No Second Chances

by Marissa Farrar

  We reached her house, and I was relieved to see her driveway empty. Thank God, her dad wasn’t home. I wasn’t keen on the idea of having to explain to him why his daughter wasn’t able to stand up straight.

  We made it to the front door, and Gabi fumbled for her keys. It had just started to get dark, the street lights flickering on one by one. We were almost through the door when car headlights swung up the drive.

  Shit.

  “Uh-oh,” said Gabi at my side, though I could hear the drunken giggle in her tone. “My dad’s home.”

  The headlights blinded us for a second, making us both squint until the engine fell quiet and the beams flicked off. I debated whether or not I would get away with shoving Gabi through the front door and making a run for it, but I didn’t think that would go down well with either her or her father.

  The car door opened and slammed shut, and then he was walking up the driveway toward us.

  “Gabi, you’re home,” he said.

  She lifted a hand and waved. “Hi, Dad.”

  “Hi, Mr. Weston,” I said, wishing desperately that I didn’t have to be forced into having a conversation with the guy. I’d never been good with girlfriends’ parents—not that I’d met many. Hell, I hadn’t been good with parents of my own, so I had no reason to expect anyone else’s to like me. I was also painfully aware of the fact Gabi had been drinking. Even though she seemed to have sobered up a little during the walk home, he was bound to spot it.

  He did, sniffing as he got closer, his forehead creasing into a frown. “Gabi? Do I smell alcohol?”

  She giggled. “Are you like a bloodhound now, sniffing out the booze?”

  “Gabi,” he said, a warning tone in his voice.

  “I should probably get going,” I said, giving Gabi’s hand a squeeze and stepping away.

  “No, you don’t,” Mr. Weston said. “Stay right where you are.”

  Double shit.

  “I’m serious, Gabi, if you’ve been drinking, you need to tell me.”

  “Why?” she replied. “You never tell me when you’ve been drinking.”

  I glanced at her in surprise. I’d never taken her for someone who would talk back to her father, especially considering she’d just been busted for under-aged drinking. Perhaps it was the booze talking.

  He exhaled a frustrated sigh. “You have, haven’t you?”

  “I was having fun for once,” she shot back. “Maybe I learned from my dad, huh. It’s not like you ever set a good example.”

  Happy, giggly Gabi had suddenly morphed into angry, bitter Gabi. I’d never seen this side of her, and the anger appeared to be directed at her father. His cheeks were flushed bright red, his mouth a hard line.

  He turned to me. “I think you should go home now.”

  I was worried to leave her here. Things weren’t right between her and her dad, but I wasn’t sure what it was about.

  “Are you okay, Gabs?” I asked her softly.

  “Don’t speak to her,” he snapped. “I asked you to leave, young man. You’re standing on my property, and you’ve just gotten my under-aged daughter drunk. I suggest you make yourself scarce before I decide to take things further.”

  “Gabi?” I said again, not knowing what to do. I didn’t want to leave her like this, but I had a feeling her dad would physically force me to leave if he wanted to. I didn’t want us to end up tussling on the front lawn.

  “It’s fine, Cole. I’m going to bed.”

  She had tears in her eyes, and I wanted to pull her into a hug or kiss her goodbye, but I didn’t dare, not with her father watching.

  What the hell was going on with them? I remember the night when I’d picked her up walking the streets in the rain. I knew her home life wasn’t perfect—whose was?—but for the first time I wondered if there was more going on than she’d told me about.

  “Get in the house, young lady,” he ordered.

  “Fine, I’m going,” she snapped back. Then she looked over to me. “I meant what I said, Cole.”

  I gave her a smile. “Me, too.”

  And then I turned and walked away, hoping beyond hope her dad didn’t lay a finger on her.

  If he did, I wasn’t sure I’d be responsible for my actions.

  Chapter Twenty-four

  Gabi - Eleven Years Earlier

  I woke the next morning with a headache and a niggling certainty something had happened last night. Flipping back in my memories, I remembered going to Cole’s band practice, drinking something, and then staggering home. I cringed slightly at my drunken declaration of love, but then also remembered his reply back to me. Despite my hangover, I hugged myself with happiness. When he’d approached me all those weeks ago, when I’d been reading in the park, I never would have imagined Cole and I would have ended up in this position.

  So things didn’t go badly with Cole last night, even if I may have embarrassed myself slightly, so why did I have this sickening sensation in my stomach—I didn’t think it was just down to the effects of last night’s alcohol.

  A knock came at my door, and my dad walked in holding a glass of water. The sight of him caused a light bulb to ping on in my head, and I barely restrained myself from groaning. Dad had caught me coming home with Cole last night, and had made Cole leave. I was more concerned about what Cole thought of me now, than the fight with my dad.

  “Gabriella,” he said, as he sat on the edge of my bed. “You and I need to have a talk.”

  I groaned and rolled over. “Just leave it, Dad. All kids my age have the occasional drink. It’s not a big deal. And if it makes you feel any better, I feel like crap this morning, so I won’t be drinking for at least another three years, okay?”

  “I’m glad to hear it, but that isn’t what I wanted to talk to you about.”

  I sat up and looked at him. “It isn’t?”

  “No. I’ve been asking around about that boy you’ve been hanging out with.”

  “His name is Cole.”

  “I want you to stay away from him, Gabriella. I deal with kids like him every day, and they’re bad news.”

  Anger burst through me. “Yeah, you’d know all about bad news, wouldn’t you, Dad? Because you’re such a fine, upstanding citizen yourself.”

  “This isn’t about me. I’m only doing what’s best for you, and I don’t want you seeing him again.”

  “You don’t own me! I’ll be eighteen in a few months, and then I can do anything I like.”

  “But you’re not eighteen yet, young lady, and while you’re under my roof, you go by my rules.”

  I wanted to say that I’d been following his rules on life just last night, but I managed to keep my mouth shut. I didn’t want to fight with him, but there was no way I was going to let him stop me seeing Cole. Even a single day without Cole felt like torture. I couldn’t bring myself to imagine longer.

  “Listen to me, Dad,” I said, trying to stay calm. “If you want to push me away, you’re going about it in the exact right way. I’m going to be eighteen in a few weeks, and Cole will be eighteen this month. Don’t make me choose between the two of you, because right now I’d choose him.”

  “He’ll hurt you, Gabi. Boys like him always hurt girls like you.”

  “So be there for me for the fall-out if you want to be a good dad.”

  He stared at me as though finally seeing me in a new light, and I thought I might have convinced him, but then he shook his head. “What about that band he plays with. They’re on our radar, Gabi. They’ve already been noticed and they’re bad news. If I can’t get you to agree to stay away from Cole, will you at least stay away from the band?”

  I’d enjoyed myself last night, something I’d been surprised about, but not having to spend time with them again didn’t sound like a bad thing in my book. Something about them just didn’t sit right with me. In particular, Ryan set my teeth on edge. I didn’t know exactly what it was about him, but I thought my dad might be right about the band.

  “Okay,” I agreed.
“I’ll stay away from band practice.”

  “And it might be an idea for you to suggest to Cole that he should do the same thing.”

  I nodded, knowing I’d never suggest such a thing to him. I didn’t want him to think I was the type of girl who tried to change a guy once she’d gotten her claws into him.

  The truth was, I’d be happy if Cole gave up the band. I didn’t like the way they treated him. Sure, they were a couple of years older, but I almost felt like they were laughing at him behind his back. I didn’t want to say anything to Cole—not only did I feel like it wasn’t my place, but I also didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Plus, he really loved playing with the band, even if they weren’t particularly good—and I didn’t want him to feel awkward about going just because I’d opened my big mouth.

  The other thing that bothered me was how they treated me when I was there. I was basically ignored, with the exception of creepy Ryan and the way his eyes traveled up and down my body. I could just tell he was thinking about what I looked like without any clothes on. Perhaps I should say something to Cole, but I didn’t want to put him in that position. These guys weren’t just his friends, they were his band members, and if he fell out with them, he would no longer have a spot in the band.

  My dad reached out for a hug, his arms enveloping me, and I squeezed him back. As he pulled away from me, he noticed something. He picked up Cole’s hoodie from my pillow, a number of lines appearing between his brows. He held it up, allowing the material to open out, showing from the size that the sweater was obviously not belonging to a teenage girl.

  “I assume this is his?”

  Blood heated my face, and I snatched the sweatshirt back. “Yes, Cole loaned it to me.”

  “Do I need to be worried about how close the two of you are getting—physically, I mean?”

  “Nothing’s happened between us, Dad,” I muttered, mortified. Dad and I didn’t have these kinds of conversations. We talked about books, and the sports teams he followed, and what needed to be picked up from the grocery store. We certainly didn’t talk about the opposite sex.

  He clutched his hands in his lap and glanced down at them. “So, Gabi, I know I’ve probably left this a little late, but if you are starting to get interested in boys, there’s a conversation we should be having.”

  Dear Lord, please let the ground open up and swallow me …

  “Dad, seriously, you don’t need to be doing this.”

  “I know I haven’t been much of a replacement for your mother …”

  “You’ve been great, Dad,” I said, not wanting to fill in the hole of ‘apart from the drinking.’

  “Anyway,” he continued, “There are things you need to know about as you’re growing into a young woman.”

  “Dad!” I practically yelled. “Stop, now, please. You don’t need to be having this conversation with me. I learned it all for myself several years ago.”

  For a moment, his mortification appeared to equal my own, and it dawned on me that he thought I’d learned the practical way.

  I raised both hands. “No, Dad, not like that. I mean, it’s the modern day. Girls talk.” I widened my eyes, hoping to get the point across without having to say any more.

  “Oh, right.” It was his turn to flush red, and he got back to his feet. “As long as you’re … safe … you know.”

  “I know, but honestly, that hasn’t happened.” I stopped myself adding, ‘yet.’

  He flicked imaginary dust off the front of his pants and headed to the door. “Well, I’m glad we had this chat.”

  “Yeah, me too, Dad,” I replied, doing my best not to roll my eyes. He really was completely clueless at times.

  He shut the door behind him and I dropped back onto my pillow, my hands covering my face. That was the most embarrassing conversation, ever. At least my dad hadn’t banned me from seeing Cole, though I did feel like every time he saw us, he would be wondering if we’d slept together yet. Ugh.

  I picked up Cole’s hoodie and placed it over my face, inhaling the scent of him. What would be the future for Cole and me? Did we even have one? I’d be leaving town to go to college in the not so far future. What would happen to us then?

  As well as my potential separation from Cole when I went off to college, I was also worried about how my dad would cope. Even though he kept telling me how he was the grown man, and I was the child, that didn’t stop me worrying about him. He was excellent at hiding his drinking around the house, doing his best to keep up appearances on my behalf, but what would happen when I wasn’t around anymore? Would he still make an effort to appear normal on the days when he wasn’t at work, or would he just give up even trying? I’d told myself that it was ages away, and I didn’t need to be concerned about it yet, but the weeks became months, and all of a sudden it felt like leaving was all too soon.

  Was leaving for college even what I wanted anymore?

  Chapter Twenty-five

  Gabi - Eleven Years Earlier

  Over the next few weeks, Cole and I became inseparable. We were now officially a couple in the eyes of pretty much everyone, and we’d regularly be seen walking down the school hall, with his arm over my shoulders, and mine around his waist. We’d part for our various classes and then meet back up for breaks or lunch. I couldn’t explain it, but being with Cole had somehow elevated my position at school. More people acknowledged my existence now, though I wasn’t sure I wanted them to. When I was with him, I felt like I was walking taller, or perhaps it was just that I was walking a foot in the air.

  Taylor still wasn’t talking to me, and Jasmine appeared to have taken her side about the whole thing, which seemed crazy to me, though Jas still spoke to me when Taylor wasn’t around. People on the outside probably thought I was wrong for picking a guy over a friend, but as far as I could tell, I didn’t think Taylor was being much of a friend in the first place for getting upset over a misunderstanding. Now I’d gotten to know Cole better, I could see that someone like Taylor would never be for him. He couldn’t stand any kind of fakeness—girls who wore too much makeup, or who liked to bitch behind each other’s backs. Cole felt bad he’d come between me and Taylor, but I told him things would work themselves out eventually.

  My dad had managed to keep things civil between him and Cole. He’d spotted Cole picking me up and dropping me off a couple of times, but so far their interaction had consisted of Cole waving and shouting, ‘Hello, Mr. Weston,’ and my dad waving back, a tight smile on his lips. I was relieved my dad hadn’t attempted to have some kind of ‘if you hurt my daughter, I’ll kill you’ conversation with Cole, though it wouldn’t have surprised me if it was somewhere in our near future.

  Cole was turning eighteen in a few days, and I still didn’t have a gift for him. There was one thing I could think of, but the idea made my stomach roil with both nerves and excitement. Due to my dad’s erratic working hours, we got to spend plenty of time alone in the house, and the kissing—which we would happily do for hours on end—had progressed to second base, and quickly on to third. I didn’t kid myself for a second that Cole was as innocent as me. I knew of ex-girlfriends, and they weren’t exactly of the reserved kind, which filled me with an intense jealousy for his past. He was all I wanted, and I didn’t want other girls to have had a part of him that I hadn’t, to have done things with him that I hadn’t. But that wasn’t my only reason.

  I wanted him, too.

  ***

  On the day of Cole’s birthday, I had the house to myself. I hadn’t told my dad about the importance of the date, and so he’d gone out for the day. If I’d mentioned it was Cole’s eighteenth, I was sure he’d have made an excuse to stay home.

  Excited and nervous, I’d spent the morning baking Cole a cake, and then I dressed in the sexiest underwear I owned—a black lacy bra which pushed up my breasts, and a tiny thong, that was definitely built for speed rather than comfort. Feeling a bit silly, I wrapped a length of red ribbon around my tummy and tied it into a bow, and then sli
pped my silky robe over the top. I hoped he wasn’t going to laugh at me.

  The doorbell rang and I yelled down the stairs, “It’s open.”

  Sudden fear it wasn’t him and I was about to be spotted by a delivery driver filled me, but then I heard Cole’s voice, “Gabi?”

  “Up here,” I called back. I heard his feet on the stairs. “I’m in my room.”

  The bedroom door pushed open and I braced myself. As soon as he appeared in the doorway, I allowed the robe to slip from my shoulders and drift to the floor. Cole’s eyes opened in surprise.

  “Happy birthday!” I said, trying to appear seductive, rather than stupid and completely out of my comfort zone.

  His mouth dropped open and then a smile spread across his face. “Holy shit, Gabi. Is this what I think it is?”

  “If you’re thinking that my birthday present to you is me, then yes, it’s exactly what you think it is.”

  He bit his lower lip and took a slow step forward.

  “Gabi,” he said, his blue eyes suddenly appearing a shade darker, “if you’re hoping I’m going to ask you if you’re sure about this, and then we end up just cuddling on the couch, I’ve got to tell you you’re going about this the wrong damn way.”

  I repressed a smile and shook my head. “I promise that’s not what I’m doing. I’m your present.” I gave a shimmy, making the ribbon rustle. “Happy birthday.”

  He growled. “And you know I’m going to unwrap you like a candy bar?”

  I giggled. “That was exactly what I was hoping you’d do.”

  He took another step closer, so we were only a foot apart now. He reached out and snagged the end of the ribbon bow I’d tied around my stomach and slowly pulled it apart. His breathing had grown deeper and my own breath was shallow in my chest, my heartbeat racing.