Love & Loss (The Austin Series)

by C. J. Fallowfield

‘Look at you sweetheart, you look so happy.’

  ‘I am Mum, really happy.’ I turned to give Gerry a hug and kiss and turned around to look at Gabe, who for once looked totally lost. I wondered if he’d ever done this, if this was this a first for him, meeting the parents.

  ‘Mum, Dad I’d like you to meet my boyfriend Gabe,’ I announced. He stepped forwards to shake hands with Mum who laughed and grabbed him into a bear hug.

  ‘Lovely to meet you properly this time Gabe.’

  ‘You too Mrs Page,’ he replied as he regained his composure and kissed her on both cheeks before turning to shake hands with Gerry. ‘Mr Page,’ he nodded. ‘Thank you both for allowing me to stay.’

  ‘In the spare room,’ reminded Gerry and Mum rolled her eyes and gave me a wink making me laugh.

  ‘Right Gabe, let me give you a hand with the cases,’ Gerry smiled.

  ‘Don’t worry Sir, I can handle them.’

  ‘Less of the Mr and Mrs Page and Sir, call us Gerry and Jacqui,’ he replied with a warm smile. Calling Gerry “Sir” would have just earned Gabe some major brownie points. ‘I’ll help with the bags, I understand that you’ve just had major shoulder surgery? I don’t want you overdoing it, besides it will give us a chance to chat.’

  I shot a look at Mum, but she just smiled, took my hand and pulled me inside. I looked back over my shoulder and mouthed ‘Sorry’ at Gabe, who looked at me totally thrown.

  ‘Ok Mum what’s going on?’ I asked as she took me into our large open plan kitchen diner and parked me at the island.

  ‘You’ve never been this serious about a boy before Mia, Gerry’s just going to have a chat with him and make sure he treats you right.’

  ‘Mum,’ I protested.

  ‘You’re his little girl Mia, well as good as, he’s looked after you since you were three and you even changed your surname to his. He feels very protective towards you. So how are you? You’ve lost weight.’

  ‘I’m fine Mum, I’ve just been exercising a lot so I’ve toned up.’

  ‘Exercising? Is that what they’re calling it nowadays?’ she winked as she put the kettle on and I blushed. ‘I’ve done a big coq au vin with mash and savoy cabbage for dinner, so if you let Lexi know to bring Doug over for eight. It gives us a chance to chat to you and Gabe first.’

  ‘So where is he?’ I asked, surveying the room nervously.

  ‘Mr Biggles? I left him in the lounge, you know how excited he gets with visitors coming and he knows something’s going on as I’ve been cleaning all the bedrooms.’

  ‘Can we leave him in the utility? You know he hates me.’

  ‘The utility?’ She looked at me mortified. ‘Mia, how could you? This is a much his home as yours. What does Gabe drink?’

  ‘At this time of the day a cup of tea, no sugar. Let me make it.’

  ‘No, you’ve had a long drive so just relax, I’ll do it when they’re done talking. How’s he doing now?’

  ‘His shoulder’s coming on really well,’ I nodded. No way was I telling her of his other issues, I still had to find the right time to tell her that I’d had an operation and about my fertility issues, and that wasn’t going to go down well at all. We chatted about how my lectures were going and I got one in return on putting more effort in. About twenty minutes later the men appeared, laughing, Gerry with his hand on the back of Gabe’s shoulder and I let out a sigh of relief, I could tell that he liked him.

  ‘You picked a good one here Mia,’ smiled Gerry confirming my assessment and he kissed the top of my head as I beamed.

  ‘I think so, but he picked me Gerry.’

  I raised my eyebrow at Gabe as I flicked my head in Gerry’s direction, but he just grabbed my hand and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to know what they’d been talking about for so long.

  ‘Let’s go in the lounge, we’ve got a nice fire going and Mr Biggles will be wondering what’s going on,’ suggested Mum.

  ‘Mr Biggles?’ asked Gabe looking surprised.

  ‘The Yorkshire terrier, Mum’s baby,’ I confirmed. ‘I hate him,’ I added in a whisper.

  ‘I heard that Mia, I told you he feeds off your hostility. He’s not nipped anyone since you’ve been away.’

  I sighed and shook my head and we headed into the lounge where the log burner was chucking out so much heat it felt like a sauna. Within seconds the little bugger had bitten my ankle and I cursed, jumped onto the sofa and pulled my feet up and out of the way. I watched amazed as Gabe sat next to me and Mr Biggles sat at his feet wagging his tail, then rolled onto his back for a tummy tickle.

  ‘I told you, he hates me,’ I moaned as Gabe chuckled and put his arm around me and kissed my temple. Mum and Gerry sat on the opposite sofa and I saw her smile as she studied us, making me blush.

  ‘So Gabe, what are you studying at Uni?’ asked Gerry.

  I put my head on Gabe’s shoulder as they chatted and I realised how odd this was for all of us, Kai had only ever been in the hall when he’d come to pick me up. No boyfriend had ever made it this far into the house, and I don’t think Mum and Gerry had ever seen me hold a boys hand, let alone snuggle up to, or kiss one. I texted Lexi to ask her to arrive at eight and Gerry opened some champagne, which we sipped while we all chatted awaiting their arrival, before settling down to dinner. I kept catching Mum smiling as she looked at the four of us. Doug seemed to be going down well with them both too, but with their public school manners it was hard for anyone not to like them. Lexi was beaming, she’d missed my parents as much as me. We stayed at the dining table sharing tales of Lexi and I growing up, which made us cringe and the boys laugh. When I started yawning at eleven Gabe suggested we should head to bed. Doug said his goodbyes and we arranged to pick him up at ten and I chuckled as we headed upstairs accompanied by Gerry. He took Gabe to the spare room next to the master suite.

  ‘I’m sure you’ll be comfy in here Gabe, the bathroom’s that door opposite the stairs,’ he indicated as he loitered.

  ‘Dad, I’d like to say goodnight to him.’ I gave him a look. ‘In private.’

  ‘O right, well don’t be too long, you look tired sweetheart.’ He kissed my forehead and gave me a warning look, before shaking Gabe’s hand and giving Lexi a kiss and heading down.

  ‘God I thought he was going to sleep in a camp bed outside Gabe’s room to make sure he wasn’t coming out,’ giggled Lexi. ‘Have you checked for a trip wire linked to the alarm?’

  ‘I wouldn’t put it past him,’ I laughed.

  ‘Right, night you two, see you in the morning.’ She kissed us both and headed into her room, on the opposite side of the house, next to mine.

  ‘Alone at last,’ I smiled as I put my arms around Gabe’s neck. ‘Mum and Gerry don’t go to bed late, so give it about half an hour after they’ve crashed and you can sneak into mine.’

  ‘Christ I feel like James Bond or something, secret mission accepted Miss Page,’ he replied giving me a quick peck on the lips.

  ‘Hmmm, we need to play out that fantasy one night, me tied up and you coming in to rescue me in your tuxedo.’

  ‘Deal,’ he grinned and kissed me quickly again.

  ‘So what were you and Gerry chatting about earlier?’

  ‘He took me to the study and gave me the protective father speech.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Yes, basically along the lines of hurt my little princess and I’ll track you down and kill you as she’s been through enough, though not quite as scary as when Lexi did it.’

  ‘O bless him, that’s so sweet. Well I think you’ve made a good impression so far, see you later horn monster,’ I winked and gave him a quick kiss back. ‘Bathrooms all yours, Lexi and I share an adjoining en-suite.’

  ‘See you later,’ he winked.

  Twenty minutes later I was curled up in my old bed after having checked out my room and quickly hidden any pictures that Gabe might disapprove of. As I lay waiting for him I felt my eyes closing and drifted off.

  The Ex Factor


  I was woken up by my iPhone alarm at 8 a.m. I lay there, confused for a minute, looking up at the light oak beams above my head and remembered I was at home, my old home. I frowned, not recalling Gabe coming in last night and rolled over to find his side of the bed empty, and it didn’t look as if his pillow had even been slept on. Maybe he’d fluffed it up before sneaking out this morning.

  I hopped in the shower and quickly dressed in some casual clothes and pulled my hair into a pony tail. I could hear noise from the kitchen downstairs and knocked on Lexi’s door to wake her up before knocking on Gabe’s and opening it. He was fast asleep on his front, hugging a pillow to his face. I sat on the edge of the bed and ran my fingers through his hair and he opened his eyes startled.

  ‘Morning,’ I smiled.

  ‘Morning?’ he asked, shocked.

  ‘Yes it’s nearly half eight, I don’t even remember you coming to bed or sneaking out.’

  ‘Because I didn’t,’ he mumbled embarrassed. ‘Shit sorry Mia, I must have fallen asleep waiting for your parents to go to bed.’

  ‘Gabe Austin,’ I chastised.

  ‘Well it’s not like you noticed, you could have come to get me,’ he muttered as he sat up.

  ‘Fair point,’ I nodded as I eyed his toned muscular chest. ‘Are you nude under there?’

  ‘Yes, nude and hard. I dreamed about you,’ he smiled.

  ‘That’s so not fair, teasing me,’ I pouted. ‘You slept ok then?’

  ‘Yes,’ he said with a surprised frown. ‘I don’t normally sleep well without you, I don’t know why that happened.’

  ‘You’re tired and unwell Gabe, it’s caught up with you,’ I suggested as I trailed a finger over his shoulder scar. ‘Maybe you feel more relaxed here, like you did in Scotland, because you’re with me and there are no threats here.’

  ‘Hmmm maybe so. It could be these new meds I’m on too.’ He grabbed my finger and kissed it, his eyes flitting down to my breasts. ‘You’re looking extra pert today.’

  ‘Push up bra, wait until you see my going out outfit for tonight. Come on, get showered and ready and see you down in the kitchen. It’s torture seeing you all naked and sexy like this.’

  The five of us enjoyed a big fry up before we left Mum and Gerry behind and I drove to the B&B to pick up Doug and we headed into town. We decided to stick together and Lexi and I walked them around telling them stories of our favourite places as we pointed them out, like the pool hall, our favourite pub and the nightclub we’d be going to later. We had a burger and fries for lunch and decided to go to the cinema to see the latest Hobbit movie before heading home for a light dinner and getting ready to go out.

  ‘Mia, can I come in?’ called Lex as I sat at my dressing table finishing my makeup.

  ‘Yes I’m almost done.’

  ‘Holy crap, that’s not your usual Christmas outfit,’ she exclaimed as she looked me up and down.

  ‘I wanted to look sexy for Gabe, it’s been two weeks of no sex and I don’t know how much more I can take, so I hoping he won’t be able to resist me in this. You like?’ I asked as I stood up and gave a twirl. I’d purchased a new corset style mini Santa dress with white fluff around the base, white over the knee socks and had on a pair of black Mary Jane ankle strap shoes. I’d freshly washed my hair, styling it into loose waves and had put on my Santa hat and some sparkly makeup.

  ‘You could have said you were going for the sexy look,’ she pouted. ‘I look stupid next to you.’

  ‘You don’t,’ I replied, trying to stifle a giggle. Lexi had gotten her green felt elf outfit out of retirement, along with her green and red face paint. As if she weren’t tall enough already, a mini dress with stripy red and white tights really wasn’t helping. ‘You just look like The Hulk in a Christmas outfit.’

  ‘Do I have time to change?’

  ‘No,’ I exclaimed, ‘we’re late already.’

  ‘Why don’t the boys have to dress up? It’s not fair,’ she sulked.

  ‘It’s our tradition Lex, none of us had boyfriends when we started this.’ I grabbed my red velvet pouch bag and we headed down to the lounge. I was pleased to see Gabe’s reaction as he looked me up and down, hot carnal lust, but I noticed Mum raise an eyebrow as she caught him eyeing me up. Gerry gave Lexi and I both a look and shook his head, but knew better than to say anything. We’d had many an argument as teenagers over what he considered to be inappropriate going out attire.

  ‘Come on then, I’d better drive you in, are you getting a taxi back or ringing me?’ he asked.

  ‘I think we’ll get a taxi thanks, not sure how late we’ll be,’ I replied, drinking in Gabe in his sexy grey jeans, fitted black shirt and bomber jacket.

  ‘Don’t forget your sister is over for lunch tomorrow, don’t be too hung over,’ Mum warned.

  ‘What? Georgie’s coming?’ Shit, when was that arranged? I still hadn’t told Mum about my op, what if Georgie dropped me in it?

  ‘You think you’d be a bit happier about seeing your sister after three months Mia, really.’ Mum shook her head and I sighed, I was going to have to talk to her about it all tomorrow now for sure.

  ‘Ok baby?’ Gabe asked as he grabbed my hand.

  ‘Yes,’ I smiled up at him.

  ‘You look very sexy,’ he murmured in my ear making me smile even more.

  ‘This brings back a few memories,’ Gerry smiled as he pulled up in the town square to drop us all off. ‘If you want a lift home ring before midnight, otherwise lose my number and I’ll see you at breakfast.’

  ‘Thanks’ we all called in unison making him laugh as he waved and headed off.

  ‘Sexy outfit Mia,’ grinned Doug, earning himself a punch in the arm from Lexi who scowled at him. ‘What? It is sexy. I already told you yours looked nice when you knocked on the B&B door.’

  ‘So I get a “nice” and Mia gets a “sexy”? Thanks a lot,’ she snapped and marched off ahead of us with Doug running to catch her up leaving Gabe and I laughing.

  ‘So sexy Mia, where are you taking me tonight?’ he asked, giving me a kiss on the temple as he tucked his arm around me.

  ‘To our favourite pub where we’ll have a few with some of our old boarding school friends and their boyfriends, then we’re going onto Onyx for some dancing later.’

  ‘Hmmm,’ he frowned.

  ‘Hmmm what? Did you not want to come out?’

  ‘No it’s not that, I’m happy to be out with you, I’m just finding this no sex thing harder than I thought I would. It doesn’t help you dressed up like that and the thought of you dancing, the way you dance …’ his brow creased again as he stalled. ‘It’s going to be hard.’

  ‘Gabe please, you want sex, I want sex, why can’t we just do it? I miss you so much. It’s been two weeks.’

  ‘No,’ he said firmly. ‘It’s not time yet. Is this the pub?’

  ‘Yes.’ I held my hand out to him, which he took. I was kind of nervous, being back home and introducing him to my friends. In less than a week it would be our three month anniversary and would make this my longest and most serious relationship. I desperately wanted all my friends to like him, there again why wouldn’t they?

  ‘So are we doing this or what?’ he smiled as I stood at the door biting my lip.

  ‘Sorry, it’s just a big deal introducing you to my friends, I need a second.’

  Of course I needn’t have worried, everyone loved him, Doug too, and Lexi and I both got grilled when they both went with the other boys to buy another round of drinks at the bar.

  ‘Mia, Gabe’s bloody gorgeous,’ sighed Mandy.

  ‘Hmmm if anything goes wrong toss him my way,’ nodded Jess. ‘I’m not too proud for sloppy seconds of that or Doug.’

  ‘He adores you Mia,’ added Lizzie with an elbow to my ribs. ‘He can’t keep his hands or eyes off you. Look he’s looking over now,’ she laughed and I blushed as they all started giggling while Lexi rolled her eyes.

  ‘I know, I’m really lucky and he’s s
o protective and caring,’ I sighed as I smiled back at him.

  ‘Tell me you’ve at least lost your virginity and you’re finally shagging?’ asked Mandy and all eyes turned to look at me. I went bright red and bit my lip as I smiled and a loud cheer went around the table, which made everyone in the pub look around.

  ‘Girls,’ I protested.

  ‘Tell me it’s good, I bet it’s good, he looks like he’d be good,’ Lizzie sighed as she looked his way again, her chin resting in her hand.

  ‘No, it’s not good,’ I said with a shake of my head as I looked over at him and heard them gasp. ‘It’s bloody sensational,’ I giggled and they all cheered again. I nearly choked as Jess slapped me on the back.

  ‘How the hell did you get him for your first and I got Squeaky Pearson?’ Jess laughed.

  ‘No idea,’ I replied sincerely. ‘But I know how lucky I am.’

  ‘So you enjoyed it first time?’ Lizzie asked.

  ‘Yes, but Christ I hurt the next day, all over.’

  ‘Did you come first time? I didn’t, Squeaky had a high intolerance for stamina as well as a high pitched voice,’ giggled Jess.

  ‘I did,’ I nodded. ‘It was amazing.’

  ‘Thank your lucky stars you don’t share a house with them guys,’ grizzled Lexi. ‘The two of them are at it all the time and you want to hear the bloody noise that comes from their room and as if that weren’t bad enough he makes her come every time, more than once.’

  ‘No,’ came a chorus of voices as everyone looked at me with jealousy all over their faces.

  ‘Doesn’t everyone?’ I asked surprised.

  ‘NO,’ came another chorus and I tried to keep the smug look off my face, not that I was doing a lot of coming at the moment, but he did usually make me do it, a lot.

  ‘Girls please don’t embarrass me in front of him, they’re coming back,’ I begged. I excused myself and gave Gabe a kiss which earned me another cheer from our table and I shook my head in despair as I headed to the ladies. I was on my way back to our table when I heard my name.

  ‘Mia? Mia Page? Is that you?’

  I turned around and my heart skipped its steady beat. Standing in front of me, looking every bit as gorgeous as I remembered him, was Tyler Jackson. Tyler was my teenage crush, no crush was too tame a word for what I’d felt for him, it was an infatuation, I was obsessed with him. He was the reason I was a decent swimmer, because I’d found every excuse to go to the pool hoping he’d notice me. I felt myself blush as I looked up at him, he had to be the same height as Gabe and looked like he had a body to rival his too. He’d always been toned in his swim trunks back then.