Redemption [Slick Rock 18] (Siren Publishing Menage Everlasting)

by Becca Van

  Enya nodded but Axel wasn’t so sure she was going to heed their advice. There was nothing they could do if she chose to ignore them, but he hoped she didn’t.

  * * * *

  Enya didn’t know why she was being so argumentative, because she knew that she should take time off to recover. However, she could be stubborn to her own detriment and she hated being told what to do. Whether that was because she and her mom had been held captive for nearly two years, she had no idea, but whenever someone gave her an order, she often found herself doing the total opposite and she got her back up.

  Being told what to do with no choice for nearly two years had almost broken her and she’d vowed to never let anyone have that much hold over her ever again. Sometimes she was her own worst enemy but she couldn’t seem to help her self-protection.

  She had a feeling a psychiatrist would have a field day with her, but again, she never wanted to see another counselor ever. After she’d been rescued, she’d seen a professional and spoken about the horrors she and her mother had endured, but it hadn’t helped one little bit. Enya wasn’t sure if that was because she’d been in shock or if it was because she’d closed herself off from all emotions. Back then, it had been the only way she’d been able to deal with her grief and the terror she’d endured for so long.

  Having to face the world without her mother had left her feeling so lost and alone. Closing herself off had been easier than having to deal with reality, and while she wanted to start living again, she wasn’t sure how to go about it.

  She cringed every time she thought about what she’d done with Cam in the shower that morning, but she couldn’t go back and change the past. Enya had let lust rule her and hadn’t thought about having to face him, Phoenix or Axel in the light of day.

  Cooking, baking was her passion and her sanity and now that she didn’t have that—even if it wasn’t for very long—she wasn’t sure what to do.

  Maybe she could talk Delta and Violet into letting her come into the diner to do all the paperwork. At least she would feel as if she was pulling her weight in some trivial way.

  She glanced up when she realized how quiet it was and then quickly looked away when she noticed that Axel, Cam, and Phoenix were all watching her intently. She’d been so lost in thought she hadn’t even heard Cam come back into the room.

  Enya finished the last of her coffee and shoved to her feet. As she walked across to the kitchen, she kept her gaze averted. “I want to thank you all for taking care of me last night. I really appreciate it.” She kept her back to the men as she rinsed her cup and then put it into the dishwasher. When she turned around, she gasped. All three of them were standing in the kitchen blocking her way to the exit. She backed up a step and bumped against the counter.

  “That sounded like you were trying to say good-bye.” Cam scowled at her as he crossed his arms over his chest.

  “I was. I need to get back to my place and clean up. I have to contact the real estate agent so the landlord can fix my bedroom window.”

  “Cree already said they contacted the estate agent,” Phoenix said. “The window should have been fixed first thing this morning.”

  “When did he say that?” Enya frowned.

  “When I was seeing him out,” Cam explained.

  Enya sighed with relief. Sometimes, when she got lost in thought, or had a flashback, she missed hearing people talking and ended up looking like an idiot. However, this time she was in the clear. Thankfully.

  “You can’t leave, honey,” Axel said. “You’re going to need help since your dominant hand is out of action.”

  “I’m sure I’ll get by,” Enya hedged.

  “Why are you pulling away from us, sweetheart?” Cam asked gently. “I thought after this morning you would want to hang around. Aren’t you attracted to us anymore? Did I do something to scare you?”

  Enya’s cheeks heated and she lowered her head, trying to use her hair to cover her flushed skin. She couldn’t believe Cam had brought up what she’d done in the shower. Her humiliation was complete. Tears burned her eyes but she blinked rapidly to dispel them. She wasn’t about to cry and look weaker than she already did in front of these three successful careermen.

  The best thing she could do was leave, even if she had to walk for hours to get back to her own place.

  Chapter Nine

  Phoenix was normally a patient man but right now he couldn’t hold back any longer. He had a feeling if they let Enya walk, their chances of courting her would be over for good.

  He decided to take matters in hand because there was no way in hell he was going to lose her.

  He took the few steps closer to her and cupped her cheeks between his hands and brought her gaze up toward his. His heart flipped in his chest and the breath stuttered in his lungs when he saw moisture glistening in her amazing blue eyes.

  “What’s wrong, baby? Why are you crying?”

  “I’m not crying,” she wailed.

  He lowered her hands from her face, gripped her hips and tugged her into his arms. Never had any other woman felt so right to him. Enya was the most amazingly, unconsciously sexy woman he’d ever been lucky enough to lay eyes on. He was going to do everything within his power to keep her right where she was.

  “Okay, you’re not crying, but tell me why you’re so upset,” he commanded firmly.

  “Cam told you and A-Axel.”

  “And?” Phoenix nudged her chin up until she was looking into his eyes again. This time there was no way she could deny she was crying since tears were trickling down her cheeks.

  “And?” she asked stridently. “What do you mean and? Don’t you know how humiliating that is? Y’all were talking about me behind my back. Did you have a good laugh?”

  “Fuck no!” Cam shouted.

  Enya flinched and would have pulled away if Phoenix hadn’t been holding her.

  Cam drew in a deep audible breath. “I, we, would never, ever, laugh about you or talk about you behind your back.”

  Enya wriggled out of his hold and took a step toward Cam. She poked him in the middle of the chest. “That’s a big fat lie. You told them what we…what I…”

  “Sweetheart, it wasn’t like you’re thinking.” Cam cupped a cheek and swiped her cheek with his thumb. “Yes, we talked, but it wasn’t derogatory, and I sure as fuck wasn’t bragging as if you were just another notch on my belt.”

  “We would never do or say anything to purposely hurt you, baby,” Phoenix reiterated. He would continue telling her the same thing over and over if it meant she would one day finally believe him.

  “I’m scared,” Enya whispered.

  “Of what?” he asked as he caressed up and down her back.

  “Of getting hurt again.”

  “Honey, we’re scared, too,” Axel said as he moved closer to her other side. “However, if we don’t take the risk of getting our hearts broken, we might never have met you. None of us know if this thing between us is going to work out. None of us know what tomorrow will bring. We might end up dying in a car wreck tomorrow, or a week from now, but we aren’t going to let fear keep us from trying to live.”

  “Axel’s right, baby. Are you brave enough to reach out and grab hold of what’s right in front of you, of what we’re offering you, or are you going to let fear of the unknown rule your life? Do you want to remain alone and lonely for the rest of your days?”

  “No,” Enya rasped out.

  “Will you please give us a chance?” Cam asked.

  Even Phoenix heard the vulnerability in his friend’s voice. When he glanced over at him, he noticed that his jaw was clenched tight. Axel shifted restlessly from foot to foot beside him, and he didn’t realize he was holding his breath until his lungs started to burn.

  “I want to,” she answered hesitantly.

  “But?” Phoenix asked.

  “But what if I open myself up and you don’t like what you see, what you find? What if I’m not who you think I am? What if I’m not what you nee
d after all?”

  “Baby, I can tell you now that you’re everything we’ve been looking for and didn’t know we were missing. We’ve been in this town for just on a year and we’ve been watching all the men and women in the polyandrous relationships.” Phoenix paused to take a breath and get his thoughts in order. “We aren’t young bucks just starting out.”

  “We’ve been in our share of relationships,” Axel said.

  “If you can call them that.” Cam frowned and then shook his head. “Sweetheart, we’re mature men and have experienced a lot of life. Yes, we’ve hooked up with women, together as well as alone, but none of those women ever got to us the way you do.”

  “We were medics in the army, baby. We’ve seen a lot of shit, some good and some horrific. We know what we’re looking for and you’re it.”

  “You served for our country?” Enya asked.

  Of all the things they’d just said, Phoenix wasn’t that surprised by her question. Enya had a heart as big as Texas and always seemed to put others before herself. He hoped, if given the chance, that he and his friends would be able to change that. They wanted her to put herself first for a change. She needed to take better care of herself, but if she didn’t, he, Cam and Axel would do it for her. Thank fuck the hospital board had decided to advertise for more doctors. When the new medical staff came along, he and his friends hopefully wouldn’t have to work such long hours. If it wasn’t for William and his brother, they wouldn’t have all been able to be here with Enya right now.

  “We did,” Axel answered her question.

  “Thank you, all of you. People like you make our world a better place to live in.”

  “We weren’t the ones fighting the war, sweetheart,” Cam stated.

  “No, but you were on hand to fix any of our injured soldiers. That’s just as, if not more important than fighting. I have no doubt that because of you three a lot of our servicemen and women got to go home when you all saved their lives.”

  Phoenix nodded because what Enya said was true, but he and his friends didn’t like being praised for doing their jobs.

  “See, right there,” Axel said as he clasped Enya’s uninjured hand.

  “What?” She blinked with confusion.

  “You thanking us when you didn’t even know us while we were serving. That just confirms how big your heart is, honey. You think we don’t see, don’t know how caring you are. You might try to hide it, but we see it. We see you, Enya. We see right into your heart and soul.”

  * * * *

  Enya fell a little in love with Axel, Cam, and Phoenix right then and there. She knew that they were right about taking a chance and although she still had reservations about wearing her heart out on her sleeve, she couldn’t, didn’t want to hold back anymore. Yes, she had some wonderful new friends with Delta, Violet, Katie, Kiara, Jaylynn and even the younger Cindy, but she wanted more.

  She’d be an absolute fool to walk away from these wonderful, caring men without giving them and herself a chance. For all she knew, they could end up being the best thing that ever happened to her. She didn’t want to have regrets as she looked back over her life, when she was older. And she had a feeling that if she walked away and didn’t take what was being offered, she would have many, many regrets.

  She was just about to agree to trying to have a relationship with them, but when she remembered she’d never had sex with anyone, she hesitated and blushed.

  “What’s wrong, sweetheart? Why are you blushing?” Cam asked.

  Right now she wished he and his friends weren’t so observant but she supposed if that was the case, they wouldn’t be the great doctors they were.

  “I’ve…” She paused to lick her lips. “I’ve never been in a relationship before.”

  “You don’t need to worry about that, baby,” Phoenix said. “No two relationships are ever the same because people aren’t the same either. We’ll work things out as we go along.”

  “That’s not what I mean,” she murmured.

  Axel frowned.

  Cam stroked a hand over her head and hair. “You don’t need to explain anything to us, sweetheart. We don’t want you uncomfortable.”

  “Yes, I do.” Enya sucked in a ragged breath. “What I’m trying to say is…I’ve never had sex before.”

  “You’re a virgin?” Phoenix asked.

  Enya felt her face get redder if that was at all possible but she couldn’t lie to them, so she nodded.

  “I knew you were special,” Axel said in a voice deep with emotion.

  She frowned. “I’m not special.”

  “You are to us, sweetheart,” Cam said emphatically.

  She shook her head. “Would you still think I was special if I’d had sex with a hundred men?”

  “Yes!” they answered simultaneously.

  Enya laughed. She couldn’t help it. They looked so damn serious and certain. She was more than a little intimidated. She wasn’t sure she’d be able to say the same if she found out they’d all had sex with a hundred women. Jealousy pierced her heart and that was the moment she knew she was falling for these three men fast and hard. Just thinking about them touching, kissing, loving other women had the ugly green monster raising its head.

  She pushed her envy aside since she didn’t have the right to judge them over things that had happened in the past when she hadn’t even known them.

  As she pondered over what they’d said, excitement and lust fluttered in her belly. That wasn’t the only part of her body to respond. Whenever they were around and even when they weren’t her pussy and nipples reacted to them. Just thinking about them had desire racing through her veins, through her blood and centering in her breasts and pussy.

  Am I really going to do this? Am I really considering having a relationship with them?

  Her inner voice answered the questions instantly. Yes, do it!

  Enya took a deep fortifying breath and before she could talk herself out of her decision, she nodded her head.

  “What are you saying yes to, sweetheart?” Cam asked in a deep raspy tone.

  “To all of it. I want to try—”

  She didn’t get to finish her statement because Phoenix swooped in and started kissing her. He wasn’t aggressive, but almost tentative as he brushed his lips over hers, however, that quickly changed when she parted her lips on a gasp.

  His arm tightened around her waist and pulled her so close, there wasn’t any space between them. She moaned when his tongue licked into her mouth and couldn’t help shifting from side to side when she felt the thick, hard ridge of his cock pressing into her belly.

  Hot desire raced through her blood, centering low in her belly, creating a pool of liquid heat. The ache in her pussy, womb, and clit intensified until she thought she’d go crazy with unrequited lust. Moisture coated her folds and her clit seemed to have taken up the rhythm of her heartbeat. Her breasts grew heavy and swollen and her areolae ruched as her nipples tightened to hard points.

  She groaned as she tangled and twirled her tongue with and around Phoenix’s, and she gasped when he grabbed her ass and lifted her feet from the floor so that she was higher up his chest.

  Enya wrapped her arms around his neck and legs around his waist. He squeezed her ass cheeks in his big, manly hands and when he began to rub her pussy against his hard cock, she sobbed with pleasure.

  She was one big aching mass of need and the fire burning inside her was so hot and high, she was scared she was going to burn alive, but she quickly pushed her fear aside.

  This wasn’t the time to let fear rule her. She’d done that for way too long already. This was the moment that would hopefully set her on a different path. Fear no longer had a place in her life. It was time to take control and move forward.

  Enya gulped in lungfuls of air when Phoenix broke the kiss, and she opened her eyes to meet his gaze.

  “You’re amazing, baby,” he panted out between shallow breaths.

  She smiled and shook her head at the same time
. Enya was glad that he and his friends thought she was special, but she didn’t have to believe it. She was just a normal woman trying to make her way in the world like everyone else.

  “Tighten your arms and legs around me, Enya,” Phoenix said just before he spun on his heels and headed toward the kitchen entrance.

  She glanced over his shoulder at Cam and Axel and shivered when she saw the heated hunger in their gazes.

  When Phoenix entered the bedroom, he slid her down his body until her feet touched the floor and cupped her cheeks between his hands. “We’ll go slow with you, baby, but if at any time you feel overwhelmed or don’t like something we do, all you have to do is say stop. Okay?”

  She nodded and licked her lips nervously. This was it. This was a big moment for her.

  Enya was about to have sex for the first time and while she was trepidatious, she was also eager. She just hoped that she didn’t have a flashback of what her mother had to endure at the hands of that monster.

  “Look at me, baby,” Phoenix ordered.

  She hadn’t even noticed she’d zoned out for a second until he’d spoken. Nor that she was frowning until he’d brought her back to the present.

  “Where did you go, honey?” Axel asked as he moved in behind her.

  She glanced over at Cam to see a worried expression on his face, too.

  Enya couldn’t believe how observant they all were and while she didn’t really want to voice her fears, she couldn’t hide them either. What would they do if she freaked out in the middle of making love with them? Would they turn their backs on her before showing her the door?

  She mentally shook her head. No, they weren’t that type of men and she needed to prepare them just in case. “What if I have a flashback and freak out?”

  “Then we’ll stop and help you through it,” Cam said as he moved to her side. He took her hand in his, lifted it to his mouth and kissed the back of it. “We won’t ever force you to do something you don’t want to, sweetheart. If you need to stop, then everything stops.”

  “But what if you can’t?” she asked.