Mean Crush

by K L Wood

  “The what?” I asked.

  “It’s like a rainbow, but you can only see it in the moonlight. There’s, like, only seven places in the world where you can see it.”

  How the hell did she know this and I didn’t?

  “Where would you go to see it?” I asked.

  “There are some amazing places to see it, but I’d like a more obscure place where most people wouldn’t expect to find it.” She smiled, and I damn near melted. “Kentucky. Cumberland Falls. Who would’ve guessed something that amazing would be in Kentucky?”

  “Consider it on my list,” I said blindly. I didn’t lie, but how could I promise something like that? Why would I promise something like that?

  “You should have a backup plan.” My dad shoved mashed potato into his mouth and washed it down with a gulp of water. “You know, just in case the travel thing doesn’t work out.”

  He was right. I knew he was right, but it pissed me off just the same.

  “You should start now,” Tabitha put in, ignoring his statement. “Get a blog going. Maybe do a small road trip and take some pictures of obscure places no one really knows about.”

  That wasn’t a bad idea.

  “Maybe,” I said.

  “I can help if you want.” She shrugged, not looking me in the eyes. “With setting up the blog and stuff.”

  “Tabitha helped with my YouTube make-up channel,” my sister added. “She’s really good.”

  “If I do it, I’m sure I can figure it out,” I said.

  Tabitha’s face fell when I said that, and it squeezed around my heart. I wanted to say something to make her smile again, but it was best to leave it alone. The last thing we needed was to spend time together. We were on very different paths, and Tabitha was off-limits.

  4

  Meeting the Boyfriend

  Tabitha

  My plan to make Reed jealous at dinner was a complete and utter failure. He barely looked at Derek and me the entire night. My overdone attempts at flirting were met with weird glances from Paige and my parents, but Reed must have thought I was like that with Derek all the time and he wasn’t surprised or, worse, he didn’t care. The only reaction I did get from him was a glance of disgust when he caught us tongue wrestling goodnight in the driveway, which pretty much represented how I felt about it as well. I counted to nine this time instead of the usual seven. Not fun.

  “What’s with him?” Derek nodded toward Reed, who was already heading down the sidewalk back to his house.

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  “He got a thing for you or something?”

  I snorted. “Pfft, if the goal of making me miserable can be called a thing, then yeah.”

  “He was staring at you practically the entire night and looked at me like he wanted to rip my damn throat out.”

  What?

  Heat rushed over my body. “He wasn’t staring at me.”

  “Ah, yeah, he was.”

  I spun my pointer finger around the ends of my hair. “Reed can get protective sometimes. He’s sort of like family.”

  “Like a big brother?”

  I cringed. Thinking of the guy I’d been crushing on all these years as a brother was more than disturbing. “Can we not talk about Reed?”

  He smiled and pulled me in closer. “We could talk about prom night.”

  Ugh.

  “The hotel rooms are booked. Everything’s set for the big night, condoms and all.” He wiggled his eyebrows. He meant to tease, but it crawled under my skin and sent a shiver down my spine. Sort of like that time I read about a guy who had a spider lay eggs in his ear. Okay, maybe not that bad, but pretty close…especially if sex with Derek would be anything like kissing him.

  The front door opened, and Paige and her parents came out. I was saved.

  “Listen, I’m gonna head home,” Derek said. “Got some Madden planned.”

  “Okay, see you tomorrow.” I turned my head and planted a kiss on his cheek when he leaned in.

  Derek got in his car, and I went to hug Auntie Jo and Uncle Matt goodnight.

  Paige gritted her teeth. “I don’t know why you’re saying goodnight. You’re sleeping over.”

  I scrunched my brows together in confusion. “I am?”

  Her eyes widened into a don’t-you-dare-screw-me-over glare. “Yes, you are, remember?”

  Oh. That meant Bryant was coming over, and they were going to have a make-out session while I found something better to do. It’s not that her parents didn’t know they were having sex. Her mom had gotten her on birth control. But her dad drew the line about doing anything like that in the house. So I was the decoy. They figured if I was in the room with them, then nothing R-rated was going on.

  Her parents went to bed around nine, and that was when I’d go into the den and read until Bryant had to leave at ten-thirty. His parents were strict on the eleven o’clock curfew. They originally wanted it to be nine on school nights, but he made a deal that if he kept up his grades, he could have an eleven o’clock curfew. The sex must’ve been really good, because he made the honor roll every semester.

  “Oh yeah.” I smacked my palm to my forehead. “I’ll be over in a bit. Just have to pack a bag.”

  Paige looped her arm through mine. “I’ll come with you.”

  As soon as we were in my room, Paige shut the door. “Okay, truth time.”

  I grabbed a pair of jeans out of the drawer. “About what?”

  “Are you still crushing on my brother?”

  I stilled before shoving pants and a shirt into my backpack. “What makes you ask that?” Instead of looking in her direction, I rummaged to find a pair of boxer shorts and my The Killers T-shirt for bed. Reed had tossed it to me after the concert with a, “Don’t say I never gave you nothing.” It was faded from black to dark grey and the neck was so over-stretched that I had to cut my own hole. Although I cut too much and it always slid down my shoulder. Derek once said it was kind of hot, so I stopped wearing it in front of him.

  “Oh, I don’t know.” Paige exaggerated her sarcasm. “Maybe the part where you were trying to make him jealous with Derek.”

  “What does it matter? He’s not into me, so what’s the point of talking about it?”

  “I don’t know about that. Reed’s been acting different around you this past year.”

  I zipped up my bag and slung it over my shoulder. “If he is interested, then he has a weird way of showing it.”

  “Reed has always been weird.”

  But a good weird.

  “So you never answered. Are you crushing on him?”

  “It’s complicated.”

  “Just be careful with him,” she warned. “You know how he is with girls, and I don’t ever want it to get awkward with us.”

  “It’s not happening, so I wouldn’t worry about it.”

  Although I really wished it would happen.

  Reed

  “You’re seriously letting them get hotel rooms for the night?”

  My mother filled up her tea kettle for her usual bedtime chamomile. “Yes.”

  I raked a hand through my hair. “A little irresponsible, don’t you think?”

  She chuckled. “And what did you do on your prom night?”

  “We’re not talking about me.”

  “Stop being so misogynistic. They’re already having sex.”

  I winced, not wanting to get into a conversation about my sister’s sex life. “Well, what about Tabitha? She’s not.”

  She narrowed her eyes at me. “First of all, Tabitha isn’t my daughter, and second, what the hell was up with you during dinner? You looked about ready to jump across the table and attack her boyfriend.”

  “He’s a tool, and I think you giving them free rein like this is stirring a hornet’s nest.”

  The image of him violating her mouth in the driveway scraped against my brain. How the hell did she put up with that? She couldn’t possibly enjoy it.

  “I think you’re taking the o
verprotective brother thing a little too far with her.”

  She was right. I was taking this too far, but not because I saw her as a little sister. I wasn’t even all that pissed off about the hotel rooms. Tabitha had a right to do what she wanted and sleep with whom she wanted…except that jerkoff. She could do so much better than him, and it made my head hurt to think of him poking and prodding her.

  The front door opened, thankfully ending this conversation with my mother.

  “I’m going to my room,” I muttered under my breath and headed down the hallway, but not before I heard Tabitha’s laughter echoing through. That damn girl spent more time at our house than her own.

  I should have never come back here for spring break. I should’ve locked myself up in my apartment and did a week-long reading binge like I usually did.

  “Come a Little Closer” by Cage the Elephant poured through my speaker. It wasn’t nearly as loud as I wanted it to be. I opened my laptop and Googled “moonbow.” The pictures were pretty incredible. The photography classes I’d taken would come in handy if I went through with that blog idea Tabitha had.

  A soft knock rattled my door, and my stomach flipped. I closed my browser. “Come in.”

  Tabitha walked across the threshold in boxers and a band T-shirt I’d given her once.

  She still had that thing?

  It looked like it had seen its fair share of wear and tear, and it was hot as hell on her. I turned down the music and opened my messages. “Need something?” I deleted a message from Michelle saying that she heard I was home and wanted to hook up.

  “I forgot my Kindle and was wondering if I could borrow one of your books.”

  I nodded toward my shelves full of worn paperbacks. “Be my guest, but you’ll probably be disappointed. I don’t do romance novels.”

  She started reading them when she was thirteen, tucked away in our lair. She never stopped since.

  “Your loss.”

  I smirked as I watched her walk over in bare feet. Her long brown hair flowed down her back, and as she reached for one of the books, that T-shirt slid down, revealing her shoulder. I rubbed at my eyes and tried to go through my other messages, but I could barely read a thing. Tabitha had no idea how sexy she was, which was even more of a turn-on.

  “What do you have against romance books anyway?” she asked.

  I still refused to look at her. “They’re predictable. Worn-out themes and corny happily ever afters.”

  “People who read romance aren’t trying to find out if they have a happy ending but how they do.” She sat on the end of my bed, a book about a zombie apocalypse in her hand. “What matters most is all the stuff in between, the journey and the obstacles. No matter how much the characters deny it, the reader knows they are perfect for each other. The ending is about how those two people finally see that, too.”

  “Be Still” by The Killers started playing softly in the background. This time, I stared into those incredible brown eyes of hers, all dreamy and hopeful. Her face like the sun.

  “What do they finally see, exactly?” I asked.

  “Who they really are and what they could be together once they let their guards down and admit they love each other.”

  My heart must have stopped beating in that moment. I swallowed, unable to rip my eyes from hers. “But in real life, it doesn’t always work out.”

  “That’s because you’ve never loved a woman enough to let her in.”

  I frowned, looking back at my screen. “You read too much.”

  “So do you.”

  I couldn’t help but smile.

  “I like this song,” she said. “Turn it up.”

  I did, and she lay across my bed on her stomach, opening the book.

  I grabbed my Kindle and tossed it to her. “Pick me out a book.”

  The corners of her mouth rose into a huge grin. “You know I’m gonna pick a romance, right?”

  “I know, and you better make it a good one, because I won’t be reading another.”

  She sat up and crossed her legs in excitement. She flipped her hair, revealing the soft skin on her neck and that exposed shoulder. My mouth twitched, wanting to taste and explore that one spot. I was about to grab one of my mother’s pajamas and force her to put it on.

  “You have ten more seconds before I change my mind,” I warned.

  She barely flinched as she tapped through my Kindle, cool as a cucumber.

  “There. Got it.” She tossed me back the device and picked up the zombie book.

  I looked down at the cover in surprise. “This is a vampire book.”

  “It’s a paranormal romance. I figured you’d appreciate the cross-genre. It has some action and blood, too.”

  I handed it back to her. “No, I want your favorite. Not something you think I’d like.”

  A blush touched her cheeks. “I’d rather not.”

  “Why?”

  “I’ll give you a top ten, but not my favorite.”

  “Your top favorite or I’m not reading it,” I challenged.

  “Fine.” She tapped on the screen and handed it to me without looking my way.

  “Mean Crush?”

  She rolled her eyes. “Just read it.”

  I thumbed through the first few pages until I came to the opening quote.

  “So the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing.” —T.S. Eliot

  Not a bad start. I grabbed a sticky note from my nightstand drawer and wrote down the words.

  Tabitha failed at hiding a grin. “You’re going to hang a quote from a romance novel on your sacred wall?”

  “No. I’m going to hang a quote by T.S. Eliot.”

  “Still found it in a romance book.” Tabitha perked up at the next song on my playlist that came on. “What song is this?”

  “‘Just Like Honey’ by The Jesus and Mary Chain.”

  Her lips slightly parted, and she closed her eyes as she soaked in the lyrics and the mellow guitar. “I love it.”

  Me, too.

  When she opened her eyes again, her gaze met mine. I knew I should turn away, but I couldn’t. I didn’t know if it was the song or the pureness of what I saw behind those irises. Not purity in the sense of chastity or cleanliness, but there was something strong and genuine about her soul that would be impossible to tarnish. I’d kill the fucker who ever tried to.

  The song ended, and I looked down at my Kindle. “You should probably go back to Paige.”

  As much as I wanted her to stay, it would only be playing with fire.

  “Hand me a sticky note, please.”

  “You really need to invest in a proper bookmark.” I gave her the paper, and she marked her page.

  “This is a proper bookmark.”

  “Along with gum wrappers, napkins, ripped paper, pens, or anything else you can find within reach?”

  “Hey, it does the job, right? And I respect the book by not dog-earing it.”

  I side smiled. “Go on and get out of here, so I can read in peace.”

  5

  Prom

  Tabitha

  Prom night. Everyone was ridiculously giddy, as if this crap didn’t happen every year for high school seniors. Like our prom would somehow be more special than all the proms in the history of proms. It was simple: we’d dress up, dance, get trashed with friends, then screw our dates in hotel rooms. So romantic.

  I was about ready to hurl chunks.

  “Are you okay?” Paige asked. “You look really pale.”

  I wiped off the beads of sweat forming at the crown of my forehead and started applying foundation. “Coming from the girl who hasn’t been a virgin for two years.”

  “It’s not a big deal. But,” she grabbed my arm to make sure I paid attention, “you don’t owe Derek anything. If you don’t want to, don’t. Okay?”

  I nodded a few times and looked back in the mirror. “What was your first time like?”

  She laughed. “I already told you.”

  “I
know. Just let me hear it again.”

  She sighed like my request was annoying but didn’t hide her smile. “He was worried about me, making sure he wasn’t hurting me.” She pressed her hands to her cheeks as she looked in the mirror. “It was…exactly how I imagined it to be.” She giggled. “Of course, he came in like thirty seconds, but after that first time…mmm, it was different.” She looked down at me. “If he comes too fast, definitely go for seconds. It’s so much better.”

  I sat up straighter. I was going to do this, finally become a woman.

  A loud knock sounded on Paige’s door. We were so not ready for pictures.

  “Come in,” Paige said.

  The door flung open, and Reed glared down at us. “Listen, I know Mom and Dad are a little naive about what’s going down tonight.” He tossed a sticky note on her desk. “If you need a ride or if anything happens, I’ll pick you up. You know how they are about drinking. And for fuck’s sake, don’t overdo it, and don’t get in the car with anyone who has been drinking.”

  Paige scrunched her nose. “Um, I think I already have your number, but thanks.”

  “It’s not just for you and Romeo.” He looked over at me, his jaw tight as he eyed over the both of us. ”Just so you know, you don’t have to have sex on prom night. It isn’t a rite of passage, got it?”

  Paige faked a vomit. “OMG, Reed, we are seriously not having this conversation with you.”

  “Grow up, Paige.” He swallowed. “This isn’t just about you.” He left the room with a slam of the door, and I tucked his number into my palm.

  “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say my brother has the hots for you.”

  Yeah, right.

  She eyed the paper in my hands. “You’re keeping his number?”

  “Well. Yeah. Just in case backup is needed.”

  And maybe some future texts here and there.

  My dress was blood red, which also happened to be Reed’s favorite color, and no, I didn’t get it because of that. The truth? I fell in love with the dress the moment I set eyes on it. It was high waisted with a deep V neckline. The spaghetti straps crisscrossed over my bare back. The inner skirt flowed down to my ankles and had two slits rising to about mid-thigh. Sheer fabric of the same color flowed over it, giving only a peek of my legs. It was hot and so grown up, I barely recognized myself in the mirror.