Tainted Love

by Jaimie Roberts

  “I have to go now.” I grab my things, a huge smile on my face. Charlie still glowers at me. “I’m sure I’m leaving you in the more than capable hands of Charlie.” I should be scared by the throbbing vein in Charlie’s head, but the whole scene is way too comical to feel threatened. I’m sure he’ll forgive me by the time two weeks go by.

  “Yes, I’m sure he has more than capable hands.”

  A groan comes out of Charlie, but I’m already on the move. “Have a good holiday, Bri,” he bites through clenched teeth.

  I smile sweetly, open the door, and then wave at them. “Oh, I’m sure I will. Adios!”

  I walk out of the shop and wait for Chris to turn up. I’m giggling like a schoolgirl as I stand by the kerb, looking out for the telltale signs of his bike. After a beat, my laughter subsides, and all I’m left with is the burning question Charlie asked me whirling around in my head.

  “Why do you have to be so nice, Bri?”

  School was an absolute shitshow. My brother had managed to scrape together a few crackers for me to eat for breakfast this morning before I went in, but that was the only positive of the day. As soon as I arrived, the school’s most notorious bully saw the cigarette burn on my shirt and proceeded to point at it so everyone laughed at me. The only reason why I have this burn is because my mother was in a comatose state as she was attempting to do the washing and her cigarette fell out of her hand and onto my shirt. She was standing by the washing machine when she passed out and it happened. I mean, who gets so shit-faced that they fall asleep standing up? The only reason why she didn’t end up burning the house down was because my brother caught her. He tried to salvage my shirt, but the damage had already been done. Considering we don’t have the money to buy new clothes, my burned shirt will have to do. But now, everyone at school thinks I smoke, and this then caused the head teacher to call me in and start asking questions. I told her that it was an accident and that my mum is going to get me a new shirt as soon as she is able. Total bullshit, but it got the head teacher off my back. I think she realises we’re poor because I always get the same sympathy look from her that I do all my other teachers. I hate that look. I don’t need sympathy from anybody. Besides, my brother is trying his hardest to get a job so he can get us both the hell out of here. The trouble is, he has no education.

  During the week he was supposed to do his exams, our mother went on a bender, and he ended up having to look after her the whole time. He probably could have retaken them after explaining why he needed to reschedule, but that would mean admitting to our failed home. Unfortunately, both of us have too much pride for that—hence the reason he never rescheduled and why he never retook them. He’s been dancing around from one job to the other since, mostly cash in hand and temporary construction work—nothing he can put on a resume. When he has had jobs, life was temporarily great as we were able to eat, but pretty soon my mother would find the hiding spots where he’d put all his cash savings then drank it all. It pissed me off that all his hard work went down her selfish throat.

  When the bell for the end of school rang, I hightailed out of there to avoid being the butt of anyone else’s jokes. What makes everything worse is that normally the couple of crackers I was able to get this morning would have lasted me the whole day, but because the school decided to do a hot dog and burger day, my stomach has been rumbling since the smell began wafting through the hallways at eleven this morning.

  I’m one of the first people out of school, miserable and tired from lack of food. However, my mood takes a turn for the better when I spot my brother waiting outside for me.

  “Hey, precious,” he says, coming towards me for a hug. I blush at my nickname but smile brightly as this makes up for all the shit I endured today. Still in his embrace, I feel the bag he’s holding against my back, the aroma of vinegar hitting my nostrils, making my stomach rumble again. I pull back, eyes widening with hunger.

  “What’s that you got?”

  He waggles the bag in front of me. “Oh, you mean this?” he asks, teasing. “I spotted it on the wall of someone’s house. Fancy leaving a whole bag of fish and chips on the wall of your house unattended, huh?” He tuts, rolling his eyes, but I know what he really means is he stole it. How he did it, I won’t ask, but I know he didn’t use violence. He may steal, but my brother’s too sweet for outright thuggery.

  “Come to the park so we can eat?”

  Eagerly, I nod my head, and we make the short, five-minute walk to the park. The whole way there, all I can focus on is the bag of fish and chips teasing me with each stride. Once we find a bench, I’m almost combusting. It’s February, but the thought of food warms my stomach despite the chilly weather.

  “They’ll be cold by now,” he says, ripping the bag open.

  “I seriously don’t care,” I jibe back, making us both laugh.

  Once the first chip is uncovered, I waste no time gorging on it like it’s my last meal. For the next couple of minutes, we sit in total silence, the only sound being our moans of satisfaction and the faint sound of dogs barking somewhere in the park.

  After a beat, my brother stops eating and watches me consume the last morsels remaining, a sad expression on his face.

  “I need to fix this shit, Bri. This is no way to live. I can’t even afford to feed you.”

  I lick the grease and vinegar off my fingers before scrunching up the now empty bag and placing it the bin next to me. Once in, I scoot up to him, allowing his arm to wrap around my shoulder, sheltering me from the cold.

  “But you’ve just fed me.” And I feel so much better for it. I’m actually full, which in turn means I’m now fully satisfied and not miserable as sin anymore.

  “Yes, but what about later when you’re hungry again?”

  I squeeze his arm. “Don’t be silly. After what you’ve just given me, I’ll be good until tomorrow.”

  A grumble rumbles through his throat. “But it shouldn’t have to be this way.”

  I close my eyes, loving the warmth he provides. “We have each other, and that’s all that matters.”

  “Don’t leave me!” I snap up in bed, scared at first by my unfamiliar surroundings until there’s a slight dip and the sound of a splash against the boat, reminding me where we are.

  “Bri, are you okay? What’s the matter?” Chris asks, sitting up, squeezing my shoulder.

  “It’s fine. Just a bad dream.”

  He takes my hand, threading his fingers through mine. The only light in the luxury stateroom we’re in comes from the moon shining through the portholes.

  We got here after two this morning, and although we were all ecstatic by the huge yacht we’re on, we were so tired after traveling half the day, so we all called it quits and went to bed.

  “You know I will never leave you, right?” His eyes are darting, searching mine, guilt written in every twinkle.

  I nod my head, not wanting to go there. To go there would be reliving every moment of what used to be. To go there would tear my already crumbling heart to shreds.

  “I know you won’t. It was just a bad dream. Don’t worry about it.”

  Chris doesn’t ask about the dream, because to ask would mean suffering more guilt then he already does. Instead, he lies back down, pulling me towards him so that my head is resting on his chest.

  “We’re all just tired. You wait, baby. Tomorrow when we wake, we can explore this boat in the sunlight and have a swim. How about that?”

  I smile at Chris’s attempts at making me happy again. That always seems to be his number one goal in life. Sometimes I feel like an ungrateful bitch for wanting more in my life when I have a man who would stop at nothing to make me happy. I deeply love him, and I am grateful.

  But at what cost?

  Trying my hardest to ignore the dark thoughts in my head, I snuggle up closer to Chris, a soft smile coating my lips. “Sounds wonderful.”

  Booming laughter then a very loud splash is what wakes me up the next morning. Groaning, I pull mys
elf up from the comfortable bed, the sunlight shining through the windows burning my eyes. I rub them with my hands, trying to focus on my surroundings, my eyes snapping to the empty space next to me. I check my watch, my eyes widening when I see it’s already well after noon.

  “Morning, sleepyhead!” Chris shouts, practically crashing through the door, the excitement written all over his face making me smile. His broad chest is bare, my name on display accompanied by a few other tattoos he’s accumulated over the years. He’s wearing nothing but a pair of pale red swimming trunks that sit perfectly on his hips, displaying the most impressive V. He keeps in shape so much that it makes me feel guilty when I choose an elevator over a set of stairs. Chris doesn’t mind, though. He loves my curves. He says he never, ever wants to see me skinny, and if he does, he’ll smack my arse. A part of me wants to lose a few pounds just to make that happen.

  “It’s not morning, though, is it? How could you let me sleep in so late?”

  Chris sits down on the bed next to me, bouncing like an excitable child. The act makes one of his dark blonde locks fall above his right eye, but he swiftly moves it away from his face. “One, we’re still technically on UK time, so it is still morning to us—at least until tomorrow. Two, you looked so angelic in your sleep that I didn’t want to disturb you. And three, we’re on holiday, Bri. Let your hair down a little.”

  He grabs a hold of me, pulling me to him and tickling my waist. Instantly I’m wide awake and screaming like a banshee.

  “Okay, Okay!” I shout, trying to wriggle from his grip. “You’ve said your peace, now let me go.” He releases me, and I let out an undignified hmph.

  “Change into your swimming costume and join us up on the deck. We’ve got a spread of food and drinks going, and the lads are already taking a dip.”

  “So I hear,” still noting all the shouting outside. “Okay, give me a few to freshen up, and I’ll be right out.”

  “Don’t be too long,” he replies, his hand cupping my breast and caressing my peaked nipple, his eyes hooded. “Later, I’m going to fuck you in this bed until your pussy can’t take it anymore. And yes, I want you to scream for me. I want every fucker on this boat to know you’re mine.”

  Not that they don’t already know that. He says it often enough to them to last a lifetime. It’s practically been drummed into each one of them until that’s all they can think when they see me. I may as well have Chris’s Property written across my forehead.

  “I’ll look forward to that,” I reply, my voice but a whisper.

  Chris growls at my seduction but lets me go so that I can get ready.

  I quickly use the loo, brushing my teeth and putting my hair up into a tight bun so I’m ready for my dip in the sea. Chris had packed me a one piece, but without him looking I grabbed my sexy black and gold bikini and packed that instead. He’ll flip once he sees me in it, but if I’m honest enough, that’s the reaction I’m hoping for. Sex between us is always explosive but even more so when he’s angry. Who can blame a girl armed with this fact when she takes a flame to his stick of dynamite?

  Diving into my suitcase, I dig out said bikini, which I’d conveniently hid inside one of the pockets, and lay it out on the bed. I chose it because it’s unique. The black part covering my boobs is a push-up, accentuating my already bulging bust. Unfortunately for me, I always have to buy swimwear that’s two sizes too big for me to allow my breasts the room. Definitely a big breast woman problem, that and fitted shirts. I hardly ever wear them because my boobs push out against them so much that it looks like the button’s about to pop at any second.

  I busy myself getting into the bikini then check myself out in the mirror. Shit, it looks even better than I thought. I have a distinct V from my chest to my breasts, accentuating my cleavage. Underneath my breasts are criss-cross straps of gold wrapping around my torso, making my waistline stand out. The black bottoms only just about cover my vajayjay, the two gold straps holding them in place. I feel sexy as I twirl in front of the mirror, my hands caressing my curves as I go.

  Shouts and laughter are what snap me out of it. I shouldn’t be stuck in here a moment longer when I know all the fun is outside.

  I open the door, taking a few steps up to the vast kitchen and living area. The kitchen in the daylight is absolutely luxurious. The black granite countertops have speckles of what looks like diamonds inside, making them twinkle in the light. Nothing but stainless-steel appliances adorn the kitchen, and despite this being a boat, they still managed to squeeze in a wine fridge which was fully stocked when we got here. All the lads went apeshit when they saw that last night.

  I venture into the living area, feeling the plush cream carpet beneath my feet. A huge, eight-seat sofa wraps around one side of the boat, and on the other is a panel where there’s a hidden seventy-inch screen TV. When Larry found the hidden button for that underneath the panel and pressed it, he almost shit himself.

  Continuing towards where the noise is getting louder, I step out onto the wooden deck of the patio and up the steps to the front of the boat where all the lads are. I say lads as I’m the only lady. For some reason, no girls were allowed on this trip apart from me. I’m unsure why that’s the case.

  As I reach the top step, Larry is the first to notice me, his mouth parting as I emerge. He has his shades on, so I can’t read his expression, but his open mouth certainly says a lot.

  “Holy fucking shit, it’s Princess Leia! Fuck me!”

  I let out a snicker, but silence fills the air as all eyes land upon me, their expressions the same as Larry’s. Well, all but one. As I had hoped, Chris stands by the table where the food is spread out, bottle of beer in hand, his nostrils flaring to display previously unseen levels of anger.

  “Good morning, boys,” I say, walking slowly towards the table and picking up a stick of cheese and pineapple. Chris watches me, his face stern as I take the stick and seductively place it in my mouth.

  “What the fuck do you think you’re wearing?” he growls, loud enough for everyone to hear.

  I twirl around, pointing at my bikini then rubbing my hands over my curves. “You mean this old thing? I found it in the back of the wardrobe. Thought it might fit, and hey, it does. What do you think, boys?”

  Larry and Kane are about to respond, but Chris beats them to it. “If one of you dares to answer that question, so help me God, I will throw you into the ocean where your body will never be found again.”

  “Sea,” I say, grabbing another stick of cheese.

  “What?” Chris snaps back.

  “Technically we’re on the sea as seas are much smaller than oceans…”

  “I don’t give a flying fuck if we’re in Timbuk-fucking-tu. Go get changed.”

  I jut my hip out, chin held high, standing my ground. “No.”

  Everyone is deathly silent as they watch the scene unfold in front of them. Gone is the fun and laughter of just a couple minutes ago.

  Chris closes the distance between us, his nostrils flaring again once his eyes meet my bulging cleavage. “Don’t make me tell you again.”

  “Or what?” I ask, deliberately planting my hands upon my hips, the silence around us deathly now. I haven’t even managed to process the beauty that surrounds me on this boat, I’m so consumed with our stand-off.

  Chris hesitates a moment, his teeth gritting, his eyes hooded with anger and lust, fire and rage… all the ingredients needed for a combustion that will burn from the inside out. Our eyes are locked, a silent duel playing between us. Pretty soon, though, I know Chris will snap, making a grab for me, so to call his bluff, I about turn and run as fast as my legs can carry me towards the edge of the boat and launch as high as I can, whooping as I dive.

  The cold water hits me, shocking my senses as I plunge into the vast sea. When I surface, I open my eyes on a gasp, my arms and legs flailing through the water. “Shit, it’s cold,” I giggle as others start to join me. One by one, they all jump in. All but one brooding male currently still gl
aring at me from the boat.

  “Oh, come on, grumpy! Get in. The water’s lovely.” And it is now that I’m getting used to it. I twirl around, noting that we’re approximately a thousand meters or more away from the shore. The sun is high in the sky, and of course, being that it’s well into June, the weather here is hotter than hades. Well, it was until I jumped into this beautiful, cool water.

  A huge splash jolts me out of my reverie. I turn quickly, my arm being yanked towards this tyrant of a man, his arm snaking a possessive claim around my waist. Our eyes catch, our lips only a breath apart. He’s still angry, but that anger is being pulsated into the one area that’s pressed against my crotch.

  “Barely here a day and already I want to spank that naughty fucking arse of yours,” he growls, thrusting his erection against my stomach.

  I’m about to retort that I am my own woman when cold water is thrown over us. “Hey, if we can’t get any action, neither can you.”

  “Fuck off,” Chris snaps back to Andrew, but he smiles before placing his lips upon mine, our tongues dancing.

  “Fuck’s sake, I’m going to have a serious case of blue balls by the time I get back home.”

  “Don’t worry, Andrew,” Kane shouts back. “I’m sure we’ll find you some nice Spanish pussy to sink your dick into.”

  I groan, pulling away from our kiss. “You are so disgusting,” I retort.

  Kane pulls his head back, dipping it into the water. “Ah, you love it. All chicks love it.”

  I snort a laugh. “Okay, Kane. Whatever you say.”

  I note Michael being quiet, but I don’t say anything because sometimes he just likes to brood. Maybe today is one of them. He swims towards the ladder, hoisting himself up, but nobody pays him any mind.

  Wrapping my arms around Chris and my legs around his waist, I smile. “So what’s the POA?”

  Chris frowns. “POA?”

  I giggle back. “Plan of action, silly.”

  “Oh,” he replies, twirling us around in the water. I dip my head back a moment, relishing the cool water on my hot head. “We have enough supplies, so we’ll spend the next couple of days out at sea, partying and shit. Tuesday we’ll dock in Gibraltar and have a look round there, go to the shops and stuff, refuel the boat, shit like that. We’ll play everything by ear, but we also need to do some sightseeing. We should hire a car a couple of days and see what Spain has to offer. All I know is that a week from Tuesday at the latest, we’ll need to be heading back. I don’t know how long it will take us to get this thing home, so we need to play it safe.”