’s hand before she moved away from him, and sat down across from the man she had always thought was her father. “Wait for me outside, Nick. I need to say goodbye to father.”

  Slowly, Jacob raised his head and looked at her. Eyes glazed with pain peered back at her. “I hope you understand why I never tried to find your real parents, Abigail. Your mother would never have forgiven me. I never could tell her no. She was the light of my life.”