Under the Northern Lights

by Tracie Peterson

  She sunk to the ground. ‘‘Oh, God, help us. Help me.’’

  Chapter Fifteen

  Jayce pushed north in the direction from which he’d seen Leah come. The snowfall had covered the trail, but he was certain that if he continued in this manner, he would find some sign of his brother. The crisp air stung his nostrils and ice formed on his mustache and beard. It was considerably colder than when they’d first started the journey. He wondered how long they’d actually been gone; he’d managed to lose track of the days in his worry over Leah.

  Slowing the dogs, he tried to find some sign of the trail. There was nothing, even though this had looked to be a main thoroughfare, according to John. The snow had clearly buried the evidence, and the dogs were tired from battling the trail. Jayce knew it would be easier for them if he cut the trail for a while. Jacob had taught him this during one of the other storms.

  Jayce halted the dogs and let them rest while he took up his snowshoes. It wouldn’t be easy to break the trail, but it would help the animals, and that was of the utmost importance.

  ‘‘Come on, boys,’’ he said, taking hold of the gangline. Jayce worked to clear a path wide enough for the dogs, all the while looking for any sign of his brother having passed this way.

  He tried not to think of how angry Leah would be when she awoke and found him gone. After her comments the night before, Jayce knew there would be no reasoning with her. A weight settled over him. Marriage was hard work, and he and Leah had scarcely had time alone together since their wedding. Chase had come between them in so many ways.

  ‘‘All of my life you’ve caused me trouble,’’ Jayce declared, as if Chase could hear him. ‘‘All of my life you’ve tried to exact some kind of revenge on me, and none of it has ever made sense.’’

  Eventually the snow evened out and Jayce could see that it wasn’t as deep. He took off his snowshoes and positioned himself behind the sled once again. The dogs were happy to have their head again. The lead dog, especially, seemed to have renewed energy for the day as he pulled eagerly against the weight.

  The next morning Jayce felt his cause rather hopeless. There was no sign of Chase. Any tracks he might have left had been covered by the wind-driven snow. Jayce studied the landscape for any discrepancies and found none. He thought perhaps Chase had taken a different direction. If so, Jayce would be hard-pressed to figure out what direction he’d gone.

  ‘‘Lord, I need your guidance. I need to know where to go and how to find my brother.’’

  Jayce continued to search the trail. There was an abundance of dwarfed birch and willows. Rounded tussocks, dangerous to the sleds when hidden in the snow, were barely visible in areas where the wind had drifted the snow. It was a lonely, desperate country.

  Clouds moved in, subduing the light. Soon it would be night and another day would pass without Jayce having anything to show for it. He let his mind drift to Leah. He knew Jacob had promised to get her back to Last Chance. Jayce could only hope she’d been cooperative and sensible. He couldn’t endure it if she tried to come after him and got hurt.

  Up ahead the trail seemed more notable. There looked to be signs of activity. There were numerous animal tracks. Snowshoe hare, fox, and even a wolf or two. Jayce felt for his sidearm. It might be nice to hunt something down for his supper. He didn’t relish the idea of eating smoked salmon and crackers once again.

  Then he noted other tracks. They were human.

  Chase.

  Jayce didn’t dare even breathe the name lest it somehow jinx his search. Once again he halted the sled. Leaving the dogs anchored and resting, Jayce walked ahead, following the tracks. There seemed to be something wrong. The tracks were staggering first in one direction and then another. There was no real sense to their pattern. If they did belong to Chase, perhaps he’d grown ill or was hurt.

  Glancing back, Jayce could see he was a considerable distance from the dogs. He didn’t like that idea and retraced his steps back to the sled. Once again he took hold of the gangline and led the dogs himself.

  The dogs were agitated. They were good at sensing trouble, and Jayce couldn’t help but wonder if he was walking into an ambush. It would be like Chase to feign illness or some other trouble. Jayce pulled out his revolver just in case.

  The tracks veered to the west. The path was more open here, but the tracks were just as strange. It almost seemed as if the one who’d made them had been dancing instead of walking. What could it mean?

  Another ten yards and a stand of stunted spruce revealed that someone had taken refuge beside them. A blanket remained behind as evidence. Jayce anchored the dogs and went to retrieve the piece. He held it up against the dimming light and felt his breath catch. Blood!

  Jayce looked around him, searching past the spruce and the other vegetation. Someone was injured. If not Chase, then someone else. Either way, they would clearly need some kind of care.

  Jayce hurried back to the dogs and pulled the hook. ‘‘But what if it’s a trick?’’ he questioned. The lead dog cocked his head and gave a whine, as if to question Jayce in return. ‘‘What if Chase left this and it’s just animal blood?’’ His mind raced with questions. ‘‘But why would he do that? What would he hope to gain?’’

  Jayce moved out with the dogs, still wondering at the situation. He felt his skin prickle. Every sound seemed magnified— every movement was suspect.

  The path came to a creek. The ice looked solid enough, but just as Jayce was about to cross it, he noticed that there was a smaller trail that ran alongside the frozen water. For reasons that were beyond him, Jayce turned to follow the path. It wound back and forth as it followed the outline of the creek. Snow had drifted here and hid any tracks.

  Jayce stopped the dogs and knelt several times to see if he could brush away the snow and spy any clues. There appeared to be nothing and he pressed forward cautiously. The dogs sensed his concern and began to whine. One of the swing dogs let out a mournful howl that caused Jayce to seriously consider turning back. Something just didn’t feel right.

  When they rounded the next bend, Jayce spied something on the trail up ahead. He stopped and strained to see. It appeared rather furry. He thought of Leah’s wounded bear and drew a deep breath. Perhaps the thing had come here to die. Then again, maybe it wasn’t dead yet. Jayce gripped the rifle tighter and began to walk slowly forward.

  As he drew closer, however, he could see it wasn’t an animal at all, but rather a man. Native, from the looks of his clothing. But it could be Chase, he thought. He felt a catch in his throat. He held his breath. Was this a trap?

  Halting the dogs, Jayce secured the sled, then gingerly made his way to the man on the ground. ‘‘God help me,’’ he murmured as he poked at the man with his toe. The man didn’t move.

  Carefully, Jayce reached down and rolled the man over. He jumped back at the reflected image of his own face. Only this face had been cut—sliced several times by some sort of animal. The pattern suggested bear. Perhaps Leah’s rogue bear.

  ‘‘Chase, can you hear me?’’ Jayce leaned down to ascertain if his brother was yet alive. There was a faint heartbeat and shallow breathing. The man was barely alive.

  Helaina’s recovery was slow but steady. Leah managed to secure healing herbs at the small village where Jacob had left Brownie. She faithfully tended Helaina, saying very little and offering nothing more than medical care.

  ‘‘You can’t just go on like this,’’ Helaina said that morning as they prepared to head out once again. Jacob and John were busy with the dogs, so she thought it the right time to speak to Leah.

  Although Leah looked up from her packing, she said nothing. Her expression seemed to challenge Helaina to continue. ‘‘I know you’re angry at me, but if anyone has a right to be mad, it’s me.’’

  ‘‘And how do you figure that?’’ Leah was clearly intrigued.

  ‘‘We had Chase Kincaid at hand, and you let him get away. Now he’s off doing whatever he pleases.’’

  �
��‘It’s not enough that this obsession of yours has cost me everything I care about,’’ Leah said frankly. She stared hard at Helaina, and it was easy to see the disgust in her expression. ‘‘I wouldn’t even be here if it weren’t for you. You have no right to condemn my actions.’’

  ‘‘But you have the right to condemn mine? I hardly see where that is fair.’’

  ‘‘Nothing about this trip has been fair. Fair doesn’t even enter into the picture. You are a selfish, self-driven woman, Mrs. Beecham. Had you not had to have your revenge on the world for the loss of your husband and parents, you might have done the sensible thing and settled down to remarry and have a family.’’

  ‘‘This isn’t about my family,’’ Helaina retorted angrily.

  ‘‘No, but it is about mine,’’ Leah countered. She squared her shoulders and put her hands on her hips. She appeared to wait for Helaina to comment on this. Instead, Helaina refocused on Leah’s role.

  ‘‘You have to understand—by leaving Chase, you put us days behind in his capture. He might even escape all together. All you had to do, once he was drugged, was tie him up and throw him in the basket with me. It should have been fairly simple.’’

  Leah looked at her oddly but said nothing. Helaina continued. ‘‘He’d be here now, on his way to justice, and your husband would be at your side. Do you not see how you are the cause of your own misery?’’

  ‘‘You are by far and away the most ruthless and uncompassionate woman I’ve ever known.’’ Helaina bristled at this but allowed Leah to continue. ‘‘Your own brother suffered because of you. You weren’t there when he discovered what you’d done. He was heartbroken to realize you would probably end up dead. How he must be suffering even now—not that you would care.’’

  ‘‘I care,’’ Helaina said, surprised at Leah’s words. She’d tried not to think of Stanley or how she’d disappointed him.

  ‘‘You care only so long as it doesn’t cost you anything—as long as you can get your own way in a matter.’’ Leah pulled her long dark hair over her shoulder and began to braid it in a furious manner. ‘‘You are a spoiled woman who is used to having her own way. You have a separate set of rules designed for yourself. The rest of us have to do your bidding or you use your rules against us.’’

  ‘‘I don’t have any idea what you’re talking about. I’ve only worked to see justice done.’’

  ‘‘You’ve worked for revenge. You’ve worked to prove something to yourself and to your brother. I’m not even sure you know what it is you’re trying to prove, but it drives you on—and God help the man or woman who gets in your way.’’

  Helaina felt the words stab deep into her heart. Was this truly how Leah perceived her? How others perceived her? ‘‘You don’t understand—’’ ‘‘Nor do I want to,’’ Leah interrupted. ‘‘I spent far too long trying to understand. Trying to forgive you and give the matter over to God. I tried to pray for you, to help you get well, and now I have to contend with your condemnation once again.’’

  ‘‘I’m not condemning you. I merely wished that you hadn’t left Chase behind.’’ Helaina’s words came out rather stilted. ‘‘I might have a different way of doing what I think to be right, but that doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate your position.’’

  ‘‘It’s not my position that worries me now,’’ Leah replied, securing her braid. ‘‘My husband is out there facing that monster. Jayce is a kindhearted, loving man who has labored with the decision to track down his own flesh and blood. You only care about getting the job done, but my husband has to face that he’s sending his own brother—his twin brother—to his death. Imagine someone asking—no, demanding—that you send Stanley to his death.’’

  Helaina felt tears come to her eyes. Leah was right. She hadn’t really cared about Jayce’s feelings or how it might affect him to hunt down his brother like some kind of rabid dog.

  ‘‘I’m sorry,’’ she whispered.

  Leah looked at her for a moment and shook her head. ‘‘Sorry doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t bring Jayce back here safely, and it doesn’t return the things that have been lost or stolen in this.’’

  Helaina had no idea what Leah meant, but she tried to ease the tension. ‘‘Look, sorry may seem to just be an empty word to you, but I truly mean it. I’m not one to offer it lightly. I know I’ve been demanding in this matter, but look at the harm Chase has done. Do you want to be responsible for his continuing to kill and wound? I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t at least try to see to his capture.’’

  ‘‘There are a lot of things I can’t live with,’’ Leah replied in an eerie calm that unnerved Helaina even more. Leah grabbed her parka and left the tent without another word.

  Helaina, much to her own surprise, burst into tears and buried her face in her hands. ‘‘What have I done? What do I do now?’’

  Leah felt as though a noose had tightened around her neck. Every word, every thought that had been exchanged with Helaina had drained Leah’s sanity and energy. She hated herself for the things she’d said, for purposefully trying to make Helaina feel the same depth of pain that she herself felt.

  ‘‘I would be better off dead,’’ she whispered as she stalked off away from camp. She looked to the skies overhead. ‘‘Why not just kill me? Why must I suffer more? You’ve proven your point. You’ve shown me how wretched I am. I already believed it. I’d already asked for your help and deliverance, and here I am—angry and ugly. It’s no use for me to go on. I can’t be helped this time.’’ She began to cry, the tears that she’d held back on the trail refusing to abate.

  Leah fell to her knees. She pounded her fists against her thighs and let out an anguished sob. It was all just so hopeless. How could she ever be alone with Jayce and not see his brother and remember what he had done to her? Those memories would never fade—they were permanently planted in her mind like hidden dynamite that would go off when she least expected it.

  Her nature had fought against the anguish and sorrow in order to survive, but Leah no longer wanted to survive. What was the point? If she couldn’t love Jayce and give herself to him without fear of the past, what was the sense in living?

  Chapter Sixteen

  Helaina heard someone come into the tent and presumed Leah had come back to continue her attack. Looking up, she was surprised to find Jacob instead. ‘‘What are you doing here?’’

  ‘‘I heard you crying. What’s wrong?’’ He knelt down beside her. ‘‘Are you feeling worse?’’

  ‘‘I feel terrible, but not because of my health.’’ She wiped her eyes with her hands. ‘‘Your sister thinks I’m a horrible person.’’

  ‘‘Leah said that?’’

  ‘‘Well, not exactly that.’’ Helaina looked away and tried not to remember what Leah had said about Jacob loving her. She saw no proof of that, and she figured now that Leah had been lying in order to worry Chase.

  ‘‘Then what did she say?’’

  Helaina bit at her lower lip. She wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to have this conversation. A part of her reasoned that Jacob might offer comfort, but at the same time another part suggested that he might confirm Leah’s statement.

  ‘‘Please tell me. I want to help if I can,’’ Jacob said, reaching for her hand.

  Helaina pulled back quickly. ‘‘She said I was selfish. She said that I was the cause of all of this.’’ She waved her hand. ‘‘She blames me for everything—for her being kidnapped, for Jayce being forced to go after his brother, for . . . for . . . everything.’’ The tears came again. ‘‘I only did my job. I only did what I thought was right. No one seems to understand my motivation. . . . my reasoning in this.’’

  Jacob sat cross-legged a few feet away but said nothing. It was almost as if he needed to hear more before he could comment.

  ‘‘I know that no one wanted me to leave Seattle alone, but I had to show Stanley that I was still trustworthy and capable. He had given me a job to do, and I had done it fairly well to
that point. After all, I’m the one who figured out that Jayce Kincaid was not the man we were after.’’

  ‘‘That was a good thing, Helaina, but had you just talked to some of the rest of us—even questioned Jayce himself—you probably would have learned that without having to send us all the way to Seattle.’’

  ‘‘But that’s not how things are done in apprehending criminals. All criminals suggest they are innocent. Every man or woman who ever broke the law has some excuse as to why it wasn’t their fault or why they shouldn’t be charged.’’ She pushed back her long blond hair, wishing fervently she’d at least attempted to attend to it before Jacob’s arrival. It had been so long since she’d had a bath or any chance to clean up. She knew she must appear a frightful mess. Perhaps that was why Jacob looked at her with what seemed a suspicious expression.

  ‘‘Even guilty,’’ she continued, ‘‘Jayce Kincaid would have declared that he had nothing to do with those crimes, and his statements would have been no different than any other criminal I’ve helped to apprehend. So you see, it isn’t quite as easy as you’d like to believe. I had a job to do, and I did it.’’

  ‘‘All right, so we set aside your deception from last summer and focus on Seattle,’’ Jacob said softly. ‘‘Your brother relieved you of your job. He forbade you to go to Nome. Yet you disregarded his decisions and went ahead on your own. You didn’t even wait for us.’’

  Helaina realized she couldn’t deny his words. She thought for a moment. It suddenly seemed very important that she make him understand. ‘‘Have you never felt responsible for something? Something that you had to see through to completion?’’

  ‘‘Of course.’’

  ‘‘Well, this was no different. I knew Stanley had relieved me because he felt the job too arduous for me. Perhaps he even felt that I wasn’t as cunning and smart as Chase Kincaid.’’