Rugged

by Ava Bloom

  I moved to fold her into my arms, but before I could, she was visibly gathering herself and turning towards her friends. “Well, what’s the prognosis?” she asked. From the tone of her voice, you would never guess that she was upset at all. I had to admire her for that – it took a specific type of courage to stay so calm in a situation like this.

  Bobby glanced back over his shoulder from where he was taping up Vicky’s swollen ankle. “Well, you’ll all live,” he said.

  “Phew,” Mallory said, grinning at him. Everyone chuckled a little.

  “I want to take all six of you down to town right now,” Bobby said seriously. “I don’t think anything’s too serious – if I’m not mistaken, this ankle isn’t even broken, just severely sprained. But I want to get some X-rays on the ankle and make sure that there won’t be any lingering effects from the cold on any of you. Looks to me like Derrick found you all just in time, though.”

  “Good,” Mallory said, her voice thick with emotion. She glanced towards me, but then her eyes flicked away again, as though she had shown all the emotion that she cared to in front of her friends.

  I still wanted to just…reach for her. I tried to quell that feeling, reminding myself that none of this was appropriate, that she was going to leave again – today, was it? – as soon as this was all over.

  But as she rode behind me on the snowmobile, all the way to the hospital, I couldn’t help reveling at the feel of her arms around my waist. She was clinging a little too tightly to me, almost cutting off my breathing at points, but I couldn’t find it in me to complain. In fact, I almost wished that the roads were worse, if only so that I could have her there, with her arms around me, for longer than the thirty-odd minutes that it took to get to town.

  The sun was shining that morning as I watched her walk into the hospital. I wanted to follow her – to make sure that she was really okay, maybe to have a private moment with her. I wanted to tell her that I’d been thinking about her – the whole walk into town, the previous night, and all morning…

  But I couldn’t do that. She was going to leave, and I had to let her go. Besides, right now, she didn’t need me declaring those sorts of feelings for her. She was worried about her friends, and she needed to make sure that they were all right.

  If she had any feelings for me at all, she knew where to find me.

  I watched her disappear inside, and then I turned the snowmobile back on and zoomed away, before Bobby and Joel could say anything.

  11

  Mallory

  I felt another surge of disappointment – just like the one I’d felt at waking up to Derrick’s empty bed – when I found out that Derrick hadn’t waited outside to see if we were okay. His two friends were there, Bobby and Joel, helping out with some of the other patients who had been brought in with everything from mild frostbite to more severe injuries – apparently a couple of roofs had caved in, with the amount of snow that had fallen!

  I was surprised to find that other than a couple colds and Vicky’s ankle – sprained, not broken, thankfully – we were all totally okay.

  “You’re thinking about Derrick, aren’t you?” Jane asked as we watched Vicky hobble out to the waiting taxi that would take us back to our resort.

  I glanced over at her and debated lying – but finally, I shrugged. “Yeah,” I admitted. I couldn’t help wanting to talk to him. To think him for rescuing us, to tell him how brave I thought he was for setting out on foot to get help, to thank him again fro bringing Bobby and Joel to us and getting us all to the hospital. I wanted him to know that I was okay, and I wanted… Well, honestly, I just wanted a hug.

  It had been a rough couple days. An emotional roller coaster. I remembered how comfortable it had been, curled up on the couch at the resort, sloppily trading kisses. I didn’t need exactly that at the moment. But a good cuddle would be nice.

  I sighed and shook my head, knowing that I couldn’t very well show up at his door. I had found his place by accident. He lived way out there so that he could get away from people. He had probably rushed off because he was so happy that we were gone from his space. He just wanted his solitude.

  I couldn’t intrude on that again. He clearly wasn’t looking to have visitors.

  I trailed after everyone else into the resort. There was something lackluster about the place. It had seemed so cozy before, but now… Now, I couldn’t help comparing it to Derrick’s place. And I couldn’t deny how much more charming I found Derrick’s place to be. I pictured it exactly how I had left it: smelling of cinnamon and full of people. I could almost imagine a life there.

  I didn’t know what I was thinking. This was just a fling, just a way of passing time on my holiday with a guy whom I would never see again.

  I slowly started packing up my things, trying to focus on how we would remember this trip. It was meant to be a trip for friendship and fun, but in the end… Well, we still had fun, I was pretty sure. Despite the nearly-disastrous skiing excursion, everything had been perfect. And even that cross-country excursion…

  It was strange that we’d ended up nearly at Derrick’s door. Almost as though the fates had been colluding to bring us together. Not that I really believed in things like that. Fate and gods and all that other mystic stuff was just there to comfort you that one day you might find someone perfect for you, without ever having to change yourself in an attempt to mesh two lives together.

  But there was a lot that I would have to change if I wanted to make things work with Derrick. I would never be able to keep up with my career, not out here. I would have to get used to living in a small town. And there were plenty of other, smaller changes as well.

  I didn’t know why I was even thinking about them. Derrick and I hardly knew one another.

  I found myself headed for his house later that afternoon though, regardless. I hesitated and then knocked on the rough wood.

  When Derrick answered it, he groaned. “Back again – already?”

  I stared at him for a moment, hurt coursing through me. His reaction was exactly what I’d expected from him, exactly why I hadn’t been sure that I should really go over there, regardless of what I wanted to say to him. But it also hurt to hear him say that he didn’t want me there.

  It felt like rejection. It felt like a slap in the face, after we’d slept together the night before last. I knew that it was just a one-night stand, but Derrick was acting as though he didn’t even like me, as though he’d just fucked me because I happened to be there.

  I turned to leave, hoping he didn’t see the tears in the corners of my eyes.

  “Hey – Mallory,” Derrick said, catching my arm. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he murmured, pulling me against him. “That was meant to be a joke. I’m sorry.”

  I sobbed, clinging to him, all the stress of the past couple days catching up to me. I’d tried so hard to keep it together for my friends, knowing that if I started freaking out too, we were one step away from pandemonium. They counted on me to be the cool and collected one, the one who solved things. I was independent, and I was driven. Stubborn, maybe. But they knew that they could count on me in situations like that.

  That didn’t mean that I always felt like I could count on me, though. And with Derrick gone… I’d had this nagging feeling as though I’d been missing some support that I needed.

  “Easy,” Derrick said into my hair, his hand lightly stroking my back.

  I took a deep, shuddering breath. “Can I come in?” I whispered.

  Derrick didn’t bother to say anything; instead, he tugged me inside, still keeping me close in the safe circle of his arms. “Is everything okay?” he asked, his voice just as hushed.

  I nodded against him, twisting my fingers in the fabric of his shirt. “Everyone is okay,” I told him. “I just…” How did I explain it to him? I couldn’t exactly tell him that I’d missed him. Again, I hardly knew the guy.

  But I guess I missed the possibility of an ‘us’. It had hung almost tangibly over us the wh
ole time that I’d known him – never more so than the night we’d tumbled into bed together. His disappearance at the hospital, without even caring to check that we were okay…

  “I’m sorry I took off like that,” Derrick said, and when I pulled back to look at his face, he looked sheepish. He rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s not that I wasn’t worried about you – I wanted to know that you were all okay. But it seemed like I was intruding on a private moment between you and your friends. And anyway, hospitals…kind of bother me. Too many memories.”

  “Of course,” I said, realization suddenly dawning. I remembered what Sam had said about Derrick’s grisly past as a soldier. I didn’t know any of the details about that part of his life, but I was sure there were still things he was working through, no matter how secure he seemed most of the time.

  “I’m glad to hear that everyone is okay, though,” Derrick said. He peered down into my face. “You look exhausted, though.”

  “I am,” I admitted. I shrugged and ran a hand back through my hair. “I didn’t sleep all that well last night – I thought that maybe something bad had happened to you, that the storm had…” I trailed off.

  Derrick looked like he couldn’t figure out how to respond to that. After a moment, he took a step back.

  What I would give to know what he was thinking.

  “I’m all packed,” I told him, wondering if I could get him to admit that he didn’t want me to leave yet. Instead, his face remained carefully neutral, and he nodded – but it was as though he was waiting for me to say something more. Of course, I was the one who had shown up on his doorstep.

  I swallowed hard. “Derrick, the other night was really special to me.” The words spilled out of me without conscious direction from my brain. I immediately wished I could take them back – but before I could continue, Derrick spoke.

  “It was for me too,” he said. He paused. “I don’t sleep with that many women, you know.” He grinned crookedly. “And I definitely don’t sleep with them here in my own bed – I take them back to their fancy hotel rooms!”

  I snorted. “I don’t have time to sleep with a lot of guys,” I admitted. “I mean, I take care of my needs. But with my work, I’m so busy all the time. I don’t really have a chance to meet anyone. Except the people I work with, but I would never be so unprofessional as to sleep with one of them.”

  “You’re leaving…tonight?” Derrick asked.

  “Tomorrow.” I paused, giving him another chance to ask me to stay. But he didn’t say anything. Finally, I shrugged. “I have to get back to work. It’s going to be an absolute mess – I missed one meeting while we were out cross-country skiing, and with the storm knocking out the power and everything else, I haven’t been able to check in yet.”

  “I would have expected you to do that before you came to see me,” Derrick said, looking as though he was only half teasing.

  I shrugged again. “I probably should have,” I told him. I didn’t know how to say it, but work just hadn’t seemed as important as coming to thank him right now.

  Derrick continued to stare at me for a long moment. “What are you doing here, Mallory?” he finally asked.

  I stared right back at him, wondering how to answer that. If we had sex again – if we even so much as cuddled again, I didn’t know how I was going to drag myself away from him. The last thing I needed was to become an emotional wreck. There was too much work for me to sort through upon my return. And I needed to hold it together and make sure that my friends made it home okay.

  I shook my head helplessly, taking a step back, as though distance could dull the spark between us. “I don’t know,” I told him. “I just wanted to say thanks again.”

  “You could have called, if that’s what you wanted,” Derrick pointed out. “I assume you’ve been able to charge your phone since you left.”

  I blinked at him, wondering at the coldness in his voice. “I just…” I trailed off, shaking my head again. “I should go,” I finally managed. I turned on my heel and fled.

  12

  Derrick

  I didn’t expect Mallory to show up at Joe’s that night – and especially not on her own. “Where are your friends?” I asked, when she cornered me at the bar. I was careful not to make eye contact with her, looking over her shoulder as though I was looking for her friends or for other patrons to serve.

  Mallory hopped up on one of the bar stools, silent for a moment. There were other customers, but I couldn’t drag myself away, even though she still hadn’t ordered anything. I could tell that she had something that she wanted to say, she just wasn’t sure how to say it.

  “We all decided to stay for a few extra days,” she told me. From the way she said it, I could tell that something about that wasn’t making her happy.

  I frowned. “It wasn’t your decision?” I asked.

  “Everyone else wanted to stay,” she said. “They feel like their trip got interrupted because of the snowstorm and everything. They want to have a relaxing few days at the spa, that kind of thing. Really go back feeling refreshed.”

  “Okay,” I said slowly. I still didn’t know why she was there at Joe’s – or why she had decided to stay if she seemed so unhappy with the decision. “You know you don’t have to do everything that your friends do, don’t you?” I asked her. “Even if you did come here with them. I’m sure they would have understood if you needed to go back without them.”

  “They would have understood,” Mallory agreed. “But because all of our tickets were booked under the same reservation, changing theirs changes mine as well. And because it’s the holidays, all the other flights are booked up, so I can’t just buy a new ticket. There was a chance that when all of our tickets were moved over to the new flight, I could have bought one of the seats again. But at that point, the cost was so ridiculous that I figured it was probably best just to suck it up and stay for the extra day.”

  “Ouch,” I said, shaking my head. “What did your work say when you told them?”

  “I haven’t exactly told them yet,” Mallory admitted. “I have this huge meeting the day after tomorrow that I promised again and again that I was going to come back for. I’m trying to figure out if there’s anyone who could take my place there, or…” She trailed off, shrugging. “I know it’s such a stupid juvenile thing to do, but I’m thinking that my only other option is to lie and say that the weather caused my flight to get canceled or something like that. I don’t really want to lie, but I really don’t think my boss is going to be okay with me taking all this time off. Even if I’m not really taking time off, I’m just not in the office.”

  I shook my head, half tempted to voice my opinion on workplaces that treated their employees as poorly as Mallory’s clearly did. But I didn’t think she would appreciate that. Besides, there was something more important that I wanted to ask her: “What are you doing here, anyway? Where are your friends?”

  “They wanted to go to some art gallery tonight,” Mallory said, shrugging. “It wasn’t really my thing, and I begged off. I really should be doing work – I have a few reports that need to be written up. But I just wanted to ask…” She trailed off, blushing a little.

  I tried to puzzle together what she was trying to ask. Whatever it was, it was clearly embarrassing her. I thought back to the other night…and suddenly it dawned on me. I gave her a slow, lazy grin. “This is a booty call,” I guessed.

  Mallory’s blush intensified. “Not tonight,” she said quickly. “I know you’re working, and like I said, I have these reports. And I want to call it an early night anyway. But I’m in town for four more days. And I don’t know about you, but the other night… It was really good.”

  “It was really good,” I agreed. I thought about it a little. Could I continue to have sex with her without finding myself getting more and more attached to her? I didn’t know. But then again, it wasn’t like she was staying until the end of the season. She was just talking about staying for the next few days. We could fu
ck one or two times more and then…it would be over. I’d never see her again. Surely I could handle that.

  With how turned on I was, just watching her bite her lower lip right now, I didn’t think I could say no.

  “Dinner, tomorrow night,” I managed. “I know a great place.”

  “Okay,” Mallory said, a goofy smile breaking out across her face. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” She paused. “Where and when should I meet you?”

  “How about at your resort, in the lobby, at six?” I suggested. “We can walk over together.”

  “Great,” Mallory agreed.

  The next evening, she was there waiting for me, in a charcoal-colored sweater, black pants, and boots. I leaned in to kiss her on the cheek, unable to stop myself even though I wasn’t sure if I was maybe being too forward. But she was the one who had extended her stay there in Twin Valleys, and she was the one who had mentioned something about taking extra time off work so that she didn’t miss potential opportunities there in our small town.

  Mallory smiled shyly at me. “You look nice,” she said, her eyes scanning my green flannel and dark-wash jeans.

  “Not as nice as you,” I told her.

  “I didn’t know if I was supposed to dress up or not,” she said, grimacing at me. “You didn’t tell me where we were going.”

  “You look perfect,” I told her.

  Her eyes glittered with amusement as I led her into the bowling alley. “Seriously, bowling?” she asked.

  “You don’t hate it, right?” I asked, suddenly nervous.

  “I don’t hate it,” she said, shaking her head. “I’m terrible at it, but I don’t hate it.” She grinned. “Actually, I can’t remember the last time I got to go bowling. It’s not something that I make time for, usually.”

  “This is a weekly thing, here in Twin Valleys,” I told her. “Not to be a cheap date, but it’s $2 per person per lane, plus they have deals on food and drinks as well. I was thinking we could get a pizza, maybe some cheese fries as well, and some beers…and go bowling.”