Without Hesitation

by Talia Jager

  “Maybe, but the Authority will always be after us and I can’t drag her into a life like that. I have to bring her home and forget about her.”

  “Just like that? No matter how either of you feels?”

  “It’s what she deserves.”

  “I know you think that, but do something for me. Talk to her. Tell her how you feel. See where she stands with all this.”

  “Fine,” I agreed, more to get her to shut up than anything. A small part of me hoped that maybe there was a way and maybe by talking to her we could figure it out.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Akacia

  Briar spread out the maps in front of us. “Obviously I can’t map out the whole universe. The most I can tell from the pictures I’ve seen are that the planet can sustain life, but not well. The land looks barren most of the time. I’ve never seen any indications of water on the planet, but I’ve only seen so many pictures.”

  I studied the maps. There were a lot of red Xs on planets. “You’ve ruled these out?”

  “Yes. Ones that are gas planets, unlivable, or we can verify don’t look like the pictures.”

  There were still so many planets without an X. How would they find their people?

  “You like Ever,” she said.

  Startled, I looked up. “I do.”

  “Have you forgiven her?”

  I looked out the window and chewed on my lower lip. “Yes. I understand why she did it, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. I still have nightmares. So, yes, I forgive her, but I still have a lot to work through.”

  “She’s been through a lot with Caspar. He didn’t torture her the same way he did you. She feels responsible for all of us and all the people we left behind. After she turned you over to Caspar, she spent days held up in her room crying and having her own nightmares. She doesn’t think we know. She never faltered when we found a way to get to you. I’ve never known her to have feelings for anyone. Not the kind she has for you.”

  I wanted to say that I had the same crazy feelings. That I had fallen for Ever the moment I laid eyes on her for the first time back on Valinor. That even though she turned me over, I couldn’t hate her, not really. I tried, but deep down…I couldn’t. I stayed quiet, unsure if I could trust Briar with my feelings yet. I didn’t really trust myself.

  “I’d love to see Ever happy. She deserves it.”

  Looking back down at the maps, I asked, “How many of your people does Caspar have?”

  “Originally about a hundred. Not sure how many are left,” she answered. “My DNA was spliced with a white tiger.”

  I looked at her.

  “My hair is normally white. I dye it different colors. White is so colorless, ya know?” The corners of her mouth turned up and her blue eyes sparkled.

  “I like the pink.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Were you all born on a planet?”

  “I believe so.”

  “So suffice to say your families could be on the planet you were born on?”

  “It’s entirely possible.”

  “Do you remember anything about living there?”

  “No.”

  “So quick to answer,” I said.

  “I was young.”

  “Have you tried hypnosis?”

  “No. You think something like that would work if we were so young?”

  “I think it’s worth trying. One of the space stations might have a hypnotist,” I suggested.

  “I’ll look into it. So it doesn’t freak you out that we’re part animal?”

  “Does it bother you that I’m part robot?”

  Briar laughed out loud. “You’re not part robot. You just have nanites. Not nearly the same thing.”

  “And you just have a little animal DNA in you. No biggie.”

  The rest of the crew came into the room. “So, Zabe says he has almost everything ready,” Ever informed us.

  Zabe confirmed with a slight nod. “I only need one thing.”

  “Where do we get it?” Huxley asked.

  “The Ignix Station. There’s a guy there. I can make a trade.”

  Concern passed over Ever’s face, but she didn’t say anything. She just nodded.

  Briar’s fingers were gliding over the control pad. “We can be there tomorrow.” Meeting my eyes, she said, “There’s a hypnotist there.” Briar filled them in on the rest of my idea and they seemed interested.

  “Which one of us will go under hypnosis?” Huxley asked.

  “I will,” Briar said. “Ever, there’s something I want to buy.”

  Ever’s eyebrows arched. “Must be big for you to be asking beforehand.”

  “I want to buy an AI.” Briar bit on her lower lip waiting for Ever’s answer.

  “You mean a robot?” I asked.

  “Essentially, yes. As you know, our computer is very personable. I’d like to download her into a body. She’d be able to assist us better.”

  “Very well. If you think you can do that, I’m okay with it.”

  “Really?” Briar’s eyes sparkled.

  “Sure,” Ever said with a shrug.

  Briar threw her arms around Ever and squeezed. “Thank you!”

  She sprinted over to the computer and her fingers started flying. Something dinged and she stopped and looked at a different screen. “The results are back on the nanites.”

  This got everybody’s attention.

  “Akacia’s nanites are specifically healing ones. They are fascinating things. Programmed only to do that one thing.”

  “Can they heal anything?” Ever asked.

  “Not everything. She can still die. Let’s say your head gets chopped off—”

  “Briar!” Ever barked.

  “Sorry. I just wanted you to understand that she can die, and this is only speculation because I have nothing to test my theories on, but if something doesn’t kill her instantly, she should heal.”

  “Can they be reprogrammed?” Huxley questioned.

  It seemed like everyone in the room was holding their breath. Briar continued, “Akacia’s father was brilliant. I tried to reprogram them, but they can’t accept new instructions.”

  “Could somebody hack them?” Zabe asked.

  “They seem to be hack proof, but it’s possible something could disrupt them.”

  “What does that mean?” I inquired.

  “I’m still running tests,” she answered. “I would have loved to have known your father.”

  Me too, I thought. I had so many questions and hated that I would never get the answers to them. I sat at the table staring at my veins, running my fingers over them, picturing what the nanites looked like and what they were doing.

  “Do you want to come to my room tonight?” Ever asked with her eyes on the ground.

  Hooking my finger under her chin, I tipped her head up until our eyes met. I smiled and nodded. Words weren’t needed. She took my hand and led me to her room. Nero slipped in before the door closed and made himself comfortable at the bottom of the bed.

  Ever handed me a pair of shorts and a tank top, which I took and changed right then and there. Her breath hitched when I dropped my pants. I enjoyed watching her blush as her eyes traveled over my almost naked body. Slowly, I put the top on, but I left the shorts on the bed.

  After a long moment, she took off her clothes. I bit down on my lip so hard I almost drew blood. She was absolutely gorgeous. I licked my lips, my mouth had suddenly become dry as I gazed at her body. She was everything that I dreamed of. She was my soul mate.

  Ever crawled into bed after me wearing only underwear and a camisole, pressing her body to mine. My heart jumped into my throat with her so close to me. Her hand rested on my hip and after a moment, her fingers trailed up my side. A gasp escaped my mouth when she kissed the nape of m
y neck, my shoulder, and my back. I melted from the inside out.

  I turned toward her and our eyes locked. I cupped her face and ran my thumb back and forth across her lips. Quiet moments like these made me happy.

  Chapter Twenty

  Everleigh

  Being in bed next to her was all I ever needed. If I died right now, I’d die happy. Kaci ran her fingers over my back, making shapes, and designs. Suddenly I realized what she was doodling. She was tracing ‘I’ then a heart then ‘U’ over and over. My breath caught and my eyes pricked. I swallowed against the ball of emotions in my throat.

  I woke up the next morning with her arms around me and her breath on my neck. Our legs were tangled under the sheet. I smiled and closed my eyes again, not wanting to move. She stirred and let out a soft moan. Her lips brushed against my neck and trailed from my ear down my shoulder and up again, kissing, sucking, nibbling on my ear. I remembered what she was tracing on my back before falling asleep.

  “Oh, Kaci…” I mumbled, trying to turn around, but she stopped me.

  “Morning breath,” she giggled, covering her mouth.

  I used the bathroom first. Something caught my attention in the mirror. Getting closer, I ran my finger over the small, purple bruise on my neck. With a smirk on my face, I turned around and looked at her. She was propped up on the bed watching me.

  “You marked me,” I said.

  She laughed. “I did.”

  I crossed the room in two strides and put my mouth on her neck. “I should mark you.”

  She laughed. “It wouldn’t stay. I’d heal.”

  “Let’s find out.” I began kissing and sucking on her neck until a pink spot appeared. I don’t know why, but it turned me on to see my mark on her neck. Before my lips reached hers, she said, “Nope. My turn for the bathroom.”

  Practically skipping over to my dresser, I opened it and my eyes rested on her ring. I had forgotten about it. I picked it up and waited for her to come out of the bathroom. I held it up as soon as she did.

  “My ring!”

  “I found it after you…left.”

  “I wasn’t sure if I had it while on Caspar’s ship. My memories are a little fuzzy. I’m so glad I didn’t lose it.”

  As I slipped the ring back on her finger, I felt the heat rise to my cheeks. Kaci was blushing too as she stared at our hands. Before she could say anything else, I reached back in the drawer and grabbed a clean outfit. She laughed.

  “What?”

  She looked through my clothes. “You seriously don’t have anything other than black.”

  “Not really.”

  She huffed and put the clothes on. “They’re a little tight.”

  “You have more curves than I do.” I placed my hands on her hips.

  “Are you calling me fat?”

  Laughing, I said, “No way. Just more curves and I like them. I like them a lot.”

  She threw her head back and laughed. The sound was so beautiful it left me wide-eyed. When she settled, I captured her lips. I tightened my grip on her hips, silently wanting more. She moaned loudly as our lips moved together. The kiss was soft and tender, hard and rough, slow and meaningful, fast and frenzied and I loved every second of it.

  Her hands were at the back of my neck, tangled in my hair. I knew she wasn’t sure what was next and either was I. I didn’t think she was ready for me to make love to her, but I didn’t want to stop.

  My intercom buzzed. I heard it, but my lips didn’t respond to my brain telling them to stop. It buzzed again. Kaci smiled against my mouth. “I think someone is trying to get your attention.”

  “I don’t care.” I mumbled.

  A third buzz made me pull away. I pressed my forehead to hers and tried to catch my breath. Swearing silently, I spun and hit the button to answer the door. Briar stood there. She looked from me to Kaci and down to her feet, and then blushed something awful. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize… We’re almost to the space station. You wanted me to let you know.”

  “Thanks.”

  “I’m guessing she doesn’t normally answer the door in her underwear?” Kaci smiled.

  I looked down and realized I was still in my cami and underwear. Heat filled my cheeks.

  Briar laughed. “Not usually.”

  Kaci closed the space between us. In a swift move, she seized my lips for one last searing kiss and then slipped out the door. “I smell eggs.”

  Nero took off after her.

  Briar tore her eyes away from Kaci walking away. “Well, that was…um…wow! You are so whipped.”

  Trying and failing to hide my smile, I asked, “How long?”

  “You have time to eat, though you should get dressed first.”

  “I’ll be right there.”

  The door closed and I sat on my bed for a minute reliving everything that had happened since the night before. I needed to talk to Kaci, really talk to her. I knew I shouldn’t get my hopes up, but the way she made me feel convinced me it was worth it.

  I finished getting dressed and hurried to the kitchen for breakfast. They were all seated at the table eating when I walked in. I helped myself to some eggs and sat down. Zabe and Huxley were talking about the space station. Briar chatted with Kaci. I sat back and watched them all interact. They were comfortable with each other. My crew didn’t look at Kaci as an outsider. And she shined here with them.

  “You’ve got something on your neck,” Zabe said to me.

  Briar spit out her drink while Kaci laughed.

  “What?” He studied me and then his eyes widened. “Oh!”

  I glanced at Kaci’s neck. Sure enough, hers was gone. She caught me looking at her and smiled, causing my heart to beat frantically again. Damn! Never thought that I would find someone who made me feel the way she did.

  Back on the bridge, I sat at my control pad, and refreshed my memory of the layout of Ignix Station.

  Kaci placed her hands on my shoulders and massaged them. “Tell me.”

  I let out a sigh. “This station isn’t one of the ones I’d rather go to.”

  “Because of the Authority?”

  “Yes.”

  “So we have to be extra careful.”

  We. She had nothing to fear from the Authority. Yet she lumped herself right in with us. Just another reminder that she wasn’t actually one of us no matter how comfortable she was here.

  Once we docked, Huxley, Briar, and Zabe disembarked. All of us had to go this time. It made me nervous to leave the ship unprotected, but it couldn’t be helped. Zabe went to find the person he was supposed to meet. Huxley went to the casino. Now that Caspar wasn’t paying us, we’d need the money. Briar headed to find the hypnotist.

  “So what do we need to do?” Kaci asked, walking toward the door.

  “I need to get some supplies loaded onto the ship, then meet with somebody. After that, I’m done. You can go do whatever you want. You don’t have to—”

  “I’m staying with you,” she cut me off.

  I bit my lip to hide my smile. “Let’s go.”

  Briar had called ahead to make sure Lael would be working. He was the one person at this station I trusted. Not only have we been working with him a long time, but I had enough dirt on him that he’d do anything I asked. He met us at the dock station.

  “Everleigh, it’s been a while. What do you need?”

  “Supplies. All the normal stuff.”

  “No problem. Shouldn’t take long.”

  I handed him the payment. “How is the Authority’s presence?”

  “On a scale of one to ten, maybe a four.”

  I held up a wad of money. “There’s a tracker on my ship. It’s disabled. I need it removed and left on the ship so we can analyze it.”

  He arched a brow. “Got it.”

  Revealing my weapon, I sai
d, “Only your guys go on my ship. No one else.”

  “Understood.”

  I stayed to the back corridors, hoping to avoid all security personnel. Kaci followed right behind me. My thoughts went back to the fact that she was hiding in the shadows for me and that wasn’t right. She was good, special, everything that I wasn’t and everything that I couldn’t have. No matter how I felt about her, or how she felt about me, we could never be together.

  Pausing outside a door, I said, “You should stay out here.”

  “Don’t push me away.”

  There was something I had to do and I didn’t want her to be involved or even see. “Kaci—”

  “Whatever it is, Ever, I can handle it.” She planted a quick kiss on my lips.

  Taking a deep breath, I knocked on the door. When it opened, a young dark-skinned guy with dreads greeted us.

  “Everleigh.”

  “Hey, Rigby.”

  His eyes drifted to Kaci. “Come in.”

  “She’s with me.”

  He nodded and closed the door behind us. “What can I do for you?”

  I took a container out of my pocket and held it up. “I’m here to trade.”

  Rigby nodded and led us to another room where an older man with slick-backed hair sat. “Siarl, you have visitors.”

  My heart thudded in my chest, not because I was scared of Siarl or his men, but because I didn’t like Kaci seeing the criminal side of me. Maybe it was a good thing. Maybe it would scare her off.

  “Is that the toxin?” Siarl asked.

  “Yes. It will paralyze anyone who breathes it in, kill anyone who is injected with it. No trace. No blood test can detect it.”

  “Excellent. Our offer stands.”

  “Actually, I’m going to need more.”

  Siarl stood, his gray eyes drilling holes into mine, but I held my ground. “I should kill you.”

  “Then my team will kill you.” I didn’t back down. “Many others want to get their hands on this. Maybe even some of your enemies. I’ll walk away. Sell it to someone else.”

  “You don’t want to make an enemy of me, Everleigh.” He looked at Kaci and I wrapped my empty hand around my weapon, just in case he tried something.