Second Thoughts

by Jade Winters

  Melissa chuckled. “I’m only picking up some menus. I’ll be in and out in minutes. Besides, I’m not planning on drinking that much tonight.”

  She would have liked nothing more than to totally forbid Melissa seeing Faye again but she knew that would only backfire. Melissa was like a loyal dog to those she valued. Bettina hoped that once the baby arrived their friendship would gradually fade to nothing and Melissa would start mixing with some more level-headed people. She pulled a face. “Like I haven’t heard that one a million times before.”

  Melissa inclined her head. “Maybe I should have had a hen night like the one you had. A nice meal with friends and a clear head the next day.”

  Bettina nodded. “I’m not going to say I told you so, but you were the one who let Faye talk you into all of this.”

  “Well you knew what the alternative was.”

  “It doesn’t matter, because I would never have allowed it.”

  “I think Faye knew that, otherwise she would have enticed Eli into booking a package deal weeks ago.” Melissa grabbed her bag off the sofa and peeked inside.

  Bettina’s phone rang. Picking it up, she groaned when she recognised the caller. “It’s the DJ. How much do you want to bet he’s cancelling us?”

  “He might not be.”

  Bettina answered the phone, within seconds their conversation was over and she disconnected the call. “Just like I said. Cancelled. Some bullshit about his wife having to go abroad to see a sick relative. I bet he got a better gig. Now I’m going to have to spend the whole evening trying to replace him.”

  “Not everyone lies, Bettina. He might be telling the truth.”

  She dismissed Melissa’s comment with the wave of her hand. “I beg to differ.” She should have known better than to think she could have relied on the cocky prick who thought he was the best thing since sliced bread. When she’d seen his spiky hair and sleeved tattoos she should have sent him packing there and then, but he talked a good talk and she had been taken in by him. Next time she was going to trust her instincts. In her role as a head hunter, her gut instinct on first impressions was worth its weight in gold. She couldn’t help but use the same tool to judge everyone she came into contact with.

  Melissa shrugged. “I’d better go; I don’t want to be late for my own party. I’ll see you later.” She blew her a kiss and headed out, leaving a trail of sweet perfume behind.

  Bettina’s eyes followed her as she disappeared behind the door. She gave a slight shake of her head and smiled at the thought of the woman she had fallen in love with the second she’d laid eyes on her. The path towards a romantic relationship with Melissa had been a difficult one to navigate. Of course, Bettina hadn’t expected it to be easy. The hard blows life had dealt the young woman in such a short space of time would be trying enough for the toughest of people let alone a twenty-one year old. She had taken in a lost child and watched proudly as she grew into the woman she was today.

  That Melissa had embraced her idea about having a baby together gave her hope that the past was well and truly under the bridge and they could now move on to the next phase of their lives.

  At thirty-eight, Bettina was at an age when many people considered her too old to be getting married and starting a family. To her it was all bah humbug. What was the point of settling down before you met the right person? Had she stayed with her ex-partner all those years ago, she would have missed out on meeting Melissa and that in itself would have been a tragedy.

  She poured herself a large glass of wine and slouched back against the sofa, a wry smile on her face. Sometimes you had to take fate into your own hands – that was the only way to get what you wanted. Bettina knew that from first-hand experience, because that’s exactly what she had done all those years ago.

  Chapter Seven

  By early evening, the venue Eli had chosen for the hen do was alive and kicking with loud music from the eighties and high-pitched female chatter.

  “Down the hatch!” Faye shouted out, encouraging the group of women crowded around a large table to down the shots they held in their hands.

  “Down the hatch,” the women called back, raising their small glasses in the air before knocking them back.

  Melissa gritted her teeth as the liquid slid down her throat and warmed her chest. She didn’t know why she drank shots, even when she knew they made her sick. But she couldn’t sit there drinking Coke all night. Faye would never let her live it down. She put the glass down before standing. “Hey, you guys,” she said, addressing the twenty friends from secondary school and university Faye had managed to gather for the party. “Thank you so much for coming tonight. I really am grateful you made the effort. It’s great to see you all again.”

  It was weird that only four years ago, she had seen most of the women on a daily basis. Though they’d all made promises to stay in touch with monthly gatherings, nothing ever materialised. The group had drifted apart and moved on with their lives. But she was happy that they had all made the effort for a day that meant so much to her.

  Justine laughed. “Let’s see if you’re still thanking us by the end of the night.”

  “I’m getting a little worried now.” Melissa cast her eyes around the table with a nervous smile. Though the party had been arranged by Eli and Faye, she still felt some apprehension. She knew Eli was a soft touch and Faye could talk her into anything.

  “Drink up,” Maddie, a petite blonde, shouted beside her. “You can tell Bettina your naughty antics were all down to the drink.”

  The women roared with drunken laughter.

  Melissa picked up another shot and downed it. As the liquid burned the back of her throat, she dropped back into her seat and inwardly groaned as she caught sight of a waitress in a black tuxedo with slick black hair, filling up their tray with more drinks at the bar.

  “You having a good time?” Eli slurred in the seat beside her.

  They’d only been there an hour and already Eli looked worse for wear. She scanned the table for a jug of water and poured a glass for Eli. “Yes, brilliant. Thank you so much for helping to organise all of this.”

  “It’s my pleasure. Anything for my little sister.” She gave her a brief hug, her eyes brimming with tears. “Mum and Dad would have been so proud of the woman you are, Melissa.” She paused. “Just as much as me.”

  “Thank you. That means a lot to me.”

  Eli dabbed at her eyes and gratefully picked up the glass of water Melissa had put on the table in front of her. Eli always looked uncomfortable showing any kind of emotion. It was only after she’d had a few drinks that she dared to reveal her softer more vulnerable side. Melissa had never quite managed to figure out why Eli could be so stern in some instances.

  “I’m sorry about all this,” Eli snivelled, the tip of her nose a pale shade of pink.

  “Don’t be silly, it’s fine.”

  “You’re a good sister Melissa, I only wish…”

  “There’s no point in wishing things were different, Eli. The most important thing is that we’ve made up for lost time now.”

  Eli smiled with gratitude and took a sip of her drink, seemingly pulling herself together as she fussed with her hair.

  “I just want you to be happy, Melissa. And to have a fantastic life.”

  “I am and I will.”

  The waitress arrived and laid the tray on the table. All hands rushed for the drinks. In a matter of seconds, the tray was empty.

  Melissa reached down to her bag beside her. “I’m really sorry to do this, but I’ve got to make a quick call. Will you be alright for a minute?”

  Eli nodded. Melissa hoped she wouldn’t have consumed any more drinks by the time she got back; the last thing she needed to hear again was how awful Eli felt about not being a “real” sister to her when they were growing up. Every time Eli brought it up, Melissa had tried to reassure her that she was happy they had managed to bond over the past few years. But as tonight had shown, she still wasn’t getting throug
h to her.

  Edging her way past her friends, Melissa wandered around until she found a quiet spot, giggling to herself as she heard another roar of laughter emerge from the group at her table. She fished out her phone from her bag and dialled Bettina’s number. Bettina answered after one ring. “Hey, how’s it going?”

  “We’re having great fun, but I wish you were here.”

  “As much as I love you, I’m glad I’m not.”

  Melissa laughed for a moment. “Have you had any luck with the wedding music?”

  “Yes. Funnily enough I just got off the phone with someone. He’s got a really good reputation. He did a gig for one of my clients.”

  “Okay, that’s a relief to hear.”

  “Thanks, Melissa.”

  “For what?”

  “Being thoughtful.”

  Melissa looked up to the ceiling. “This really is it, isn’t it?”

  Bettina’s voice was soft. “Yes, baby. This is us forever.”

  “Promise?”

  “On my life.”

  A loud cheer erupted behind her. “Bettina, I’d better get back. Love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  Snapping the phone shut, Melissa headed back to the table. From a short distance away she could see someone had moved into her seat next to Eli. She didn’t immediately recognise the mane of dark, tousled hair that cascaded past the woman’s slender shoulders. She frowned, wondering who the late arrival was. As she moved closer, her step faltered as the woman gave her hair a lofty toss – a familiar move Melissa would know anywhere.

  It can’t be. An involuntary throb of sorrow pulsed through her body at an unimaginable speed as unwanted memories flooded her mind – Four years. Four years of not feeling the softness of her skin. Nor hearing the sweet sound of her laughter. The amazing sex. The good times.

  She could barely catch her breath as she stared open-mouthed at the woman who had once broken her heart.

  Chapter Eight

  The moment of truth had arrived. After all the anticipation and self-talk to bolster her confidence, when Sara actually walked into the bar, Melissa was nowhere to be seen. It wasn’t until she’d greeted her old friends and sat next to Eli that she found out Melissa had gone to make a call. At least that gave her time to prepare herself.

  Eli shifted in her seat so she was sitting right up against Sara. “So you’ve come here all the way from the US?” She eyed her closely.

  “Yes, it’s been a bit of a rush. I only saw Faye’s email yesterday and managed to catch a last minute flight. I literally got to the hotel and had about ten minutes to get ready.”

  Eli gave her a lopsided grin. “Well I’m sure Melissa will be pleased you made the effort. You haven’t met her partner have you?”

  Sara shook her head. “I don’t think so.” Neither did she want to meet the woman who had stolen Melissa’s heart. She wasn’t that much of a sadist.

  “Ah if you do, you’ll like her. Bettina’s a lovely woman.”

  Sara smiled. Bettina? The name didn’t sound familiar. “Oh that’s good.”

  She sat quietly as Eli rambled on about Bettina’s achievements as a head-hunter for a prestigious recruitment agency. She spoke as if she were Bettina’s mother, proud for having such a high achieving daughter. Sara’s attention drifted in and out of the conversation only becoming fully alert when Eli’s jaw stopped moving and her eyes looked beyond her. Instinctively Sara knew Melissa was close by.

  What should she do? Say? She turned and immediately time seemed to fall away. Melissa hadn’t changed a bit, if anything, she looked even hotter. As she neared, Sara’s eyes drank in the sensuality of her body, electricity fizzled through her veins. How could I have ever let her go? She damned her stupidity for ever thinking a career could even come close to fulfilling her like Melissa’s love had.

  “Ahh here comes the beautiful bride to be?” She heard Eli saying as if from afar, to which she could only nod mutely.

  She willed herself to stand, but her legs wouldn’t respond. She wasn’t ready. Not yet. Not like this in front of so many people. Instead she stared wordlessly up at her. Melissa looked radiant. Happy. Content. Sexy. All the things Sara thought she would be lacking. Her ego had fooled her into thinking that nobody could make Melissa happy except for her. But looking at her now, she couldn’t have been more wrong. Sara’s confidence and belief that she could win her back quickly seeped away.

  Suddenly she was able to identify the nagging feeling that had been with her since she decided to return to the UK. It was her instinct telling her to let sleeping dogs lie.

  She should have turned down Faye’s invitation. No one would have blamed her. After all, travelling five thousand miles to attend a party was no mean feat for anyone. But no, she hadn’t been able to resist. Not her. Not Sara Miller, the woman who possessed a gene that caused her to jump without thinking.

  As Melissa reached the foot of the table and stood looking at her, Sara took a deep breath and pushed herself to her feet.

  Chapter Nine

  As if aided by an invisible force, Melissa lifted her shoulders and held her head high. She was grateful the raucous women were more concerned with the drinks they were guzzling, than the interaction between her and Sara. Just the mere sight of the woman was enough to make her heart stop beating. Sara, the shamelessly striking brunette with eyes that could melt glaciers in seconds, was only a few feet away. Melissa’s heart made a betraying leap as she took in the red bodice that clung to Sara’s well-toned body.

  “Look who made it? All the way from the US of A,” Eli called out, waving in an exaggerated fashion towards Sara.

  Melissa smiled, willing her racing pulse to slow. Deep breath in, slow breath out.

  The nervous flutter in her stomach quickened as Sara edged her way to the head of the table, coming to stand in front of her, a broad grin on her face.

  “Hey, Missy. It’s good to see you.”

  Though Sara’s features were delicately structured, there was a strength in the penetrating razor blue eyes that bore into her own. Completely enthralled, she had difficulty diverting her gaze. “It’s good to see you too, Sara,” she said with as much composure she could muster.

  “Missy, about your parents, I…” she started.

  Melissa raised her hand. “Please, don’t. I’d rather not talk about it. It’s okay, really.”

  “Okay, but I’m sorry.” Her voice sounded strained.

  The two women stood staring at one another. Melissa was too afraid to look away in case Sara vanished into thin air, that her eyes had cruelly played tricks on her.

  “So congratulations are in order,” Sara said, swiftly changing the subject. She jerked her head towards the flashing learner plate stuck to Melissa’s chest. Her voice smooth and sure, not a hint of the emotion that was there only seconds ago.

  Feeling heat rise to her cheeks, Melissa’s hand unconsciously moved to cover it. Suddenly she felt stupid for wearing it, as if she were a child caught trying on her mother’s clothes. “Hmm.” Melissa twisted the engagement ring on her finger. She was at a loss what to say to the woman she had once thought would be her partner for life.

  Sara glanced around the room. “So where’s the lucky lady?”

  “She isn’t here.”

  In characteristic fashion, Sara jauntily cocked her head to one side and glanced at her with a challenging lift of her eyebrows. Melissa knew that look so well.

  “We decided to have separate hen dos. She had hers last week,” Melissa heard herself explain a little too quickly.

  “Well it’s good to see you again. Even if it is under these circumstances.”

  Now it was Melissa’s turn to mirror Sara’s facial expression. She was truly perplexed by her statement. Sara had said it as if she were at a funeral or attending a wake at the end of a life, not the beginning of one.

  Before she had a chance to challenge her, Faye appeared from behind her, swaying slightly in high-heeled boots.


  “Sara, you made it. I didn’t think you’d come.” She grabbed her in a bear hug and lifted her off her feet, swinging her around in a circle.

  “How could I refuse?”

  Faye grinned until she saw Melissa glaring at her.

  “You knew Sara was coming?”

  “Yeah.” Faye smiled sheepishly. “Well, I’ll let you two catch up for a bit. Speak to you in a bit, Sara.” She winked at Melissa and headed for the bar.

  Both women watched her go before turning back to face one another.

  Now what? Make small talk about the weather? Ask her about her love life? No, she didn’t think she was strong enough to hear Sara talking about another woman, another love.

  “So you’re still in America then?”

  “Yep. Still there. And what about you? What have you been up to all these years?”

  Melissa could feel her face heating under Sara’s intense gaze. “I own a little coffee shop called Has Bean. It’s nothing fancy or anything.”

  “I see you haven’t lost your modesty then,” Sara joked. “So tell me, how long have you and Bettina been together?”

  Melissa crossed her arms over her chest, feeling a rush of embarrassment. Suddenly her courtship with Bettina seemed very short. “Six months.”

  “And you’re getting married already?” Sara blew out a breath. “What’s the rush?”

  “No rush. When you’ve met the one, what’s the point in waiting?” It was an automatic response. Wasn’t this what she had heard Bettina telling friends and family when they asked the same question?

  Sara moistened her lips as her eyes moved slowly across Melissa’s face. “And she’s definitely the one, is she?”

  She found herself struggling to say the words. Come on Melissa get your act together. Don’t let her affect you. Think of Bettina, your future. “Most definitely.” She felt her defences crumbling. Sara’s sudden appearance was causing a host of unexpected emotions inside her.

  “She must be something.”