Shattered Strength: Shadowcrest Pack Series Book Two

by B. Livingstone

  “Riley, fuck, are you okay?” he asks frantically, breath heaving, his eyes wide and scanning the room as though searching for a threat. The look on his face causes me to laugh which only results in more groaning and cursing in pain. “Serves you right for scaring me and then laughing at me like that, young lady,” Wild scolds me as Axel walks in the room.

  “Hey, someone has to take joy in your antics,” Axel quips, pulling another smile from me, even if it does hurt.

  “Why am I in so much fucking pain?” I plead with him for answers.

  Axel comes to my side and gently helps to slide my legs over the edge so I can sit up straighter. The excruciating process drawing whines and groans from me the whole time. Axel takes a seat by my side as he replies, “You rejected the shift for years, Riley. This caused a sort of reset in the shifter clock. Reverting your body to a time before your first shift. Therefore, when you shifted last night, it was like shifting for the first time. That’s why it hurt so much, however that is not why you are in so much pain this afternoon.” My eyes grow huge in disbelief, afternoon, shifting my attention to the clock over the door which reads 2:34 p.m. Fuck. “Yes, it’s the afternoon. However, to be fair we didn’t get in till after sunrise. Now, as to why you’re in so much pain, that has to do with your wolf and her playfulness.” He smiles as he replays the scenes in his head and then starts to giggle.

  “What? What is it?” I am dying to hear what it is that put that joyful look on his face.

  Axel

  We run until we realize that Riley’s scent has grown faint. Turning around she is nowhere in sight.

  “Fuck, where is she?” Reed demands through our wolf link.

  “Where the hell is Cree?” Enzo barks.

  Sniffing the air, I bark as I pick up her scent along with that of a stag. “She’s hunting.”

  “Damn, that was fast,” Wild remarks with a snicker, which his wolf also voices.

  We take off as a pack after our mate. Our wolves having no problem tracking her scent. We break through the underbrush a few minutes later to find Cree standing over Riley who is on her back. His snout is pressed into her neck. This causes growls to go up from each of our wolves. The bear lifts his head and I swear he rolls his fucking eyes at us. To be fair he has every right to claim her as the rest of us, seeing as she is his mate as well, and we all just growled at him for what looks to be him claiming his mate. Riley slowly rises to her full height. Seeing our tense reaction to what we saw, Riley crouches into a warrior stance, lips pulled back baring her fangs, ready to defend her bear mate. Looking Riley over we can all see that he clearly did not claim her.

  “Back it down, guys. She’s fine and he didn’t go against her wishes. However, we won’t be if she attacks. She’s seeing us as a threat to her mate,” I reassure and warn the other wolves. One by one they each relax their stance and Riley mirrors the act. Just as we’re about to approach, a stag races through the brush and Riley takes off after it.

  Following after her, we race through bushes, around trees, and over one cliff that Riley ends up rolling down rather than jumping.

  “That’s gonna hurt in the morning,” Wild chuckles out. He’s not wrong about that.

  Catching up, we find Riley in a standoff stare down with the stag she has cornered against the cliff wall. The stag has his head lowered; antlers pointed out ready to pierce the one who dares to attack. Riley has her fangs bared, front lowered, ready to pounce. Before she can act, Cree growls from the top of the cliff startling the stag and causing it to look up. Riley leaps into action, pouncing and wrapping her jaw around the stag’s throat, hanging there while he bucks around trying to shake her off. We all stand back and just watch as she takes down her prey, not needing us in the least.

  “She is fucking incredible,” Enzo admires his mate.

  We all howl in agreement.

  Once the stag stops moving Riley makes one final deep bite into his neck, snapping it and ensuring her kill. She trots back over to the rest of us, blood dripping from her muzzle. There’s an extra bounce in her steps, and sway in her hips, strutting her fierceness. Cree rejoins the group, heading straight for Riley. She stands unmoving as he bends down and licks away a line of blood from her snout. Each of the guys slowly approach, and lick her muzzle sharing in the blood of her prey, myself last. As I finish licking the last of the blood from Riley, she returns my gesture with a lick to my own muzzle which excites my wolf. Her first sign of acceptance.

  We all join Riley in sharing her kill before continuing our run to Prospect Point. There we find a nice open spot with a wondrous view of the water's horizon. Riley lies down near the edge of the cliff, belly full and soul at peace. We each take up a spot surrounding her in a protective circle. There we stay, enjoying the peace and comfort our animals feel being with their mate for the first time and just watch as the sun rises over the horizon.

  Riley

  Silence rings out over the room while I soak in the words from Axel’s retelling of the previous night.

  “Wait a minute and rewind. I fucking killed Bambi’s dad? Then I fucking ate him? Gods, I’m gonna be sick.” My stomach sours thinking about the blood involved in killing something, anything. Axel runs his hand down my back, applying a little pressure on each side of my spine and all thoughts of blood and Bambi’s dad are forgotten as he works the little knots along my spine. A soft euphoric moan escapes me. Gods, he’s good at getting me to do that.

  “Axel, fucking stop it,” Cree barks from what sounds like the living room.

  “Gods, are you all here?” I ask, confused as to why they would be in my apartment.

  “Yes. We were concerned about how you would be feeling when you woke. That was a hard fall down the cliff. While your wolf seemed fine, she is just as stubborn as her human counterpart. We couldn’t be sure there weren’t some serious consequences to the fall,” Axel remarks with a smirk.

  “What can I say? It’s in the genes.”

  Axel laughs, a true genuine laugh. I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face or the feeling of rightness that drives away some of the emptiness I just now noticed in my chest. The same feeling I felt as a wolf last night during the moment I shared with Cree.

  As though he’s reading my emotions and thoughts Axel moves to comfort me, wrapping his arms around my sore and exhausted body. The pain at first is excruciating but the longer he holds me the more I can feel my wolf under the surface. Her healing heat spreads throughout my body, amplified by Axel’s own energy.

  “Wow. That’s incredible. What did you do?” I ask, stretching my arms out in front of me and wiggling my toes. The pain is there but dulled significantly.

  “Nothing really. Just gave you a boost of healing energy, you did the rest.”

  “My wolf you mean.”

  “Riley, you are one in the same. You need to try to remember that. She is an extension of you. Yes, you can talk to her, feel her, but she is you.”

  “Riley. Get your cute ass in gear. You’re late,” Enzo bellows from the kitchen. I give Axel a puzzled look.

  “Training,” he whispers back.

  Slinking down and hiding my face with a pillow I grumble, “Fuck.”

  “Are you trying to fucking kill me?” I snap from my place on the mat, again.

  “Block me and you won’t end up on your back,” Enzo jokes from his standing position above me. “Although, I’ll admit that’s not a bad place to have you.”

  Say again.

  My mind goes blank as my body reacts to his words. My core heats and clenches at the thought of him; me on my back on this mat with him looming over me. Kissing me. Caressing my body. My breathing becomes rapid and the air from the overhead fans chills the sweat pooling on my skin, causing a shiver to run down my spine and mingle with the thoughts of Enzo’s touch.

  “Riley? You okay down there?” My eyes snap open as his baritone voice jars me from my fantasy. His eyes are dilated as he glares at my throat. I realize then my fingers are rest
ing at the hollow of my throat near the swell of my breasts. The same spot I pictured Enzo’s lips and teeth on. Fucking duck.

  “Hmm? Oh yeah, I’m fine.” Reaching down Enzo takes my hand and pulls my still aching body back to a standing position. His hands find my hips and my core clenches again with how much closer his hands are to the place I really want him to touch.

  Fucking hell, no. I will not go there. Friend-zone, remember that place? I chastise myself. I will not break the boundaries I put in place.

  Mate. My wolf kindly reminds me.

  Thank you, I know. Clearing my throat and taking a deep centering breath, I take a step back out of Enzo’s hands. The look in his eyes is almost painful. A look of rejection and empathy in them causes the hollow pit in my chest to reopen and make itself known.

  “I’m sorry, Enzo,” I voice as I turn around and start for the women’s locker room. I make it two steps before I’m halted abruptly by two muscular arms banding around my center. A solid chest pressed against my back and the feel of hot breath fanning across my ear.

  “Don’t be sorry, Riley. Never be fucking sorry.” Enzo gently kisses my ear and I want more than anything to melt into his touch. My shoulders sink in defeat, and the ache in my chest grows stronger.

  Weakly, I voice the doubt and defeat that has been eating away at me, “I don’t know how to keep doing this, Enzo. My body, wolf, and what I think is my soul, all tell me to want this. To want you. To mate and be whole. That you guys are the missing pieces of me. But my mind and another deeper part within me, a part much louder, tells me not yet, it’s too soon. Then there are the voices of doubt that tell me I’m dirty, tainted, too broken, just not good enough for you. That you’ll leave as soon as you all come to realize that. It’s so fucking frustrating, this damn push and pull,” a hitch catches in my breath as my voice begins to break. I take a second before I can continue, “It feels like I’m being torn in so many different directions. I don’t know how to make it stop. I want it to fucking stop.”

  Resting his chin on my shoulder, he slides one of his hands up to rest over my heart and whispers, “What does your heart tell you?” There’s no judgment, no frustration, nor irritation in his voice. There’s just understanding, and patience.

  Closing my eyes, I focus inward, trying to just feel my heart, to understand its desires but all I feel is the empty hollow pit. “It’s broken. Shattered. Hurt,” breaking, my voice trembles on the last word and a tear slips free. Frustrated with myself for my lack of strength, lack of confidence, and lack of self-worth, I break free of Enzo’s arms. I know I am only able to because he let me go, he easily could have held me there. Pulling my hair free of the ponytail it’s bound in, I run my hands through my hair trying to release some of the tension I feel building. Turning back to face him, my vision blurs with unshed tears as I search his face. I don’t know what I’m looking for, a healing balm to my tattered soul, or maybe some hint of frustration with my wishy-washy nature. Whatever it is, I can’t find it. The only thing I find is compassion and understanding, same as the tone I heard in his voice.

  I close my eyes and place my hand over my heart, resting it there. Focusing on the feeling of my heart pounding under my palm, I center myself before opening my eyes and soul, exposing myself completely to Enzo’s inspection. Every scar, both physical and emotional on display. “My heart has been broken, Enzo. Shattered into a million pieces, over and over again. Each time causing the pieces to become jagged and splintered, until they have been ground to dust. They will never fit together again. I’ll never be whole again.”

  I can feel the pieces left of my shattered heart breaking into even smaller bits as I relive the memories from the deaths of my family and the betrayal of those I trusted. I wrap my arms around my waist, holding myself together. The feel of Enzo’s hands caressing my arms and the sound of his voice breaks through the storm playing in my mind.

  “In that case, Riley, we’ll have to make a new picture with them. Adding a little bit of each of us to help hold you together and remind you that you are never going to be alone again.” The smile that spreads across his face is possibly the most gorgeous thing I have ever seen. Returning his smile with a small one of my own, I nod my head in agreement.

  Leaning in towards me, his eyes never leaving mine as his hands come to cup each side of my face. He stops with his lips just millimeters from mine. I know he’s leaving this choice to me, letting me decide if I’m ready to take this step.

  If I kiss him everything will change. Friend-zone gone; we’ll enter a new territory. Am I ready?

  Trust our mate. My wolf whispers to me.

  Untwining my arms from my waist, I grab ahold of his forearms and lean in to close the last whisper of space between us. Sealing my lips to his.

  Chapter Five

  Enzo

  Riley’s soft smooth lips meet mine and a raging spark rushes through my body, lighting every nerve ending on fire in its wake. Shit, what did I start?

  I haven’t felt anything like this in years. Not since her. Fuck! I really did not want to go there, not now.

  Mine. My wolf growls in my head while pushing forward to meet his mate. I have to force him down, trying to hold him back.

  Dude, chill. Don’t scare her. She’ll run. I remind him. Fuck, I want to run. I don’t know if I’m ready for this.

  Riley’s trembling lips move tentatively across mine and I find myself pressing into her. Guiding one hand to the nape of her neck, my fingers tangle in her hair and give a gentle tug, angling her head back. Parting my lips, I slide my tongue along the seam of her lips, enticing her mouth to open, this time granting me full access. Sliding my tongue in along the edge of her teeth, slowly working my way deeper gently, yet demanding more. Her tongue rises to meet me, to tangle with mine. Fucking perfect.

  My hand still resting on her cheek glides down over her shoulder, making its way to rest on her hip. Gripping firmly, near bruising, I pull her body flush against mine. My cock trapped within the confines of my pants is nestled between our heating bodies, growing longer and harder every second I kiss her sweet mouth. The mixed tastes of sunshine and home create a euphoric high that makes my head spin. Gods, we need to slow down.

  Pulling back, I search Riley’s face for any sign of distress or confusion. What I find causes me to become confused. “Riley, you okay?”

  “I think so. That was fucking amazing, Enzo.” She brings her hand to rest on my bare chest over my heart. Her fingers gently trace over the tattoo of a lone wolf howling at a crescent moon I have inked there. Her eyes are fixed on my tattoo while her cheeks turn a deep rosy red as she continues, “I mean, I know we kissed already, that one time but that was different.” Her eyes slowly rise to meet mine and there’s hunger in them I had not seen before. “You know what I mean?”

  The longer I stand there, one hand in her hair, the other on her hip, her body pressed against mine, the more I drown in the hungry pull of her gray eyes. Breathing heavily, I pull my thoughts away from her body for a second to respond, “Yeah. I get what you’re saying.” Leaning down I take her mouth again, this time harder and more demanding. I slide my hand from her hip to around her waist and lift her, her legs naturally wrap around my waist which presses her hot core against my abdomen. Fuck, she’s so hot. Taking two steps forward I press her back against the support pillar as I deepen the kiss and release her hair to slide my other hand to the hem of her shirt, wanting to feel her skin on mine. Pinning her between me and the pillar, I use both hands to slide her shirt up just under her chin, hesitant to break the kiss. She doesn’t give me a choice when she fists my hair and forces my face from her with a grin on her face.

  She raises her arm allowing me to slide her shirt over her head and, fuck me, I about come in my pants at the sight of the black and silver sports bra she’s wearing that snaps in the front. One flick of my fingers and I could have her open and exposed to me.

  No, not today. I remind myself. My wolf whines in protest, he wa
nts to take his mate now, here, and without mercy.

  Sliding my hands back under her ass to hold her up, I press my chest to her front, relishing in the feel of her bare skin on mine. The connection between us growing stronger and brighter with every touch, every kiss, and every embrace, be it physical or emotional.

  Locking my hands in place I gently kiss her collarbone before confessing, “Fuck, Riley. I am trying really hard here to be a gentleman. I really don’t want to fuck this up. Tell me you’re okay. Please.”

  Riley

  Enzo’s plea worries me. “Enzo, I promise you I’m okay. Why would you think you were fucking this up?”

  Bracing my arms on his shoulders, I unwrap my legs from his waist and he hesitantly places me back on my feet. He starts to step away but I quickly wrap my arms around his waist and pull him into an embrace. His breath catches before he releases it and slowly returns my embrace.

  “Enzo, I know you didn’t want this. I felt you fighting to stay away from me in the beginning, then trying to keep an emotional wall between us. I tried to as well, so I know what it feels like. But we’re here now, together. We’re both moving forward in this, unable to fight it anymore. You told me when I was ready to share that you might be too. I think I’m ready if you are.” I hold him there a moment longer before taking a step back, immediately missing the warmth of being in his arms.

  I turn to pick up my shirt off the floor while Enzo seems to battle with himself. Standing up straight, I can feel his warmth at my back; so close his harsh breathing causes my hair to shift with every exhale. Taking a small step backward, his front connects with my back and his arms come around me, locking me in place. I can feel the panic rising in him as he wars with himself. “It’s okay Enzo. I understand if you’re not ready.”