Young Annabelle Series: Young Annabelle, The Truth About James, What My Heart Wants

by Sarah Tork

  I sighed. “You’re going to have to. I’ve already missed enough class this week.” I grinned, shaking my head at his lost puppy dog expression.

  “I don’t want you away from me.” James declared, seeming irritated all of a sudden. “What if some dip shit tries to talk to my girl again? I won’t be around to kick his ass.”

  “See you at lunch.” I smiled, trying to pull away, but he held on.

  “On no you don’t,” He grinned, pulling me in and kissing me. I felt my face heat up, because this time our kiss was witnessed by practically everyone in the hallway. He let go after a few seconds.

  “What was that?” I mumbled, barely coherent.

  He grinned and shuffled backwards. “That was my goodbye kiss.”

  “Your goodbye kiss? How many do you have?” I smirked.

  “You’ll see,” James smirked. “Later, Fireball.”

  I don’t know how long I’ve been sleeping, but when my phone beeped for the second time, my eyelids struggled to open.

  “What?” I muttered, with one eye open as I reached for my phone. Even with one good eye, the brightness of the screen was too much for it to handle. Before I could turn on my side lamp, my phone started ringing.

  “Hello?” I answered, warily. Who the hell was calling me at this time of night? I checked my alarm clock, it was just past midnight.

  “Hey,” The familiar voice hummed on the other end, making my heart beat faster.

  “James?” I whispered, snapping up into a sitting position. “Why are you calling me?”

  “I’m outside your house.” He informed nonchalantly. I flew to the window and peered out through the blinds for his SUV on the street. My eyes widened when I saw it right in front of my neighbor’s house.

  “Why are you parked near my house?” I asked him, quietly.

  I could hear him breathing on the other end. “Because…I want to talk to you.”

  “You want to talk to me?” I asked, incredulously. “I have nothing to say to you at this time of the night.”

  His breathing becomes hoarser. “You’re going to come out. Either you come out and we talk, or I’m ringing your door bell. You choose.”

  “Is that a threat?” I hissed, in disbelief. Who the hell did he think he was? Ordering me around like I was his slave!

  “It’s a promise. You get your cute ass out here in the next ten minutes or else I’m coming for you.”

  Dial tone.

  My jaw dropped. Did that asshole just hang up me? And did he just call my ass ‘cute’?

  I plopped down onto my bed, and rested my head into my hands. That was the second time this week a guy, who claimed to be into me, hung up on me. And I was sick and tired of it.

  I was finishing this tonight!

  I already finished things with Dean, now it was officially James’s turn.

  Careful not to make any noise, I got out of bed and grabbed my zippered hoodie, putting it on. My pajamas tonight were a pair of shorts and a tank top that showed a bit too much cleavage. I didn’t think about it seeing as I was so angry. I grabbed my phone and keys, placing them in my pocket. I opened my door and the hallway was dark, just as I’d left it. I wondered if mom and dad were working in the basement. I didn’t take into account my stomach, which was still filled with food. But in a weird way, it didn’t bother me as much as before. I felt full in a good way. But I also needed to use the bathroom. I quickly used the bathroom, feeling even better afterwords, like I had extra energy.

  I creeped silently down the stairs and saw that the basements lights were off. Mom and dad must have gone to bed. It’s a good thing too, my parents weren’t light sleepers, it took a lot for them to be woken up.

  I slowly unlocked the front door, thanking Mom and Dad for canceling our security system. They’d ordered a new one from another company and the installation guy was coming in a few weeks to install it. Apparently it was the newest technology. It was a good thing we didn’t have it now, or else there’s no way I could sneak out. I tiptoed out, closing the door as quietly as possible. I ran on the tip of my toes across the lawn towards his SUV.

  I came up to the passenger side door and heard the door unlock. I opened it and slid in. “You better make this quick. I already got into a fight with my parents tonight, if they catch me, I’m really going to be dead meat.”

  “Let me drive us somewhere where there’s a little more privacy.” James said. His hair was all messy and he’d worn just black jeans and a grey t-shirt.

  Even this late of night…..he looked so good.

  I sighed. “Fine, but not too far away.”

  He started the car and drove down four streets to the twenty-four hour McDonald’s. My stomach grumbled as I smelt the salty greasy fries.

  “You hungry?” James asked after parking his car. The parking lot was surprisingly full. I guess everyone was hungry for a late night snack tonight.

  “No,” I lied. “Let’s just do this. Why am I here?”

  “I wish the answer was simpler. But it’s complicated.” He said, gazing off at the Golden Arch.

  “It’s complicated? You’re still using that?” I repeated, incredulously. “And you still think you can love?”

  “You’re all I think about.” James confessed. “I love you like crazy. That’s the honest truth!”

  “Bullshit.” I hissed, scowling at him. “You don’t know anything about love.”

  “I do!” He growled. “I repeat, last Thursday was the best day of my life. I won the game, and I got my girl back.”

  “Then you got into a fight with your dad and needed to get away. Yes, I’ve heard all this before.” I snipped. “But, what happened on Monday had nothing to do with you fighting with your dad. No matter how many times I tell myself to forget it and forgive you, I just can’t.”

  “She controls a lot of people in this school.” James said, all of sudden.

  I jerked my head back in confusion. “Who controls a lot of people at school?”

  “Donna.” James answered after a few seconds.

  “Donna?” I repeated.

  “It kind of shocked me when I first met everyone. Nobody really said no to her.” James explained. “She started coming on to me last summer, but I’d met you and blew her off.”

  “Okay.”

  James exhaled. “She wouldn’t take no for an answer and the guys on the team kept jeering me on to do something about her, or else I’d look like a pussy. They didn’t get why I was saying ‘no’ to her.”

  “Okay,” I cringed.

  “I’m no pussy. I just like what I like and she wasn’t it. But everyone was always concerned about her feelings. I didn’t know what to do.” James explained. “Last weekend when you called, I wanted to answer, but she kept staring at me. So I sent your call to voice mail.”

  “Why didn’t you text me earlier?” I asked.

  “She never left my side. I mean, you saw the video. She wouldn’t leave me alone. When I texted you Friday night, she kept looking at me weird, like I was doing something wrong.” James said.

  “Why are so scared of making her mad? Is being popular that important to you?” I asked.

  “It has nothing to do with being popular, baby.” James said. “It’s so much more than that.”

  “Then what is it?” I asked, still not hearing what I needed to get past this. “I need more answers. It wasn’t just last weekend James, it’s been like this our entire relationship.”

  “It’s complicated.” He muttered, closing his eyes.

  “It’s complicated?” I repeated. “You keep saying that.”

  Silence.

  “Why were you so mean to me?” I whispered.

  “Because I’m a stupid asshole, that’s why.” James muttered, opening his eyes, revealing a misty sheen over them. “I could have punched myself for talking to you like that on Tuesday. On Monday, I couldn’t think straight after you telling me it was over, and then after school when I saw you flirting with Tom, I lost it.”
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  “Why wasn’t I good enough to stand beside you?” I blurted out angrily. “I look just as good as those girls you hang out with. Especially now that I lost weight. You know how many guys notice me now? A lot. I don’t get you.”

  “Who’s noticing you now?” James growled, his green eyes blazing like a meteor. “Who? That idiot in the hallway yesterday morning or those jerkoffs from the lunch room? Which one? I’m going to kick the shit out of the one who was looking at my girl.”

  I guess I shouldn’t tell him about my little altercation with Matthew today. Seeing as there was serious tension between the two, it would have definitely driven James to do something crazy.

  For the sake of his place on the Baseball team and my sanity, the Matthew incident was to never be discussed…ever.

  “Calm down.” I told him, exasperated.

  “You. Are. My. Girl.” He stated, growling the words with his mouth barely moving.

  I wasn’t normal…because the way he said it had an immediate effect on me.

  “I’m your girl?” I murmured, confused, yet exhilarated.

  His eyes melted into mine. “Always.” James murmured back, his voice humming with sweetness. “I’m a stupid, dumbass. When I get mad or things don’t go my way, my brain shuts off and I do things normal people don’t.”

  “Like yesterday during English, with your little performance.” I reminded. I still couldn’t believe he did that in English.

  “I was pissed off. Finding you dressed to kill, flirting with that jerk off, asking you what class you had next as if he were going to wait outside and walk you to your next one. I should have punched his face!” James growled before giving me a pained look. His voice turned tortured. “Baby, you looked so good yesterday. I was walking around with a hard on all day.”

  Okay, now there’s really something wrong with me, because for some reason, that last sentence came across as heartwarming. “Really?”

  “Really.” James assured, leaning over and pulling my hand over, placing it on his face.

  I caressed the side of his face. “I can’t go back to the way it was before.”

  “It won’t be like that ever again.” James assured, rubbing his lips against my palm. “Please.”

  “This is so messed up.” I whispered, feeling a million different emotions, one of which was pleasure from the brush of his warm kiss.

  “What do I have to do?” James murmured, staring deep into my eyes, leaning the side of his face into my palm. The light stubble that trailed his jawline tickled my palm. For a reason, deep in my heart, I knew I could never have enough of these soft caresses. Denying myself…of him, suddenly becomes unbearable.

  “You can start by holding me.” I whispered, getting up. He wrapped both of his hands around my waist and pulled me into his lap, just like in the parking lot at school today. But this time, we were touching chests as I turned to straddle him, hugging him tightly with my face nestled in the side of his neck.

  “You know, you’re my everything.” James whispered into my neck, squeezing his arms around me.

  “I hope so.” I chuckled lightly against the warmth of his skin. “Because, you…you dumb idiot…you’re my everything too.”

  This was all so messed up. The time for over analyzing everything wrong about ‘this’ situation was over…well for now at least. Being back on the same cloud as James again was….crazy.

  But, that’s because….I was crazy….about him and…….I loved him.

  I did.

  And didn’t love make people do crazy things? Like forgive.

  *~*~*

  “There’s more to this story isn’t there?” I asked, staring into his eyes. We were still in his car in the parking lot of McDonald’s, but instead of sitting parallel to one another in the front seat and drivers, or me straddling him, we layed down together against the back seat.

  It was kind of private, especially with the tinted windows of his SUV.

  “Monday was the worst day of my life, baby.” James murmured, caressing my head, which was resting on the inside of his arm. “There’s a lot more to the story, but I don’t want to stress you about it. It’s over now.”

  “For real?” I asked, tucking my body closer against his, feeling an instant sizzle stir inside of me. It’s been awhile….and my body was relishing being this close to him.

  “Yeah.” He whispered, grabbing my right hand and placing it over his beating heart. “My heart pounds like crazy whenever I’m with you or near you, and when I hear your voice.”

  “Me too.” I whispered, not taking my hand away. It was good where it was.

  “You see this, Fireball?” He eyed my hand against his chest. “That belongs to you.”

  “I hope so. But you know…it’s going to be awhile before I can move past everything a hundred percent.” I exhaled after speaking.

  He leaned his forehead against mine, whispering. “Last Monday, I was a monster.”

  I didn’t say anything…because it was true. He leaned his head back, slamming it against the back seat’s leather cushion. “Just like my fucking dad.”

  “He’s that bad?”

  James sneered. “He doesn’t take lip from anyone. He’s the true definition of an asshole. I got into a fight with him again tonight. He’s a funny guy too by the way. He got in my face for talking back to him.”

  “Why is he funny too?” I asked.

  “Because, if I didn’t say anything to him to begin with he’d just call me a pussy for backing down that easy. He wants everything, the fight and the back down. It makes him feel like the man.” James snorted.

  I raised my hand up from his newly calmed down heart and into his hair. Shockingly, he hadn’t worn a Baseball cap tonight. I raked my fingers through his hair. “That’s so messed up.”

  “No, what’s messed up would be turning into him. We’ve got the same DNA at the end of the day. From what I hear, his dad’s the same way. Grandpa was an asshole to Dad growing up and now it’s my turn to take it.” James cringed. “Anna, I’m going to turn into that, if I haven’t already. I don’t want to be like those guys.”

  The shock of hearing my ‘real’ name roll off his tongue left me momentarily shocked and elated. It sounded good coming from his mouth.

  “You’re almost that guy, but not quite. I doubt you’d take lip from any other guy at school.” I mentioned.

  He thought about it for a second before answering. “That’s true, but that doesn’t mean I have to be like that to my girl.” He caressed my jawline. “My dad treats my stepmom like shit. I swore to myself that I’d never treat my own girl like that, ever. The fact that some of that shit happened this week, and knowing I was basically a clone of him, kills me. I don’t want to be that guy with my girl. You’re my everything.”

  “How about I slap you the next time you step out of line?” I suggested, smiling.

  “Please do it, a nice hard one, right across my cheek.” James chuckled, pulling me into his chest again. My stomach growls against his and I hide my face into his neck in embarrassment.

  “I’m sorry.” I cringed, as a light chuckle escaped him.

  “Are you hungry baby, be honest.” James asked.

  “I guess I am, which is surprising considering I ate a lot during Dinner tonight. Or rather was forced to eat a lot during dinner.” I explained, exhaling. “Dinner was horrible by the way.”

  “You want to talk about it?” James asked.

  “Not right now. I think one asshole parent as a topic of discussion is enough for tonight.” I sighed. “How about you, are you hungry too?”

  “Yeah…but not for fries.” He stared deep into my eyes and whispered. “Can I kiss you?”

  “You already did.” I gave him a timid smile. “My palm, remember.”

  He smiled and shook his head. “No, I mean a real kiss, baby.”

  “Let me think about it for a second.” I pretended to ponder as his face went pained. I smirked at his tortured expression. “I’m kidding.
”

  “For real?” He asked, hesitant.

  I nodded, and he leaned in that fraction of inch, brushing his lips against mine. It was soft at first, but I don’t know if it was just me, but soft wasn’t going to cut it. I grabbed the back of his neck, pulling him in, restricting any open space between us as he practically pinned me down with his body.

  It’s been awhile….but he belonged here…with me…like this.

  *~*~*

  I know what you were probably thinking and the answer is ‘no’.

  James and I did not have sex. And it was the hardest thing to say ‘no’ to, especially because we’d both wanted to….badly.

  “Are you sure?” James panted against my lips, his hands resting against the zipper of my sweater jacket. I’d kept it up and it stayed like that, even when he had asked to pull it down a moment ago. It’s not that I wanted to take things slow, I just didn’t want to do that in the parking lot of McDonald’s.

  It was hilarious now that I thought about it.

  “I don’t want to have sex with you in the parking lot of McDonald’s, James.” I smirked, pulling away from his warmth, which made him pout.

  “But I missed you.” He pouted, giving me his best puppy dog face. “It’s been one week. One week where I couldn’t kiss you and touch you like before.”

  “Then don’t take it for granted again and you won’t have to go through that again. Okay?” I told him, moving myself into a sitting position. James followed and sat right next to me, pulling my body close to his.

  “I’m never going to make that mistake again. Ever.” He promised, kissing me once on the cheek. “I love your cheek, it’s soft and cold. It feels good against my lips.”

  I smiled a fool’s smile. “It does?”

  “Yep. But just so you know, no one else is allowed to do that to you. Your cheeks are only for me to kiss.” He eyed me sternly, yet playfully. “Your cheeks belong to me.”

  “And just so you know, your entire body belongs to me.” I told him sternly, yet playfully. “I’m telling you James, if I see another girl touch you like Donna has in the past, I will not be happy. In fact, I might get violent.”