Lucky Me

by B. B. Donnelly

  There is a knock on the door.

  “It’s Tammy.”

  “Come in.”

  She walks into the room with a plate of chocolate chip cookies and a glass of milk. She sits down on the bed next to me and places the cookies and milk on the side table.

  “You doing okay?”

  “Yeah, I just needed to cry it out. Thank you for everything. I’ll try not to burden you too much.”

  “Oh honey, I love having you here. You bring life back into this house. You bring light back into Asher.” She says, surprising me.

  “I doubt that.”

  “You don’t see what I see.” She gives me a knowing look.

  “He has a funny way of showing it.” I say with a roll of my eyes. She laughs.

  “He is a man. They can be complicated.” She says, handing me a cookie. I take it, but stare at it.

  “Tammy, I love him.” I blurt out.

  “I know honey and he loves you.” I shake my head in denial.

  “He keeps pushing me away. He told me he doesn’t care about me like that.”

  “He is a stubborn one but keep pushing. He will give in.” She says with a wink.

  “I would if I knew there was a chance.”

  “There’s always a chance.” She says slyly, then she gets a serious look on her face.

  “Asher took our divorce hard. He worshiped his dad, but as he got older, he saw some things he wasn’t supposed too.”

  “Like what?” I ask, cautiously. She sighs.

  “His dad with other women in the media. His friends at school would make comments. When he was younger, I could protect him from it, but as he got older…. Well, you know how the media is. I tried my best to keep my feelings from him about those issues, but unfortunately, I went through a really rough time. He saw the worst in me and his dad. Then with your mom…. that was the final straw. I should have divorced him long before that, but that betrayal…….” She looks away and I can tell it still hurts.

  “I understand. You don’t have to say anymore.” I say, putting a comforting hand on hers. She smiles at me.

  “Asher has a hard time believing in love and trusting people. I think you are the perfect person to bring happiness back to my son. Definitely not that Natalie chick.” She says and I laugh.

  “She’s obnoxious!” She says, wrinkling her nose.

  For over an hour, we gossip and talk about all kinds of things that I dreamed of talking about with my own mother. We eat all the cookies and I feel a lot better. I’m lucky to have her in my life. She treats me like how a mother should treat her daughter.

  Suddenly there is a honking noise outside. She gives me a knowing look.

  “Come on.” She says, taking my hand.

  She leads me down the stairs and to the front door. She pauses and opens the door with a flourish.

  I step outside and see my truck in their driveway. Asher is standing next to it with a pleased smile.

  “Tell me again that he doesn’t love you?” She teases.

  “Oh my god!” I sob out.

  I run to Asher and jump on him. He grabs me around my hips as I cling to him. My legs are wrapped around his waist and my head is lying on his shoulder.

  “Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!” I say to him between happy tears.

  He squeezes my body and I ignore the pain from the wreck. I release my legs and he slowly guides me down his body. He wipes a tear from my face with a satisfied look.

  “Happy?” He asks with a laugh.

  “This is the best thing anyone has ever done for me.” I say, choking back the happy sobs.

  “You’re welcome.”

  I don’t think, I just act. I lean in and pull his head down to mine. I kiss him gently. His lips meld with mine and in the next instant, it’s not a simple thank you kiss. He let’s loose and deepens the kiss. I grip the back of his head. I don’t want this to end.

  Suddenly, he growls and jerks away from me, bringing me back to reality.

  “Stop, Charleigh, just stop!” He says.

  Without a word, he walks back into the house. I stand there, staring after him, frustrated.

  I walk around my truck. Even though, I’m disappointed with Asher, I can’t help but be excited. My truck is back!! I jump into the driver’s seat and inhale the familiar smells. I look at my dad’s music keychain dangling down and say a little prayer to my dad.

  “Please, dad, help him get his head out of his ass….”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Asher, Tammy, and I ate dinner together later that night. Asher acted like nothing was different between us. He included me in the conversation and friend zoned me again. Later that evening, Asher and I went to my house when my mom and Tim were gone. We packed up what we could, and I officially moved into their guest room.

  My mom has not tried to contact me at all. It hurts, but I’m finding that my life is happier without having to worry about Tim or her drama any longer. Tammy is all the mother I need. She treats me like her daughter and gives me all the love I’ve always craved from my own mother. She even makes us breakfast.

  “Hey, kids, get going or you are going to be late for school.” She yells out the next morning.

  I walk into the kitchen and greet her. She gives me a side hug as she flips the eggs. I’ve been trying to help out around the house and be the perfect houseguest. I don’t want to get kicked out until I’m at least eighteen.

  “Tammy, do you have any Advil or Tylenol? My body is still sore.” I say.

  “Oh sweetie, I didn’t know you were so hurt!” She exclaims.

  “No, I’m good, just a little sore is all.” I reassure her.

  She pops open a cabinet and grabs the bottle for me. I take two with a glass of water.

  “Do you feel okay to go to school?” She asks worried.

  “Oh yeah, I’m fine.”

  I covered some of my bruises with makeup and let my long dark hair fall loose around my face to help conceal what makeup can’t.

  I dread going to school. How is Asher going to act?

  Speaking of the devil…

  “Hey, Mom. Charleigh.”

  He greets me and then avoids my gaze. Great, just what I thought…. Asshole Asher is back. Why do I care about him so much? Why does he have to look so hot today? I swear he doesn’t even try. He is mouthwatering. He is wearing an Orphans black t-shirt and ripped jeans. His hair is all messy like he just rolled out of bed and somehow it still looks great.

  “Eat up. You guys have a busy day ahead of you.” Tammy says and I look at her confused.

  “Asher! You didn’t tell her?” She exclaims. I swing my gaze back towards him with a questioning look.

  “We have a meeting with our label after school. They need to go over some stuff before our performance Saturday night. I guess the event took off. We are selling a shitload of tickets. It’s now a full-blown concert. After the meeting, we need to rehearse. I would rather just skip school, but…”

  “Nope, not happening! You wanted to do this, and you will see this through.” Tammy chides and I hide my smile.

  “It was more Michael.” He mutters.

  “Doesn’t matter, you commit, you finish it. Besides I would love to see you get ready for prom and graduate…” She trails off with a wistful smile.

  “Okay, mom.” Asher says, shoving a piece of toast in his mouth.

  He rolls his eyes but gets up and kisses her on the cheek. He grabs his bag and walks out the door without a glance back.

  I chew on my toast and shove in some eggs to be nice. She gives me a sympathetic look, but I just shrug.

  “I guess I better get going.”

  “Okay, honey, have a good day.” I nod and grab my bag. I’m almost to the door when I turn back.

  “Hey, Tammy.” She turns to look at me.

  “Thanks for everything. This is really great.” I say and she smiles as tears gather in her eyes.

  “You’re welcome, sweetheart.” She says and I head
out before she cries in front of me. I wanted to make her happy not feel sorry for me.

  Asher is already gone as I climb into my truck. I blare the radio and of course, a song by The Orphans comes on. I sing along and feel pretty confident that I won’t fuck up the performance to bad this Saturday. I really can’t afford too if this is what I want to do with my future. This is my chance. My lucky shot.

  I pull up into the school parking lot and my heart sinks a little at the sight before me. Asher is with Natalie’s group. I get some satisfaction because she is trying to get his attention, but he is talking to some football players and ignoring her. She finally gives up and starts chatting to Brett, the quarterback.

  I lock up the truck and walk right past them without looking at anyone. I feel his eyes follow me. If he wants to play this game, then I can play. I walk to my locker and I see Trix standing in front of it. She spots me and stands taller. Something is wrong.

  “What’s wrong?” I ask her. She gives me a sad look.

  She moves to the side and WHORE is painted on my locker door. She pats me on the shoulder.

  “How original….” I mutter under my breath.

  “Oh look, someone wrote her name on her locker.” Natalie says, walking past.

  “Must have mixed it up with yours.” I say. She rolls her eyes and flips her hair. I look for Asher, but I don’t see him.

  I go through the day and everything is going as well as expected. I eat lunch with Trix and ignore Asher sitting with the popular kids. There are times that I wish I was still sitting at that table, but then I realize how fake they have to act. When they are one on one, they aren’t so bad, but put them all together and they try to act so indifferent and cruel. I miss it, but yet, I don’t miss who I was becoming. I lost my way after I left that group, but I have never been as cruel as they are. Okay, well, maybe to Natalie, but she is a totally bitch.

  Trix is eating a carrot stick and I can tell something is on her mind. She keeps sighing.

  “What’s up with you?” I ask. She sets down the half-eaten carrot stick.

  “There’s this party on Saturday night.”

  “Okay….”

  “I really want you to go with me.”

  “I can’t. I have the concert.” I say, taking a bite of my apple.

  “Shit! I forgot!” She exclaims, disappointment all over her face.

  “Sorry. I wish I could go but performing in front of thousands of people is kind of important to me.” I tease. She laughs.

  “I don’t blame you! How exciting! Maybe after you could come by?” She says, hopeful.

  “Maybe.” I answer, already knowing I’m not going. She gives me a puppy face.

  “Come on, just think about it!”

  “Why are you wanting to go to this party so bad?”

  “Well, there’s this guy….” She trails off… “Shit, incoming….”

  “Charleigh, looks like you ran into a tree and hit every branch on it. You look atrocious.” Natalie says with a laugh. I swear just put a wart on her nose and give her a black cauldron.

  How did she know about the car wreck? I glance over to where Asher is sitting, but he is engrossed in a conversation with the guys. Did he tell her? Betrayal like no other stabs through me.

  “You really are pathetic. Couldn’t figure out an easier way to kill yourself?”

  “Jesus, Natalie.” Trix says, pissed.

  “Natalie, move along. You are boring me.” I say, acting indifferent.

  “Ash said it is pretty sad how hard up you are for attention.” She says with a flip of her hair. Now, that one hurts, but I don’t show it.

  “It’s pretty sad how hard up you are for his attention.” I reply back, picking up my apple.

  “Jealous much?” She asks, knocking the apple from my hand.

  “Not at all. I don’t have to throw myself at people to get them to notice me. Here’s the thing…. you came up to me. I never approached you. Now, find your broomstick and fly away.” I say. Trix loses it and her laughter brings attention our way.

  “You are a loser and will always be a loser!” She slings back, before flouncing away, blond curls bouncing.

  I sigh and pick up my sandwich nonchalantly. I know everyone is waiting for my reaction and I’m not going to give it. I’ve played this game many times over the years. I’m so over this place. I turn eighteen on Monday, but I still have to graduate from this hellhole.

  Music class arrives and I slouch down in my chair. My music is blaring in my ears and I tug my hoodie up. I close my eyes. There is a few minutes before class starts and I’m listening to The Orphans. I’m tapping my foot to the beat when my earbuds are yanked from my ears.

  I give a lazy look towards Asher. He laughs and pops one of the earbuds in his ear. He nods.

  “Good taste.” He says and I roll my eyes.

  I turn off the music and notice that Mr. Brown is getting ready to start class.

  “Okay, ladies and gentlemen, it’s time to put this song all together. Everyone knows their parts. Asher and Charleigh please come up front. I believe we should start the song out with just the acoustic guitar and then we will join at the appropriate parts. Okay, from the beginning.”

  I stand and go to the front. Mr. Brown puts a mic in front of Asher and me. I adjust it to my height. It’s been a long time since I’ve sung in a mic. I take a deep breath and stare at it for a minute. I close my eyes and collect my scattered thoughts. Feel the music.

  “You ready?” Asher asks, softly. I open my eyes and sigh.

  “Yes.” Without another word, he begins to play the introduction.

  I start singing the first verse softly. I look over at Asher and catch his gaze. His turn. He doesn’t stop looking at me. He sings with his heart and soul. I feel the emotion and by the chorus, it comes together. It’s so powerful with our classmates singing with us.

  The class falls silent as we finish the song together. Our voices mingle and I put everything I have into it. When we finish the last note to perfection…. our connection breaks to the sound of applause.

  Mr. Brown is clapping with a huge, proud smile.

  “Wonderful, just wonderful!” He exclaims, happily. I smile at Mr. Brown and he looks at me warmly.

  “Asher, Charleigh, amazing! Class, that was superb, best I’ve heard out of you! That hard work is paying off! Nationals here we come!” He says and our classmates cheer. Asher smiles but it seems forced.

  We go over it a couple more times, but Asher is becoming even more distant each time we do it. I try to catch his gaze, but he looks down at his guitar. What’s gotten into him?

  The bell rings and he is up, packing up his guitar quickly.

  “Hurry home, Charleigh, we have a meeting.”

  “Yes, dad.” I say, but he just ignores me and is out the door before anyone else. I gather up my stuff and stop to talk to Mr. Brown.

  “Hey.”

  “What’s up?” He asks.

  “I was wondering if you would be okay with The Orphans using this song as one of their tracks on their new cd?”

  “That’s not up to me.”

  “Sure, it is.” I argue, confused.

  “No, Charleigh, it’s up to you. You wrote the song. Maybe you can get credit for it and the others.” He says with a knowing look.

  Even before the radio’s interview, he has always known I have written the songs for the band. He has never come right out and asked me, but I can tell he knows. He had made remarks last year about my songwriting abilities and how he wished I would write more.

  “Thanks.” I say with a smile.

  “No problem and Charleigh… you deserve it. You deserve the credit and everything that comes with it.” He says, with an earnest look.

  I nod and leave the room, choked up. It’s weird for people to have faith in me.

  I arrive back at Asher’s house and don’t even spare my house a look. I can’t stand to see Tim’s car in our driveway. It’s just a stark reminder of how
she picked him over me. I enter the kitchen and spot a tray of goodies on the island countertop. Asher is no where to be found. I plop down on a bar stool and help myself to a chocolate covered strawberry. SOOO good…. I close my eyes and moan at the deliciousness.

  “Am I interrupting? Do I need to leave you two alone?” A sarcastic male voice says from the doorway. My eyes fly open and meet Asher’s smirk.

  “Ha ha, funny.” I say, wiping some juice from my chin.

  He comes and sits down on the other bar stool. He lifts a hand to my face, and I hold my breath. His finger swipes my bottom lip.

  “Missed a spot.” He says and then pops the same finger in his mouth. Holy smokes, that is…. insanely hot.

  “Yum.” He whispers. He stares at me and I get lost… until a loud ringing of a cell phone interrupts. He looks away from me and answers the phone.

  “We are five minutes away.” Someone says, loud enough I can hear them.

  “We are here.” Asher says, before hanging up.

  “Here we go, are you ready?”

  “Should I be nervous?”

  “Maybe.” He responds with a shrug.

  “What the hell kind of meeting is this?”

  “It’s about your image, our image, how we should go about everything… you know…important shit.”

  “So, I should be nervous.”

  “Yep, probably.” He says with another offhand shrug.

  “Are you serious?” I ask, wide eyed.

  “Yes. This is part of it, Charleigh. If you can’t handle everything, they throw at you at once, maybe you shouldn’t be doing this.” He says without a care in the world.

  “Do you not want me to do this anymore? Do you not want me to help you guys?”

  “I don’t care what you do.” He says, but there is something in his eyes. Almost like desperation.

  “Okay, then, I’m doing it.”

  “Okay, then.” He says back like a toddler. He slouches in his chair with his arms crossed.

  “What is your problem? You’re acting weirder than usual.” I say.

  “Nothing is wrong. Chill out.” He says, looking away from me.

  “Whatever.”

  “Yep, whatever.”