Your Husband My Trick

by Solae Dehvine

  “I can’t believe this shit.”

  “Please sis.”

  “You gonna act right. You can’t be just talking. You know how I roll and you just…”

  “I know, I know...I’m sorry, I just thought that...from earlier and…”

  “Don ain’t the only dick in Houston. That’s how you in the shit you in now. You don’t think.”

  If I didn’t need her help I would have cursed her the fuck out but I bit my tongue.

  “Don’t you make me regret this.” I heard her say. She took a deep breath and said the words I was praying for. “I'll send you a ticket. But you better be on your best fucking behavior.”

  “You won’t regret it...I promise.”

  “BITCH YOU GOT ONE MORE MINUTE BEFORE I SHOOT.” Shoot? That was my cue to run. I wasn’t about to stay and fight this war.

  “Look...I’m down...I’ll do whatever you want.” Now it was time to run. I opened the back door not caring about the noise it could make.

  “When do you want to come?”

  “Right now...asap.” Taking the back steps two at a time with heavy ass suitcases and a laptop bag and my purse around my neck, but I didn’t stop until I was outside in the night air.

  “Aight then. I’ll go ahead and buy the ticket. Don’t play me like before.” Lark gave me a warning. She was talking about old news, a situation that occurred so long ago I barely remembered what happened.

  “Okay okay...email it to me…Sis. Thank you so much, I promise I’m not going to play you.” I was going to request a certain airline when my ear drums exploded with the loudest sound I’ve ever heard. It came from upstairs in my apartment that now sounded like a war zone. “I gotta go Lark. Send it now!” I hung up on her, grabbed all of my things, and ran like a track star. Bags heavy and flapping against my body as I ran, but I didn’t stop until I made it up the aisle to the lights and cars of Peachtree Street.

  People were everywhere, spilling out of bars, but I needed an escape. On the corner was a cab like it was sitting and waiting for me. This had to be fate, the blessing I needed.

  “CAB...CAB” I screamed running to him. “Airport...please.” I threw the bags inside, jumping in the car within seconds.

  “I’m in a hurry...please.” Looking behind me I searched for her. Her beady eyes and wild hair, I looked and looked but she wasn’t there.

  “Alright…” The old cabbie pulled away from the curb so recklessly that he almost hit a car, swerving and speeding into traffic. I kept my head on a swivel for anything. God please let me live.

  “Airport?” He repeated as If I had changed my mind in the last minute.

  “Yes. The airport please. Hurry!”

  This was all Nick’s fault. He was just another guy now that had to return to his wife and family while I’m on to the next. We had some good times together, taking trips, making love for hours in exotic places around the city. He was good at spoiling me and taking me to Lenox Mall to shop. Yet all of that dissolved away when his wife showed up to put a bullet in me. It was all the same in Atlanta, a group of men pretending to be something that they are not.

  “What airline?” Snapping back to reality I saw the lights of Hartsfield Jackson Airport up ahead.

  “Ummm...Hold on.” I checked my phone and sure enough in my email was a plane ticket.

  “American...American...” My sister actually came through, I expected her to flake on me and leave me high and dry but it was right here in my hand. A one way ticket to Houston, Texas courtesy of my sister.

  “Twenty dollars please.” Everything was expensive in Atlanta, even the damn cabs. Swiping my card in the back seat I ran a calculation of how much money I had left. I now had one hundred and eighty dollars to my name to survive.

  I went from lounging in my lingerie to running to the airport. But this is the life of a boss bitch and the first thing I do when I get to Houston is get my business back up and going.

  Standing in line I inched closer and closer to the counter. The longer I stayed here the more secure I felt.

  The bitch wouldn’t come into an airport shooting...would she? It was a good question that I hoped I wouldn’t need to answer.

  “Next.” The woman behind the counter yelled. She wore wide glasses that covered nearly half her face. I said a silent prayer hoping I wouldn’t have any trouble.

  “Hi, can I have your ID and reservation number please?” She smiled big. So far so good.

  I handed it all over.

  “Reservation number is HBI92O.” I gave her a smile, but her expression changed as she looked over my information. She looked back and forth from the ID to my face, then back again.

  “Ummm...this flight doesn’t leave until the morning. About ten hours or so.” As if I couldn’t read the time.

  “That’s fine. I’m early.” I laughed but she didn’t share the joke, instead her mouth was straight as a line.

  “And this ID is for Fennis Smith. Where is your identification?” Here we go, just when I thought life was getting better. “It says here that you are a man...a male and…”

  “And...I got titties, a bomb wig, and fingernails.” I flicked the Swarovski crystal encrusted stiletto nails in her face. Her eyes got big as saucers.

  “Oh oh… so you're trans...trans…” She sounded like the word was caught in her throat and she couldn’t get it out.

  “Let me help you hunny…” I smacked my lips like the real dick beaters they were. “I am Transgender hunny.” I kept my voice high so everyone could hear me but my eyes were directly on her. “Are you surprised because I look better than most of the raggedy bitches in here? Is this some kind of discrimination? Is this going to be a problem?” I wasn’t ashamed of who I was. Hell I looked better than half the bitches with pussies anyway.

  “Umm no…” I could tell it was by the way she kept her eyes on the screen and refused to look up at me but I leaned on the counter, my head a few inches from her monitor so she could hear every word.

  “Because you look like it’s a problem. Are you discriminating against me because I have a penis?”

  “No sir...I mean ma’am. No ma’am.” I had played with the bitch so much that she was tongue tied.

  “For your insult I will take an upgrade and check my bag before I tell your boss that you are a transphobic cunt and get you fired bitch.” I hissed the words. I wasn’t in the mood to deal with any bullshit and this bitch had easily irritated me.

  “I’m sorry I…”

  “Save it...Just upgrade my shit.” I told her with a smile. I watched as her fingers moved over the keyboard at lightning speed. Motherfuckers couldn’t accept that I was born with a dick and I still looked good enough to steal a bitch’s man. And that was my problem, stealing all these married men was what had me in the airport with all my shit. I needed help, I needed to be reformed, and the first step was admitting it. My name is Fendi and I steal married, lowdown men and squeeze them for every fucking penny in their pocket, and I hope to settle down so I can change my ways. And H-Town was going to be the place for my transformation.

  4

  Above The Law

  Rachel Kelly fell right as she was about to catch her target. She was closing in, just about to leap onto her target’s back, but instead her face and clothes landed smack dab into the middle of the oily, alley asphalt. Her gun sliding across the concrete well out of her reach and into a puddle of murky water, as the person she chased ran ahead disappearing around a corner.

  “Dammit!” Rachel slapped the ground, jumping to her feet with military like precision. Picking up her gun and holstering it, she thought about giving chase. Running up the alley in the direction the woman disappeared until the sound of a rumbling engine invaded her ears and a bright light flashed in her face.

  “POLICE!! FREEZE!!” Two officers jumped from their vehicle with their guns drawn and pointed as Rachel slowly put up her hands.

  “Look...I’m a detective. I can show you my badge.” She said slowly, making sure to
give no sudden movements. “I am a detective.” She began trying to explain but she heard laughter.

  “Dammit...Detective Kelly is that you?” The lights went off but she kept her hands up anyway.

  “Yeah it’s me. The light blinded me, I can’t really see you. Can I put my hands down?” She blinked rapidly trying to get the focus back in her sandy brown eyes. Soon the neon shadows formed two of the uniformed detectives from her department, now standing in front of her laughing.

  “What did you do, come take a shower out here?” They laughed, pointing at her soiled clothes. Of all the people that had to catch me out here.

  “Damn Kelly. You look like you took a swim.” They both laughed, putting away their guns, and that quickly, a wild, hostile situation had turned into laughs.

  “Chasing an informant in a case. She got away.” The lies came out just as easily as her husband’s.

  “We got a call that shots were fired. Did you discharge your weapon or did the perp fire at you?”

  “Umm...When I fell it discharged.” Kelly was a breeding ground for lies. But she would say anything to get the young uniforms to leave.

  “Oh, okay. Didn’t know it was police business. We’ll go ahead and radio it in and…”

  “No, don’t.” Before she could stop him his finger was already on the radio.

  “Dispatch, this is car 38. It's a police related pursuit…” She tried to signal for him to stop but it was too late. Once a call went into dispatch there was no changing it. That information was logged and filed away and available for all to review.

  “Officer Rachel Kelly.” She turned around ready to scream a million fucks until she saw the white SUV pull up at the front of the apartment building.

  “Shit, it’s the lieutenant.” one of the uniforms said from behind her. She watched as he leaped out of his vehicle, his black wingtip shoes shining under the street light, up his chiseled chest and to the badge that hung around his neck on a brass string. He stopped for a moment, surveying the scene then walking towards the back of the building.

  “KELLY…” Through the darkness his bronze skin seemed to shine but tonight he was still the last person that Detective Kelly wanted to see.

  “Nixon and James” He yelled over to one of the uniformed officers. “You're dismissed. Get out of here.” He shooed them away and, like roaches when the lights are cut on, the pair started to scatter. Grabbing the radio from his own shoulder the lieutenant sent out a radio call of his own as only someone of his ranking could. “Dispatch, Lieutenant Miller is on the scene. Go ahead and cancel that backup.”

  “10-4 Lieutenant.” Lieutenant Miller holstered his radio with his eyes on Rachel Kelly.

  “What the fuck is going on? Are you trying to work out some personal frustration or something?” She couldn’t hold it any longer. The whole few days had been a whirlwind and now she was in front of her superior, being reprimanded for doing something as silly as losing her cool over her husband’s side chicks.

  “It's...a crazy situation, Sir. I’m sorry...I’m just…” her voice began to crack and she felt the sting of the tears in her eyes. “In a bad place.” She told him trying to stop herself before the tears came.

  “God dammit get yourself together. Get down to that damn hospital and sit beside your husband and act like this shit is all good.”

  “But...I can’t...I can’t be around him.”

  “What are you talking about? This is no time to get all emotional and vigilante…”

  “He cheated on me.” Kelly blurted it out. “I went home to look through some insurance information and guess what I found.” She ripped out a lease from her back pocket. Almost thrusting the piece of paper in his face.

  “A damn rent receipt. For an apartment in this building.” She pointed back up to the two story building. “I found the apartment and… a damn message to her in his phone.”

  “Kelly...dammit. You have to think better than this. I don’t give a shit what happened.”

  “Fuck that and fuck him. I’m tired of him. Now he wants me to nurse him back to health after finding all this?” She was ready to go off but Miller stopped her.

  “What do you want me to do? You can’t just leave him now, what will that look like for my election?” Lieutenant Miller was trying his damndest to get elected to mayor of Alpharetta. If he secured the job there would be an increase in pay, benefits, and a transfer away from law enforcement.

  “Why not?” Kelly crossed her arms, pouting like a child.

  “I just can’t leave my wife now.” That was it, simple as that, he had drawn his line in the sand but it was like a gut punch to Kelly. A deflating of her ego that told her exactly where she stood. She was the side chick and Lieutenant Miller never let her forget it.

  “But what if I don’t love him. I can’t just not say anything.”

  “You damn well better try. If people start suspecting things between us then we are both in deep shit, do you hear me?” He told her, turning his back and scanning the alley. “As a matter of fact. Come to my car and talk to me.” Miller didn’t wait for Detective Kelly to follow, instead he turned on his heels jogging back to his white unmarked SUV with windows tinted so dark that it was barely legal.

  As soon as her butt felt the leather seats Lieutenant Miller was driving off down the street, turning on another street and pulling over almost half a mile away from the apartment building. “Now what the fuck is wrong with you? You're acting like a fucking maniac.” He said throwing the truck in park.

  “What would you do if you found out your wife had a damn apartment with a man living in it?”

  “I wouldn’t do this. Come over here like John Wayne, causing undue attention.”

  “I’m sorry...it’s just not my best day. I can’t believe he would cheat on me...for this...this bitch.”

  “Oh stop the bullshit. You're doing the same thing. You aren’t any type of fucking Mother Teresa.” Rachel rolled her eyes but he was right. She chuckled a bit at her hypocrisy. “So what the fuck are you saying?”

  “I’m saying that we have a lot of money riding on you staying put. We have a lot of things that need to be done and you drawing attention is only going to fucking hurt us.”

  “I’m sorry…” but he didn’t want to hear that. Instead he put the car back in drive and eased down the street into another alley, so dark and scary that not even a street light shined down the small patch of pavement with broken glass and small trash dumpsters. Cutting off his headlights Lieutenant Miller was barely able to put the car in park before he grabbed her.

  “Come the fuck here.” He kissed her and she kissed back, their lips moistened with each other’s saliva as their tongues danced.

  “You don’t need that asshole. All you need is me.” The lieutenant held her, his burly hands going up her blouse, past her holstered gun to her bra strap.

  “I’ve wanted you all day. You don’t know how bad I want to blow that fucker away every time I see him.” He said through breaks they took from sucking each other’s tongues.

  Their sex was sort of mechanical, two cops groping each other in a cramped police vehicle wasn’t meant to be smooth and sensual but they had made far worse places work as their sex den.

  From abandoned buildings, to broom closets at the station, or wherever they could steal a few moments to share their love no matter how stiff the love looked.

  “I want you so damn bad.” She whispered. Her adrenaline pumping like a locomotive as her brain switched from being filled with anger to serotonin covered arousal.

  He pulled away at her blouse but a call over the radio stopped him short.

  “Lieutenant Miller...Over.” The dispatcher’s voice entered the car.

  “Just let it go. You're busy.” Kelly tried to coax.

  “I’ve gotta answer. I’m the only superior on tonight.” Miller said sitting back in his seat and snatching the radio from his shoulder strap.

  “Yeah…” Miller spat the words into the radio.
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  “It's your wife sir...she’s in labor.” The dispatch came over jubilant and happy, and from an angry scrunched up face, Miller immediately turned happy too, his lips curling up in a full smile.

  “Okay...Umm...tell her I’m on my way” he said, with nervous hands he somehow managed to start the car. “My wife,” he said adjusting his shirt as Detective Kelly did the same.

  “Yeah I heard. She’s in labor.” But he was too busy smiling, and just as quickly as he parked in the alley way, he slid back down through the alley, turning on the flaming police cherry lights to move all potential vehicles out of the way.

  “Damn...my baby is coming.” He said slapping the steering wheel. But Rachel gazed out the window as they drove. This was always her life, never getting what she wanted and having to share. She was never the main attraction and tonight she figured it out more than any other time that her husband nor her boyfriend could put her first.

  “I can’t win…” She said laughing as Lieutenant Miller rounded a corner.

  “Baby don’t be like that. You know I have to be there for this.” He said trying to hold her hand but she pushed him away.

  “Yeah, there for a baby that she damn near raped you to have.” Rachel recanted the story she was told by Miller.

  “It is what it is.” he said trying to stay away from the story of how he got his own wife pregnant, but Rachel wasn’t ready to let the conversation die.

  “I still don’t get how you got her pregnant and you said you sleep in the den with the damn door locked.”

  “She snuck in one night Rachel, what the hell can I say? She is my wife.”

  “But you want to marry me. Didn’t you say that?” Rachel threw back.

  “Dammit...I don’t have time for this shit.” He said pulling into the front of the apartment building.

  “I’ll call you tomorrow or something so we can talk.”

  “Talk about what? How now I have to wait even longer to be yours?”

  “If you would just chill out I can have this all figured out. And fuck this broad he’s fucking. We’re doing our thing and now you have grounds to get even more money when you leave his ass.” Lieutenant Miller rationalized but Rachel wasn’t trying to hear it.