by Amy Valenti
A pause, then Alex giggled. “Well, not literally. Though I guess you’d be in a better position to tell that than I am.”
I wasn’t, yet, but I decided to let her comment pass. “Thanks for talking to her, by the way.”
“Me?” Alex gave me an innocent look. “No idea what you’re talking about.”
“Of course you don’t.”
* * * *
Lena
“Sure this is the best way?” Smurfette retied one of the ribbons on my dress, frowning.
I gave myself one last look in the mirror. “It’s the only way besides just going off-scene and letting them get away with it. And you gave me the idea. You getting cold feet on my behalf?”
She sighed. “I don’t know if Mel will stand with you, or with Ben.”
“That’s her decision, I guess.” It was the only thing about the plan that I wasn’t crazy about, but if I thought about it now, I’d lose my nerve. “We’ll see.”
“You look great. Ready?”
I took a deep breath. “I think so.”
“Let’s rock.”
With a last glance at the list in my hand, I put on my Domme face and headed out toward the DJ booth. The DJ, Lita, faded out the current song when I caught her eye, and I took my place between her and Rose, watching the club’s collective attention slowly turn toward us.
At the back of the room, Gary was shaking his head at people trying to enter the play space, telling them it was off-limits for the moment. We had everyone gathered, and anyone who wasn’t there would hear about it from the ones who were.
Rose took a wireless microphone from Lita, her stiletto heels clacking as she stepped forward. “Hello, everyone. Thanks for being here tonight, and I’m sorry for the interruption to your evening. There’s an issue that’s come to my attention recently, and it’s serious enough that I need to make this club’s position clear. Lena?”
With a glance at Smurfette, who had retreated to stand near Josh, I took the mic Rose offered. “Thanks.”
Then, looking Ben straight in the eye, I began.
* * * *
Josh
I watched as Rose introduced Lena, not entirely sure how effective my girl’s approach would be. She didn’t seem too nervous, though I knew her well enough to know she must have been, at least a little.
Lena took the mic, and stepped forward. “Hi. For any newbies in here tonight, I’m Lena. I’m usually really friendly, so come say hi when this is finished. I’m just kinda pissed off this week.”
Alex and I exchanged amused glances.
“This isn’t karaoke night…but there is a certain song I gotta sing, if you don’t mind. Actually, it’s more of a poem. Or maybe more of a list.”
Her voice steely, she began to read out the names of everyone on Ben’s list of bettors. Ben and a couple of others at a nearby table turned their backs on her as she read their names, and without faltering, Lena marched over there, stepped up onto the couch they were sitting on, and then over onto their table.
Watching them look from her platform heels on upward, I felt a rush of pride. If she hadn’t had everyone’s attention before, she certainly did now. And she didn’t seem to give a damn if they could see up her dress.
Gonna have to talk to her about that, once she’s mine.
Finishing up the list of names, she surveyed the room with a scowl. “All these people placed bets on when I would give in and play a scene with a certain individual.”
Most eyes turned to me; the game Lena and I had been playing was common knowledge by that point. I kept mine on her, and she continued, “For those of you who might have forgotten, the most widely-accepted creed for the practice of BDSM is three words. Safe. Sane. Consensual.”
I caught her drift a moment before everyone around me did, and gave her a tiny smile and nod. Encouraged, she positioned her foot next to Ben’s drink. “Or we could go with RACK, which is ‘risk-aware consensual kink’. I could kick this into your lap right now, Ben, and I’d really like to…but I’m not gonna, because you haven’t consented.”
Ben snatched his drink off the table anyway, cradling it possessively, and Lena jumped down from his table, returning to her place beside Rose and Lita. “So, I’ll get to the point. Without obtaining our consent, or even telling us about it, these people bet—pretty much—on when I was gonna give it up. When the guy involved found out about it, he didn’t place a bet, because he actually has respect for women.”
She didn’t look at me, but the slight warming of her tone was all for me—I knew that.
“He also didn’t tell me about it, and neither did any of my friends. Wanna know why? Because they didn’t want me to be humiliated, and they hoped it would all blow over.”
She shrugged, pausing for effect. “I know what you’re thinking. Especially those of you who have seen me in a submissive role in clubs before, way back when. ‘Hey, what’s she talking about? I’ve seen her in the dungeon with her ass in the air—she loves humiliation.’”
A random guy gave a wolf whistle, and Lena glared in his general direction, trying to pinpoint the culprit. Alex moved away from my side, heading over to a boy barely out of his teens and pointing him out to Lena.
She took a few steps toward him, and he shrank back in his chair. I felt kinda sorry for him; she could be pretty menacing when she put her mind to it. “Wanna do that again?”
He shook his head emphatically, and Lena turned her back on him, continuing, “I did not ask to be objectified for anyone’s financial gain. I did not give my consent. This kind of humiliation has happened to me before and it stirs up bad memories. This isn’t something I’m getting off on, and I don’t feel safe to do kink at Rack and Ruin right now.”
Looking over at Rose, she added, “Thank you.”
Rose took the mic back from her. “Thanks for bringing this to my attention, Lena.”
Levelling a seasoned pro-Domme’s stare at Ben, then at the rest of the guiltily squirming patrons around the room, she snapped out, “As the owner of this club, it’s my prerogative to make the rules. Here’s a new one. Anyone who organises or places bets—regarding scenes or relationships that may or may not happen inside this club—will be barred for life.”
A murmur went through the crowd, but Rose silenced everyone with a frown.
“With regards to this incident, which took place before this precedent was established… Everyone named and shamed tonight is barred from Rack and Ruin for exactly one year. If you wish to come back here after that, I will allow it, but for now, you are no longer welcome, and you have fifteen minutes to say your goodbyes and leave.”
A couple of yards from me, Mel opened her mouth, then closed it again, defeated. Lena gazed at her with obvious regret, then turned away as Ben grabbed his girlfriend’s arm.
Lita started the music again, and most people turned away to talk to their friends about this latest development. I made my way over to Lena, who watched me approach with a tiny wave.
“Not bad.”
Her smile was genuine, but brief. “Thanks. I just wish Mel hadn’t been involved.”
I looked over to find Ben arguing with Rose, and Alex hugging Mel. “Go talk to her. She might not take it personally.”
She kissed my cheek, then headed into the fray. I kept back, my eye on Ben. Something told me he wouldn’t go quietly.
I was right. After Rose dismissed him, he marched over toward Lena, but I stepped into his path.
“You gotta keep a tighter leash on your damn sub,” he snarled at me.
I stared him down, letting him see a flash of my angry contempt before putting on a neutral face. “Get the feeling it’s only you and your gambling buddies that think so.”
He balled his fists, and part of me rejoiced. “You nearly cost me more than I was willing to lose,” I told him. “Just give me a reason to knock you out. Just one.”
Mel swept past me, shoving Ben with both hands. “Haven’t you fucked up enough? Leave Josh alone and g
et to the damn car, all right?”
The two of them faced off in a private battle between Dominant and submissive. Mel shook her head, and Ben threw up his hands, defeated. “Whatever. Let’s get the fuck out of here.”
While he stomped toward the exit, Lena and Alex joined us. “Mel?”
She looked at the three of us, teary-eyed. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. I’m his Domme, but there are certain things I could never control.”
“You’re not supposed to. It’s his life.” I squeezed her shoulder, and she nodded.
“I guess.”
Lena hugged her tightly. “Still wanna go shopping next week?”
Mel smiled weakly. “Absolutely. I’ll text you.”
We watched her go, her head held higher now. Lena sighed, and I put my hand on her shoulder. “You okay?”
“Will be once I have a drink.”
A little surprised, I asked, “You wanna stick around?”
“And leave right after Ben? I’m not gonna be run out of here so easily.”
She really is something.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Josh
Over the next four months, Lena and I grew closer. By unspoken agreement, we didn’t see each other outside the club, except on the occasions I drove her home. We kept our physical distance, although she took to hugging me hello and goodbye, and every now and then one of us would venture as far as a cheek kiss.
Mentally, though, it seemed as if we got closer every time we talked, sharing details of our lives that most people didn’t know. I couldn’t get her out of my mind, and looked forward to every club night with an enthusiasm that part of me found kind of pathetic.
We still provoked each other, testing the depths of our mutual attraction, and at times, all I wanted was to order her to her knees. Her resistance had crumbled somewhat, but since her moment of weakness in my car—when she’d asked me to kiss her—she’d rebuilt her walls a little. If I moved too soon, she’d only build them higher. Since I now knew why keeping her distance was so important to her, I was content to let it go on for a while. She needed her autonomy for now, and if she needed to carry on with our game to be comfortable with what she felt for me, I could live with it.
Even though sometimes my sexual frustration was overwhelming.
After the incident with Ben and his gambling buddies, the club’s patrons seemed to grow less interested in what happened between me and Lena. That was a relief—Lena was complicated enough on her own. I didn’t need the extra conflict.
She topped Tamara and Danny on occasion, and I continued to play with Alex, though only ever at the club. We dissected each other’s techniques, flirting whenever the chance came up, and she let me know a little something more about her preferences as a submissive by the end of every club night, dropping them like breadcrumbs for me to follow.
On one such night, I watched Lena dancing and pondered the wisdom of asking her to kneel for me. It was nearly eight months on from the date of our first meeting. All this time, I’d been waiting for her to act, but part of me wondered if she were just testing me, expecting me to take matters into my own hands and prove my dominance. I wouldn’t have put it past her.
Before I could decide one way or the other, Alex grabbed Lena’s arm, pulling her to a stop and yelling something into her ear.
Lena’s eyes widened, then her gaze flitted to me for the briefest of moments before she pivoted to look toward the club’s entryway. She smiled—genuinely, as far as I could tell—and ran toward a tall blond man who had just walked in, throwing her arms around him and then yelling something in his ear.
Watching her reunion with someone I’d never seen before, I became slowly aware of the gazes of some of the other patrons resting upon Lena, then upon me. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that this guy was an ex of hers—maybe even the guy Mel had mentioned, the one she’d submitted to in the past.
I didn’t know how Lena would react to the new development, but if she decided to submit to him, that would be her choice—no matter how much a certain part of me snarled possessively at the idea.
The guy asked Lena something, and she took his hand in reply, grabbing Alex’s at the same time. Dragging them both behind her, she led them to the dance floor, whirled into his arms for a brief moment, and then away again.
Tamara slipped into the seat Lena had vacated ten minutes earlier. “Don’t worry, Josh. You know she’s yours, in everything but name.”
I’d gotten to know Tamara pretty well over the past few months, and I shrugged, sipping my beer before replying. “I’m not gonna take that for granted. First thing I said to myself when I met her.”
Lena’s casual sub shook her head. “I’ll give you the context. That’s Matt. He’s been gone for around…three years, now? Close enough, anyway. Lena subbed to him for a good few months, and they stopped a little while before he left town. He was never her boyfriend, as far as commitment goes. Just a regular play partner with benefits.”
I’m not even that. I shook my head at her, appreciating the sentiment, but not wanting to seem too insecure about it. “You don’t have to tell me this. None of my business, after all.”
“Yeah, it is. I really want you guys to get together, and not because of some stupid betting pool. Because, duh…if there’s chemistry between any two people in this room, it’s you and Lena.” Tamara watched the dance floor as the current song ended, and Lena began to make her way back over towards us, Alex and her newly acquired friend in tow. “She’s just excited to see him. Nostalgia, you know?”
“I know.”
We didn’t have time to say anything else. People were getting up to welcome Lena’s ex-Dom back, and Lena herself took the opportunity to slip away before I could catch her eye. She was heading for the ladies’ room, and after Tamara had given Matt a brief hug hello, she excused herself. I guessed it was time for a girl talk, however those things worked.
If she told Lena I was jealous, Lena wouldn’t be the next one tanning her hide in the dungeon.
* * * *
Lena
I stared at my reflection in the mirror, conflicted. Of all the times for Matt to show up, it had to be now? I’d been thinking of giving in and kneeling for Josh…if not tonight, then at the next club night in two weeks. And then Matt had walked through the door and spoiled my plans.
Okay, it shouldn’t have mattered. The past was the past, and I was over Matt. Acting submissive around him was pretty instinctive, though. What if Josh notices? What if he backs off? What if I’ve missed my chance?
Tamara interrupted my train of thought, pushing through the door and leaning on the counter by the washbasins, her eyes sympathetic. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” I met her gaze in the mirror and sighed, knowing I wasn’t fooling her. “No.”
“It’s kind of a mess, huh?” Tamara leaned over to give me a brief hug, and I closed my eyes, drawing strength from her support before pulling back. “Josh is a little blindsided, but he’s cool. Says he’s gonna let you make your own decisions.”
I wondered how exactly she’d gotten that information. “What, did he make a public announcement?”
Tamara rolled her eyes. “No. I told him not to worry, and he said it was your call.”
That made me feel a little better, at least. “What do I do when I go out there, Tam? Where do I sit? Who do I talk to first? It’s like this horrible, messy minefield of protocol, and I don’t know what to do.”
“Go sit at Josh’s feet. Screw what Matt wants.”
I imagined doing just that, a tiny shiver of desire travelling down my spine. It would be a good solution, except… “What if Josh thinks I’m just doing it to prove a point to Matt? That wouldn’t be fair to him, not after all these months.”
Tamara shook her head, making a few minor adjustments to her hair, using the mirror for guidance. “It’s definitely a mess. But it’s nobody’s fault. How about you just go out there and have a drink? Sit with me and Danny, and just
take things as they come?”
“But then Josh might think I’m ignoring him, and Matt might ask me to play, and…” My brain felt scrambled, and I gave a wordless cry of frustration, giving up. “Fuck it. I’ll deal with it when it happens.”
Tamara laughed. “Good call. Ready to go back out there?”
I thought about it. Deep breath in, and then out… “Okay. Let’s go.”
We headed back out into the club, and I sensed more than one curious pairs of eyes on me as I approached our group. Josh caught my gaze as I sat down a couple of seats away from him, and I smiled at his obvious concern. Whatever he saw in my face, it was enough to reassure him, and he turned to listen to something Izzy was saying—not dismissing me, but letting me do my own thing. Thank you, Josh.
The atmosphere was fairly relaxed, but as a few people jumped up to dance, Matt scooted over to talk to me. “How’ve you been, Lena? Really?”
His focus used to make my head spin. It still did, a little, but I was older and wiser by this point in my life. “Pretty good. Finished my Masters, and I’m a computer programmer now.”
“Lost most of your accent, too.” Matt grinned. “I’m betting that Southern drawl still comes out to play every once in a while, though. If you go submissive enough.”
I scowled at him. “You think you can just walk back in here and try to pull that, after all this time? Things have changed.”
His attitude didn’t falter. “So I hear. But just because you’re playing hard to get with this guy, that doesn’t mean you can’t play a scene with me, just for old times’ sake, right?”
Memories flashed through my mind. Matt had always been really good at taking me in hand, and I doubted that had changed after all this time. We’d had some pretty amazing times together back in the day. Part of me was tempted by his offer—but what about Josh? I couldn’t do that to him, not after all this time…
