by Shayla Black
Once they laid her supine, he and Liam both bound her wrists with cuffs built into the sides of the table. “These restraints aren’t to hold you down, but to hold you open for us. We’re going to ask you questions. Each time you answer honestly, we’ll place a new fastening around you.”
“We won’t be binding you to the table, love,” Liam added. “We’ll be binding you to us.”
Her gaze flipped over to Liam. “Do you mean that?”
“With all our hearts,” Hammer promised.
Liam smoothed the hair from her forehead. “Don’t you feel it?”
“Believing is really hard for me, but I’m trying, I swear.”
Not the answer he wanted to hear, but Hammer understood and accepted it—for now.
He finished tying off the first restraint. Under his hands, Raine trembled, but resolution filled her face.
“We see that and we’re proud. Today will be more difficult, Raine,” Hammer warned. “Yesterday showed the value of good communication. Honesty is a big part of that. I haven’t always been honest with you, and I’m changing that. You have to do the same.” Her silence made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. He refused to make the same mistake twice. “Raine?”
She hesitated for a suspended moment, apprehension flashing in her eyes, but there was no point in moving on unless she committed to the rules and the process. “Yes, Sir. I understand.”
Liam gave a visible sigh of relief. “We have faith in you, Raine. Now put your faith in us.”
They had to get on with the task. Hammer knew giving her time to worry would only let her doubts sneak in.
“I trust you more than I trust myself,” she admitted.
Hammer rocked back on his heels. His heart jumped to his throat. He and Liam exchanged a glance. He saw his own shock reflected back in his friend’s dark eyes.
“Follow your instincts. We’ll help you through,” Liam vowed, then pressed a lingering kiss against her mouth.
As soon as Liam pulled back, Hammer kissed her, too, a slow brush of lips. He nudged them apart, tasted her for a sweet moment, then pulled away.
She looked at them with her heart in her eyes.
It was time to begin.
Liam leaned over the table again, hovering directly over Raine’s face. “Tell me, when you were collared to me, did you continue to cook and clean for Hammer after I told you not to?”
“Can I get in trouble for my answers?” She bit her lip.
Vixen. Hammer didn’t know whether to shake his head or laugh.
“Only if you’re bratty or dishonest,” he quipped.
With a chuckle, Liam caressed her arm. “If you’re honest, you’ll earn nothing but praise. Answer my question.”
Her eyes slid shut and she winced. “Then, yes. I did.”
“Why?” Liam prodded.
She cracked an eye and looked Hammer’s way. She’d never once told him that his dinner was in the oven or that she’d changed his sheets. Just like he’d never openly thanked her. Instead, he’d had the oil changed in her car and left squares of her favorite chocolates where only she would find them. It had been their secret.
“How did you know?” she asked.
“I’m not blind,” Liam said. “Why?”
Raine took her time answering. A fist of anticipation gripped Hammer’s stomach and squeezed hard as she collected her thoughts and focused on Liam again.
“I’d taken care of him for so long, I didn’t know how not to. And, no offense…” She glanced at Hammer before redirecting back to Liam. “He’s pretty helpless in the kitchen. As long as I was cooking for us, it didn’t make sense to not make a little extra and leave it warm for him. The thought of him going hungry or eating takeout all the time bothered me. Ditto with the cleaning.”
“Thank you for being honest.” Liam grabbed a length of rope and attached her to the table again, this time binding her upper arms.
“Did that make you mad?” she asked, apprehension evident in her voice. “Because I never wanted to upset you. It wasn’t meant to.”
“What upsets me is that you did things for Hammer behind my back.” Liam tightened the binding. “You didn’t trust me enough to be honest.”
Raine nodded like she understood completely. “Somewhere during our last trip here, I become so attached to you that I was afraid to say anything that might drive you away. Me caring for Hammer wasn’t indicative of any disrespect or disloyalty to you. I just didn’t know how to say it.”
Liam peered down at her, his face tightening as if he repressed a hundred different thoughts. As if he wanted to wrap her up in his arms and never let go. “You just did, love.”
“And thank you for not letting me starve,” Hammer added, fastening his own rope around her opposite arm. “Focus on the silk, precious. Each is a line of trust between us. Feel it on your skin, in your blood, deep down.”
“I do,” she murmured as he tightened the knot.
Hammer couldn’t miss the arousal in her voice, and fuck, it turned him on.
“When did you first start thinking of Liam as something more than my friend?”
Raine’s eyes went wide. She pressed her lips together, then cut her gaze over to Liam. Hammer didn’t have to guess that she wasn’t keen on this question.
He tugged on the rope across her biceps. “Trust.”
Nodding, she blew out a breath. “When you first introduced us, I, um…thought he was very attractive. He asked a lot of probing questions during our first few conversations. He asked me about you. Then he asked me about me. I didn’t say much in either case. But I knew he was watching me a lot. I couldn’t figure out why exactly.” She let out a breath, then grasped for her fortitude. “The morning I broke the cup at your doorstep, the morning Marlie stepped from your room—”
“She was a mistake,” Hammer cut her off.
That made Raine smile. “She was a ‘see you next Tuesday.’”
“Excuse me?” Liam frowned, clearly confused.
“A cunt,” Hammer supplied. “C. U. Next… You get it.”
Liam burst out laughing. “That she was. Very clever, love.”
The new lightness in the room seemed to give her some confidence. “Anyway, Liam came to see me in the kitchen that morning and offered to train me. At first, I thought he just felt sorry for me. Then he kissed me. Then I knew he wanted me.”
Hammer flashed Liam a shocked glare, then with a grimace, he forced himself back on track. Water under the bridge. Ancient history. Not important right now—even if he wanted to give his old pal a piece of his mind.
As she watched him, uncertainty passed over her face. “Did I say something I shouldn’t have?”
“No, precious. You did well.” He wound another length of rope through the fastening in the table, then draped it over her shoulders.
Liam took the end and joined it on his side, pinning her down more. “Very honest, just as we asked for.”
Raine looked visibly relieved. “I’m trying.”
“We know,” Liam soothed. “Tell me why you think I uncollared you.”
“Well…I know you weren’t happy that I didn’t tell you about the migraine,” she began.
“Not happy at all.” Liam raised a brow. “But do you really think that’s why?”
“I didn’t say that,” she defended. “I knew it didn’t help, but…I guess I did a lot of things. I didn’t always tell you what was in my head.” Her gaze skittered away. “My only defense is that I’d never really had more than a one-sided relationship. I didn’t know how to believe you when you said you’d be there or that you cared.”
Hammer winced. Her words stung. Honesty was brutal, but he couldn’t hide from the truth. He’d kept her at arm’s length for years. From the moment she’d begun to blossom under his roof, he’d been scared fucking shitless at how much he cared. He’d wanted to protect her more than he had any other woman. At first, he’d told himself it was because she’d been so damn young and vulnerable.
Then Hammer thought his feelings had grown because he was determined to save her, since he hadn’t saved Juliet. Finally, he realized that he’d simply fallen for Raine.
Funny how he hadn’t figured out that he loved her or that she alone could heal him until Liam had stolen her away.
“Did you or did you not actively avoid conversations you’d find uncomfortable?” Liam asked.
“I did.” She sent him a sad, penitent stare. “But I didn’t mean to shut you out.”
Liam leaned over the table, his face turning foreboding. “You refused to tell me about your argument with Hammer just before Thanksgiving. You gave me some cockamamie story that it was about the menu.”
“We did talk about it,” she offered.
“That wasn’t what we argued about.” Hammer scowled.
She sighed in defeat. “I know.”
Liam grabbed her chin and redirected her. “So do I. And instead of being honest, what did you do?”
“I tried to be close to you. And you didn’t want my affection.” The hurt in her voice was unmistakable. Her lower lip trembled.
Hammer caught Liam’s gaze. His friend looked as confused as he felt.
“No,” Liam corrected. “You tried to end the conversation with sex. Frankly, that’s how you ended a lot of arguments.”
Fingers wrapped around the edge of the table, Hammer fought for his temper. Juliet had used that tactic on him so often. He’d fallen for it just about every fucking time, and look where that had led. He took in air between his teeth, resisting the urge to rail. But there was no goddamn way he would allow Raine to open her body to avoid doing the same with her heart.
Raine blinked. “You were angry, and I knew it, Liam. I wanted to soothe you. I needed your reassurance. Your touch is one way I could feel your caring.”
Really? That’s what she thought? Hammer released his grip on the table. He’d seen Juliet use her body to end conversations. But he’d never seen Raine use her wiles in that way. Sure, she’d tried to seduce him once, but he’d been dead asleep. She hadn’t wrapped her lips around his cock to stop a fight. When he’d all but fucked her in the bar, she hadn’t tried to stop the argument. In fact, she’d done her best to walk away. Maybe Liam had assumed that she’d meant to distract him and he’d mistaken her intent?
Maybe. But Hammer intended to make himself very clear either way. “Listen to me, Raine. You will never, ever use your body to sway either of us from asking you questions, prying you open, or digging in your head. If you need reassurance, you will ask for it, not lose your clothes and rub up against us. Is that crystal fucking clear? This is not up for negotiation.”
Raine stared, blinked, clearly confused. “Okay. I didn’t mean to distract Liam that day, just…” She sighed. “I can argue with you, and I know that no matter how angry you are, since it’s your club, you’re not going to leave. Besides, you like a good argument. Liam isn’t the same. He seemed genuinely upset, and I hated that.”
Hammer growled. “You think I enjoy arguing with you?”
She looked up at him as if the truth were obvious. “It’s your foreplay, and since we rarely did anything else… I mean, if you hadn’t liked it, you wouldn’t have picked so many fights.”
“You’re wrong.” Hammer all but lunged at her. “Picking a fight and pissing you off was the only way you’d stop protecting yourself and give me the truth.”
“And maybe I picked fights because it was the only way I could get you to pay attention to me.” She pursed her mouth and sent him a little frown. “I still think you liked arguing with me. It was difficult not to notice you were always hard.”
“That’s my constant state around you, fight or no.”
Liam cleared his throat. “So you didn’t mean to distract with sex. All right. But the truth is, you tried everything else to avoid telling me why you argued with Hammer.”
Then she cast those blue eyes back to Liam. “If I told you about the argument, I would’ve had to tell you how late my period was.”
“And you thought that if I knew I’d leave you, right?”
“Yes.”
“Even after I said I wouldn’t run out?”
“But you did,” she argued, tears filling her eyes.
“Am I standing here now?” he challenged. “Have I gone anywhere?”
She sighed. “No.”
“I uncollared you, love, not because I wanted to leave you, but because you were never truly with me.”
Raine fought against her bonds, straining to get off the table. Her legs flailed and she lurched up from the surface as much as her ropes allowed.
Hammer thrust a fist in her hair and tugged, jerking her face to his. “Stop. When you fight the ropes, Raine, you’re fighting us.”
“Don’t do this,” she sobbed.
“Don’t avoid our questions,” Hammer growled. “There’s no right or wrong answer, just the truth.”
She cut a glance to Liam, looking both accusing and hurt. “I told you. I tried. You expected more than I knew how to give. You scared me to death.”
Grabbing another length of rope, Hammer attached it to the table and tossed it over her hips, then thrust the other end at Liam. He took it grimly and tied it off at her other hip with a scowl.
“How did I do that?” Liam demanded incredulously, finishing the knot. “Because I loved you and I wanted you to love me back?”
“Yes.” Her entire body shook as she cried. “I didn’t know how I could be so afraid of something I wanted so badly. The fear paralyzed me.” She dragged in a jagged breath. “Every time I’d let go a little, I’d be so proud of myself. Then you always seemed angry that it wasn’t more. I felt so out of my element.”
“You shut down,” Hammer supplied.
Raine nodded.
“You never said any of this,” Liam pointed out softly. “How was I supposed to know?”
“How could I give you what I didn’t know how to give? Love seems so easy for you. The words just pour out. Me?” She shook her head. “What I knew was that if I wanted something too much, it would be taken and destroyed. You were so good. I wanted more. I didn’t dare tell you.”
“So you destroyed it yourself?”
She closed her eyes as sobs wracked her again. “See, I fuck everything up.”
Liam caressed her cheek. “Shh. No. Falling in love with you was so easy. From day one, I wanted to protect and guide you. I wanted to reach you. You made me laugh. You made me mad. You twisted me up in knots. But you made me feel alive. My vanity was believing my love was enough for us both. I never meant to make you feel unworthy.”
“I know you didn’t. I’m sorry I haven’t been honest. The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you.” Her lashes fluttered open and her gaze clung to Liam. Everything about her face was a plea for acceptance. “I love you.”
The air left Hammer’s lungs in a rush. It didn’t surprise him that Raine was in love with his best friend. Deep down, Hammer had known it, but hearing Raine’s sweet words wrapped in such earnest need… Fuck, he wanted to scream, rage, tear the room apart. But he couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move, couldn’t speak. Liam had waited for weeks, hoping she’d declare her feelings. Now that she had, Hammer just clenched his jaw, grateful the others were so engrossed in each other they didn’t notice he was quietly coming undone.
“Oh, god.” He cradled Raine’s face. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear that. Thank you for being brave. And here’s my heart, bound to yours.” Liam grabbed a stretch of rope and fitted it under her breasts before he handed it to Macen to complete.
Hammer stared at it mutely, seeing the overwhelming love in his friend’s eyes. With numb fingers, he took the silken length and wrapped it around the bolt on his side of the table as Liam bent to Raine and covered her mouth with his, delving deep, mastering her lips. Telling her without a single word that he loved her, too.
As Liam lifted away from Raine’s kiss, Hammer couldn’t do a damn thing except paste o
n a stoic expression.
Immediately, she looked his way, soft concern on her face. Yeah, she didn’t want to hurt him. Too late.
“How long have you been in love with him?” Hammer whispered.
Raine paused. He could see her thoughts turning, watch her scan memories.
“I think…” She smiled wryly. “When Liam fed me pickles. It was the most tender yet terrible way imaginable to tell me that what I said mattered.” She turned to Liam. “That night at dinner when you wanted to know about my childhood and finally persuaded me to tell you, do you remember? It was then.”
“I do. I made dessert out of you after that, love.” Liam grinned.
Raine blushed prettily, and they shared a memory Hammer knew he’d never precisely understand. It fed every insecurity he possessed. But he forced himself to swallow it down, along with his wounded pride.
“You’re doing so well, precious. He’s waited a long time to hear how you feel.” Hammer murmured to her.
How the hell could he be happy for his friend and so enraged at the same time?
“It doesn’t change the way I feel about you, Macen. Nothing ever would.” She glanced up at the ceiling and drew in a deep breath. “And that’s what I really didn’t know how to say, that I love you both.”
“I knew. I’ve known for a while. That’s hugely honest. You’re doing great,” Hammer choked out.
He grabbed some rope and handed Liam another piece. Together, they bent her knees, then secured the silk around her ankles and tied the lengths off to the table. Hammer checked her circulation along his side.
Liam did the same on the other with a shake of his head. “You might have told me, mate.”
“I tried, you stubborn fuck. You weren’t listening.” Hammer turned serious again and pinned her with a stare. “One more thing stumps me, Raine. I understand why you felt you couldn’t talk to Liam after he uncollared you. Why didn’t you come to me?”
“And say what? I couldn’t ask you to fix my boo-boo, Macen. I worried that if I went to see you that we’d…” She closed her eyes, looking tense and uncomfortable. “Fall into bed, and that I wouldn’t have the strength to say no. Then you both would have thought I’d chased you down for revenge sex. It’s even an ugly thought, and I didn’t want that.”
