Godhunter

by Amy Sumida

  “Ah,” his smile turned sensual, “I love flowers, they have such sweet nectar in their depths.”

  “It's actually an herb,” I said but Thor spoke over me.

  “Pan,” Thor’s voice was a low growl and the potted orchid on the table actually shook.

  “My mistake,” Pan backed away still smiling. “I didn’t know this bloom was already plucked.”

  “There has been no plucking,” I shot a nasty look at Thor, hoping he caught the message that I didn’t appreciate this type of protection. What, did he think it would make it easier if everyone thought we were an item? Not like he could be seriously into me or anything and not like I cared… much.

  “Hmmm,” Pan moved up again, this time he claimed a chair next to the Navajo goddess. “Which is it then Thor, plucked or un-plucked?” Tsohanoai moved his wife closer as he eyed Pan.

  “She’s spoken for,” Thor leaned forward to glare at Pan.

  “Hey now,” I shrugged Thor’s arm off. “There’s been no plucking or speaking of plucking and there will be no plucking, period. Can we find another word for plucking… one that doesn’t rhyme with plucking?”

  “Enough,” Horus walked stiffly to the table and sat in one of the end chairs, like he was about to bring the meeting to order. Big surprise there. “We’re not here for you to play your silly games with a human, Pan. I would like to know what she’s doing here though.” He looked pointedly at Thor.

  “I caught her stealing the same information I went to collect,” Thor leaned back and let that tidbit sink in before continuing. “When I realized who she was, I decided to ask her to join us. I think she’ll be valuable and besides, it’s the humans’ fight as well.”

  “And who is she? What makes her so valuable?” Horus crossed his muscular forearms and the short sleeves of his black linen shirt rode up to expose a detailed tattoo of a falcon in flight. Too detailed in fact. I’d never seen ink like it. It was like a real bird had been miniaturized and pressed into his skin. Kinda creepy actually.

  “She’s the only human who has ever managed to kill our kind,” Thor spoke very quietly but the words seemed to ring out. Horus and Pan sat forward with a gasp. Evidently I was known by sight to some but not all the gods. I felt like I had just had my superstar status revoked. Oh well, there goes my fifteen minutes. Fame can be so fickle.

  “The Hunter?” Horus raised his head and scanned me dubiously. “This is the Godhunter?”

  “There’s no need to get nasty now,” I didn’t know what was worse, having a nickname among the gods or not living up to it.

  Horus narrowed his eyes. “You don’t look strong enough to kill gods.”

  “Well you don’t look like an asshole but there you go,” I almost clamped my hand to my mouth. I had no filter; the words went straight from my brain and out my mouth. It made me a horrible liar and got me into heaps of trouble. I think the only thing that saved me was the immediate laughter of all the other gods.

  “Come on, Horus,” Thor clamped a large hand down on Horus’s shoulder and I saw him wince. “Admit it, that was funny… and you deserved it.”

  Horus did no admitting and no laughing but the tension did seem to ease from his shoulders. He sat back, nodded, and that was that.

  “Okay,” Thor said, “let’s get started then. Vervain, the documents please.”

  I leaned back into the chair so I could reach down into my jeans, which also put me further into Thor’s side. His breath was in my hair, his scent suddenly stronger, and I quickly yanked the papers from my pants. He took them from me and smoothed them gently on the table. I watched his touch linger over the paper and had a brief moment of imagining those fingers somewhere else. What was it I said about amateurs falling for their prey? I was starting to feel like a supreme idiot. Thor turned abruptly and stared at me, slowly raising an eyebrow.

  “What?” It came out a little harsher than I intended. Nerves have a habit of turning me into a bitch.

  “Did you want to look this over with me?” Thor’s eyebrows shot downward and I felt even worse for being paranoid. So of course I got snappier.

  “Why, can’t you read?” As soon as the words came out, I felt like an ass. “Sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

  “I could hazard a guess,” Pan piped up from across the table but was shushed gently by Estsanatlehi.

  “It's forgotten,” Thor hadn’t even glanced at Pan. He started to skim over the document. “The next strike will be in Washington DC; they’re going to instigate an attack on a peace rally through some al-Qaeda terrorists.”

  “Well that’ll put a damper on the party,” I leaned in closer to see it for myself.

  “Even the protestors will back the war after being shot at,” Horus twisted his lips into a mockery of a smile. “Nothing like murder and mayhem to beget more murder and mayhem.”

  “So what do we do about it?” I looked around the table and the whole thing took on a surreal quality for me. These weren’t just people I was talking shop with, they were gods.

  They all looked at me, the lone human in their midst, and I’m sure more than a few of them wondered how I could possibly help. Hell, I wondered it. I was more of a surprise ambush kinda girl and even then, I had to psych myself up every time I got ready to hunt. I guess all warriors have a battle cry to help bolster their spirits. Mine went something like: I don’t wanna diiiiiie! Well it was more of an internal battle cry.

  “So we go and we stop them,” Brahma looked bored, in fact he was paying more attention to the miniscule pieces of dirt beneath his fingernails than he was to us. He finally looked up and saw our expressions. “What? How hard could it possibly be?”

  Chapter Four

  Five hours later, we arrived in DC. Five hours after Brahma's blasé question. You would think a god would know better than to tempt fate. Did Murphy’s Law work with gods? Did words have more power when spoken by the divine? I’d say yes.

  We traveled to Washington via the normal way for gods, we traced. I highly recommend it. No lines, no cramped airline seat, no bad food, no fat business man sitting behind you kicking your seat, and oh, it’s absolutely free. Yep, it’s good to be a god, or at least a witch with travel benefits.

  It made me wish I had enough magic to navigate the Aether on my own. Alas, I was a lowly human witch and could only manage to use a spell to link trace points. To get from one place to another, I had to have the exact spell to link the two locations. I couldn't just jump in and jump out willy-nilly. It was the difference between letting the current take you and actually steering a boat. Basically, I surfed the Aether. I could paddle out and ride in but I couldn't navigate the channels. No helm, no rudder.

  Navigating the early morning throng in front of the White House was more my speed, though I hated crowds. I managed to get to the edge of the iron fence, where I stood and stared, Thor keeping most of jostling people from hitting me. I couldn’t help it, it was America’s headquarters and I was one of those very proud Americans. It was also my first visit to DC and I was excited to get a look at the White House. I have to say I was a little disappointed though. Valhalla’s way more impressive.

  Thor finally grabbed my arm and pulled me along. People flew out of his way, barely even touching him. I don’t think they even realized they were doing it. They just sort of were not where he was walking. Fascinating, but not as fascinating as my first sight of the President’s house. I continued to stare back over my shoulder as he led me off like a deranged puppy who really wanted to pee on one tree in particular. The president's tree.

  “Can’t I have a minute here?” I tugged on his harsh grip, pulling at individual fingers since his hand was so big I found it necessary to divide and conquer. “I’ve never seen the White House.”

  “It’s a big house and it’s white,” Thor kept walking. “Besides we’re not here for sightseeing. I’ll bring you back when we’re done.”

  I raised an eyebrow at that. It almost felt like I was on a date. A ver
y strange and possibly violent date. Well, probably violent, possibly fatal. Thor held my hand, even after I stopped resisting and started moving purposefully with him. Then there was the mention of a second outing. That's date talk, right? I looked down at our clasped hands and then around at the rest of our group. No one else was holding hands, not even the Navajo couple. Was this just Thor’s way of protecting me? He had made a blood oath after all. Maybe he just forgot he was still dragging me along.

  We reached the park across the street and stopped abruptly. Thor looked around expectantly and since the only place I was looking was at him, I knew the exact moment he found what he was after. Yes, I was staring at him, I had nothing else to do and he was still holding my hand. I was not completely infatuated. I was not an amateur. I was merely keeping occupied and aware.

  I glanced over in the direction he was looking, then looked immediately back for a more thorough inspection. It wasn’t everyday you got to meet two gorgeous Viking gods and I was pretty sure the guy walking up was going to be the second. He wasn’t as tall as Thor but wasn't by any means short, over six feet definitely, and his long hair was blonde not red. His features weren’t as artistically angled as Thor’s but they’d give Brad Pitt a run for his money. Hell, I think Angelina would have swapped good ol’ Brad for either of these two in a heartbeat. If this kept up, I’d need a bib.

  “Ull,” Thor finally let me go to embrace the newcomer in a fast manly hug. You know the quick grab, pat hard, and let go kind of hug that says I must care a lot about this guy because I’m touching him but let’s get this clear…I’m sooo not gay.

  “Hey Dad,” Ull smiled up at the bigger man before looking me over.

  “Dad?” I shook my head to clear it of the lust induced fog and tried to concentrate. “Did he just call you Dad?”

  “I’m his stepson,” Ull slipped around his “Dad” and closed in on me. “And you are?”

  “This is Vervain,” Thor stepped between us again, “she’s going to be working with us.”

  “Great,” Ull pushed past Thor as his smile grew. “I’m looking forward to it, Vervain.” He held his hand out to me but Thor grabbed it before I could and pushed it away.

  “I made her a blood oath,” Thor sounded a little more serious than I thought was necessary over a minor protection.

  “What?” Ull wasn’t the only one shocked, some of the other gods made sounds of surprise as well. Brahma just looked kinda smug to have known a choice bit of info that the other's apparently didn't.

  “She’s human,” Thor let go of Ull and reclaimed my hand. “She didn’t trust me and I believe we need her.”

  “But Dad,” Ull’s eyes were getting pretty round, “a blood oath…where? Heart or lips?”

  “Lips,” Thor locked his gaze on his stepson as if daring him to say more.

  “Well,” Ull shook his head, “at least there’s that.”

  “So she really is spoken for,” Pan looked supremely disappointed. I didn’t know whether to be really flattered or really creeped out by all this attention.

  “Okay,” I used Thor's distraction to yank my hand free and then stood back from the group. “This is starting to sound like something I need to know more about… right now.” I crossed my arms for good measure.

  “She doesn’t know?” Ull stared at Thor, then transferred his intense attention to me. “You don’t know?”

  “So tell me already,” I was not uncrossing my arms till I had an answer... period.

  “It’s not your place to tell her,” Thor glared at Ull.

  “No, it’s not,” Ull was giving Thor’s nasty look right back to him and upping the nasty, “it’s yours, as in it should’ve been done already.”

  “Thor, you honored a human with blood to mouth and then didn't even bother to explain it to her?” Horus walked up behind Ull, looking just as baffled as I felt.

  “Great,” I sighed, “I’m honored. Can someone tell me what I’m so honored about?”

  “We don’t have time for this,” Thor simply pushed his hand between my folded arms, grabbed my wrist, and started dragging me away.

  “Whoa, caveman,” I tried my best to dig my heels in but let’s face it; it was like a parakeet trying to hold back a tornado. Just a whole lot of useless squawking. “I don’t appreciate this, Thor. I’m going to ask nice just once. The next time my sword will do the asking. Now please tell me what’s going on.”

  “You have my protection,” he didn’t even glance behind us to see if everyone was following, “that’s all you need to know. You’ll not be harmed if I can help it.”

  “Uh-huh,” I looked behind me. The gang was all there. “What’s the difference between lips and heart?”

  “I don’t have time to give you an anatomy lesson,” he kept walking.

  “Witty, very witty,” I looked behind me again, this time for help, but they were all wearing matching I don’t know whether to be pissed off or amused stares. “What’s the difference in the oath?”

  “Well obviously a blood oath to the heart is a pledge of love,” he sounded like he was schooling a three-year-old. I don’t like being patronized. Come to think of it, I don’t know anyone who actually enjoys being patronized, including three-year-olds.

  “Well obviously,” I rolled my eyes, “and obviously I’m an idiot because I thought I knew enough about blood oaths to be able to assume you giving me one meant I could trust you.”

  “Odin’s beard, woman!” Thor finally stopped and turned so suddenly, I ended up smack dab in the middle of his chest. I don’t think he even felt it. For me it was like accidentally walking into a telephone pole... which I've done before. Don't laugh, I'm a klutz and it happens to hurt. Don't even get me started on the splinters. “That was the whole purpose of the oath, to let you know you can trust me.”

  I couldn’t stop the laughter, even with my suddenly aching chin. It kind of just spurted out in a surprised guffaw. He looked down at me, then grabbed my upper arms to bring me off my feet so he could stare harder. It served only to burst the giggle dam and I started laughing even harder.

  “What’s so damn funny?” He actually shook me a little.

  “It’s just,” I had reached the point where everything was funny. He could have said “doorknob” and I would have laughed harder. “It’s just…”

  “The suspense is killing me,” Horus’s dry voice came from behind me, starting another round of laughter. People walking by were giving us funny looks. The children with those people were smiling though. They knew a busted giggle dam when they saw one.

  “Okay, okay,” I took a deep calming breath. “It’s just that you’re a god so it’s kinda funny to hear you swear using another god’s name. Like, you just took another god's name in vain. Isn't that breaking a god rule or something?” I giggled. “The only thing that would've been more amusing is if you’d said ‘My beard, woman’, much funier and probably not a rule breaker.”

  The assemblage of gods stared at me with different degrees of disgust and amusement. Thor just looked confused.

  “I don’t have a beard,” he said simply. That’s when the others finally saw the humor. Their laughter, unfortunately, did nothing to improve Thor’s mood. He just snorted, put me down, and resumed walking.

  “I’ve been meaning to ask you about that,” I panted after him. I was really glad I’d worn my flat soled boots. “I thought you were supposed to have a great big, bushy, red beard.”

  “I shaved,” His pace quickened and I practically had to run to keep up, “I've been spending a lot of time in Hawaii lately and it gets itchy.”

  “Okay, great,” I felt like that little dog in the old cartoons that jumps around the big dog panting, Whatd’ya wanna do today, Spike? Huh, Spike? Huh? except this little dog was being dragged. “So you shaved it, looks good. I like the stubble but there’s one other thing I’ve been meaning to ask.”

  “What?!” He stopped again and threw down my hand like holding it was too much encouragement for my
mouth.

  “Where are we going?” My voice was just a tad too timid sounding for me so I couldn’t stop there. “More importantly, are we there yet?” I added a bit of adolescent whine just for good measure.

  “Yeah, Dad,” Ull jumped up next to us. “Are we there yet?” I liked him from that moment on. All we had time for was a grin and a wink to acknowledge our new camaraderie before Thor started pulling on my hand again. I was pretty sure I was going to have bruises.

  He didn’t let up until we’d reached our destination. A secret underground hideout? A chic high-rise loft? No, it was Starbucks. He pulled me with him all the way to the counter.

  “I'd like a grande caramel machiatto with whip,” Thor announced to the barista as she stared dumbstruck. He pulled me forward and put an arm around my shoulders. “You want anything, babe?”

  The woman transferred her attention to me long enough to determine I wasn’t anywhere near as interesting as he was and then went back to gawking at Thor. I wasn’t sure what shocked me more, his ordering what I considered a girly drink (one of my favorites by the way) or his calling me babe.

  “Uh, the same please.”

  “Make it two,” he smiled at the girl and for a second I thought she was going to faint.

  “You want that hot?” She blinked wide eyes at him.

  “Oh, definitely,” he grinned and I thought for sure she was going down. She did sway a little but then she bucked up and rang us up as I silently cheered her on. Hey, I’m on the side of anyone making me coffee. He paid and then steered me to an overstuffed couch to wait as the rest of the gods placed their orders.

  When we were all seated with our beverages, I held and sipped my coffee like it was a lifeline. I was sooo not sitting in Starbucks with a bunch of gods who looked like Benetton and Armani got together to make a magazine spread. I looked up, licking whipped cream off my lips and blinking hard. Yep, they were still there.

  “How long have we got before the rally?” I looked around, wondering if gods wore watches because I sure as hell didn’t. I’m not a watch wearing kind of girl. I could go into this whole long diatribe about how I don’t like to be restricted by time or some other such granola crap but the truth of the matter is, I’m just too lazy to remember to put one on everyday.