To Live Again (Learning to live again, #1)

by Dori Lavelle

  She meandered between the cabinets, stroking the spines of books and pulling out ones she was interested in. When her arms ached from the weight of the books she'd collected, she slipped into a seat at an unoccupied table and flipped open a hardcover: A Guide to Dreara and Her People.

  She skimmed through the first chapter then went back to read it in more detail.

  Dreara is a small, self-sufficient seaside town with just enough amenities to meet the needs of its residents, who are no more than one thousand in number. Around town, one will find three supermarkets, two bakeries, a school, a hospital, a police station, a library, clothing stores, a small cinema, a few pubs, restaurants, and a three-star hotel. For further shopping needs, Limmery, a larger town, is a thirty-minute drive to the north.

  Kelsey also read about the chocolate factory, the central attraction of Dreara, which had served as the largest employer in town since its opening.

  She had just turned the page to Drearan cuisine when someone approached her table. She gazed up to meet the mysterious neighbor's eyes.

  How did he get to the library so fast?

  A flutter ruffled her stomach and for a moment she just stared at him, unable to say a word. He was even more handsome up close. She instantly forgot that she had been annoyed with him just thirty minutes earlier.

  "We haven't been introduced," he whispered. "I'm Shaun, your neighbor."

  Kelsey stretched out her hand and shook his. "Nice to meet you, Shaun. I'm Kelsey. I heard you're an author."

  "Word really spreads fast in this town."

  Kelsey laughed, regretting having said anything. Now he'd think she asked about him. "Well, people talk."

  "They sure do. Yes, I'm an author. I spend a lot of time in here doing research."

  Kelsey folded her arms on the table and tried not to think about how gorgeous he was. "What types of books do you write?"

  "Thrillers. At the moment I'm working on a novel set in Dreara."

  "Sounds interesting."

  "Sometimes. Well, I should get going and leave you to your reading. It was nice to meet you, Kelsey. Enjoy Dreara." He paused. "I've been here for a while, so if you need someone to show you around, let me know. You know where to find me."

  "Thank you. I might take you up on your offer."

  He nodded. "See you around." He turned to leave, but she spoke again before he was out of earshot.

  "Why were you watching me like that... the other night?" She hadn't meant to say the words out loud, but her mouth was doing its own thing. Too late now; he was turning around to face her. She bit her lip. "I mean... never mind."

  His lips tipped into a smile and his gray eyes bore into hers again, making her cheeks flush. "If my memory serves me well, you were watching me too."

  "Only because I felt you watching me."

  "You felt me?" His voice was deep and slightly husky.

  Kelsey's cheeks burned. "I ..."

  "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. You are a beautiful woman. I was admiring you. Something wrong with that?"

  A tingle raced down Kelsey's spine and she lowered her gaze. The intensity of his eyes made it seem as if he was seeing into her deepest thoughts. "No," she said clearly. She braced herself and raised her eyes again.

  "I didn't think so." He winked and strode away.

  Kelsey shut her eyes and took slow breaths, fanning her face with her hand.

  ***

  Kelsey next bumped into Shaun two days later as she was about to get into her car. Not wanting to make a fool of herself again in his presence, she thought of pretending she hadn't seen him, but she was pretty sure he saw her.

  "Kelsey, hi," he said, walking out of his gate and halting in front of his truck. His hair was a sexy mess, and he wore a beige pullover that couldn't completely hide his sculpted chest. "Still enjoying Dreara?" He leaned against the truck and folded his arms.

  "Yes, I am. It's lovely here."

  "Have you had a chance to take a tour yet?"

  "I'm having one today, actually. On my way to the library right now. A sightseeing tour bus is scheduled to do a pickup in thirty minutes."

  Shaun pulled his door open. "Don't bother. I went on one of those. Not worth it. I didn't see as much as I wanted to. And I think the guide was on something."

  "Something?" Kelsey opened her own car door.

  "Alcohol, drugs, something."

  "That must have been quite an entertaining tour." Kelsey laughed.

  "Worst one of my life." He hopped into his truck and stuck his head out the window. "Want a real tour, join me. I know all the great sites. I was planning on taking another look around anyway."

  "Are you sure? I wouldn't want to rob you of your time." A few hours spent with Shaun was both tempting and scary. What if she ended up acting like a lovesick teenager and turned him off? There was already a tingle in the pit of her stomach.

  "It's no bother at all. Come on." He waved her over.

  Kelsey hesitated for a moment, then shut her car door and walked in timid steps toward his truck.

  Inside, she grabbed the sides of her seat and pressed her knees together. Shaun seemed like he'd be a fast driver. Wrong—he was an even slower and more overly cautious driver than she was. It seemed strange that a man like him didn't feel the need for speed. She supposed it was a lesson not to judge a book by its cover.

  ***

  Their first stop was the century-old chocolate factory. Luckily for Shaun and Kelsey, only a few tourists meandered around the museum displays and gift shop, so Shaun and Kelsey strolled unencumbered. They made small talk, mostly about Dreara. No one brought up any personal topics. Even though Kelsey was curious to know more about him, she was relieved not to be venturing into personal territory just yet. It was easier to relax and enjoy getting to know the town.

  They started with an audio tour of the chocolate production line. With headsets on, they stopped in front of each station, where a voice in their ears explained the different stages. They followed the chocolate's journey from bean to bar.

  Kelsey hadn't known the melting point of cocoa butter was just below human body temperature, which was what caused it to melt in the mouth.

  "Do you know chocolate was originally served as a drink and only given to men?" Shaun said as they returned to the entrance. "It was believed to be an aphrodisiac."

  "No, I had no idea. That's fascinating.” She paused. “I enjoyed the tour a lot. And right now I'm really craving chocolate."

  Shaun pointed to a spot near the entrance where a woman was handing out chocolate bars to visitors.

  Once Kelsey had received a bar and started eating it with relish, Shaun asked, "What piece of Dreara do you want to fall in love with next?"

  "Let's be spontaneous."

  Popping another square of chocolate into her mouth, Kelsey spotted a sign next to the information point. She approached it, followed closely by Shaun. "Look." She turned to him, grinning. "This could be interesting. Should we go on one?"

  "What?" Shaun squinted to read the sign. "Oh, a tour of Reamon Castle. It's not far from here. We don't need to sign up for a guided tour. We can give ourselves one."

  "You know what I'd really enjoy? I'd love to go on a real guided tour so I can feel like a tourist. It's more fun that way. Don't you think?"

  "You are a tourist."

  "That is true." Kelsey nibbled on another cube of chocolate. "What do you say?"

  Shaun shrugged. "If the lady wants a tour, the lady gets a tour."

  Despite the cold and damp weather, Kelsey thoroughly enjoyed the tour of the castle. With multiple moats, tiny windows, and thick walls, the place was truly a fortress. Their footsteps echoed off the stone walls as they passed wooden benches and large tables. Colorful tapestries brightened up the halls, and rusted chandeliers glowed dimly. Kelsey was so engrossed in the tour, she almost thought she could hear thundering horse hooves and smell burning torches.

  After the tour, they were allowed to explore the grounds o
n their own, but it was pouring outside.

  "I guess that's it for our excursion," Shaun said.

  Kelsey squinted into the rain. "That's a shame." The castle had whetted her appetite, and she wanted to see more of Dreara.

  "We can continue another day. Ready?" he asked, turning to walk back to the truck.

  She nodded, feeling a pang in her chest. She was a little disappointed that their time together was coming to an end so soon. Shaun may have been mysterious, but he had a great sense of humor and was easy to talk to. She ran after him.

  He opened the passenger door and waited for her to get in, then ran to the other side to climb in beside her.

  "Hang on." He pulled a faded blue towel from the backseat and handed it to her. "You'd better dry your hair or you'll catch a cold."

  "Thanks." Kelsey shivered as water dripped from her hair and face onto the battered seats of his truck, the moisture turning the leather from cappuccino brown to espresso. Shaun watched her with a half smile on his lips.

  After she was finished, Kelsey handed the towel over to Shaun. He fluffed his hair with it, and then started the engine.

  When they arrived at Edgeway Street, Shaun got out and opened Kelsey's door. She took his arm and climbed out, her feet landing into a small puddle of muddy water.

  She pushed the gate open, and he escorted her down the path that led to her front door, shading her from the rain with the towel they’d used earlier. A brief shiver rippled through her as he moved closer, but it had nothing to do with the temperature.

  Chapter Seven

  The crumpled sheets sighed as Kelsey swept them to one side and got out of bed, wincing when her feet touched the cold wooden floor. She curled a blanket over her satin nightdress and pushed open the window.

  The rain-washed air was crisp, cool, and exhilarating. It smelled of Irish wildflowers and the faint aroma of freshly baked bread.

  It felt good to be here, to be alive.

  Kelsey exhaled softly as she looked out at the ocean. She still wasn't sure what happiness meant, exactly. Maybe it was waking in the morning to birds chirping, knowing in her heart that she had made the right choices. Maybe it was standing barefoot in her bedroom, watching weak light streaming through the soft curtains and listening to the fridge humming downstairs. If that was the definition of happiness, then right now, at this moment, she was happy.

  She strode out of the room, her stomach rumbling. When she reached the third step, the doorbell rang and made her jump. She descended the rest of the stairs and opened the door. Her heart fluttered when she saw the man standing on her doorstep.

  Shaun wore a black turtleneck and carried a foil-covered ceramic bowl in the crook of his arm. "Did I wake you?"

  Pulling the blanket tighter around herself, she moved aside. "No. Come on in."

  "Sorry to disturb. I won't be staying long. I just came to drop this off." He indicated the bowl.

  "What's that?"

  "Potato soup."

  Kelsey tilted her head to one side. "You made it yourself?"

  "No, Sarah did. I went to see her and Brian this morning, and she insisted I take it since it's cold today."

  "So, why are you giving it to me? It was meant for you."

  "You were pretty soaked yesterday. This would rule out any chance of you catching a cold. I'll put it in the kitchen."

  Kelsey let him, afraid if she moved too much the blanket might shift or fall. "Thanks."

  She was about to sneak back upstairs to change when he called her name.

  She reached the kitchen doorway and gasped. The whole kitchen floor, as well as the cupboards and kitchen table, were covered in water. She had left the windows open last night.

  Shaun placed the soup on the dining table. "Do you have a mop?"

  "In the bathroom. I'll get it."

  Kelsey returned a few minutes later dressed in a tracksuit with the pants rolled up and her hair pulled back in a ponytail. She carried a mop, a bucket, and several towels.

  Before she stepped into the kitchen, Shaun stopped her. "May I?" He removed his shoes and reached for the mop.

  She extended it to him. "Thanks. I'll wipe the cupboards and table."

  "What are you doing today?" He soaked the mop on the floor and wrung it out over the bucket.

  "I'm meeting Maeve. I'm going to see her at the salon for a haircut."

  "That's a shame." He studied her. "You have beautiful hair."

  Heat spread across Kelsey's cheeks and she touched a lock of hair that had come free from the ponytail. "Thanks."

  "It wasn't meant to be a compliment. I'm only telling the truth." He winked at her then continued with his job.

  Kelsey didn't reply. She didn't know what to say, and her mouth had suddenly gone dry.

  When the water was finally sopped up, Shaun leaned the mop against the wall. "I think we're done here."

  "Thanks for your help, Shaun. I appreciate it."

  "What kind of neighbor would I be if I didn't help?"

  Kelsey found herself wishing he'd done it not to be neighborly, but because he liked her. She already liked him without even wanting to.

  ***

  "He sounds like a catch. What are you waiting for?" Delia asked when Kelsey called later that morning.

  Typical Delia. When she liked someone, she didn't waste time, and often got her fingers burned. At twenty-seven, she had already been divorced once, after marrying a man she had only dated for a month. Now she was in love with her boss at the interior design firm where she worked, and was waiting for him to catch her eye.

  "He's just being a good neighbor, that's all."

  "A neighbor can always change into something else."

  "Maybe, but I'm not ready for that something else. I thought I was ready to move on in that department as well, but... I don't know." She still had a bitter taste in her mouth after Craig.

  "Then have one hot night with the man and walk away. You don't have to enter into a relationship."

  "You're crazy. You know I'm not like that."

  "Kelsey, for once in your life, let down your hair and do something crazy. For years you've worked yourself to the bone. You're only twenty-nine. Why not have fun while you're there?"

  "Hey, I did do something crazy. I got drunk on my second night here, remember?" The splitting headache that had followed that little adventure was unforgettable.

  "That's nothing. People get drunk all the time. You need to do something bigger and more rewarding. Have a one-night stand or two."

  Kelsey shook her head, laughing. She couldn't imagine sleeping with a man and not getting attached. "No way."

  "Come on, Kelsey, you've been a good girl long enough to last you a lifetime. Haven't you ever wondered how it must feel to have one wild night with a hot guy, without all the complications that come with being in a relationship? You've been single for a year. Time for you to get back in the game."

  Kelsey digested her friend's words in silence. Delia was right. She had been a good girl for too long. And where had it gotten her? Nowhere.

  "That neighbor of yours could be the one to convert you." Delia laughed.

  Kelsey bit her lip, thinking of the first time she saw Shaun. How would it feel to be in his arms? To have him do things to her she blushed just thinking about?

  "So, will you do it?"

  "I'll think about it." She moved the phone to her other ear. "Now drop it. I called to tell you I'm getting a haircut today."

  "Since when do you cut your hair?"

  Apart from an occasional trim, Kelsey had never had her hair cut before. "It's time for something new."

  "Good for you. Email me a photo."

  ***

  "Take a seat, Kelsey." Maeve pointed to an empty padded chair. "I'll be with you in a second."

  Kelsey sat and crossed her legs. She pretended to leaf through a magazine she'd brought with her as she eavesdropped on the conversations going on in between shampoos and hairsprays. When the conversation steered to Sha
un, her ears pricked up.

  "I heard something tragic chased him from the United States. He's definitely running from something," said a woman sitting under a hooded dryer as she inspected her nails. She had a button nose and a missing tooth.

  "Who cares? A town can never have enough good-looking men," added another hairdresser who was sweeping the floor.

  Kelsey lifted her feet so the woman could sweep away someone's hair with a broom that was missing half its bristles.

  "You're married, Emma," Maeve scolded.

  "I'm talking on behalf of the single women of Dreara."

  "Still, it would be interesting to know what he's hiding," Maeve continued.

  The toothless woman leaned forward. "I'm pretty sure it has to do with a woman whose heart he broke. He seems to be quite the ladies' man."

  Maeve nodded. "I don't blame the women chasing after him. He looks like a Greek god."

  They all laughed.

  A well-preserved sixty-something woman under another hooded dryer glanced at Maeve. "He's much too mysterious for my liking. Hardly talks to anyone."

  A glow flooded Kelsey's veins; she was one of the few people Shaun talked to. Not that she would say that to any of them. They'd attack her for information she didn't have.

  "But at least he's friendly," Maeve defended him.

  "Except when he's wandering around along the beach. I see him almost every evening when I take Fluffy for a walk. Not one word of greeting," Emma added. "And that haunted look in his eyes makes me shiver." She paused. "Anyway, I don't have to look at other men. I'm happy with my Ciaran."

  Maeve gazed at Emma from the corner of her eye. "I bet you are, Emma. Your husband irons your underwear. Who wouldn't be happy in your shoes?"

  Kelsey stifled a giggle.

  Emma resisted defeat. "Is that jealousy I hear?"

  Maeve raised an eyebrow. "Why would I be jealous? Unlike married women, I'm not tied to one man. When I see a sexy guy, I'm not only allowed to look, I'm allowed to touch."

  A ripple of laughter filled the room, and Kelsey joined in without meaning to.

  Suddenly, the hairdresser with the broom stopped sweeping and scanned Kelsey's face, her beady eyes squinting, and then her mouth dropped open. "Aren't you the O'Neil girl?"