A Fortunate Woman

by Jennifer Lyndon

  In my research with the woodrose plant, I’d already created a tincture at home, in my kitchen. It was pungent smelling, and made me feel giddy and lightheaded when I inhaled the fumes. I was concerned it might be too potent. Still, I continued to work on the problem of the tincture up until our departure date for the celebration at Saranedam. Lia wanted to try the tincture I had been working so obsessively on, but I was hesitant. The night before we left for Saranedam, she finally convinced me.

  We waited until Astrid was asleep, and our household quiet, because based on my experience simply sniffing the substance, I was expecting an extremely powerful stimulant. We didn’t want anyone witnessing us in a vulnerable state. I applied a small amount of the substance to Lia’s neck at her pulse point, and an equal amount to my own. It took a very few seconds before the heat spread through me. I reached for Lia, my lips finding the bitter taste of the tincture on her neck. I inhaled the fresh berry scent of her skin and moaned, as she took my lips insistently, turning me onto my back, and biting my lower lip before pinning me beneath her.

  Lia was more aggressive than she’d ever been, shoving my thighs apart abruptly and burying her fingers inside of me. There was no gentleness to her movement, as her mouth took my nipple roughly, biting the tip, her thigh increasing the power of her thrusts as she forced her fingers deeper inside of me at an ever-increasing pace. I almost cried out in pain, but was then having the most powerful orgasm I’d ever had, and Lia was panting over me, sweat dripping from her chin onto my lips, her eyes hungry and wild as they moved over me.

  She didn’t wait for me to recover, but immediately moved down to take me with her mouth, eliciting a moan from deep within me. Again her fingers were inside of me, as her tongue teased me. Ecstasy flooded through me as she kept taking me with her mouth, filling me with her fingers, and then her entire fist, rocking my body with the intensity of her desire, all of her strength focused inside of me, eliciting a nearly painful, primal response in me as I succumbed to her feverish thrusts.

  When she withdrew her hand from inside of me, I tried to calm her, to ease her away from me. “Please, Lia, that’s enough,” I whispered, trying to regain some control over what was happening to my body. Lia wouldn’t allow it. Her fixation was too strong. I doubted she was aware of what she was doing, as I gave in repeatedly to her demands, waves of sexual need passing through me, stripping away my sense of self. I floated in a state of hyper arousal, unaware of anything except the pressure between my legs, the wet mouth moving hungrily over me, and the fingers and tongue demanding my response.

  In the early hours of the morning the effects of the tincture finally faded. My body screamed from the extremes it had been through as Lia rolled away from me, reclining back on our bed. As long minutes passed, neither of us spoke. The reality of those past hours washed through us. After too long spent in dumb shock, I rose into a sitting position, my arms wrapped around my legs protectively, my forehead pressed to my knees. After processing what had happened to us, I left our bed without saying a word. I needed to wash the night from my skin.

  I was soaking in our bathing pool when Lia came seeking me. She was covered by a dressing gown that she gripped tightly shut at the throat and waist. Her eyes were red, as if she’d been crying. She stood at the periphery of the bathing chamber, watching me with the expression of a wounded child.

  “It’s all right, Lia,” I said, needing to reassure her. “I take responsibility. It was my fault. I created the tincture.”

  “But what I did to you,” she said. “I couldn’t stop myself, Pet,” she added. “It was as if I was watching someone else do those things to you.”

  “You can join me if you like,” I offered, sensing she was waiting for permission, and afraid to approach me after the surreal fever of the last few hours.

  “Are you certain you don’t mind?” she asked, her voice so young suddenly. “I thought maybe you came in here to be away from me.”

  I stood up from the bath and approached her, slipping the dressing gown from her shoulders and dropping it down on the floor. I led her to the bathing pool, and stepped down, coaxing her into the water with me.

  “You’re so gentle with me, even after how I was with you,” Lia whispered as I guided her back into my arms. “I didn’t know I had that inside of me.”

  “Let’s not think about it anymore,” I said, wanting to put the nightmarish episode out of my mind. I kissed the birthmark on her shoulder and tasted the bitterness of the tincture in the sweat still on her skin.

  “The worst part is that I enjoyed it,” Lia whispered. “How could I enjoy dominating you in that way?” she asked. “I hate myself.”

  “No. Lia, my darling, it’s all right,” I assured her. “It’s something everyone has inside, that animal part of us. You can’t blame yourself.”

  “Did I hurt you?” she whispered.

  “Please, don’t think about it anymore,” I whispered, not wanting to admit she’d hurt me more than once. I noticed a bruise on my wrist and dropped my hand beneath the warm water so she wouldn’t notice it.

  She turned around in my arms, straddling me so she could face me, to gently kiss my forehead. “I love you,” she whispered before kissing my cheek. “I love you,” she said again, kissing my other cheek. “I love you,” she said against my lips, gently brushing them with her own before tilting her forehead to touch mine. As I gathered her closer in my arms, she sighed. “I love you more than I can ever express, Pet,” she whispered.

  “Lia, I know that,” I replied, cradling her head with one hand. “I love you, too.”

  We left for Saranedam the following morning. Astrid rode in front of me in the saddle for the first leg of the journey, enthusiastically helping me hold the reins. Lia rode beside us. She had chosen Fiora that morning, claiming she missed riding the mare, but I knew Lia was feeling guilty about the events of the previous evening and was trying to compensate. She wanted to be as little trouble as possible. Somehow that connected in her mind with allowing me my own horse. I accepted the token gesture, hoping she could use it to push the memories of the evening from her mind.

  I was hoping to breed Fiora to Lore’s stallion, one of the last colts out of Abri and Ronin, while we were at Saranedam. I eyed the mare with interest as I imagined the foal she might have. Fiora was an attractive horse. There were no faults to be found in her confirmation. She was only slightly smaller than Khol, and though a truly excellent jumper, less agile than Khol over fences.

  “How are you feeling today?” Lia asked, noticing my attention on her.

  “I’m well,” I replied. “I might have slept a bit more,” I confessed, smiling to cover my fatigue.

  Lia nodded, a troubled expression clouding her beautiful face. I knew she was remembering what had occurred between us again. Her face turned red and she looked away, toward the hills beyond us.

  “Did you bring it with you?” she asked. I knew exactly what she was referring to, the tincture. My mind had been on that acrid liquid all morning. I pretended I didn’t understand her.

  “Bring what, darling?” I asked, feigning ignorance.

  “You know what!” she said with a sharpness she’d never used with me before.

  I didn’t respond to her question, but instead kissed the top of Astrid’s head, inhaling the sweet soapy smell of my daughter’s hair. Astrid squirmed around to gaze up at me, offering a toothsome grin. I smiled back at my daughter. Astrid began singing one of the songs I sang to her before bed at night, only she had almost all of the words wrong, since her vocabulary was still quite limited, and the tune was off. I laughed.

  “You have a beautiful voice, Astrid,” I observed, prompting her to gaze up at me as she sang.

  “I’m sorry I snapped at you, Pet,” Lia said softly. “I’ve done nothing right since last night. Will you tell me, please, did you bring it with you?” she asked, trying again.

  “Did you want me to bring it?” I asked.

  “I don’t know,” she
replied switching from Fae to Old Noge, though none of our guards spoke either language. “I can’t stop thinking about it,” she admitted. “Even now all I can think about is your body, and how I want to touch you.”

  “I brought it, but not for us to use,” I replied. “I think I might have stumbled upon some dark form of magic,” I added. “I want to ask M’Tek about it. I learned of the properties of the woodrose from a peculiar book she left at our home, so she must know something about it. She and Lore have unusual powers. M’Tek may be able to tell me how to make the tincture safe. Otherwise, it’s useless to me.”

  “You’re not planning to tell her what I did to you, that I lost control in that way?” Lia asked, that crease forming in her forehead, signaling her concern.

  “Lia, my darling,” I said, shaking my head. “You know me better than that, unless last night undid the past five years we’ve loved one another.”

  Lia’s gaze shifted over Astrid for a moment, watching her daughter’s hands moving gracefully with the reins. When she returned her attention to me her eyes were red. She turned Fiora away from the formation and dropped to the back. We didn’t speak again until we stopped for the midday meal.

  I was walking with Astrid along the river, bargaining with her, trying to talk her into relieving herself while we were stopped, in order to prevent the need for a diaper change later. Astrid was being obstinate, refusing to capitulate, holding out for I know not what prize, when Lia appeared at my side.

  “Pet,” Lia said, interrupting my rather serious negotiations with Astrid.

  “Yes, darling,” I replied, careful to keep my voice neutral.

  “Have one of the guards watch Astrid for a few minutes. I need a moment alone with you,” she said.

  I did as I was told, leading Astrid back through the woods to Kashun, so that he could keep an eye on her. He immediately organized three guards to form a perimeter around the child, and then assured me that she would be safe. Hesitantly, I left Astrid in their care to return to Lia. She was standing at the edge of the river, her arms wrapped across her chest in a protective stance. I approached her cautiously.

  “What did you want to talk about?” I asked in an even voice, once I stood close to her.

  “I don’t want to talk. I’m afraid of what I might say,” she said. “I’m all over the place today.”

  “All right, then what?” I asked.

  “Will you put your arms around me?” she asked. “I need to have you close, to feel that everything’s the same between us, that you still love me the way you did yesterday.”

  “Of course everything’s the same, Lia,” I said, wrapping my arms around her.

  She pressed her face against my neck and inhaled deeply before sighing. “You smell so wonderful, Pet,” she whispered. “You always have, like lemon tree flowers,” she observed. “No one smells like you.”

  “It’s because I’m in love with you,” I said gently. “You never need to doubt me as long as you smell lemons when you’re in my arms,” I said, running my fingers through her hair, trying to soothe her. “I’m sorry I ever made that tincture,” I observed. “I had no idea it would cause such a reaction.”

  “No. It was me,” Lia said. “There’s something wrong with me, that caused me to behave that way. You never tried to dominate me.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with you,” I assured her.

  “Even now, the smell of you, the softness of your skin, I keep imagining my hands on you, and my tongue tasting you,” she admitted. “It’s extremely difficult to hold myself back.”

  I lifted her chin and kissed her gently. I could feel her muscles tightening as if she wanted to take control, so I tightened my hold of her until she relaxed. I pressed my lips to hers again, gently nibbling her lower lip before drawing back from her. Her eyes were closed, her entire body wrapped up in that contact, as she waited. I adored the smooth plains of her face, the plumpness of her lips. I kissed her again, this time opening my mouth to her, inviting her eager response. She was trembling when I drew back. Her pale eyes opened slowly, her half-lidded gaze moving over my face.

  “I ache with wanting you,” she whispered, taking my hand, pressing it to her throat. I could feel the force of her heart, and see she was flushing. “Can you feel what you’re doing to me, Pet?”

  “We need to head back, Lia,” I said. “Kashun isn’t really the right person to be watching Astrid. He set up a perimeter to guard her, as though she were a prisoner.”

  Lia wrapped her arms around me and very gently captured my lips. When I responded, she took my hand and guided it down to the ties of her breeches. I quickly untied her pants, and pressed my hand inside her clothes, and down between her thighs. Lia was wet. Before I even pressed between the folds of her, my fingers were already coated and slick. Her hands pressed into my back holding me close. “Please, Pet, I need you inside of me. Please,” she whispered, her breath warm against my neck.

  I slid two fingers deep inside her. The walls of her clinched around them as she strained, moving frantically against my hand, grasping my neck tightly, as her other arm wound across my back. Her lips closed on my shoulder as she held me tighter, driving me, as the walls of her pulsed around my fingers. She lifted her head and groaned next to my ear before a sharp cry escaped her lips. I muffled the sound quickly, with my own mouth covering hers. Every muscle in her body tensed as her neck arched back, breaking the contact of our lips. Then suddenly she was collapsing. I caught her quickly, supporting her weight with one arm as her knees buckled under her.

  “Wait, Lia! I can’t hold you like this,” I said, my fingers still inside of her as I braced against her weight in an effort to keep her upright.

  I eased my hand from between her thighs and guided us both down to our knees, and then to the ground. She was gasping hard against my neck, her hair tickling my skin, still recovering. I held her in my arms waiting for her breathing to slow.

  After a few minutes she seemed to come back to herself. Wearing a dazed sort of expression, she lifted her head to focus on my face. I quickly worked to tie her breeches at the waist as she tipped her head forward, capturing my lips in a languorous kiss.

  “Darling,” I said against her mouth. “We need to get back to the guards. I’ve left Astrid with them too long. They’re not qualified to watch her.”

  Lia nodded and rose to her feet. I found my own feet hurriedly, and went to wash my hands and face in the cool water of the river. When I returned to Lia, she caught my still damp hand, lifting it to her lips. I gently reclaimed my hand in order to brush the leaves from her clothing, giving a cursory glance to my own breeches, and sweeping away the crushed leaves and dirt marking my knees.

  “Come along,” I said, reaching a hand out to beckon her. “We’ve been too long.”

  She compliantly fell in step with me, holding my hand as we made our way back to the guards. I was certain they knew what we had been doing, by the way they carefully avoided my gaze. I prefer never to show vulnerability in front of those who are required to respect me. In that moment I had no choice. With Lia, I was entirely defenseless. She could bring me to my knees, any time she chose. I went directly to Astrid and gathered her up in my arms; placing a kiss on her forehead as her little hands gripped my shoulders.

  “Please, everyone, eat!” I called, wishing they hadn’t waited for us.

  -CH 13-

  Lia and I didn’t have another chance to slip off into the woods together, and Astrid slept in our tent, creating an effective barrier between us at night. Still, Lia’s mood was remarkably improved after our interaction in the woods. For the remainder of our journey, she was so overly attentive to me, that occasionally it caused confusion for our exceptionally reserved Vilken guards.

  Astrid was far easier to travel with than I would have expected, dividing her time between riding with Lia and then with me. Having to stop to change her diapers slowed us down some, but it could easily have been worse, traveling with an eighteen-month-old chi
ld. For her part, Astrid truly seemed to enjoy the journey.

  We arrived four days before the solstice. M’Tek and Lore waited on the steps of Saranedam Palace to greet us, a consideration rarely shown to guests. I happened to be riding with Astrid at the time, so Lia went to her mothers, eagerly wrapping her arms around M’Tek, and then somewhat hesitantly around Lore, as I carried Astrid forward. Lore quickly collected her granddaughter from my arms, bestowing a stiff smile on me, which failed to reach her eyes, before leaning in to offer me a cursory hug.

  “I’m not certain what I should say to you just now, except, why have you brought a horde of Vilkerlings to my palace steps?” Lore whispered next to my ear, her hand still resting on my shoulder.

  “Fourteen is hardly a horde, Lore, and they’re my guards. You’re not suggesting that I should travel with your daughter and granddaughter without taking proper precautions,” I observed.

  “Certainly not, my friend, but those creatures are the very danger I’d have my family protected against,” she replied quietly. “You should have requested your Noge guard. I would gladly have sent them to escort you, if only to avoid this awkwardness,” Lore observed. “I honestly don’t know what to do with your Vilkerlings. After all, I can’t ask the Fae and Noge guards to share quarters with them.”

  “Don’t concern yourself,” I said quietly, hoping the Vilkerlings weren’t aware of what was being said. My gaze shifted to my steadfast guards, Kashun in particular, whom I viewed as a good friend. “I’ll have them accommodated in the village,” I said. “They might prefer that actually,” I added, as I noticed the hate in Kashun’s dark eyes as he glared at Lore.

  “Don’t be ridiculous, Pet,” Lore argued. “I invited you. It’s my responsibility to see to housing your entourage, whatever they may be. I’ll send someone to check with one of the inns.”