Heath took hold of one of my hands and brought me into his chest, his strong arms encircling me like a protective band.
“I’m going to miss you. I promise to call every chance I get.”
I nodded against his chest, afraid my voice might crack under the weight of emotions ravaging my system.
He titled my face up with a finger and I wanted to curse at the tear that gently rolled down my cheek.
“I’d stay if I could.”
Once again I nodded. No words could make it past the lump in my throat. The heart I’d worked so hard to protect cracked under the strain.
Heath pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. “I have to go.” His lips ghosted over my skin.
“I know,” I whispered.
Steeling myself, I took a step out of his embrace, back onto the curb behind me.
“Promise me you’ll call me if you need anything?”
“I will.”
I wasn’t sure that I would, but I knew it would make him feel better about leaving. And for some reason I couldn’t explain, I wanted to protect him as much as he was trying to protect me.
He stepped back around the driver’s side of the car to climb in. I couldn’t get my feet to move as I stood there in the cold, waiting for him to drive away. He waved as his car pulled away from the curb and drove out of sight. I wanted to sink to the ground and try to push all of the wonderful things he’d done for me over the last week out of my head. But I knew that was impossible.
Heath was the only man on my mind.
I had a feeling it would be that way for a while. I trudged back into the house, reminding myself that I was mourning a loss that hadn’t happened yet. Only time would tell if Heath would really stick around and I just had to wait it out.
Easier said than done.
I went straight for my bedroom and curled up on the bed, hugging my pillow to my chest. And only this once, I cried myself to sleep.
The sky was still alight when I cracked one eye open a few hours later. Heath had a point, I needed to find time to fit more sleep into my schedule. Even though I went to sleep upset, I felt more rested after the past week than I had in months.
A quick glance at the clock told me I had about an hour before I went into the club for the night. I still had to figure out what to tell Doug. I knew in about a month our uniform wouldn’t be able to hide my growing belly.
I went to the kitchen, the cabinets and fridge now full of healthy food options, and made myself a piece of chicken and side salad for lunch. The doctor had taken away all of my quick, cheap options, making me cook, but if it was for the good of the little peanut, I’d do it. I didn’t mind cooking, it was the cooking for one that sucked. Probably why I gave up on it for quick microwavable meals. At least I would get to practice my culinary skills again, even if it was a pipe dream.
By the time I made it to work, I realized I hadn’t checked my phone since that morning. The screen lit up with a message from Heath from hours ago.
Heath: I miss you already.
He must have sent it when he was at the airport. My fingers hovered over the keys as I went to type I miss you too. Something stopped me. I was letting myself get too involved. Too attached to someone who may not be there in the end. I shoved my phone into my back pocket and pushed the door of the club open. Instead of heading for the locker room, I went right for Doug’s office. I wanted to get this conversation over with before I chickened the hell out.
I rapped my knuckles on the door and turned the knob when I heard the muffled ‘come in’ from the other side. The door swung open and I was greeted by not only Doug’s smiling face but Marcus’s as well.
“Jenna, what can I do for you?” Doug gestured to the chair in front of his desk, next to Marcus.
I twisted my hands together, not prepared to face the two of them. Hell, Marcus was friends with one of the guys from the band.
“You guys are busy. I can come back later.”
Marcus stood and stepped around his chair walking over to where I stood. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and led me to his vacated chair. “You’re upset. Talk to us. What can we do to help?”
Most people didn’t imagine working in a club with outfits that left very little covered as a place where the owner and manager were kind, good-hearted men. I hadn’t either until I’d shown up for my interview. With the celebrities who walked through their door, they had to be careful about who they hired, but they also weren’t delusional enough to think we’d get decent tips in turtle necks and long skirts.
I glanced between the two men, trying to find my courage before I freaked out and ran. Just like I knew they would, their eyes were filled with nothing but kindness and desire to help.
I sucked in a deep breath and went for it. “I’m pregnant and I don’t want to lose my job.”
Marcus took the seat next to me. “We would never do that to you.”
Doug nodded in agreement. “We’ll find something for you to do that won’t have you carrying around heavytrays.”
I shook my head. “I can’t afford to lose the tips.”
Marcus patted me on the arm. “We’ll make it work. I just wanna know one thing, and you can tell me to shove it if it isn’t my business, but did you tell the father? ’Cause if you did and he’s refusing to help I’m gonna kick the fuck out of the little prick.”
“No,” I raced to defend Heath. “He knows and he’s more than willing to help. He actually spent the last week here convincing me to let him help.”
Doug was nobody’s fool. He quirked a brow at me. “So I can hazard a guess that you’re what brought Heath Marshall back to town.”
I felt the heat race up my cheeks. Heath said he didn’t want to hide it from anyone. It was me who requested that, but I knew the two men before me had no desire to run to the papers about this. No one wanted to bring the circus into town. The customers chose this place for its discretion.
Marcus turned to me. “Is Heath the father?”
“He is,” I said, keeping my eyes on the floor.
“Jenna, if he’s willing to help you, don’t push him away. You know Doug and I will do whatever we can to get you the hours you need, but I’ve known Reagan for eight years and I can tell you right now that he and his boyfriend, Sawyer, wouldn’t waste their time being friends with douchebags. If he said he’ll be there he will.”
I studied Marcus’s face for a moment. “Thank you.”
The corner of Doug’s mouth curved up. “Why don’t you go get ready for your shift? Marcus and I will figure out where to schedule you once you start to show.”
I glanced back and forth between the two men and stood. “Thank you.”
Doug tipped his head forward. “Anytime.”
I walked out of the office feeling lighter than when I’d walked in and I knew it had nothing to do with getting all that off my chest. And it had everything to do with what Marcus had said about Heath. Heath cared. In my heart I knew this. Now if only I could get my head to start listening, maybe I wouldn’t worry so much.
Maybe.
CHAPTER 21
Heath
One day. Only one day had passed. If only it hadn’t felt like a week. Things had been a whirlwind since my plane landed yesterday evening. I’d taken a cab right to the venue. The twinkling lights of the city reminded me of the time. Even though I wanted to check in with Jenna that first night, by the time we finished our run through of the set list, I was running on empty.
Driving to each stop on the tour made the time changes easier to adapt to. Not so much this time. I hadn’t even bothered catching up with the rest of the band. Instead dragging my ass back to my bus. I’d barely made it back to my room, passing out on my bed fully dressed.
My goal had been to call Jenna in the morning, except of course I woke up ass early when she would still be sleeping.
“Hey, man. Open up,” I heard, accompanied by a pounding on my door.
I set the steaming mug of coffee on the table
before going to unlock the door.
Sawyer’s shaggy head of brown hair could be seen from the window. I popped the lock and went back to the couch. “Come in.”
The door opened. “What’s up?” Sawyer said, coming up the stairs.
I lifted the mug. “Coffee. Jet lag is a bitch. What are you doing up so early?”
“I bet. I came to talk to you.” He walked over to the coffee maker and dropped in a pod to make one of his own.
I lifted a brow in his direction. “Make yourself at home.”
“Shut it, ass. Not like we don’t share a kitchen at home.”
The sound of liquid filling the mug hit my ears. “Touché.”
After rummaging through the fridge for creamer, he brought his cup over and dropped down onto the couch. “So you wanna tell me how things went? You raced out of practice without a word last night.”
I scoffed. “Racing was one thing I didn’t do last night. My ass was dragging. I almost didn’t make it through the set list.”
“I could tell.” He lifted the mug to his lips. “I forget what it’s like to suffer through the time difference.”
“The fucking worst. But it was worth it.”
“Yeah?”
My thoughts went right to Jenna. Her smile when I did something she liked but didn’t expect it or the way her brow furrowed when she’d get frustrated. Seeing my baby for the first time. “I got to see the baby.”
His mug stopped halfway to his lips. “You can see it already?”
I chuckled. “That’s what I thought. Just a small little spot on an ultrasound, but the heartbeat. Dude, there’s nothing like it.”
“Wanna explain to me why you don’t sound freaked out about this at all? You’re gonna be responsible for another human being and you sound as calm as someone who’s talking about the weather or what they ate for dinner the night before.”
“I’m freaked, but I didn’t want Jenna to know that this week, so I did my best to hide it. She’s already swearing that I won’t want to be involved in the baby’s life eventually.”
“She doesn’t know you very well. Once you commit to something you don’t give up.”
“That’s why I needed the week with her. You’re right, she didn’t know me, but I got the chance to change that a little bit.”
“What are you gonna do now? We don’t have any more breaks this long until the tour is over.”
The strong aroma of coffee filled my nose as I brought the cup to my lips to take a sip. “I know. But there are video calls and if we have a few days, I might fly back if she’s off.”
He studied me for a few minutes. It took so long, I started to get nervous. “Is she living up to the memory of her you couldn’t stop thinking about?”
“She is pretty amazing. Everything she’s done for herself on her own, I can’t help but admire her.”
“But…”
“But what?”
“But…there’s a but to that sentence. What’s wrong with her?”
I sat up and set my mug on the table. “That’s the thing, there’s nothing wrong with her. It’s not her that’s the problem, it’s my job.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Your job. What’s wrong with your job? You’ve worked your ass off to get where you are. We all have.”
“Nothing’s wrong with the job. I have a feeling she thinks she can’t live up to our life. I kept trying to explain to her, life wasn’t always like this for us.”
“Ain’t that the fucking truth.”
“I’m gonna use every minute between now and the end of the tour to prove to her I don’t see myself as the celebrity she sees me as. Hopefully, in time she’ll just see me as Heath.”
Sawyer shook his head. “I can’t imagine what it’s like. I actually don’t think I want to. Even though things weren’t always easy for Mari and me, I feel like it would be a hell of a lot harder if Reagan and Cole had been strangers through all of this.”
“Shit is definitely not easy. But for the first time I met a girl I have a shit-ton in common with and doesn’t want an ounce of my money. She’s working two jobs.”
“Damn.” Sawyer rubbed a hand down his face. “That much time on her feet can’t be good for her or the baby.”
“Probably not. I even offered to set up an account for her to use so she could quit one and she wasn’t having it. Actually got pretty pissed off at me for even suggesting it.”
Sawyer’s eyes widened. “Wow, she really doesn’t want your money.”
“Nope.”
“Well, we all know you can be a charming motherfucker when you want to be. So call and charm her.” He gestured to where my phone sat on the table.
“Time zones. Remember?”
“Shit. What time does she usually get up?”
I glanced at the time on my phone. “Probably in an hour or two, but she’ll be getting ready for work. She works at a diner during the day and the club at night.”
“Damn,” he breathed.
“Yeah. The first time I’ll be able to talk to her will be after the show tonight.”
“No going out for afterward?”
“Maybe, but only after I talk to her. I don’t want to give her the chance to think I’m giving up on her and the baby.”
“Good point.”
Sawyer groaned as he stood. “All right. Mari wants to head over early and rework the sound levels. She thinks her mic is too high and the one on Monty is too low.”
“Okay. I wanna grab something to eat and I’ll be ready to head over whenever. I wasn’t paying much attention last night.”
Sawyer walked to the door. He stopped and called over his shoulder. “Oh, and just to warn you, Mari wants to know everything about Jenna. Apparently she’s in matchmaker mode.”
I gave a fake shiver. “Damn, she’s scary when she gets like that.”
He smirked. “My guess is she sees it as payback for you setting things in motion with Cole.”
That had been a gamble. When Mari seemed to blow Cole off after weeks and weeks of sending flowers and showing up to see her sing, I thought maybe I’d give the guy a little help. At the time, I’d only known a little of what went on with them in the past. Luckily things had worked out so well for the two of them.
“Shit.”
“Except that’s not nearly as bad as Monty’s fit the other night.”
“What the hell is his problem?”
“He thinks you left him hanging with the song he wants to write.”
“Bullshit. It was his song, I was just helping out where he needed me.”
“Yeah, well, good luck explaining that to him.”
“He’ll just have to deal. I’ll admit, being on tour seems to be really screwing with him.”
Sawyer rubbed his hand on the back of his neck. “That’s an understatement. Honestly, I’m starting to worry what kind of trouble he’s going to get in while we’re on the road.”
“We just keep an extra eye on him.”
“That’s what Reagan said.”
I sighed and leaned back against the couch. “Your man is a smart guy. We’ll find a way to keep Monty out of trouble even if we have to lock his ass on his bus.”
Sawyer chuckled. “Might not be a bad idea. And now I’m going to spend some quality time with my man before we head over.”
Sawyer shut the door behind him and I dropped my head onto the back of the couch. I wanted to check in with Jenna and see how she was feeling. Since that wasn’t possible, I thought about heading to Monty’s bus to figure out what the hell was up with him. Monty had always been the wild one, but the last month or so things seemed to be getting out of hand.
Whether it was the attention or boredom, we’d have to get him to chill the fuck out. Then I looked at the clock and realized Monty would be sound asleep. No reason to wake cranky. I’d talk to him before we went on stage.
I finished my coffee, my phone taunting me with its silence. Although I knew Jenna wouldn’t be the first one to make a phone
call once I left, I still hoped she might. She’d be afraid she was bothering me if she called. I’d find a way to make her understand that she was never a bother to me.
In the end I spent most of the day in my trailer, hoping I might hear from her when she got off work at the diner. She was off from the club for the night. Two hours had passed. I knew I wouldn’t be hearing from her before we went on stage and forced myself up and into the shower.
The moment I stepped off the bus, I found Mari leaning against the side, waiting. “Hey, stranger.”
I arched a brow. “Mari, what are you up to?”
She rested her hand against her chest. “Me?”
“Yes, you. It’s written all over your face.”
I started walking to the venue, knowing she would follow. A second later, she linked her arm through mine. “I want to know how everything went.”
“I have to say, I wanna know too.” I peeked over my shoulder to see Jackson coming up behind us.
We stopped and waited for him to catch up. “Things went really well. Better than I expected.”
“And you’re not freaking out?” Jackson asked.
“Fuck yes, I’m freaked. I didn’t expect to be a dad yet, but that doesn’t mean I’m not gonna embrace it either.”
Mari squeezed my arm. “We wouldn’t expect any less. Now the question is, when do we get to meet her?”
I shook my head. “Time will tell. Right now, I need to get her to trust in me that I won’t leave.”
Mari frowned. “She doesn’t trust you?”
I sighed. “It’s not so much me she doesn’t trust. It’s the world. Everyone she’s ever know has left her in some way. Her parents died when she was young, her best friend moved away for college and never came back, and now her grandmother died. That’s a lot of shit to pile on one person.”
“Yeah, but besides the best friend, you’ve had the same shit dumped on your plate,” Jackson argued.
“But, I have you guys. You are my family.”
Cover Me (Jaded Ivory Book 3) Page 16
