Round & Ravishing

by Mary E Thompson

  I couldn’t argue because it was true. Again. But there was no way Sawyer knew why I was really going on that tv show.

  “I think you should go,” Noah said softly.

  I nodded, waiting for him to let me out when Sawyer spoke.

  “You don’t mean that, Noah. You can’t seriously believe what she says over what I say. You’ve known her a couple weeks. You’ve known me your whole life.”

  “And I’ve never been embarrassed by you. I’ve been proud of my brother. My big brother who takes pictures that change people’s lives. Who helps people see the beauty in the world. I’m not seeing that beauty now, Sawyer. I can’t sit here and have you insult Tara like this.”

  I looked up in time to catch a nasty look from Sawyer. He narrowed his eyes at me and said, “This isn’t over. I’ll prove that you are who I know you are. You’re not going to hurt my brother.”

  “Go, Sawyer. Now,” Noah said roughly, his voice a mix of pain and anger.

  Sawyer glared at me one last time then got to his feet and stormed out of the restaurant.

  Noah dropped back onto the seat next to me and pulled me into his arms. “I’m so sorry, Tara. I had no idea he would attack you like that. He’s always been protective of me, but I can’t believe he said all those things.”

  I shook my head and pulled back from him. I waited until Noah met my eyes and said, “Everything he said was true. Except me still being in love with Patrick. I did those horrible things because I thought that was what everyone did in Hollywood when I first got there. I was young and stupid and trying to make my own way. I never should have been so nasty-”

  “Stop,” Noah said gently. “You don’t have to explain anything to me. Your past is your past. I’m not going to hold it over you. What I care about is who you are now.”

  “Thank you.”

  He narrowed his eyes at me then closed them. “I do have to ask-”

  “About the pictures?”

  He nodded.

  “We thought it would be fun and sexy. One night I did a little strip tease for him and he took pictures. Then he did the same and I took pictures. There’s not a video to go along with it. Or at least, if there is, I don’t know about it. A few weeks ago, the pictures of me showed up online. Patrick issued a statement saying his computer was hacked and he wasn’t responsible, but I don’t really believe that. I’m no one in Hollywood. If anyone had hacked his computer, I’m sure they could have found much more interesting stuff about him than a few pictures of me. I’m the only one who would have known they came from him.”

  “I’m sorry you had to go through all that,” Noah said gently, wrapping me in a hug.

  The waiter set our food down, including Sawyer’s dinner. We thanked him and waited for him to leave before we continued.

  “Is that why you were suspicious of me when we met?” Noah asked.

  I nodded, forking a ravioli covered in sauce. “The pictures came out a few days before we met. I had reporters at the shop and at my house. When we met I thought you might have been a photographer who followed me.”

  “And you still went home with me?” he asked with peaked eyebrows.

  I laughed. “You were sexy. I guess I was willing to risk it. Plus, you said you weren’t and I’ve never heard a reporter come up with pediatric oncology as a fake profession.”

  Noah laughed. “Be careful. They’ll start using it.”

  I rolled my eyes and nodded. “Probably. Don’t tell your brother.”

  I was teasing, but Noah’s eyes darkened and all humor slid from his face. “I’m really sorry about him, Tara. I had no idea he’d be like that. I really thought he just wanted to get to know you. I’ve been telling him about you when I’ve talk to him the last couple weeks. I never thought he’d let the ugliness of his work get to him.”

  I nodded in understanding. “It’s hard sometimes. Paparazzi is tough. I know they’re trying to do a job, but they’re a pretty cutthroat bunch. It doesn’t surprise me at all that your brother is that way with me, but it bothers me that he’s trying to split us up.”

  “He’s not going to. I’ll talk to him. Make sure he knows how amazing you are. He’ll come around.”

  “What if he doesn’t?”

  Noah shook his head. “Let’s not worry about it right now.”

  We ate our dinner quietly, sharing bites of food. By the time we were ready to go, I felt better about everything that happened.

  Noah walked me to my car. Before I opened the door, he pressed me against it and kissed me. I felt how much he loved me, and how much he wanted me, in his kiss. His hands ran up my sides and cupped my breasts under the cover of my coat. The stubble on his jaw scraped over my neck as he heated me up and made me wish there was a place we could go to be alone.

  “Come home with me,” he whispered against my throat. “I’ve missed you this week.”

  I held him close, needing to feel him. His lips blazed over my skin, bringing me close to agreeing. I wanted to go home with him. I wanted to sleep in his bed, in his arms, but knowing Sawyer would be there had me hesitating.

  “Noah!” I heard through the fog of lust.

  Noah heard it, too. He lifted his head from my neck and looked over my shoulder. “It’s Sawyer,” he whispered in my ear. “Stay with me.”

  Noah took my hand and led me over to where Sawyer was leaning against his SUV. “What are you still doing here?”

  Sawyer’s eyebrows pulled together. “I don’t have keys to this thing and I wasn’t going to walk home.”

  “So you just stood out here while we had dinner?”

  Sawyer shrugged. “You didn’t give me much of a choice.” His eyes swung to me. “I know we didn’t get off on the right foot, but I am sorry for being cruel. Do you have any siblings?”

  I shook my head.

  “If you did you’d understand. Not many people make it out of Hollywood with their souls in tact. I have to watch out for my little brother.”

  “And that means harassing my girlfriend?”

  Sawyer shook his head, looking like he truly was sorry.

  “You’re right. I’ve been a first class asshole since I’ve been back. Especially where Tara is concerned. You’re the first woman Noah’s introduced me to. When I heard your name, I got paranoid that you were trying to clean up your tarnished image by latching on to the best man I know. I should have given you a chance.”

  “Thank you,” I said softly, hoping he meant it and wasn’t an even better actor than I was.

  “Noah, can I buy you a beer? Or we can go home and catch up? It’s been forever since we’ve spent any time together.”

  Noah glanced at me and I shook my head. “You guys have a good night. I’ll see you Tuesday.”

  “Tara, you don’t-”

  “You need time with your brother, Noah. I’m not going anywhere.”

  He turned away from Sawyer to focus on me. “Are you sure about this?”

  I nodded. “Definitely. Enjoy your weekend. I’ll see you Tuesday. You can call me though.”

  He kissed me softly and nodded. “Thank you.”

  I nodded and walked back to my car. I heard the two of them joking and laughing before I got in my car. Noah needed time with his brother. I just hoped Sawyer’s apology was true and Noah wouldn’t have to spend their time together defending me.

  Or doubting me.

  Chapter 19

  I didn’t hear from Noah the rest of the weekend. Sure, I told him to hang out with his brother, but I expected a text or something from him. Instead I got nothing.

  And I had no idea what that meant.

  Who I did hear from was Olivia. She had some paperwork or something for me to sign to give me access to Town Hall for the tv spot. We agreed to meet for lunch on Monday to make sure everything was in order.

  I was checking my phone, toying with the idea of sending Noah a text, when Olivia showed up.

  “Hey. Thanks for meeting me.”

  I nodded. “Yeah, of co
urse.”

  Olivia and I hadn’t gotten back to the friendship we had in high school, but I was doing my best to let go of the past and at least be cordial, maybe even friendly.

  “They’re kind of going above and beyond with the security stuff this week. All the actors are showing up and everyone is getting anxious. They need all these papers filled out before you can come into the building.”

  I flipped through the papers she handed over, wondering if it was really all worth it. The picture Sawyer painted of me had been echoing in my head all weekend. I’d been a horrible person for a while. It was the way things were in Hollywood in order to survive, but I let it go deeper. I let it get to me.

  I didn’t want to be that person anymore. I wanted to be who Noah thought I was.

  “Maybe I shouldn’t be doing this, Olivia. Maybe I should just let it all go.”

  “What?”

  I shrugged. Before I could explain, our waitress came over to take our orders. When she was gone, I continued, “Noah’s brother showed up last week. He started telling Noah all these horrible things I did before. When I was in California. I did things that would have made what you did in high school seem like a walk in the park. I was cruel. And it was all to get on stage. To end up with jobs. Jobs that I loathed once I had them.”

  I took a breath and risked a glance at Olivia. She was looking at me with a mix of confusion and horror. I pushed forward, knowing I had to keep talking.

  “I thought I was past that shit. That when I moved back I could be the person I wanted to be. I thought I left that part of me behind when I left California.”

  “It’s hard to live down our past. I’ve spent years wishing I never did what I did to you.”

  “It wasn’t your fault, Olivia.”

  She shrugged. “It’s hard to let go of that. I know our friendship ending was my fault. But this isn’t about me. What do you want to do?”

  I shrugged. “I don’t know. A part of me wants to just not show up, but I can’t do that to you. You put your neck out to get me on this show. There’s still a part of me that wants to just go through with it, but it makes me feel sick. I don’t want to be like Patrick. Or any of them. Everyone here is so willing to be nice and friendly and helpful. Even you. How many years has it been since we’ve been friends? And you didn’t really hesitate to use all your new connections to get me on tv so I could embarrass my ex?”

  She bounced her head from shoulder to shoulder. “I wouldn’t say I didn’t hesitate. I never liked the idea, but I’ve never been able to say no when it was the two of us.”

  “We were a pretty good team once upon a time, weren’t we?”

  Olivia laughed and nodded. “We were. I know it isn’t the same, but I’m really happy to be back in your life.”

  I reached across the table and covered her hand. “Me too.”

  Noah was running late the next night and asked if he could meet me at girls’ night. I told him where it was and made sure I was there a little early so he didn’t beat me. We still hadn’t talked, but he did send me a text the night before to make sure I still wanted him to go Tuesday night.

  It was the longest we’d gone without speaking since we’d started seeing each other. It felt strange to say that, but I was having a hard time not having him as a part of my daily life.

  On top of that, I found out that the seller accepted my offer on the studio. It would take some time to close, but I was going to be able to open my own acting studio, for kids, in Winterville. I had a long road ahead of me, but I was more excited about it than anything I’d done in a long time.

  I walked into Bite Me! and sighed. Even though I tried to eat healthy most of the time, I couldn’t deny that Charlie’s cupcakes were heaven sent. Abby brought some of her treats too, but I usually caved and went for a fully loaded cupcake.

  My blueberry-lemon cupcakes were on the counter waiting for me. I noticed Charlie had set out the rest of what she had from the day, with little signs in front of each. I smiled and went over to thank her.

  “You’re awesome,” I said, wrapping my arms around her neck from behind. “Thank you for setting up the cupcakes so Noah knows what he’s picking.”

  Charlie patted my hands. “I figured it would make things easier on him. There were a lot of things left today and I would hate for him to grab something and not get what he was expecting.”

  “Everything you make is awesome.”

  “Thanks. I thought Noah was coming with you?” Charlie half turned in her chair to look behind me.

  I shook my head and sat next to her. “He was running late. Said he’d meet me here.”

  “Good. We’re all excited to meet him.”

  “I know I am,” Sam said. “Maybe I can pick up some of your new relationship, sexy mojo.”

  “Still not getting much sleep?” Charlie asked kindly.

  Sam shook her head. “No. The worst thing is when we try to have sex, she always wakes up. It’s like she can sense it or something. And then, by the time I get back to bed, or he does, the other one of us is asleep.”

  “That sucks.”

  Sam nodded solemnly. “I love Madison, but having a kid is hard. She slept through the night one night last week. I woke up every hour paranoid that something had happened.”

  Charlie and I laughed. “I hear that’s how things go. She’ll start sleeping soon and then you can get back to sexy times.”

  “God, I hope so,” Sam groaned.

  “Hope what?” Mandy asked, joining us.

  “Hope I can have sex again sometime. I’m so horny I think I might explode if he just looks at me, but I’m so tired I can’t even keep my eyes open long enough to see him look at me,” Sam whined.

  We all laughed at her and she joined in, resting her head on Mandy’s shoulder.

  “I went to see Vicki’s sister the other day,” Addi said, smoothly changing the subject.

  “What did she say?”

  “She was really nice. She’s running a few tests to make sure everything is okay and then we’ll go from there,” Addi explained.

  “That’s promising, right?”

  Addi shrugged. “I guess we’ll see.”

  “At least you’ll get some answers,” Sam said.

  Addi nodded. “It’s funny. You guys complain about all the shit that makes being a parent so hard and I get excited. I know it’s not going to be easy, but I really want to go through it all. The sleepless nights. The morning sickness. The painful labor. I’m looking forward to it. I just hope I get to actually experience it.”

  “You will. And if you don’t, you can adopt. There’s nothing wrong with adopting,” I told her, knowing Addi would be a great parent and no matter what, she and Joey deserved kids.

  “Hey,” I heard Noah say from behind me. “Sorry I’m late.”

  I stood and greeted him, giving him a quick kiss before I introduced him to everyone that was already there.

  “There will be a test,” Sam teased.

  “I look forward to it, Sam,” Noah told her with a wink.

  She rolled her eyes but laughed. I pulled Noah away for a minute so I could make sure everything was okay. There was something in his eyes that made me think things were not okay.

  “How are you?” I asked cautiously. I had no idea what to expect. After not speaking for days, and the way we left our date Friday night, he could have said anything.

  “Freddie died today.”

  I pulled him in for a hug, but I knew it wasn’t enough. “Oh, Noah, I’m so sorry.”

  He nodded and buried his face in my neck. “Thanks,” he mumbled. “I knew it was coming, but it was still really hard. His family asked me to be there. That’s why I’m late.”

  I sighed. “You didn’t have to come at all. You could have stayed there with them if you wanted to.”

  He shook his head. “I needed to get out. It just reminded me too much of Kenny. It’s so fucking hard to watch a kid die, Tara. All the ugly and evil in the world closes i
n on me. It’s like I can feel all the things my brother talks about. All the nastiness and deceit.”

  I nodded, but I didn’t really understand. I don’t think anyone could who hadn’t gone through what he went through. Death was a part of his job, but it was the hardest part. He never wanted to lose a patient but having the patient remind him of the cousin he lost was even worse.

  Before I could say anything else, Carrie and Drew burst through the door with baby Joel.

  “Traffic is a nightmare. I can’t wait for these famous people to leave town,” Carrie said. “I don’t know how you dealt with all this for years, Tara. It’s nice knowing you’re going to take that Patrick douche down a notch or two though.”

  “What are you doing to Patrick? What is she talking about?” Noah asked quickly.

  “The tv show Thursday,” Carrie continued as though Noah should know all about it. “She’s going to make sure all of Hollywood knows exactly the kind of guy Patrick is. He’ll never get another job if Tara has anything to say about it.”

  Noah turned on me so quickly I didn’t have time to process everything going on. “I thought you said you didn’t have anything to do with him?”

  I shook my head. “I said I didn’t love him anymore. And I don’t.”

  “So what’s this about a tv show?”

  “I set it up a long time ago. It’s not a big deal.”

  Noah lifted an eyebrow and stared at me. “It is if it means you’re out to destroy a person.”

  “You don’t know what he did,” I tried to explain.

  “Is he the one who leaked the naked pictures of you? The one you used to date?”

  I nodded.

  “And you think an eye for an eye is the right move? That he embarrassed you so you should get the chance to do it to him?”

  “It’s not like that, Noah,” I told him, but it was a lie. That was exactly what it was like. I wanted to make him pay for hurting me. I wanted him to regret ditching me and humiliating me. I didn’t care who else got hurt as long as it ruined Patrick’s career.

  “What is it like, Tara? Because it sounds to me like you’re exactly who Sawyer said you were. The same nasty woman he described the other night. You know, I defended you. All weekend he tried to convince me you hadn’t changed. That you were still manipulative and deceitful. I told him again and again that he was wrong. That he was just a photographer and only saw what he could through a lens. I was with you. I knew you. I threw my brother out of the house because of the things he said about you.” Noah paused and laughed mirthlessly. “He was right all along. I chose you over my own fucking brother and he was right.”