Called Up

by Jen Doyle

  Oh, how she wanted to scream.

  “I...” she gasped, feeling Dorie’s arms go around her and pull her into a hug. “I can’t...”

  Breathe. She couldn’t breathe.

  Before she knew what was happening, she was being propelled through the back hallway.

  One minute she was standing there watching Peggy yell at Lola, and the next she was in the alley behind Deke’s bar.

  “Oh, God.”

  Tears spilled out of her eyes and she didn’t know why. She expected nothing from him. She expected nothing, period. No one to answer to, no one to make promises he wouldn’t be able to keep, no one to count on other than her own reliable self.

  And then, suddenly, all the feelings she hadn’t been able to feel came to her in an all-consuming roar. Her heart started pounding, her lungs burned and the scream she couldn’t get out filled her head. She was trembling—sobbing—and still completely unable to breathe.

  “It’s okay, sweetie,” Dorie was murmuring in her ear. “It’s going to be okay.”

  No, it wasn’t. Nothing was going to be okay.

  She wished she were different. That she’d grown up the way everyone else had—fighting with her mom. Hating her dad for giving her a curfew. Complaining that the dinner wasn’t what she wanted, that her clothes were all wrong, that...

  She wanted her mother, goddamn it. Her dad. She wanted her family back.

  She wanted all the things that could never be.

  She felt her legs buckle beneath her, felt her body curl into itself. Felt the light she’d had for such a short while fade to black.

  “What the hell happened?” she heard Nate ask and then a murmured response as Dorie answered.

  Completely unable to deal with any of it, she rested her head against something solid, realizing belatedly it was Nate’s chest, and that he’d picked her up off the stairs outside Dorie’s apartment, where she’d apparently come to a stop before sinking down to the floor.

  She remembered even less after that. There was the sense of dark clouds whirling around her, of falling through space, of fear and chaos and an overwhelming roar as everything around her was shaken and tossed. When her eyes snapped open, she saw her father sitting there, across the room, smiling and looking down at her mom with such tenderness that she felt her whole being swell with joy as she woke up from the horrible nightmare of...

  Yes, she’d fallen asleep, but this wasn’t a nightmare she could wake out of. There had been a tornado. It had taken them away. And that wasn’t her father in front of her, it was...

  Nate’s head snapped up. Smile gone, he pulled away from Dorie. “You’re awake. What the hell did Deke—”

  “Oh, my God.” Mama Gin was right. Nate looked exactly like their father. How had she never seen it before, not once, in all these years?

  Maybe because she’d never allowed herself to remember the way their father had looked at her mother, the same way Nate looked at Dorie. Because they had been in love. What he’d done had been horrible enough for Fitz to not be able to get past it. Before all that, though. Before she’d become part of the scandal he’d created, what was there between her parents had been strong enough for them to face whatever lay ahead of them. Together.

  And Fitz’s heart broke all over again. For all this time, she’d refused to even consider the possibility of falling in love. The idea of what it meant both to have and to lose something so utterly profound had scared her too much. So she’d used her anger as an excuse to play it safe, to sit there in her comfort zone while Deke took a running jump straight off the edge of the cliff.

  For her.

  She looked up to see Nate still watching her, his eyes cold and his lips settled into a grim line. His voice tight with anger, he repeated, “What did Deke do?”

  With his hands at his side and his eyes radiating fury, Fitz was afraid he might kill Deke. Maim him, at the very least.

  Dorie was clearly also ready to lay into Deke, although she had a much softer touch. Coming over to the couch and putting her arm around Fitz, she said, “It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it, we—”

  Her gaze flew up to Nate’s as he cut her off, saying, “I want to talk about it,” fists clenching. “As soon as I can find him, at least.”

  Fitz leaned forward, a tiny bit of panic flaring up as she looked out the window at the sky that seemed ominously darker than it had only a moment before. “He’s not at the bar?”

  The grim look came over Nate’s face again as Dorie frowned and said, “He apparently decided to go fishing.”

  Fishing? Images from her dream came rushing back. The helplessness of being caught in the storm. “Call Lola,” she demanded, the fear taking over.

  With an apologetic look, Dorie shook her head. “Lola says there must have been some kind of misunderstanding because, I quote, ‘Deke and Fitz are totally in love,’ end quote, and that the two of you need to figure this out.”

  The sob rose up through Fitz’s chest so quickly that she had to gulp in air in order to breathe. And gulp it in again.

  Yes, she should have told him about the job. She knew that. But she hadn’t been ready for anything to happen the way it did. Not the job, and definitely not him. “He... He changed the rules.” They would have been fine if it had all stayed the way it was supposed to. “It was...” She buried her head in her hands; there was no way she could meet Dorie’s eyes, much less Nate’s. “It was just supposed to be...”

  Before she could muster up the courage to say the word, however, Dorie made a sound that was half gasp, half laugh, while Nate sighed. When Fitz looked up, she could see he’d put his hand to his forehead and had his eyes closed. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he said, “If the ending to that fucking phrase is ‘sex,’ I am seriously going to...”

  Dorie snorted as his voice trailed off and he glared at her. Fitz was obviously missing something, but she wasn’t about to interrupt.

  “And I suddenly find myself in Deke’s corner,” he muttered.

  “Oh, honey,” Dorie said, pulling Fitz into a hug. “It will all work out. I honestly believe that.”

  Well, of course Dorie believed. Dorie had a man who worshipped the ground—

  “Did you hear that?” Dorie asked, cocking her head at the sound of sirens in the distance.

  “Shit,” Nate muttered, going for the remote and turning on the TV.

  “My phone,” Fitz snapped, jumping to her feet. “Where is it?”

  “We turned them off...” Dorie’s mouth dropped open as she stared at the image on the TV. The one showing a map with Inspiration in the middle of it and flashing red all around it.

  Shutting off the TV, Nate was already in motion, grabbing Dorie’s hand and pulling her from the couch. “We need to go.”

  Right. Because for some ridiculous reason, over half the buildings in town didn’t have basements even though they lived in freaking tornado alley. And although almost all of the buildings in town had been damaged by the last tornado, not nearly enough of them had been bad enough to require rebuilding from the ground up. Deacon’s was one of the few in this part of town with a basement because they’d run a bar there during Prohibition.

  But Fitz couldn’t move. Standing there staring at the TV, the map was imprinted on her mind even though the TV was now off. If he’d really gone fishing, then he was right there in the middle of all that red.

  “Goddamn it, Fitz,” Nate yelled from the doorway. “Come on!”

  She ran out after them, down the stairs and out onto the street. She even turned to run toward the bar right along with Nate and Dorie and every other person who had any sense, when the sight of the sky stopped her cold. It wasn’t the way she remembered it. She’d always had a picture in her head of a disaster movie-type funnel cloud, but the reality was that she’d never seen
it. She’d been so scared she’d just huddled in the backseat, her eyes squeezed shut as the winds battered the car.

  This could barely even be called a cloud, it was that big. Still in the distance, but huge and pitch black as it crowded the color out of the sky. She honestly wouldn’t have been surprised if a cow came flying across the road.

  Yes, she had screwed things up. Yes, she was the one who’d come close to destroying the best thing she’d ever have. But you want faith, Deke? Here you go. Angelica Hawkins is fighting her way back to you no matter what stands in the way.

  Even if it was a tornado. A big one.

  But what-the-fuck-ever.

  She ran across the street to where Nate’s car was parked, because, yes, thank you, God, he kept his keys tucked in the visor. It drove Dorie crazy.

  She got in and powered it up and... Holy cow that was a lot of engine.

  Well, good.

  You know what, Universe? No.

  No. Freaking. Way.

  Chapter Thirty

  Two hours after leaving the bar, Deke found himself still sitting in his Jeep, staring out over the creek. He had no idea what he’d been thinking. He wasn’t fishing, that was for damn sure. It had been raining all day and the temperature had dropped about twenty degrees in the last hour alone, plus the thunderstorm that had just started was making it clear this was not the best day to be out here. But he was at a complete loss as to what to do.

  He couldn’t go back to the bar right now. He had no interest in seeing another living soul, to be honest. Hell, the way he was feeling right now, he could see himself getting back on the road and driving right up Highway 35 until Inspiration was so far behind him that it wasn’t even a speck on a map. The rest of the world be damned.

  Keeping what had happened to her in high school a secret, yeah, he got that. He even understood why she’d wanted to keep what they’d been doing from everyone else—he couldn’t imagine facing either Nate or Dorie right now, much less Wash or Jason once they heard the whole story.

  At the same time, though, he was...pissed. How long had she known she was up for this job? How long since she’d decided to leave? He let his head fall back against the seat. Doesn’t need to be complicated, my ass. What a fucking idiot he’d been.

  Damn it, Fitz. Give me something.

  Of course he’d fallen in love with her. How could he have expected anything else? But she was also the most infuriating creature on the face of this earth. She’d pushed him right up and over the breaking point. Hell, up until today he hadn’t even known he had a breaking point. But there it was. If only he didn’t love her so much. If only he didn’t want to see her happy, honest-to-God happy, for once in her life.

  Yeah. If only. Things would be a hell of a lot easier, that was for fucking sure.

  He was so lost in his own thoughts, and okay, maybe he was blasting AC/DC as loud as his speakers could go, that it took him a minute or two before he heard it.

  He turned the music down for a second and...

  Fuck. Tornado sirens. He leaned forward in order to see more of the sky as he powered his phone back on. It practically blew out of his hand the second it came to life. There were no less than five tornado watch alerts, and another came up right then, except this one was a warning. Which meant there wasn’t a chance of a tornado, there was one. If the sudden influx of voicemails and texts meant anything, it was that it was heading right toward Inspiration.

  Although the last thing he should do was get back on the road, he threw the Jeep into gear and backed out of the brush faster than a bat could work its way out of hell. Two seconds later he was barreling down the highway into town, watching the huge black cloud off in the distance, the sky pea soup green all around him. There was no way he was stopping until he had Fitz in his arms. She may not be in love with him—she may not ever have the capacity to be—but no matter how fucked up things were right now, he cared more deeply for her than anyone he’d ever known. There was no way he was letting her ride this out alone.

  He glanced up to his left, pausing for a split second as the power of what he saw registered. It was still out over the fields, a massive wedge of a cloud ready to unleash its fury. Tendrils dropped down out of it, swirling along the ground. He’d never actually been in a tornado. He and Lola had been up in Ames with their grandparents when the one that destroyed the town hit seventeen years before and, to be honest, it was mesmerizing. From this far away, at least. But it wasn’t exactly the time to be in awe of Mother Nature. He slammed his foot down on the gas, cranking it up to ninety.

  The streets were deserted by the time he got into town, an apocalyptic scene with cars pulled haphazardly to the sides of the road as their occupants escaped to the nearest shelter. When he turned off the main road and towards the town center, right there on the sidewalk were Nate and Dorie, standing and arguing, despite it seriously not being the time for that. Nate looked like he was restraining Dorie so she couldn’t turn back. Deke pulled up next to them and leaned out the window.

  Without even a word of hello, Nate said, “We were at Dorie’s when the sirens went off. Fitz was right there with us. I have no fucking clue where she went.”

  There wasn’t even time to wonder. Deke nodded, ready to move forward again.

  “We’ll help you find her,” Dorie said—well, shouted, in order to be heard.

  Hell, no. Fitz would kill them all if something happened to Dorie. Deke looked at Nate. “I’ve got this.”

  To his complete surprise, Nate didn’t even attempt to fight him on it. Instead, he nodded before turning back to Dorie and saying, “We’re going to the bar. You’re either walking on your own or I’m carrying you.”

  Deke didn’t even look to see which way Dorie chose. He floored the gas.

  Those last few blocks were the longest trip Deke had ever taken in his life. He didn’t have time to go slow and he had to pay extra close attention to driving, but he did his damnedest to keep his eyes out for Fitz along the way. She had to be somewhere close by, and one glance in the rearview mirror was enough to tell Deke he was running out of time. He screeched around the corner onto Dorie’s street...

  And came to a sudden halt.

  If not for the particular circumstances it would have been comical to watch Fitz wrestle with Nate’s Mustang as it bucked back and forth. She was actually attempting to maneuver out of a parking spot without hitting the cars to her front or back.

  During a tornado.

  He pulled to the side of the road and jumped out of his Jeep, his eye on what now seemed like a much more rapidly approaching cloud. He got to the Mustang and was about to wrench the door open when she looked up and smiled.

  Smiled. And waved.

  No fear, not even anger. She just got out of the car and said, “Oh, good.”

  He truly was delusional. Good?

  “Are you out of your fucking mind?”

  She looked up at him. “I didn’t think it would be that hard to drive a stick.”

  What?

  Then she looked past him, her hand over her eyes as the wind whipped her hair around.

  “Oh,” she said, taking a step back. Her eyes widened. “Oh, wow.”

  He looked over his shoulder to see the cloud was a lot fucking closer. And its tendrils had joined together into a funnel that was now zig-zagging its way toward town. There was the roar of a train, and then the rat-a-tat-tat of machine gun fire as the hail began to fall. Big freaking balls of hail. And they hurt.

  He grabbed her hand and they ran toward the building. They were only twenty feet away from the door leading up to Dorie’s apartment, thank God, because even that seemed too far away. The stairway had only a few small windows along the ceiling, but the hail was so loud Deke was sure it was strong enough to break the glass. The apartment door was wide open. He pushed Fit
z ahead of him into the living room when the drop of pressure made his head feel like it was going to explode and the sound of the loudest train whistle he’d ever heard suddenly seemed about ten times louder.

  So this was what it was like to be in the middle of a tornado. Holy freaking fuck.

  With a burst of speed he didn’t know she had in her, Fitz ran straight back to the bathroom while Deke detoured to the bedroom to pull the mattress off the bed. He was right behind, jumping into the bathtub after her, pulling the mattress over them just as the windows blew out. And then he clung with all his might, his arms straining as he fought the wind, as she curled into him and buried her head against his chest.

  Afraid that it all might be too much for Fitz, he chanced a look down at her. She didn’t seem even the least bit scared. Just kind of...calm. Serene.

  “What the fuck were you doing out there?” he asked at one point.

  “Coming for you,” she answered.

  “That was, uh...” How to put it best? “...fucking crazy.”

  “It’s called faith, Deke,” she said, a smile on her face as she tucked her head into his neck.

  She was clearly in shock.

  Even if they made it through this it was, without doubt, the end. Of course she was going to take that job—after Mother Nature’s repeat performance, she might not even come back to visit.

  Deke would figure out a way to live with it, though. Eventually. Right now, buffeted by the wind and knowing he was the only one standing—well, lying in a tub while holding the mattress over the top of them—between Fitz and a tornado, he decided he could do all his figuring out later. He’d found her. That was enough for now.

  * * *

  Fitz took a sledgehammer to a lot of walls as she lay there in Deke’s arms.

  She loved him.

  It wasn’t just the lover he was, coaxing her body into bliss, night after night, or the friend he’d been to her for over half her life, nor was it the brother he was to Lola, the uncle he was to every kid in the Deacon and Hawkins clan. It was the man he was—the man who had changed because of her, but refused to be fully broken in order to keep her. Refused to let her break him.