If I Was Your Woman 3: A BBW Camden Love Story

by Mz. Toni

“It must be the hormones,” she said, causing me and Cherish to laugh.

  After Camille got dressed, Cherish had to leave to pick up her kids. I couldn't help but shake my head at that. She was only seventeen raising twins and she wasn't even with Jason anymore. Besides that, she had a stepdaughter. I was never one to judge and trust me I wasn't judging her, but that seemed like a lot for a teenager to handle.

  When Cherish left, Camille and I grabbed something to eat to catch up a little more because I definitely was feeling like an outsider. Pulling up to Olive Garden, we both parked and were seated.

  “So, did Cherish tell you who her kids’ father is?” she asked.

  “Yeah, his name sounds familiar.”

  “Girl, she probably said Mega, but we know him as Jason. He used to do security at Mark’s club.”

  “Ohh, I know who you talking about, he a cutie!” I said with a laugh.

  “Yeah, I know you don't take to new people well, but she’s been through a lot and just like you she has nobody and her mom ain't shit,” she said shaking her head. Now things were adding up. She’s living like an adult because in all actuality, she is an adult.

  “Maybe I can get to know her more, seems like we have a lot in common.”

  “Y'all definitely do,” she said.

  When the waitress brought our food I wasted no time diving in. I swear this damn baby of mine had me chowing down like crazy, but I didn't care at all.

  “So, how you feeling about the wedding?” I asked her.

  “I'm excited and nervous, but more excited than anything. I'm marrying the love of my life!” she said cheesing hard as hell.

  “I'm so happy for the both of you.”

  “So let me tell you how Alex came knocking on my door.”

  “Okay and when you slapped that bitch in her face what happened?”

  “I didn't, she actually seemed sincere about getting clean. I took her to rehab.”

  “Tell me you discussed it with Mark before doing it.”

  “You know what he would've said, so no, I just went ahead and took her.”

  “You fucking up, if he finds out he gonna fuck you up!’

  “That's his mom. Damn, he should be happy I helped her.”

  “Now you know like I know, that ain't gonna happen. He’s still hurt.”

  “I know, but hopefully he won't find out,” she said.

  “So what else is up?” I asked, only for her to tell me about Angel’s ass. I know she’s my blood, but she never acted like it so why should I. I already know she will never change, and when somebody shows me who they are I believe them. That didn't stop me from saying a silent prayer for her and her safety, but that's all I could do. As we were in the middle of the conversation, she got quiet as hell.

  “What the hell is wrong with you?”

  “Please don't act a fool, but Kasan is behind you. He just walked in with some chick,” she said, causing me to choke on my chicken alfredo.

  I saw the chick and instantly felt insecure. I’ve never been a hater and I wouldn’t start now. Her body was bad as hell. She didn’t have shit on my post pregnancy body, but with the way I looked right now she was definitely winning. I turned back around in my seat and continued eating my food and acted like I didn’t just see him. When we finished eating and the bill was paid, we both got up and turned to leave.

  While walking out the restaurant my eyes instantly locked with Kasan. I ignored his ass and continued to walk out the restaurant. I mean, just last night he was begging for me to take him back, now he’s on a date. When I got in my car, I talked to Camille for a minute. As we were talking Kasan came jogging out the Olive Garden.

  “Yo, how you just gonna walk by like you don't even know a nigga?” he asked.

  “Do I know you?”

  “Come on, stop being petty,” he said with a smirk.

  “I didn't wanna ruin ya date so I kept it pushing. I would hope you would do the same for me,” I said with my own smirk.

  “Don't fucking play with me!” he snapped.

  “There you go thinking you run shit again. I'm single and when I'm ready to mingle, trust I will.”

  “You better get ya friend!” he said looking over at Camille.

  “Nigga, I ain't getting shit. You on a date with that buffy the body bitch, wit her masculine ass face.”

  “Yeah a’ight, but when is your next doctor's appointment?” he said focusing back on me.

  “I’ll let you know. But anyways, Camille I will talk to you later,” I said before rolling up my window and starting my car.

  “So you just gone’ pull off?” he asked surprised.

  Chucking up my deuces I did just that, pulled the fuck off. I had no time to be all in my feelings and acting out of character. If he moved on then so would I.

  Chapter Eight (Shana)

  Things with me and Terrence have been great. I'm getting good dick from a good man and it feels awesome. We have been dating for a few months and he’s ready to take things to the next level, but I'm not. I mean come on now, I tried the whole falling in love, giving my all to a relationship and look how that turned out. I refuse to be hurt again. It's sad to say, but Raymond made it hard for me to love and give myself to another man. I'm not trying to mess up and lose what I have with Terrence, but I'm so scared. I trusted my husband. I gave him my life, my body, my soul and bared his children and he couldn't be loyal. Hell, if he couldn't I don't think any man could.

  I enjoy each moment I spend with Terrence. I love his daughter and he loves my children and we do a lot of things together. I'm sure in a perfect world the next move would be to make things official, but that doesn't work for me, and the fact that he has been so patient and loving makes it even harder. I don't want to hurt him while trying not to get hurt, and I don't know how much more he’ll put up with, but I'm sure it's not a lot. He is a handsome ass dude who could have any woman he wants so why would he continue to put up with someone who’s carrying so much baggage and refuses to get rid of it?

  “What’s up beautiful, what you thinking about?” Terrence asked walking up behind me.

  “I don't know, just thinking about life I guess.”

  “A life with me?” he asked.

  “No, just life,” I said nonchalantly. Looking at Terrence, I realized I didn't say what he wanted to hear, and like always he didn't get upset with me or catch an attitude.

  “Well, I'm ‘bout to dip, I gotta get to the club.”

  “Alright, we’ll see you later?” I asked.

  “Yeah, for sure,” he said kissing my lips softly. When he walked out I felt like shit. Here he is wearing his heart on his sleeve, showing me love and I'm knocking him down every time.

  I grabbed my phone and called Shante to see what she was up to. When she answered the phone I wasted no time venting. She stayed quiet the whole time as I told her how I felt. When I finished she finally spoke.

  “You have a man who loves you, right?”

  “I didn't say he loves me.”

  “Girl, shut up. He loves you and you love him, but you're letting Ray’s cheating, lying, dog ass stop you from having your happily ever after?” she asked. Now when she said it like that I just seemed stupid as hell.

  “It's not about Ray.”

  “You’re in denial, this has everything to do with Ray and that hoe Angel.”

  “So what do I do?”

  “You let it go and be happy, you deserve it.”

  “You're right, I do deserve to be happy, don't I?”

  “Damn right you do!” she said laughing.

  “I love you sissy, thank you!”

  “I love you too, boo, now go get ya man!” she said before hanging up.

  I jumped up and ran to go catch up to my man. Hopping in the car, I sped the whole way to his club and when I got there he was just getting out his car. Barely parking, I hopped out of the car and ran up to him.

  “What’s wrong, beautiful?” he asked with a worried face.

  �
�I know I have been difficult and I'm sorry!”

  “Slow down, you ain't been that bad,” he said with a smirk.

  “I love you, Terrence,” I said honestly.

  “I knew you loved a nigga,” he said with a smirk.

  “Shut up!” I said punching him.

  “Naw, but you already know how I feel about you.”

  “I do, but I still wanna hear it,” I said laughing.

  “I love you, I think you're beautiful, smart, sexy and funny,” he said kissing my neck, causing me to blush. He picked me up, threw me in his car and headed to my house.

  When we got to my house, he made love to me like it was our first time and I was gone off the D all over again. Once again he put me to bed. I didn't even notice I’d fallen asleep, but when I woke up Terrence was no longer beside me. Getting out of bed, I threw some clothes on and walked into my kitchen for something to drink only to find a note on the fridge from Terrence letting me know he went back to the club. I went back upstairs, grabbed my phone and had missed calls from everyone under the sun, including my simple minded ex-husband. He had my babies so I called him back first even though I knew he didn't want shit.

  “What’s up?” he said when he answered.

  “You called me.”

  “Yeah, why you ain't answer?” he asked, causing me to pull the phone from my ear so I could examine it and make sure I heard him right.

  “I was busy.”

  “Busy doing what, or should I say who?”

  “None of ya damn business what I was doing, are my kids good?”

  “Of course MY kids are good,” he said.

  “A’ight then,” I said hanging up in his ear. I had no time for Raymond and his games. I felt like he was stalking me lately. He seemed to know where I was and what I was doing all the time and I wasn't feeling it. The way he questioned me about who I was doing didn't seem like he was insinuating, it was more like he was making a statement like he had proof I was in here fucking. I had nothing to hide and no feelings for his ass and felt no need to explain shit to him because it‘s none of his damn business. After hanging up on him I called Queesha to see what she wanted.

  “What’s up boo!” she said when she answered.

  “Nothing, I was sleep when you called.”

  “Girl, it’s only four in the evening, you must have got some good D,” she said laughing.

  “Whatever, what did you want anyways?” I asked laughing.

  “Uh-huh, go ‘head and change the subject, bitch. I wanted you to know I sent you over part three of my book.”

  “Oh a’ight, I’ll send it over to the editor ASAP.”

  “Thanks, boo.”

  “So, how are things with you and Chris’ crazy ass?”

  “Things are great, but he’s been trying to have sex with me.”

  “You do know you can have sex, right?”

  “That would be risking his life and I ain't trying to do that,” she responded sadly.

  “I don't understand, but I understand, if that makes any sense.”

  “It does. I just love him so much, but how long will he be with me without getting any?”

  “That man loves your ass, I don't see him leaving you,” I said honestly.

  “I don't know. I feel real insecure whenever we see a sexy chick, he deserves someone better.”

  “What’s better than the best?” I asked.

  “I'm not the best, Shana. I got baggage, one of them being H.I.V.”

  “He knew about all your baggage and he loves you anyway. Stop trying to find shit to ruin what y'all got and accept the love he’s giving.”

  “Ain't you the pot calling the kettle black? It’s obvious Terrence loves you and you doing the same shit as me.”

  “I know what I was doing, but not anymore,” I said happily.

  “That's good to hear. Since you trying, so will I.”

  “A’ight boo, well I’ma hit you up later.”

  “Wait, you going to your man’s grand opening of his second club?” she asked.

  “What grand opening and what second club?” I asked, pissed. Just when I give this nigga a chance he turns around and fucks it up.

  “Girl, Chris slipped up and told me, talkin’ ‘bout don't tell the women ‘cause it supposed to be a all men thing,” she said laughing.

  “Now you know them niggas ain't havin’ no all men nothing, that’s just a way for them to flirt and cheat,” I said heated.

  “That's why we gonna crash that shit. You call Camille,” she said.

  “I got you boo, talk to you later,” I said hanging up. This nigga had me fucked up if he thought I would let his sneaky ass have a grand opening without me showing face and being on his arm. I dialed Camille’s number and waited for her to answer.

  “Hey, boop.”

  “We going out tonight.”

  “Girl, I ain't got no sitter.”

  “You better find one. Terrence is having his grand opening and all the men are going.”

  “Mark didn't tell me about no grand opening,” she said confused.

  “My point exactly.”

  “Oh, these niggas think they slick, huh? I got something for Mark’s trifflin’ ass!” Camille snapped.

  “So be ready by about eleven, that gives them time to feel safe,” I said laughing.

  “Mark knows I don't play these games, this nigga really tried it.”

  “We ain’t gonna be there long, at least I know I ain't. I'm picking up what belongs to me and getting my ass back home.”

  “I probably will stay since I know Terrence can't leave, but y'all can go.”

  “A’ight,” she said hanging up.

  I walked to my closet to find something sexy as hell for tonight. Pulling out a black bondage dress, I knew he would be pissed. I was tall as hell so the dress stopped just enough where you couldn't see my panties or lack thereof when I bent over. The time flew by and before I knew it Terrence was ringing my doorbell. When he walked in I almost forgot I was mad at him. He was looking good as hell in his designer suit and shoes.

  “What’s up, beautiful?” he asked, kissing my lips.

  “Nothing. You look good, where you going?”

  “I always look good,” he said with a smirk before moving his dreads out of his face. I swear, everything this nigga did made my panties drip.

  “Yeah whatever,” I said before sitting back on the couch. It was seven o’clock so I knew he wouldn't be here long.

  “Don't whatever me. What you got on under that robe?” he asked trying to pull it off.

  “Boy, go ‘head somewhere, I'm tryna watch Lifetime tonight. You watching it with me?” I asked, already knowing his answer.

  “Naw, I gotta handle some business at the club.”

  “I thought that’s what you had a manager for?” I pouted.

  “It is, but I gotta show face sometimes,” he said kissing my nose.

  “Anything special happening there tonight?” I asked, giving him one last chance to tell the truth.

  “What you mean?” he asked nervously.

  “You know, like ladies’ night?”

  “Oh naw, not tonight,” he said nonchalantly.

  “Oh okay, well don't work too hard.”

  “A’ight beautiful, let me head out,” he said before walking to the door.

  After kissing him passionately, I watched as he got inside his Bentley coupe. Now I definitely knew the nigga was lying. He didn't bring that car out unless he was trying to be flashy and turn heads. As soon as he pulled off I ran upstairs. I was already dressed, which is why I couldn't let him take my robe off. I pulled out my phone and called Camille.

  “What you wearing?” I asked Camille.

  “I got my freak’um dress on, bitch you already know I loves the games, so if he wanna play we can play.”

  “A’ight, you wanna go get something to eat since we ready now?”

  “Yeah, we can meet at Applebee's,” Camille said.

  “You think Shante
wanna go get something to eat?” I asked.

  “Yeah, I’ma call her, she been incongnegro lately,” she laughed.

  “Oh trust, I noticed. She on some sneaky shit, but I figure she’ll tell one of us when she ready.”

  “A’ight, well we heading out now,” Camille said.

  When we hung up I called Queesha only to find out she wasn't going because Chris wasn't going. She said he changed his mind. That bitch wasn’t fooling nobody. She made him change his mind, but I wasn't mad. When I finished getting ready I headed out to meet the girls. I called Shante and told her to meet us at Applebee’s. When I pulled up to Applebee’s everyone was already there. The waitress seated us and Shante wasted no time asking us why we were dressed like some hoochies.

  “Bitch, let me tell you what these niggas did,” Camille said.

  “Oh shit, they done fucked up,” Shante said laughing.

  “How the fuck Shana nigga gonna be having a grand opening and forget to invite us?” Camille said.

  “Yeah, Queesha said it’s supposed to be an all men thing,” I said shaking my head.

  “All men thing my ass!” Shante said cracking up.

  “Girl, they got us fucked up!”

  “So all y'all men there?”

  “Well not Chris, he changed his mind,” I said laughing.

  “I bet he did,” Cherish said.

  “They gonna fuck Chris’ ass up!” Shante said laughing.

  “Ain't nobody fucking Chris’ oversized ass up!” Camille added.

  “I kinda miss shit like this,” Shante said sadly.

  As mad as I am, I know they ain't doing shit but flirting with some bitches. This is the first time I had to deal with it, but it ain't a first for the other girls. I can honestly say they never caught them doing anything no matter how many times they lied about where they were going. I guess they need a break, but ain't no breaks when it come to us so they just adapt and get use to it.

  “Girl, miss it why?” Camille said.

  “I don't know, the arguing about petty shit, embarrassing they asses, then coming home and getting that good dick,” Shante said laughing.

  After we ate and said our goodbyes to Shante, we headed to the club. It wasn’t hard to find since it was in Philly and I knew my way around. Pulling up to the club, it was wrapped around the corner with people waiting to get in. Because this was a new club and we couldn't let them know we were there, we had no choice but to wait in the long ass line. After being out there for half an hour, I was ready to change my mind. My feet were burning, my legs were getting wobbly and I just wanted to go home.