A New Kind of Bliss

by Bettye Griffin

  I started to head for the back door when I heard voices and recognized Arden’s voice. “What are you in such a tearing hurry for?”

  “Emily says I can drive her to the store so I can get some practice in, since Daddy’s going to be late tonight.”

  “Ooh, can I come?”

  “Sure, but you’d better hurry up. We’re leaving right now.”

  I quickly headed for the guesthouse, not wanting Kirsten to have to wait for me and possibly get jumpy. A nervous driver could be hazardous to the health of my car.

  Both girls stood by my car in the driveway when I emerged from the guesthouse with my purse and keys, and to my surprise, so was Beverline.

  What does she want?

  She walked forward to meet me as I approached. “I know Kirsten’s excited,” she began, speaking in a low voice, “but are you sure this is a good idea, Emily? She’s not even licensed yet.”

  “It’s not like she asked me for the keys, Mrs. Wilson,” I pointed out. “I’m going to be sitting right beside her in the passenger seat, supervising every move she makes. That’s how she’ll learn.”

  “It’s just that Aaron was very stern with her and told her she’s not to operate a vehicle in which anyone outside the family is a passenger.”

  I got it now. Beverline wanted to drive home the point that I was an outsider.

  “I think that’s a very good rule,” I said. I wasn’t about to dispute Aaron’s word. Wouldn’t Beverline just love to tell him how I’d gone against the rules he’d set for his children. “But Kirsten has promised not to damage my car or cause any injuries to me, so I’m sure it’ll be okay.”

  She didn’t even crack a smile. “That’s precisely Aaron’s concern. Lawsuits.”

  “Mrs. Wilson,” I said, my patience gone, “I’m not going to sue, so you can stop worrying.”

  Kirsten called out just in time. “C’mon, Grandma. Can’t you talk with Emily later?”

  I brushed past Beverline, saying over my shoulder, “Excuse me, I’ve got an impatient driver waiting.”

  During our outing I gave Kirsten a few tips, like, “Try to hug the curb closer,” when she made a wide right turn, and “Don’t put on your blinker quite so soon before your turn. A half block is sufficient.” Arden sat transfixed in the backseat, as if preparing for her own lessons, which wouldn’t be for another three years.

  When Kirsten pulled up into the driveway she said, “Thanks a lot, Emily. You’re…you’re almost as good a teacher as Daddy.”

  “What about your grandma?”

  Kirsten made a face. “Grandma hollers at me. That’s why I stopped going out with her.”

  “Emily, are you going to have dinner with us?” Arden asked shyly when we got out of the car.

  I couldn’t tell if she really wanted me to join them or if she was just being polite. At any rate, I felt I’d been around enough for the day, and I didn’t feel like hearing any of Beverline’s negative comments about my allowing Kirsten to drive. “I think I’ll eat with my mother tonight,” I said. “I’ll be over later, after your father gets home.”

  It didn’t come as a surprise to me when Kirsten knocked on the guesthouse door the next afternoon, just as Mom and I were sitting down to dinner. “Hi, Emily!”

  “Well, hello there.” I waited expectantly.

  Kirsten looked almost embarrassed, as she should have, if she was about to say what I thought she would. “Um…Daddy’s home, but he’s kinda tired tonight. I was wondering if you’d take me driving again.”

  “That’s fine with me as long as it’s okay with your father. But Mom and I are about to have dinner.”

  “We’re going to eat in a few minutes, too. Can I come back when I’m done?”

  “That’ll work.”

  Kirsten turned to go, then turned around. “Thanks a lot, Emily.”

  I smiled as I closed the door. Could it be I was winning her over? Or would she forget about my help once she got her driver’s license?

  I went to The Big House with Kirsten after our spin. Aaron was sitting in his office, reviewing some notes. He smiled at me and removed his reading glasses when I tapped on the door, then came around from the back of the desk. “You look as good as a chocolate sundae,” he said as his arms went around me.

  I hadn’t expected this action. The door to his office was open, and Aaron rarely indulged in public displays of affection. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment.

  “I’m glad you came over early. I’m going to go upstairs to bed in a few minutes,” he said as we walked across the hall to the living room, arms around each other.

  “I guess you’re tired from last night.”

  “Yeah, it was a long day. But it was worth it. That scanner is fantastic.” He bent to open the top of the round globe, which revealed wine and liquor bottles and glassware. He poured Sauvignon Blanc for me and a Johnnie Walker for himself, then excused himself to get some water and ice cubes for his drink.

  When he returned he rejoined me on the couch. “I want to thank you for taking Kirsten out for driving practice these last two nights.”

  “She mentioned you were tired. Are you sure you didn’t steer her in my direction tonight?”

  “Trust me, I’m really bushed. But I did think it would be a good opportunity for you two to bond. And Arden, too, since she wants to do everything her sister does.” He sipped his drink, then looked at Diana’s portrait, which faced us. “You know, I think I’m going to move that picture to the girls’ room this weekend.”

  “Lots of luck with that move. You know it won’t go over big with Beverline.”

  I was just falling asleep when the phone rang. I frantically groped for the extension on the end table, hoping the ringing wouldn’t wake Mom up, since she’d always had difficulty staying asleep once she got there.

  It was my nephew Michael. He’d cut his ankle on the bottom edge of the door to the terrace of his studio apartment. “Emmie, I really don’t want to go to the ER,” he said. “My insurance charges a high co-pay for ER visits, probably because people use them as primary doctors. But it’s bleeding a lot. Is there any way you can come and look at it? I’ll give you forty bucks.”

  I heard the anxiety in his voice. “I’ll be there in about a half hour.”

  Once I was at Michael’s I examined the cut. “It’s pretty deep.”

  “Am I gonna need stitches?”

  “It could probably stand to be sutured, but I wouldn’t recommend it. The bottom of that door is probably filthy. Suturing it will only seal in the dirt, and that might lead to infection later on. I’m going to irrigate it with saline and bandage it for you.”

  “Um…I don’t have any saline, Emmie.” My sister’s and my brother’s older children simply called me by my first name, since I wasn’t all that much older than they were.

  “That’s all right. I brought some with me. Bandages, too. When’s the last time you had a tetanus shot?”

  “I had a booster about two years ago.” Michael chuckled. “Don’t tell me you brought that along, too?”

  I knew his joking was an effort to cover his obvious fear of just a few minutes before. I was glad to see he was feeling better. Even grown-ups got scared sometimes, and as he said, there’d been a lot of blood.

  “I think you’ll be fine,” I said as I taped the bandage in place over the cleaned-out wound. “Just make sure to watch out for any of those signs I told you about. And try to stay off it. At least tomorrow’s Friday. Take the day off if you can.”

  He kissed me as he pressed two twenties in my palm. “Thanks a lot, Emmie. You’re a lifesaver.”

  “So, where’d you rush off to last night?” Aaron asked.

  I put down my fork and stared at him. The light tone he used did nothing to disguise the fact that he was prying. And, since I hadn’t yet mentioned to him my nephew’s emergency, that meant he’d been spying on me. “You keeping tabs on me or something?”

  “No, of course not. I just wanted to make su
re everything was okay, especially with your mother.”

  “Aaron, I would have called you if there’d been any type of emergency with my mother. I mean, you are a doctor.” I tried to hide my annoyance. We were in a public place, a local seafood restaurant. I fought back the urge to tell him that I’d gone out and made forty dollars and see how’d he react. “It just so happens my nephew in Euliss cut his ankle on his terrace door. It was a deep cut, and there was a lot of blood. He wanted to avoid an ER visit, so he called me.” I stopped to take a deep breath. “Now, would you like to tell me how you knew I’d gone out, Mr. I’m Going Upstairs to Bed Now?”

  He appeared speechless for a few moments. “Wow.”

  “Wow, right. I’m very upset, Aaron.” It wasn’t like him to monitor my movements. I remembered that I’d worried about that momentarily as I was considering his offer for Mom and me to rent his guesthouse. Granted, that was because I was concerned with how I’d continue to see Teddy, an activity I’d since abandoned like a sinking ship. But I still didn’t like it. Aaron and I were supposed to be in love. That meant he wasn’t supposed to check up on me.

  “Calm down. I’d woken up and decided to put on the ten o’clock news when I saw headlights in the driveway. I got up and saw you pulling out.” He paused. “You know, Emily, I don’t ever want you to hesitate to call me if you need my help for anything, no matter what time it is, no matter where you are.”

  Maybe that was supposed to be reassuring, but to me he was recalling the incident—okay, the fabricated incident—with Teddy that Tanis so sneakily brought up New Year’s Eve. I’d thought I’d reassured Aaron when I’d looked him dead in the eye and lied to him about being involved with Teddy, but had he been thinking about that all these months? Did he lie awake last night waiting to see what time I came home and wondering if I’d gone to Euliss to meet Teddy because of lingering doubts?

  Damn Tanis.

  “Aaron, I want to go home,” I said.

  “Emily, I think you’re over—”

  I tossed my cloth napkin onto the table. “Maybe it’s best that you stay. I’ll get a cab.” I grabbed my purse and left.

  Chapter 25

  I still steamed as I unlocked the door to the guesthouse. I hadn’t had to answer to anyone for anything I’d done for many years. I’d be damned if I’d begin now. Who was Aaron to start acting like he was my father? Was he confusing me with Kirsten or Arden? I was forty-three years old, not some damn teenager.

  I heard the sound of voices as soon as I swung open the door, voices that sounded too real to be coming from the television set. The scent of collard greens filled the air. Perhaps Mom was contributing a dish for a church potluck or something.

  The voices came from the kitchen. I closed the door quietly and headed in that direction, stopping in my tracks at the sight of my mother wearing an apron and one of her prettiest blouses—the kind she took off immediately after returning home—standing over a pot, a tall, heavyset gentleman spoon-feeding her. Mom was giggling like a fourteen-year-old. And neither of them even noticed me.

  I quickly stepped back into the living room, then said loudly, “Mom, I’m home!”

  Seconds later she appeared in the doorway, her guest close behind. “Oh, hello, Emily. I wasn’t expecting you.”

  “I know. Aaron and I had a fight. There didn’t seem much point in continuing the evening.” I turned my gaze on her companion. “I didn’t know you were having company,” I stated innocently, trying not to smile at Mom’s visible nervousness, the way she kept rubbing her palms up and down a five-inch span of her thighs.

  “Emily, this is Henry Johnson. Henry, this is my daughter Emily.”

  We met each other halfway, our arms extended. Henry Johnson was a big bear of a man who dwarfed my mother. He’d lost most of his white hair, but the wide sideburns and big belly reminded me of Santa Claus. “Nice to meet you, Mr. Johnson.”

  “Likewise, Emily. Your mother’s told me quite a bit about you.”

  I didn’t point out the obvious, that she hadn’t said a word about him. Instead, I sniffed the leafy pork-tinted air. “Are you two cooking?”

  “Yes,” Mom said, a little louder than necessary. “You see, Henry and I met at church, and one day we were discussing cooking. Henry said he makes the best collards in New Rochelle, and I told him I make the best collards in Euliss, and well…we thought it would be fun to have sort of a cook-off.”

  “Actually, Emily, now that you’re here you can serve as a judge,” Henry suggested.

  I still couldn’t believe it. My nearly eighty-year-old mother had a gentleman friend? A friend she’d invited over when she thought I’d be gone for the evening? That sounded like something I would have done when I was seventeen. Had we changed places? “Uh…sure.”

  Mom retreated back into the kitchen, with Henry following. “Now, Ruby, she can’t see which greens came out of which pot, or she’ll know which ones are yours.”

  “All right. I’ll just spoon some from each into a bowl.” Mom turned to me. “Emily, you go sit in the living room so you can’t see.”

  When we saw each other in the kitchen Sunday morning, Mom wore an expression of a kid who’d been caught munching on potato chips when she’d been told not to snack before dinner. “Well, what’d you think of Henry?”

  “He seemed very nice. But why didn’t you tell me you had a date?”

  “It wasn’t a date, Emmie. We were cooking, that’s all. And I’m still mad at you for saying his greens were better than mine.”

  I knew she’d have something to say about that. “I can’t help it, Mom. Those were the best greens I’ve ever tasted in my life. What does he put in them?”

  “He won’t tell me,” she said, obviously sulking. Then she changed the subject. “So what happened with you and Aaron?”

  My jaws immediately tightened as I bit into my English muffin. “Oh, he made me so mad!” I recounted the events of the previous evening.

  Mom listened intently. “Emmie, I know you treasure your independence, but do you think you might have overreacted a bit?”

  “No, I don’t. I know cheating is a serious offense, Mom.” My ex-husband’s duplicity still hurt, even after all these years. “But if I let him off the hook too easily he’d think he could start questioning me at any time. And I can’t have that.”

  Teddy showed up at the Norman medical offices the next morning. “It’s April, Emily, and I’ve seen you maybe five times since New Year’s, with not many more words than that between us in all that time. How about lunch today?”

  “Sure,” I said without hesitation. It was true that I’d always managed to be in a rush to get somewhere whenever we saw each other in the building or parking lot. He brought back too many memories of lustful nights of abandon so different from the orderly sex Aaron and I had, and I still didn’t trust myself around him. But it was time to stop ducking him. He deserved better.

  The timing of his invitation had an undeniable irony to it. I had used the excuse of being on the outs with Aaron for sleeping with Teddy, and Aaron and I had just had our first real fight last night. Regardless of my dissatisfaction with Aaron’s performance in the bedroom, my dalliance with Teddy had come dangerously close to ending it all, and thanks to Tanis, the seeds of doubt had been planted in Aaron’s head. I knew myself well enough to know I wasn’t going to chance that happening again. I was a woman in love, even if I was still pissed off at the object of my affection at the moment…and at myself for previously being unable to stay out of Teddy’s bed. I’d known Teddy most of my life. The sexual side of our relationship was behind us. We were too much alike to ever be able to carry off a romantic relationship, but we were still friends, and hopefully would always be.

  We went to the café on the street level. We’d barely put in our orders when Wayne came in, wearing his work uniform. We waved him over. The look of surprise on his face at seeing us together told me that he, too, recalled Tanis’s so-called drunken outbursts of nearly four
months ago.

  “What a coincidence,” I said. “This is the first time Teddy and I have spent any time together all year, and who do we see but you, Wayne.”

  “Yeah, how ’bout that. I had a doctor’s appointment to get my blood pressure checked. I figured I’d pick up one of their steak sandwiches and take it back to work with me.” He flagged a waitress and placed his take-out order. “I’ll be sitting here with my friends. Can you bring it here when it’s ready?”

  “Certainly, sir.”

  “So,” Teddy said after the waitress left, “what’s new with you, Wayne? Are you still seeing Tanis?”

  I averted my eyes. I knew from Rosalind, who talked to Tanis regularly, that Tanis was no longer seeing Wayne. According to Rosalind, Tanis had decided Wayne was getting too serious and she’d dumped him. She’d since found a new boy toy, a twenty-nine-year-old technician who worked on her show.

  “No, not for a while now,” Wayne was saying. “Not since the middle of January. You know, ever since I saw Tanis at Rosalind’s dinner party last spring I was just…” his voice trailed off as he remembered with a rueful little smile.

  “Yeah, I know that feeling,” Teddy said, his eyes on me.

  I frantically shook my head, not wanting Wayne to notice.

  Wayne grunted. “We started seeing each other the night of our class reunion. But it didn’t take too long before I started to notice, shall we say, flaws in her personality. For one, she always had an excuse to keep from introducing me to her kids. She also seemed a little inconsiderate. I mean, she knows I work for Con Ed. She wanted to go out to dinner two or three times a week, and I’m not talking Applebee’s, either.” He shook his head. “I must have put over a thousand dollars on my Visa card. But when I figured out that she really wanted some other dude, I let her go.”

  I blinked. “Wayne, are you saying you broke it off?”