The Price of Fame - KJ1

by Lynn Ames

  She spent the rest of the day hiking the trails in the park and touring the ruins of cliff dwellings created from A.D. 600 to 1200. She marveled at the Cliff Palace, so well preserved that it was easy to envision hundreds of Anasazi people populating the structure, built literally right into the side of a cliff. She made the steep ascent up the Spruce Canyon Trail and climbed the ladder to access the Spruce Tree House, amazed at the ingenuity it must have taken to create such a beautiful and practical dwelling. Then she ventured over to the Balcony House dwelling before proceeding to several others in a different part of the park.

  The history and architecture fascinated her, and the engineering skill of the long-ago peoples astounded her. Beyond all that, there was something inherently spiritual about the place that beckoned to her, and Kate felt the pull of that at her core. She decided to spend a second night at the lodge before heading out in the morning.

  Once she had made the arrangements, she settled in for the evening and tried to read for a while. Her mind kept drifting to Jay, though, and she found herself reading the same paragraph over and over again.

  Finally, she gave up, setting the book aside and turning on CNN instead.

  That, however, made her even more melancholy than she already was, so she turned it off and closed her eyes, allowing her mind to wander.

  She felt so off balance, so rudderless. What was she going to do with her life when things settled down and she didn’t need to be out of sight anymore? By then, surely Jay would have gotten over her. In truth, at that moment she didn’t care about her professional future, but she knew that sooner or later she would have to do something. She was pretty sure her days as a broadcast journalist were finished; the business had very little use for out lesbians.

  So then what? A degree in American History made her well rounded, but not specifically qualified for anything. She could go to law school, something she had considered when she graduated from college. It wasn’t as if she couldn’t handle the coursework. But she didn’t think she really wanted to go back to school at that point in her life, not to mention 253

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  the financial resources it would take to do so. Frankly, she was too tired to think clearly about what she wanted to be when she grew up.

  She checked her watch: it was close to 11:00 p.m. Friday night in Albany. Peter should be back from his dinner with Jay by now. She called him, getting him on the second ring.

  “Hey, Technowiz.”

  “Hi yourself.”

  “How was your dinner with the most lovely woman in the world?”

  She couldn’t help the smile the mere thought of Jay brought to her lips.

  “Well, I enjoyed it. She, on the other hand, barely ate a bite.”

  “Why, did you cook it?”

  “Very funny, string bean. No, I brought takeout Chinese, which she said she loved, then managed to push around her plate for the better part of an hour.”

  “Hmm. That doesn’t sound like the Jay I know. That woman can eat more than most NFL linemen. I never understood where she put it all.”

  “It’s not good, my friend. She looks drawn and tired and emotionally distressed. It’s odd, really, I would have expected her to be more angry and insistent on getting answers from me. All she wants to know is when you’re coming home.”

  Tears tracked silently down chiseled cheekbones. Peter knew nothing of Jay’s background, and therefore couldn’t understand what Kate knew: Jay wouldn’t push this because, deep down inside, she expected the worst and thought she deserved it. It was what she had always gotten.

  There hadn’t really been enough time for Kate to establish a trustworthy track record. By disappearing, she had unleashed all of Jay’s doubts and insecurities.

  Kate knew a moment of uncertainty. Was she doing the right thing by staying away? There was silence on the line for several moments. “Did she make out okay in Jacksonville?”

  “Yeah, said she got some great human-interest stuff and a few minutes with President Reagan. Said he was very charismatic.”

  “Mmm. I know; I’ve met him, too. Lousy politics, but an engaging man.”

  “That’s pretty much what she said.”

  “Did she, um, say anything about finding anything in the house?”

  “No, but I did notice a profusion of roses in vases everywhere I turned. You wouldn’t have had anything to do with that, now would you?”

  “Me? Nah, not a romantic bone in my body.” She knew Jay was a very private person and probably wouldn’t have shared the information about the flowers and the comic books, but it was worth asking.

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  Anything that told Kate that her lover knew how she felt would have helped soothe the pain a bit.

  Peter snorted. “Where are you and where are you heading next?”

  “I’m still at Mesa Verde. I’ll head out first thing in the morning and point myself in the direction of Sedona. I’ll probably make some side trips along the way, so I’m not really sure how long it will take me or where I’ll detour to, but I’ll call you when I settle for the night.”

  “Okay. Kate, I called Barbara when I got home tonight and asked her to stop by and see Jay tomorrow night.”

  “Why?” There was a note of alarm in her voice. “Is she sick?”

  “Heartsick, to be sure. And if she keeps going the way she is, she’ll be physically sick soon enough.” He gave her a minute to compose herself before continuing gently, “I just thought maybe Barbara could get her to talk a little. Right now she’s trying hard to bottle everything up inside, and I’m afraid of what will happen when she lets it all go.”

  “You’re a good man and a better friend, Peter. Thank you for taking such good care of her. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.”

  “I know she means the world to you, Kate. And that means she means the world to me, too, and I know Barbara feels the same way.”

  “Thanks, friend, I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Will you talk to Barbara after she sees Jay?”

  “Yes, we made arrangements to talk. I figured you’d want a second opinion tomorrow night.”

  “Yeah. Thanks, buddy.” Kate would wait and see what Barbara had to say before deciding whether or not she needed to change strategy.

  “You’re welcome, Kate. Hey, take care of yourself now, you hear?”

  “Bye, Peter.”

  “See ya, babe.”

  Kate spent Saturday driving through parts of the Navajo and Hopi reservations, stopping often to talk to the Native American craftsmen who were selling their wares along the side of the road. Unable to resist, she purchased a beautifully woven Navajo blanket for Jay, as well as an intricately carved silver bracelet from a Hopi woman who had engaged her in conversation. I don’t know if I’ll ever have a chance to give these to you, love, but it makes me feel better to be doing something for you, so...

  She drove through Shiprock, New Mexico and Monument Valley in Arizona, her mind easily conjuring all those old westerns in which that exact scenery had provided the backdrop for countless hours of melodrama. She stopped briefly as the shadows grew long on Saturday at the South Rim of the Grand Canyon. She didn’t want to linger long there; it was too populated with tourists and she didn’t want to take a chance on 255

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  being recognized, although as rough as she knew she looked, she doubted anyone would know who she was.

  She found a small motel on US 89 south of the canyon, where she stopped for the night. After waiting until she was sure Barbara and Peter would have talked already, she made her nightly phone call, this time getting her friend on the first ring.

  “Well, what’s the word?”

  “Hello to you too, sunshine.”

  “Have you talked to Barbara?”

  “Yes.”

  “And?”

  “And she agrees with me that Jay is seriously depressed and missing you like crazy. She’s not eating, not sleeping, and even Fred knows s
omething is wrong; he follows her everywhere, tries to give her his favorite stuffed toys to cheer her up, and puts his head on her lap when she sits down.”

  “I’m glad he’s there for her.” Damn, should I go back?

  “Me too. She told me she tried to sit down and write the memorial service story today but couldn’t focus. So she took Fred and went to Kaaterskill Falls for a hike.”

  Kate’s breathing caught as she envisioned her lover sitting alone in the spot where they had shared their first picnic and their budding romance. There was a sharp pain in her chest where her heart used to be.

  Oh, love, she thought, it must have been so hard for you, being there by yourself.

  Peter continued, “She said she’s going to write the story tomorrow, stay at the house tomorrow night, and then travel to the city Monday morning.”

  “Have you seen anything?” Kate had asked Peter each night whether or not he’d spotted any stories about her or seen anyone anywhere near Jay.

  “Still not a word since the TV coverage the day the news release came out.”

  No, I won’t go back now. This way at least I know she’s still safe from scrutiny, if not happy. Her future is what’s important; she can get over me.

  Kate thought about that first bit of news coverage; that had been hard, each of the local news stations reporting that Kate had departed abruptly following some “adverse” publicity. To their credit, the competition had shown some class and hadn’t trashed her. She was grateful for their respect.

  “I think the reporter and photographers who hounded me must have been from the tabloids, probably the Globe and the Enquirer. Can you 256

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  figure out when they publish? I guess we know the Enquirer comes out on Tuesday. How about the Globe?”

  “I’ll have an answer for you tomorrow when I talk to you.”

  “Okay. Night, Peter.”

  “Bye, Kate.”

  On Sunday she stopped at the Wupatki National Monument to hike the area and investigate some well-preserved and diverse ruins before moving on to Flagstaff and the Kaibab National Forest, where she explored a number of hiking trails. She thought about stopping there for the night, but decided it was too early and ventured instead on a side trip to the Walnut Canyon National Monument. There she found a beautiful canyon with more unique ruins and a clear stream at the base. Finally drained of her manic energy, she returned to Flagstaff to find yet another small motel for the night.

  Her conversation with Peter was brief. He relayed that he was taking Jay to the train station early in the morning, and that she had told him to tell Kate that she loved her and missed her and wished that she were coming home. He also told the ex-anchorwoman that the upcoming week’s edition of the Globe was due to hit newsstands Monday morning, as in the next day.

  Kate informed him that she was in a town big enough to have a newsstand, and that she would check out the story first thing and call him right away to discuss it. They rang off.

  Peter dropped Jay at the train station Monday morning in plenty of time for her to make the 6:00 a.m. express to New York. She smiled sadly when she thought, Ah, Kate, it’s easy to be on time when there are no distractions in the house. Since she had some extra time to kill, she wandered into the newsstand. She browsed the magazines briefly before her eyes fell on the front page of the Globe. She snatched up a copy and threw some change on the counter just as her train was being called.

  Once onboard she picked her usual window seat in an isolated car and pulled the tabloid out of her briefcase. There were two pictures of Kate, the large one on the front apparently taken in Chicago the previous Wednesday, according to the caption. An old woman, identified only as

  “Aunt Marie, a mother figure to the deposed anchorwoman,” was greeting her. They were loading her suitcase into the trunk of a large sedan. The second picture, which was on the inside cover along with an accompanying story, was of Kate at the airport in Albany awaiting her flight to Chicago. As always, she looked calm and regal. Jay touched the pictures, as if the gesture would bring her closer to her lover.

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  Then her eyes fell upon the story with the banner headline that read,

  “Gorgeous Lesbian Anchorwoman Leaves a String of Broken Hearts Across the Country.” Jay groaned as she read, “Sensational beauty and now ex-anchorwoman Katherine Kyle abruptly disappeared from the airwaves on Tuesday, the day photographs were published of her and a mysterious blonde woman cavorting on a beach in the tiny tropical paradise of St. John. The Globe caught up to Ms. Kyle as she fled her hometown to lick her wounds with relatives in Chicago; she was quite alone, the blonde nowhere in sight. Apparently, that is not unusual for Kyle, as the Globe’s investigative journalists have uncovered a bevy of broken hearts the statuesque siren has left behind all over the country.

  “‘I was head over heels in love with her, but she was only interested in a casual relationship, something superficial. I broke up with her because I thought she was in love with someone else.’ So says a Vermont forest ranger with whom Kyle had a two-year affair in the early 1980s.

  Other women have told the Globe similar stories, painting the model-pretty ex-anchorwoman as a love ’em and leave ’em female Lothario who has never settled down, preferring instead to ‘use ’em and lose ’em,’

  as one poor victim of her considerable charms told the Globe . For now, she remains secluded with elderly relatives in a Chicago suburb, no doubt planning her next conquest.”

  Jay read the story over several times, her insecurities multiplying by the minute. She knew the forest ranger quoted had to be Jen, the EMT

  who had treated her the night of the attack that Kate had interrupted. She had no idea who the other women the story quoted could be, nor could she figure out who the woman was in Chicago who obviously had picked Kate up at the airport.

  Peter had said that Kate had seen the photographers and reporters and had managed to deceive them and lose them. What exactly did that mean? Who was this mysterious relative? Hadn’t Kate told her she didn’t have any living relatives, that Jay was her family now? Had she meant that, or was she just another in a long line of jilted lovers? Had she been played for a sucker?

  Kate had seemed so sincere, so in love with her. Was she really, or was she just a great actress? Parker, it’s the story of your life; if it seems to be too good to be true, it probably is. Jay started to get agitated. Why hadn’t Kate gotten in touch with her? She knew, according to Peter, that Jay was staying at the house; she could have called any time. And why wouldn’t she say where she was? Was she already off wooing some other unsuspecting potential lover? Jay’s overtired mind leapt to all kinds of conclusions.

  By the time the train pulled into the station and she made her way to the apartment before heading to the office, she was in a full-blown rage.

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  She was exhausted and emotionally wrecked, and beyond feeling anything but pain and betrayal.

  Kate ran to the nearest newsstand as soon as it opened at 5:00 a.m.

  local time, knowing that it was two hours later at home and Peter would already have the story in his hands. She looked at the photographs and read the story quickly, then again more thoroughly, raising her eyebrows at the fact that they had managed to unearth Jen. And then built a pack of lies around a truth her ex-lover had told to make it more plausible.

  Typical tabloid bullshit.

  She sighed and chewed her lip. Either Jay would see the story on her own or Trish or some other helpful person would call it to her attention.

  What would she think? Kate’s face was grim as she added up the likely conclusions that her sometimes-insecure lover might draw, if left to her own devices. She’d better talk to her.

  Peter answered his office phone on the first ring. “Peter Enright.”

  “Yeah, I know who you are.”

  “Good morning. I take it you’ve seen thi
s morning’s trash.”

  “Yeah. They took one tiny shred of truth, that Jen and I had a relationship and that she broke up with me because she thought, ironically enough, that I was in love with Jay all those years ago, and blew it up into me being the cold-hearted bitch-slut of the century.

  Yippee.”

  “Don’t sweat it, babe, you know how ridiculous the whole thing is.”

  “Yeah, I do, but does Jay? She has a tendency to let her imagination get carried away with her, Peter. She’s had a lot of really bad stuff happen to her and she doesn’t think she’s worthy of being loved. She simply doesn’t trust that that kind of love exists for her, and I can’t be there to reassure her.” She paused, sighing heavily. “I think I need to talk to her now, buddy; I’m sure she’ll see this and her brain will start working overtime.”

  Kate looked at her watch; it was nearly 9:10 a.m. in New York. “I bet she’ll go to the apartment before she heads to the office. Can you call her there now and conference me with her?”

  “Yep. I’ll put you on hold, dial her, then bring you back in and take myself out, okay? It will just be you two, I promise.”

  “Thanks Peter. You’re a prince.”

  “Don’t thank me yet.”

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  CHAPTER TWENTY

  ay, are you there?”

  “J“Yes.”

  “Kate, how ’bout you?”

  “Right here, Technowiz.”

  “Okay. Well, I’ll leave you two to it then. See ya.”

  There was silence on the line for half a beat as Kate just enjoyed the sound of her lover breathing at the other end.

  “Hi, sweetheart, how are you?”

  “Great,” Jay answered sarcastically. “You? Are you having fun on your vacation?”

  Kate was taken aback by the biting tone. “Is that what you think, that I’m just off having a good time?” she asked softly. “I miss you so much it’s tearing me up inside. There isn’t a second that goes by that I don’t think about you and wish I could be with you.”