by Shayla Black
“What? A fake friendship with a man who’s kept me in the dark about everyone and everything that ever mattered? Thanks, but no thanks, Hammer. You’ve shown me your true colors and they’re uglier than fuck.”
“I’m not talking about me, asswipe. I meant Raine. She loves you.”
“Oh, so you’re suddenly concerned about salvaging my relationship with Raine? This from the man who bragged just days ago that he’d get her back in bed. Isn’t that just your way?”
“And what’s your way, Liam? Ripping the collar from her throat and shoving her out the fucking door? You’re goddamn lucky we found her because I would have killed you if she’d left me for good.”
“Left you, is it? She’s mine!” Liam growled.
“Not now, dumbass.” Hammer smirked.
“That’s enough, you two,” Seth barked.
“Shut the fuck up,” Liam snarled at Seth before glancing over the man’s shoulder to pin his anger on Hammer once again. “You know, I tried hard to forgive you from keeping secrets from me. I even managed to feel sorry for you. After Thanksgiving, I’d hoped you’d gotten over your shit so we could finally put our differences to rest. But no. You buried the only worthwhile pieces of yourself with Juliet.”
“Stop!” Beck roared, sidling next to Seth. “Sit the fuck down, you two.”
“Butt out.” Hammer scowled at the other two Doms before he turned back to Liam. “You leave Juliet out of this.”
“How can I? You can’t let it go. Instead of dealing with your guilt, you’ve hurt me. You’ve hurt Raine. And you don’t give a bloody fuck.”
Liam couldn’t miss the flash of pain in Hammer’s eyes. Good! The bastard needed to feel how much it hurt to have his heart ripped from his damn chest—exactly the way Liam had.
“This is about your sorry ass. Don’t pin this on me. I thought you’d be a man about helping Raine grow. But obviously you’d rather shit in your diaper than pull your head out of your ass.” Hammer leveled him a glare of contempt.
“Take off your rose-colored glasses, Macen. Did you honestly think the three of us were going to set up house and live happily ever after just because you had a boner to do it ten years ago? Hate to burst your bubble, mate. But when we leave here, Raine will be mine again,” he blustered, knowing he had no way to make that hope a reality.
“Over my dead body,” Hammer fumed.
“For fuck’s sake. Shut. Up,” Beck howled as he glanced toward the stairs.
Liam turned.
There stood Raine. Dressed in jeans and a dark sweater, she clutched her suitcase as tears streamed down her face.
“Fuck,” Hammer groaned in regret.
Swiping a careless hand across her cheeks, Raine burned them both with a stare steeped in pain. She took Liam’s knees out from under him. His heart clutched, and a wave of dread tingled through his limbs.
As he and Hammer both started toward her, Raine pinned them with a scathing glare, shaking her head and halting them in their tracks. Liam longed to scoop her into his arms, hold her tight, and tell her he was sorry for breaking his vow.
As she descended the stairs, she gave off a near-palpable blast of arctic air that rattled his bones. He could almost feel her reconstructing her walls, building them tight and impenetrable. His guts seized. All the progress they’d made was now destroyed because he and Hammer hadn’t kept a lid on their shit.
“I agreed to do this with you both under one condition,” she spit out through clenched teeth. “Just one!”
The agony in her voice slammed Liam with guilt.
Hammer tried to take another step closer. “Raine, listen. We—”
“Shut up!” she snapped as she seared him with a fierce scowl. “Don’t you dare come near me.”
For once, Hammer was stunned silent.
“I let you both bring me here so I could try and fix myself, to finally have a fucking happy life. And I’d almost been convinced that my dreams would come true. But Liam just admitted that you two can’t share me. How naïve I was to think you could.” Raine’s voice cracked on a gut-wrenching sob. “Even knowing that it didn’t work with Juliet, I fooled myself into believing it would be different with me—that we were different. I bought into the fantasy.” She looked at Beck. “Didn’t you tell me to grow up earlier? You couldn’t have been more right.”
Liam shook his head. No. No. “It can work, love, if—”
“Don’t you talk to me, either,” Raine choked. “I appreciate all the ways you both helped me. But I thought that today’s task about honesty would run both ways. I see now it was a stunt. While I was ripping my heart open, you two were beating your chests over which of you got to slide into my panties again. Whatever. I thought you two were everything I ever wanted. But I finally understand that you’re both so fucking broken, I’m not sure you’ll ever be what I need.”
“Bullshit!” Hammer growled.
Raine’s words utterly demolished Liam. Her truth about the baby earlier today hadn’t cut his soul as wide open as her words now. Even walking in on Gwyneth’s adulterous ménage hadn’t charred him this completely. He had to make this up to Raine. But first, he had to force her to hear his apology and pray she accepted it.
“Wait a minute, Raine,” Seth interjected as he moved alongside Liam.
She shook her head. “There’s no point. I can do a lot of things, Seth. But I can’t continue to love two men who don’t love me enough to keep one promise.”
“That’s not fair, precious,” Hammer implored, his voice broken.
Liam turned to stare at the man. Macen looked pasty and shaken. He’d never seen Hammer so afraid.
“Don’t start, Macen.” She wagged a finger at him. “You don’t know the first thing about fair.”
“Raine…” Liam started, not sure what to say—what he could say—to make her listen.
She shook her head, looking right through him and Hammer as if they weren’t there, and held back a sob as she turned to Beck.
“Forgive me, love. I’m sorry for everything.” The inevitable loss threatened to crush Liam.
“Get me off this fucking mountain,” she choked. “Now.”
“No!” Hammer barked, leveling a frantic gaze at the tattooed Dom.
“Raine,” Beck soothed as he wedged between Hammer and Liam before closing in next to her. “Let’s talk about this for a minute.”
“I’m done.” He’d never seen more resolution on her face.
“You promised you wouldn’t run away again,” Hammer reminded her.
“You’re going to talk to me about broken promises?” she challenged. “Your turn to choke on disappointment. Can we go, Beck?”
Glancing over his shoulder, the tattooed Dom grimaced in apology to both Liam and Hammer before wrapping an arm around her waist. “Come on, princess.”
Helpless and wrought with contrition, Liam watched as Beck led her toward the door. Hammer took a step forward, then stopped.
“Fuck.” Macen scrubbed a hand down his face. “This can’t be happening. Precious…”
Liam strode toward her. “Stop, love. Let’s talk—”
She opened the door and didn’t turn back.
“Wait!” Hammer screamed at the top of his lungs. “Don’t leave. I love you!”
She froze, dead in her tracks.
The entire room stood still.
Slowly, Raine turned, focused solely on Macen as her chin trembled. A mournful sob escaped her lips. Beck seemed to support her dissolving frame.
Liam gaped at Hammer in stunned silence. And what he saw made his eyes burn. Macen’s face was etched in pain while he watched helplessly as the woman they both loved stood ready to walk out the door. She’d wrenched Hammer’s heart open. A trail of tears wet his harsh cheeks.
Raine’s face twisted as her brows drew together. “Goddamn you, Macen. You wait until I’m ready to leave to tell me? Or are you just saying anything to make me stay?” She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter anymore. I
wish this had turned out differently.”
Raine stormed out, slamming the door with a thunderous boom.
“I’ll do what I can for you, dumb fucks, but I’m not making any promises.” Beck sighed in disgust before he opened the door and followed Raine out into the night.
#
Hammer closed his eyes and palmed the tears from his cheeks. The second Raine walked out, she’d shredded his heart. For years, he’d wanted to declare his love. He’d never imagined that she’d believe his admission had been a disingenuous ploy and reject him. He might not have been the best at showing her how he felt, but he knew what love meant because of her. For Raine, he’d always cared and been concerned in a way he hadn’t for anyone else.
But you haven’t always put her needs first.
“Fuuccckkk!” Liam roared. “She’s gone again. Bloody hell!”
“Calm down, you two. Let’s talk,” Seth ordered with a scowl.
“I think we’ve said more than enough, don’t you?” Liam mocked.
“What’s talking going to solve?” Hammer sounded at the end of his rope. “In case you missed it, she left us.”
Seth just shook his head. “So you’re going to stand there like whipped puppies and take it? Beck will reason with her, but if you want her back, we need to iron this out.”
Liam scoffed. “I don’t see how.”
“You two are friends, remember?” Seth arched a brow. “Friends fight, like you just did. Now it’s time to move on.”
Hammer narrowed his eyes. “Are you fucking blind?”
“No, but you two are. Raine needs time to cool down. Then Beck will bring her back, and you clowns need to be ready when she gets here. You have an hour, maybe two, to lick your wounds and practice groveling. With your egos, neither one of you have a minute to waste.”
“I doubt that’s enough time to patch everything up,” Liam muttered. “I’m not sure a decade would be.”
Hammer saw the accusation in Liam’s eyes, and it pissed him off all over again. “Probably not. If you’d just get over your jealousy—”
“You’re blaming me for Raine leaving? I was fine until you started baiting me. If you’d kept your bloody mouth shut, we wouldn’t be in this fucking mess.”
“Oh, you’ve got some big fucking balls. In case you didn’t notice, we both had to hear some goddamn hard truths today. Imagine my surprise to discover that you were sucking face with Raine when I told you to keep your hands off her. But then we both know the real reason you hooked up with her in the first place, don’t we?” Hammer could feel his blood pressure rising.
“Because you weren’t giving her what she needed,” Liam tossed back.
“Because you wanted to yank my chain.” Hammer shoved a finger in his face.
“For the record, I was trying to help someone I cared about, you bloody wanker.”
“Yeah, so you could see if I’d get jealous. And if not, well, why not just get in her pants? After that, do you think I enjoyed hearing her tell you that she loved you? That was a Hallmark moment I could have lived without.”
Liam rolled his eyes. “Oh, I’ve had a bloody party listening to her tell you she loves you for the last month! All that time, I’ve had to hear your insufferable whining about how I stole her from you.”
“Shit. I finally get the courage to tell her I love her, do I get sweet kisses and cuddles? No, she thinks I’m fucking lying.”
“What the fuck did you expect? You wait until she’s running out the goddamn door. Face it, Macen. You’re an idiot. Why didn’t you tell her in the bedroom this morning when you had her alone? That’s when she needed to hear it. And she might have let you fuck her, too.”
“You’re right. I was an idiot. Silly me for trying to honor our pact. So much for our strong, coordinated effort. Remember, she wasn’t supposed to be yours or mine? Or did you have a secret agenda in mind all along?”
“You’ve lost the plot, mate.” Liam shook his head in disgust.
“Jesus, you two.” Seth sighed as he opened the door. “Let’s get this out of the way before we go any further. You have five minutes outside to beat the fuck out of each other. Get it out of your system. When you come back, your heads up north better be ready to take charge.”
“With pleasure.” Liam stomped toward the door, shucking his jacket, tie, and shirt before tossing them onto the chair. “Are you coming, old man? Or are you afraid?”
With a glare Liam’s way, Hammer stood and tore off everything he wore above the waist, unceremoniously dumping them onto the same chair, then he barreled toward the door. He stopped as he passed by Seth. “You’re buying me a new pair of Louis Vuitton loafers, asshole.”
The other man just laughed as he slipped on his coat.
Stepping off the porch, Hammer sunk to his shins in the thick snow. He suddenly realized he should have told Seth that he’d need to replace his Armani trousers, too.
Liam hopped in the snow, his breath making clouds in the frigid air, fists pumping like a boxer’s. Hammer wanted to laugh, but the rancor glowing in O’Neill’s eyes told him this wouldn’t be a polite spar.
Before Hammer could get his footing in the slick, fine powder, Liam bounced in close and caught Macen’s jaw with a right hook. His head snapped back. A low growl tore from his throat.
“It’s on, asswipe,” Hammer bellowed.
Crouching low, he slammed a shoulder into Liam’s midsection. A grunt exploded from Liam’s throat, filling Hammer with satisfaction and sending the two men tumbling to the frigid snow.
Liam hissed as the frozen precipitation hit his bare back. Hammer snarled and straddled O’Neill’s chest, then hauled back a fist.
From the stoop, Seth stood wrapped in a woolen coat, rocking back on his heels and shaking his head.
Hammer ignored him and watched as Liam struggled to sit up. He launched his fist straight at Liam’s nose, making contact with a satisfying crunch. Blood sprayed in a perfect arc, landing on the Irishman’s chest and chin.
“You ready to give up yet?” Hammer baited.
“Concede to you, you fucking bastard?” the other man scoffed. “In your dreams.”
They panted heavily, and Liam struggled to push Macen off, then gave up with a curse. Instead, the man wiped at his nose, then reared back and punched him in the stomach. The air left Hammer’s lungs in a rush, and he felt faintly nauseous—and not for anything would he admit it.
“What are you doing, O’Neill? Trying to tickle me?” Hammer taunted before connecting another shot to Liam’s cheek.
“Get the hell off me. Christ, I can’t breathe with your weight on my gut,” Liam grunted as he twisted his body and heaved upright, unseating Hammer and tossing him onto his back. Rising to his knees, Liam hovered over him and plowed his fist into Macen’s nose. Pain exploded in his skull.
Hammer managed to grit his teeth and hold it together, even as blood ran into his mouth. “Stop hitting me with your purse.”
“You fight like a fucking girl. Planning to scratch me next?” Liam goaded before driving his fist into Hammer’s gut.
Macen groaned but managed to give Liam a mighty shove and send him tumbling.
Sprawled out in the snow side by side, the two men panted as they stared up into the twinkling night sky. The freezing temperature cooled his temper. Hammer realized he didn’t want to kill Liam, simply vent the years of pent-up fury once and for all. His nose hurt. His stomach felt sore. He spit out a mouthful of blood. His only consolation was that he didn’t think Liam had fared any better.
“Had enough of me kicking your ass, gramps?” Liam quipped.
“Fuck off,” Hammer turned to scowl at his friend.
Blood still seeped from his nose, but Liam grinned at him like a loon. In that moment, he prayed his friend only wanted to blow off steam, too. They’d taken their argument—hell, themselves—far too seriously.
This was what they should have done after Juliet’s suicide. Yell. Fight. Get fucking drunk. And cry.
Macen had done all that alone and resented Liam for it. He knew now that his old friend would have happily joined him, if he’d only asked.
“I can go again. Just give me a minute. I need to catch my breath,” Hammer groaned.
A hint of smugness resounded in Liam’s low laughter until he palmed his jaw and cursed.
“Time’s up, ladies. Let’s go back inside. We can sit by the fire, hold hands, and sing Kumbaya,” Seth called from the front porch.
“Fucker,” Hammer muttered.
“I think we should beat his ass next,” Liam murmured conspiratorially.
Both men cracked a knowing grin. As if they’d read one another’s minds, they raised their right arms and flipped Seth off, laughing. It felt good.
Liam stumbled to his feet and held out his hand to Hammer. “Come on, you old fart. Let me help you up.”
“Who are you calling old? If our mommy over there on the porch—” Hammer thumbed in Seth’s direction “—had given us five more minutes, I’d have kicked your ass.”
Liam dropped his hand. “Yeah? Who’s on their feet first?” He grinned. “Or should I just let you drag your own half-dead carcass up alone.”
“Hey, I didn’t say I was turning down your help.” As Liam held out his hand again, Hammer laughed and latched on, rising to his feet.
Seth waited for them on the porch with a sour expression. “You two look like you fell face first into a meat grinder. When Raine comes back, she won’t like looking at either of you.”
“We’ll turn off the lights. She doesn’t need to see us, anyway. Just feel.” Hammer smirked.
“Or Beck and I could just take her off your hands,” Seth teased.
“You wanna die?” Hammer asked.
Liam suggested something anatomically impossible as they marched inside, grabbed their dry clothes, then hurried to the fireplace.
The heat felt good on Hammer’s stinging skin. Using his shirt to wipe away the blood that dripped from his nose, he eyed Liam. Would they be able to salvage their friendship and love Raine together? He wasn’t sure, but Raine blurting out her fantasy—her hope—had sharpened his. He wanted her. But he wanted her with Liam, with the best friend who’d tried to stand by him through thick and thin. Hammer might not always agree with Liam’s choices, but he knew the man never had less than good intentions. It was a place to start.
