Marriage Ever After
Page 8
“Why do you think it’s important for you to do that, Kash?”
Kash ran a hand through his hair.
“Because, I’ve harbored too much in me when it comes to him. He won’t ever change. I’m thirty-two years old and I’m still worried about what he thinks on certain things. I wanted him to accept my family but now, I realize I don’t need him. I don’t need his approval anymore. If I don’t stop now, it’ll be too late soon.”
“Why?”
“If I don’t stop now, I’ll turn into him. I’ll become someone I hate myself. Someone who does things out of anger, frustration and because he feels he’s entitled to. There are certain things that I’ve done that I will never regret like teaching that bastard a lesson that thought he could take advantage of my wife in a state that she herself didn’t ask to be in. There will always be a dark side of me that I will never wish away but I want to do better for my family. I want Mila to be happy.”
Dr. Harrison nodded as she jotted a couple of notes down then she had that hard look on her face. I knew she was going to ask a very probing question.
“I’m glad you want Mila to be happy. I approve of that as well but tell me, Kash, do you want YOU to be happy? What about Kash Emerson, what about him?”
Kash just stared at Dr. Harrison. Was Kash not happy? What wasn’t he happy about? I would do everything in my power to give it to him and make him happy.
After a minute of silence, Kash blinked.
“I am happy.”
Dr. Harrison kept that eye contact with Kash.
“Are you?” She questioned.
Kash clenched his jaw.
“I said I was, didn’t I?”
Dr. Harrison nodded.
“Now, I’m not trying to upset you, Kash. I’m just asking what about you? You worry about those around you, Mila included but what about you?”
Kash narrowed his eyes at her,
“I don’t get it. Mila gives a fuck about me and so does my uncle. They worry about me; a lot more than I care to want them to.”
Dr. Harrison sighed. She placed her notepad down on her side table, took her glasses off and got real with Kash.
“I know they do , Kash. I don’t doubt that not one bit but I’m not asking you about them. I’m asking you about you. Do you worry about yourself ?”
Kash slipped his hand out of mine as he ran both hands over his face as he leaned down a bit placing his elbows on his upper thighs.
“I don’t know, Dr. Harrison. I don’t know if I’ve ever worried about myself before. I’ve been my own mother and father for as long as I could remember. I made sure that what I did for me, I did it to not gone insane.”
“One more question for you, if you’ll allow it.” Dr. Harrison asked Kash.
“Yeah, might as well, just gut me now, doc.”
She gave Kash an actual smile this time instead of the smirk from before.
“Have you ever just stopped and thought about how you truly feel deep down inside? How the younger Kash felt when he couldn’t truly be a kid then he worked so hard. So, so hard to achieve high scores in all his subjects in school, win every medal when it came to swimming, then go off to Law school, graduate at the top of his class and then open up his own law firm with no doubts. Then not only that, in the five years, his law firm thrived, and he was known as a cutthroat defence lawyer. Where are your medals, awards, degrees and recognition for all that you’ve achieved, Kash?”
Kash covered his face in his hands,
“in our storage room.”
“I know I said one more question but hey, hardball right?” Dr. Harrison chuckled. “Why are you not showing them off, Kash? Why can’t you be proud of yourself?”
“Because my father never wanted to see them. I’ve gotten used to them, why should I show them now? What’s the point?”
My heart broke for Kash. It really did. For someone who grew up with a father like that, Kash had a really big heart, bigger than mine ever could be.
Dr. Harrison turned her attention me on,
“Mila, would you like to see all that Kash has ever achieved in his life? Are you proud of him?”
I smiled widely, nodding.
“Yes, I would love to see everything. I’m not just proud of him, I admire him. I look up to him sometimes. His brain, his mind is something extraordinary. I envy his photographic memory, his ability to work all night on a case and show up to court with confidence that he’ll win no matter what. He’s been like this since High school, back when he didn’t know or realize that after the first time, he tried to speak to me, I watched him after. His projects, his papers, when he presented and when he gave that speech as the class valedictorian. I knew he would do something great with his life and I’m so lucky that I get to be with him to witness him being him.”
Dr. Harrison smiled; her face full of admiration. She turned to Kash who still had his face in his hands,
“the point, Kash. Would be that the people who love you would love to show you off. They are proud of you and that will never go away. Those who matter will never abandon you.”
Chapter Nine
Mila
After our therapy session, I saw Kash in a whole new light. Not that I’ve never worried about him at times, but he never breached the subject of his father or how he grew up. He kept a lot of things that connected to his dad, quiet and hidden saying he didn’t want his father to taint what we had. I wanted Kash to know that I wouldn’t be going anywhere. I would be here for him no matter what because that’s what he deserved.
When we got home, Jordan spotted us and ran towards her father first and for the first time, in a long time, I was grateful she did. Now, I saw why he was so adamant on having more kids. My baby just wanted someone to love him and never abandon him. He wanted to replicate the love that Jordan gave him over and over again because he knew his children would love him for forever as long as he was a great father. Kash stood with Jordan in his arms and looked at me,
“you’re looking at me weird, stop it.” He rolled his eyes at me.
I snickered.
“How am I looking at you, Kash?”
“Like I’m going to break. Cut it out, bunny. I’ll to the list.” He watched me for my reaction because I knew what he was talking about.
I felt as my entire body came alive.
“Stop, Kash.”
He smirked.
“That’s what I thought.”
This time, I rolled my eyes as I paid attention to my daughter.
“Hi, baby. Not gonna give your mommy some love?”
Jordan smiled as she stuck her lips out waiting for a kiss. I gave her a quick peek knowing she did that because she wanted the lipstick on my lips.
“I missed you, mommy.”
I stretched my hands out for her to come to me.
“Aww, baby. Come here. You hungry? Did Cherise give you your snacks already?” Jordan came into my arms nodding.
Cherise came in view.
“Hi guys, yes I did. She’s getting stronger and bigger, right Miss Jordy?”
Jordan smiled.
“Yep. Gonna be tall, tall, tall like daddy, right mama?”
Both I and Kash laughed. Kash kissed the side of her head,
“Princess, I’ll make sure to sign you up for the basketball team.”
Jordan made a face that resembled Kash’s get the fuck out of here look.
“Basetball? I don’t wanna play no boy sport.”
Kash fake gasped.
“Miss Emerson! What do you mean basketball is a boy sport? It’s for girls too.” He teased her.
Jordan was not convinced.
“Nu-uhn,” she shook her head hard slapping me in the face with her pigtails. “No, it’s not. Miss Rew said that.”
Kash narrowed his eyes at Jordan.
“Me and Miss Drew need to have a talk but first, what do you want to be, Miss Emerson?”
Jordan scrunched up her nose then tapped her finger on her chin. She took
the biggest breath and yelled out her answer.
“I wanna be a crimiminal lawyer like daddy!”
I tried so hard not to laugh as Kash whoo-hooed then pretended to be seriously getting all up in Jordan’s face.
“Well, Miss Emerson, if you want to be a criminal lawyer, you have to know how to say it first.”
Jordan gave her father her angry face.
“Nu-uhn…”
“Uh-huh.”
“Nu-uhn, daddy.”
“Uh-huh, little girl.”
Jordan pouted.
“I’m not a little girl, daddy, I’m a big girl.”
Kash couldn’t help but smile.
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah!” Jordan yelled out.
Kash narrowed his eyes,
“you think you can beat me at dancing now that you’re a big girl?”
“Duh, daddy.”
Kash chuckled as he kissed her forehead and took her out of my arms setting her down.
“Well then big girl, I’ll race you to the game room! Last one…”
Before he could finish his sentence, Jordan zoomed out of the hall yelling.
“smells like poo poo!”
I side-eyed Kash,
“Really, babe?”
He kissed me quickly and ran after Jordan.
“I’m catching up to you, big girl!”
All you could hear was Jordan’s little laughter as Kash caught up to her. By the way, she was laughing, he was tickling her. I looked at Cherise,
“how are you? I feel like I haven’t had time to catch up with you as of late.”
She smiled at me as she put her blonde hair behind her ears.
“I’m great,” she replied but then a sad look took over. “I was really worried about you, Mils. If ever you need me, it doesn’t matter whether it’s night or day, I’ll be here. Even if it’s just someone you need to sit with you, quietly. I want you to know that I don’t just care for Jordan, I care about you and Kash too. He’s like my big brother too and you’re my sister.”
“Aww, Cherry bomb,” I nickname I haven’t called her in ages made both of us laugh. I pulled her into a hug. “Thank you for that. I love you.”
“I love you too, Milly Mils.”
Kash
After dinner, Mila went to go get Jordan ready for bed while I went to my office to work on some cases. I took a deep breath as I fired up my Mac. When it loaded up, I checked my email, it was odd that I was communicating with my father via email when I could’ve shown up at the house that I grew up in, but I didn’t want to be there ever again. He had emailed me back when I requested to meet him at his office or his chambers, whatever.
His answer.
As you wish.
Rick.
I rolled my eyes at his message and closed the window down as I pulled up to catch up to whatever work I hadn’t been able to.
My text notifications dinged. I pulled my phone from my sweats and couldn’t help but smile.
Bunny:
You know that I’ve entered the second trimester already…right? I want to punished.
Me:
Bunny, I know that information but why do you think I’d do it when you want it?
Bunny:
Don’t deny me, baby. I miss you.
Me:
Tell me, what about me you miss, bunny?
Bunny:
I miss the way your dick feels when it slides in and out of me. I miss you fucking me bare where I feel every part of you and what I miss the most is the look you give me when you’re about to cum.
Damn. I loved how nasty she got sometimes.
Me:
I’m busy, woman.
Bunny:
Too busy for you to eat me out.
I closed my Mac up really quick forgetting about everything else as I made my way into our bedroom. Mila knew me very well. One thing about me was that I loved eating pussy and I had no shame saying it over and over again. She knew she had me with that, but I still wasn’t punishing her tonight in our room… It didn’t mean that she wouldn’t be getting a different type of punishment though.
****
When I got into the room, Mila was getting out of the shower with her tiny ass towel wrapped around her beautiful naked body. The low music playing made me smirk.
“Nice choice in music,” it was Morning by Teyana Taylor and Kehlani.
“I’m glad you like my music, baby.”
Mila smiled at me as she dropped the towel and stood there letting me admire her body. I eyed her from head to toe, I didn’t notice before, but I did now, she was showing. It wasn’t that noticeable in her clothes but now, that she was naked, that was a different story. I beckoned her to me, and she walked over to me with the confidence she was born to take by the horns. When Mila stopped in front of me, I slipped a finger under her chin making her look up at me.
“You’re showing more now baby and I don’t think I’ve ever found you as attractive as I do now.” I leaned in biting her the tip of her chin. “I want to punish you so bad, but I also want to make you wait.”
Mila cocked a brow.
“I’m sure there’s something that can be done in the meantime, meet me in the middle, baby?”
“You’ll be the death of me, bunny.”
“But you’ll die happily.”
I snickered.
“Only if I drown in your juices then I’ll die happily. Now, get in position, bunny.”
I watched as Mila’s eyes sparkled with excitement as she got on her knees looking up at me the whole time. I moved over to the bed, sitting down and she put her wet, curly hair up in a messy bun then she crawled over to me like the sexy lioness she was. When she was right in front of me, she sat up on her knees as she began pulling my sweats and boxers down. I gave her assistance by sitting up for a second, then when she achieved what she needed, my dick bobbed right in her face; Mila licked her lips as she began stroking me. I tried not to move as she licked the tip. I bit my bottom lip as Mila got nastier with her movements as she began to take me deeper, my hand grabbed her messy bun and throat as I began fucking her mouth. The gagging, spit escaping her mouth and the way Mila looked up at me as if this was all she wanted, pushed me close to edge but this was part of her punishment as I pulled my dick out of her mouth.
“Oh darling, you know it’s a privilege and such a loving thing for me to cum in your mouth. You don’t deserve this, bunny.”
Mila pouted.
“But, Kash. I love the way you taste. I want to feel it all over me. Please, baby, let me make you cum.”
Her hands began stroking my dick and for a second, I forgot what exactly I was trying to punish her for.
“No, bunny. Let go of my dick and stand, darling.”
Mila slowly let go of my dick, sneaking in one final kiss to the tip as she stood. I sat back on the bed as she climbed over me climbing over my body until she was sitting on my face. The moment her pussy hovered over my lips; I buried my entire being in her. I licked, sucked, teased and fucked her with my tongue. Mila rode my face and her wetness dripped down my chin, I didn’t give a fuck. The messier, the better, and the fucking wetter. I smacked her ass, once and then I landed another one. I missed this, I missed eating her pussy, my favorite delicacy and dessert.
“Oh, Kash, baby…Your tongue is magical. Oh, missed this… Why did I ever?”
There she was. Mila was a talker during anything sexual unless she had my dick in her mouth. Not even a minute into her talking, her body began shaking and I knew she was going to come. Being a swimmer paid off in times like this, breathing was irrelevant just as long as my wife felt the bliss she was supposed to be feeling. I licked off as much as I could then I tapped her ass so she could move. Other times, I would’ve flipped us, but she was pregnant, no way would I do anything to put her at risk, the second trimester or not.
Mila tried to move off me,
“No, bunny, you’re going the wrong way. Down.”
She cracke
d a satiated smile as she slid down my body while I sat up. I cocked a brow knowing I didn’t have to tell her what to do next as she straddled me placing her hands on my chest for support. Mila didn’t say anything as she slowly slid down on my dick, squeezing the fuck out of me with her pussy walls. I groaned placing my hands on her hips for support. I threw my head back, I missed this, and I knew my dick couldn’t take this. I let her show me how much she wanted me even though I craved to take her harder than this. I smacked her ass.
“You better stop acting like you’re scared to ride my dick. Do it right, baby. Be my little slut. Show me why I fell for you in the first place. Fucking take this dick cause it’s yours, Mila.”
I knew what motivated Mila when it came to sex, so this was going to be a push for her. She leaned in kissing me while she bounced up and down on my dick, her walls gripping around me tighter than anything else. Fuck me. I can’t handle this.
I wrapped an arm around her waist as I flipped us with her back landing softly on the bed.
“You couldn’t resist, huh Kash?” Mila teased.
I chuckled.
“No, “ I answered as I slid all the way back in with a force I was sure pushed Mila up the bed. “Fuck, don’t ever fucking do this to me again, bunny. Don’t you ever keep me from my pussy again!I’m not playing with you.”
Mila shuddered as I leaned in, bruising her lips so that she could feel all the pain that she craved. I fucked her like how I felt, angry at the bullshit that we went through these months. I pulled my lips away from her lips as I sucked on my favorite spot on her neck. She moaned as her fingernails dug deep into the flesh on my back. Both my hands grabbed her legs that were wrapped around me, unhooking them from my waist and pushing them even further apart. I wanted full access to my pussy, to what belonged to me.
I sat up on my knees, pushing her knees up some more so I could watch in pure fascination as my dick slid in and out of her.
“Play with your clit for me, sweetness. I don’t want her to miss out on this.”
Mila moaned as she slid her hand down to her pussy, playing with her clit while I fucked her. Our bed was moving at the force of my thrust and I couldn’t help the smile on my face as I watched her, watching me. My strokes changed not in strength but in speed, I began giving it to her oh so slowly knowing she was going to lose her mind. Mila’s hand that was playing with her clit began to shake hard as she shut her eyes. She threw her head back shuddering her release.