The Rennillia Series: Volumes 1-5

by M. Sembera

  Smiling at him, I shrugged.

  Being persistent, he said, “Whatever you want to do.”

  After a second, I asked, “Really?”

  As he nodded I stated, “It’s not very honeymoon-ish but I really want to move my stuff into your room so when you go back to work I can decorate mine for Sophia.”

  Smiling, he said, “Are you sure? Your room has a much bigger closet.”

  Agreeing, I said, “I know, but after last night and this morning, I’m kinda partial to yours.”

  Smiling wide, he replied, “Let’s get started then. I want to take you out tonight for dinner.”

  Upstairs, I followed Hert back and forth from room to room, since I was forbidden to lift or carry anything. When he finally decided he did need help, a call to Jackson was made.

  Teasing him, I said, “I would have never believed you would want to share our honeymoon with Jacks.”

  Giving me an unhappy glare, Hert replied, “Oh, so you don’t want to share a room.”

  Laughing I stuck my tongue out at him. Suddenly I was lifted off the ground, spun around and set on the bed. Laughing wildly as Hert held me down tickling me, I couldn’t imagine being happier. When he stopped we both laid there laughing for a while.

  Propping up on his elbow, Hert said, “I think I’m done for today. Jackson is going to help me move the dresser tomorrow. I’m going to take a shower. Start getting ready, we have a reservation for dinner.”

  Sitting up I asked, “Should I get dressed up? If you made a reservation it must be some place fancy.”

  With a wicked smile he replied, “Maybe you could wear that dress you wore when we had dinner with Roberts’ parents.”

  Leaning in, I inquired, “Now that we are married will you tell me how I looked in it?”

  Gently pulling me closer, he informed, “After dinner I’ll show you.”

  Feeling warm and tingly all over I gave Hert a quick kiss and stated, “Go take your shower.”

  Dinner was fantastic from start to finish. When the maître d called us Mr. and Mrs. Herterand, I was elated. We sat very close together at a private table. Just before desert, Hert gave me earrings to match my ring and necklace. By the time we left the restaurant my mind was clouded by a romantic haze. Being Hert’s wife seemed to exceed every expectation I had for my life.

  Arriving back at the house we snuggled up together on the couch. Sliding my fingers in and out of Hert’s hand I wondered if it would always be like this. Thinking eventually we would get used to each other, I decided even if we had a bad day it would still be better than anything else.

  Kissing my forehead, Hert asked, “Have you thought of a middle name yet?”

  Shaking my head, I suggested, “What if we don’t give her one.”

  Hert gave me a confused look as I explained, “That way when she grows up and gets married Herterand can be her middle name.”

  Giving me a strange look, he said, “That’s, uh different. But okay, I don’t know anything about girl names anyway.”

  Smiling, I suggested, “Well, maybe one day we will have a boy and you can pick the name.”

  Hert appeared uncomfortable as he replied, “I don’t think so Renni.”

  Pulling away, I sat up questioning, “What do you mean?”

  I could see his whole body stiffen as he explained, “Renni I can’t have kids.”

  Not using as much tact as the situation called for I blurted out, “Since when?”

  He snapped back, “Since I got the chicken pox when I was fourteen.”

  Feeling guilty over my initial lack of compassion, I scooted closer suggesting, “Well maybe…”

  Stopping me, he said, “Renni,” shaking his head, he appeared distressed as he eluded, “I should have told you before we got married.”

  Disheartened by his assumption, I replied, “It wouldn’t have made a difference. I just didn’t know that’s all. To be honest I never thought about having kids until I found out I was pregnant.”

  Hesitant, he asked, “So you’re not upset?”

  Shaking my head, I confirmed, “No, I’m not upset,” before sliding onto his lap and gently kissed him as I asked, “Are you?”

  Hert placed his hand on my belly telling me, “I would have been.”

  It made perfect sense now. In the back of my mind I had wondered how Hert could truly be so accepting of her. Now I knew. The night he came home from the bar wanting to touch my stomach saying ‘I’m going to be a dad’. After my ultrasound he was ecstatic when the words 'Herterand Girl' were at the top of the picture. This was something impossible for him, something that under normal circumstances he would never have. What a miracle our little Sophia was and not in the all 'babies are a miracle' way. She wasn’t born yet and already she had changed our lives for the better. From that first day I found out about her, things were different. No matter how difficult life had been before and what we all went through, I now understood that all of it brought us to Sophia.

  My first official day of being Hert's wife was almost at an end.

  I rested my head on Hert’s shoulder, whispering, “I love you”.

  He kissed my forehead, repeating, “I love you.”

  Having the day quickly catching up with me, I wrapped my arms around Hert’s neck and kissed his cheek, “Your pregnant wife needs to get out of this dress.”

  Hert stood up lifting me with him.

  As he carried me upstairs he agreed, “I was just thinking the same thing.”

  Chapter 23

  Over the next few months we managed to develop a routine. Hert was back at work and Jackson faithfully stopped by once a week for lunch. Sophia’s room was finished, all it needed was her to make it complete. My doctor’s appointments were now every two weeks. Every morning and evening Hert greeted Sophia immediately after me. Always asking, ‘How are my girls?’ when he returned home from work. It seemed as though the bigger my belly grew the deeper we fell in love with her. I talked to her all day long and Hert read a book to her every night. When Hert would return home from work the second I saw him Sophia would start kicking hard. Apparently, she was just as excited to have him home as I was.

  At thirty two weeks, Hert decided it would be best to work from home just in case I went into labor. At my last appointment I was put on partial bed rest because I was already starting to dilate. It appeared she was as anxious to meet us as we were to meet her. Even though Hert stayed busy with work, I enjoyed having him home

  It didn’t take long before I was bored out of my mind. I decided to use Hert’s big envelopes of pictures to make a scrap book of all of us for Sophia, starting with the picture of Hert and I at the pond. I found old pictures of the four of us and since Erin had sent me the pictures from the wedding, I added those. Leaving the last page blank so I could add pictures of Sophia with everyone after she was born, I was growing anxious. There was absolutely nothing to do all day. Our honeymoon phase ended the day Dr. Brin put me on partial bed rest. I wasn't sure if it was the lack of sex or the impending due date, Hert grew more anxious with every passing moment. If I sneezed he was ready to take me to the hospital. I guess I should have thought it was endearing but I found it irritating.

  By week thirty four Hert convinced Dr. Brin to come to the house for my appointments. The only thing I had left to look forward to was having Sophia and even then, some days I wished I would go into labor just so I could get out of the house. When Emerson called to see how things were going, I practically begged him to come back just so I would have someone else to talk to. Jackson wasn’t any better than Hert in the way of panicking over the smallest of things. Most of my time was spent either sleeping or being annoyed.

  Finally Emerson called and said things were slow enough there that he was able to come back for a few weeks. Excited there would be something new going on in the house, I felt energized. Fighting Hert every step of the way I was up and around almost all day. After several attempts by him to make me slow down or lie down, I finally
snapped.

  Seeing a basket of clothes in the corner, I decided to fold them and put them away.

  Hert walked in and discouraged, “You shouldn’t be doing that.”

  Tired of being told what I could and could not do, I yelled, “Then what should I be doing? Please tell me what I’m allowed to do!” as he looked at me not knowing what to say I continued shouting, “I am so sick and tired of you hovering all over me all the time! Geez, I’m not running up and down the stairs! I’m putting clothes away! There is never anything for me to do! I can’t go anywhere! I don’t even get to leave for doctor appointments any more. Just let me finish folding clothes, go back and do your work and uhh, leave me alone!”

  Hert slowly stepped forward, placing his hand on my shoulder, he condescendingly asked, “Are you having a bad day?”

  Never in my life have I had such an overpowering urge to strangle someone.

  Slapping his hand away from me I let out a frustrated, “Ugh,” stomping out of the room.

  I slammed the door behind myself and went downstairs.

  Sitting on the couch, I put my head in my hands and started to cry.

  Hert sat down next to me on the couch apologizing, “I’m sorry Renni. I know this has got to be frustrating for you. Look, Roberts will be here tomorrow and then maybe that will give you something to do. I really am sorry. I can’t help it. It’s getting so close to you having Sophia, I’m getting really nervous. I don’t want anything bad to happen. To either of ya’ll.”

  Taking a deep breath, I conceded, “I know. I’m just so ready to have her and for things to go back to normal between us. On top of everything else, I miss you.”

  Confused, he asked, “How is that? I’m here all the time.”

  Trying to explain, I replied, “Yea you are but you aren’t acting like my husband. It’s not the same. I want it to be like it was before.”

  Leaning in, Hert softly kissed me saying, “I hadn’t realized I was making you feel that way. I love you. I still really want you. I guess I’ve been consuming myself with work and making sure you’re okay because it distracts me. We haven’t been able to be together and it’s still going to be a while after you have her before we can.”

  Understanding where he was coming from I suggested, “Maybe it would help us both if you stopped working for the day and we spent some time together. No pregnancy related conversation. Just me and you, while it’s still just me and you,” as he nodded I asked, “When is Emerson getting in tomorrow?”

  Hert replied, “About two o’clock. In fact I need to drop some papers off at The Office so I will pick him up. Jackson was coming over anyway, I’ll just get him to come a little early in case…” I glared at him as he caught himself, “Sorry. To keep you company until I get back.”

  Smiling, I offered, “I’ll make dinner.”

  Hert kissed me and for the first time in a month just said, “Okay.”

  Happy to have Hert acting normal again, even if it more than likely would only last the night, I set the table so we could eat in the dining room. After dinner, we snuggled up on the couch. Finding it a little difficult at first to find a topic that didn’t include things that would frustrate us further, we settled on childhood memories. We laughed agreeing it was a miracle we survived all the dangerous things we did. It wasn’t late but I was getting tired.

  Yawning, I said, “I think I’m ready for bed.”

  Hert wrapped his arm around me and gently kissing me replied, “You’re so beautiful,” as his kisses trailed down my neck he whispered, “So beautiful.”

  I wasn’t sure what his intentions were but it was nice feeling wanted again. It wasn’t long before his forehead was pressed to mine with a sigh.

  Trying to lighten his frustration, I stated, “Now Mr. Herterand don’t get yourself all worked up.”

  He started to laugh.

  Hugging me tight, he replied, “Let’s go to bed.”

  Chapter 24

  Feeling a little nauseated when I woke up, I skipped breakfast. After taking a shower, I felt better. Downstairs, Hert brought me flowers and kissed me passionately.

  Surprised, I asked, “What’s gotten into you?”

  With a wide smile Hert replied, “I don’t want you to ever forget how much I love you and that I always want you.”

  My heart melted at his reassurance. Suddenly Hert’s expression changed.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked.

  Placing his hand on my cheek, he questioned, “Are you feeling alright?” as I nodded he persisted, “Are you sure? You look really pale.”

  I replied, “Oh I was feeling sick when I woke up so I didn’t eat breakfast. I probably just need to eat something.”

  Looking unsure, Hert said, “Well I think you better eat then. Jackson will be here in about twenty minutes.”

  Making myself a piece of toast, I asked, “Are you going by The Office first? I mean before you pick up Em.”

  Searching my eyes, he replied, “Why? Do you want Jackson to get him instead? The papers can wait. If you...”

  Stopping him, I said, “No I was just wondering,” before taking a bite of my toast and assuring, “I’m already starting to feel better.”

  I could tell Hert didn’t really believe me but was being extra agreeable after my meltdown yesterday.

  Jackson walked in the back door, smiling as always.

  He glanced over at me stating, “Hey mama! You look like your fixin’ to pop!”

  As I rolled my eyes, Hert advised Jackson to call The Office if I needed anything and that after the airport he was coming straight home. Jackson agreed and Hert kissed me goodbye before leaving. I started to get up but had to sit right back down.

  Jackson quickly got up asking, “Are you okay?”

  Nodding, I replied, “Yea. I think I got up to fast. I feel dizzy.”

  I could hear the panic in his voice as he questioned, “Should I call Hert?”

  Shaking my head I stood up much slower this time.

  “See I’m okay. I’m just going to go sit on the couch,” I shared.

  Jackson promptly followed me asking, “Do you need anything?”

  Starting to feel woozy again, I said, “Actually can you bring me some club soda?”

  Not answering, he immediately ran back to the kitchen.

  Sipping my drink, I said, “She is moving around all crazy today. It kinda hurts.”

  Jackson looked petrified as he speculated, “Are you having contractions?”

  Placing my hands on my belly, I replied, “Um, I don’t know.”

  Almost shouting at me, he questioned, “How can you not know?”

  Yelling back, I declared, “I don’t know! I’ve never had a baby before!” then taking a moment to calm down I said, “Okay, I know. I think I’m supposed to keep track of how often it hurts. The closer together the pains are the closer I am to having a baby.”

  Sitting down was too uncomfortable so I decided to walk around. Jackson and I both watched the clock noticing the pains were consistently seven minutes apart.

  Jackson suggested, “I think I should call Hert.”

  Trying not to overreact, I said, “Just wait he’s probably not even at The Office anymore, seven minutes apart is still pretty far right?” Wide-eyed, he stared at me as I shouted, “Right!” As he shrugged his shoulders, I considered, “Okay, I think as long as my water doesn’t break I’ll be okay. We are just going to stay calm and wait for Hert to get back. If the contractions get to be five minutes apart we will head to the hospital,” then trying my best to keep a level head I encouraged, “Let’s just talk about something while we are waiting.”

  Jackson’s voice was shaky as he said, “Like what?”

  Feeling he was making this harder than it needed to be, I shouted, “Does it matter?! You can make something up for all I care, just talk to me damn it!”

  Realizing I was not handling things well, I took a deep breath and tried again.

  Keeping my tone even, I said,
“I’m sorry. This is very painful and if you could just talk to me, it might take my mind off the excruciating pain I am in.”

  After staring at me like I was a crazy person, Jackson asked, “So how have you been?”

  If I hadn’t been in the most horrible pain of my life I would have murdered him right then and there.

  Gathering all the strength I had in me, I stated, “Could you please go upstairs in my room and get my suitcase. It’s right outside the closet.”

  He immediately ran upstairs. I leaned over resting my hands on the arm of the couch taking deep breaths.

  Bringing my bag down, Jackson asked, “Are they still seven minutes apart?”

  After staring at the clock for a while, I replied, “I think so but the pain is getting worse.”

  With a sudden burst of bravery, Jackson ordered, “That’s it. I’m taking you to the hospital. We’ll leave Hert a note or something.”

  I started crying wondering why after an entire month of Hert hovering over me, this had to happen the minute he left. Before I could move I heard the back door open.

  I hollered out, “Hert!”

  Running into the room, he stopped suddenly the moment he saw me.

  Jackson threw his hands up in the air announcing, “Finally! Damn your woman is stubborn!”

  Slowly walking over to me, Hert quietly asked, “Renni, can you make it to the car?” as I nodded, he put his arm around me holding me as we walked out the back door.

  Outside, he helped me into the car also telling Emerson to notify the hospital we were on our way. Emerson nodded and reassured that he and Jackson would be a few minutes behind us.

  On the way to the hospital I tried hard to remember to breathe and not think about how much pain I was in. Hert seemed to tense up every time I squeezed his hand. Neither one of us said a word. There was a wheelchair waiting for me at the hospital entrance.

  Hert kissed my forehead saying, “I’ll be right there,” leaving to park the car.

  I was quickly whisked inside and put in a room.

  The nurses hooked me up to monitors and took my temperature. Everything was happening so fast, I started to panic. One of the nurses urged me to calm down so my blood pressure wouldn’t go up, while she checked to see how far I was dilated. I really wanted to slap her.