The Sunburnt Country

by Palmer, Fiona

  ‘Come on, Rexie. You know you can’t beat me,’ teased JB.

  They never decided on the winner as they were called to the table for lunch. Dan stood, uncertain where he should sit.

  Jonelle’s hand slipped around his. ‘Come sit by me,’ she said. ‘I was last born so I’m the furthest from Dad.’

  Charlie was at one end, Uncle Rex at the other and everyone else sat in between. Dan sat down to the biggest array of meats and salads he’d ever seen. Even the smaller table the two kids were on against the wall was decorated and covered with food. Dan thought if they had any more food they’d need another huge table.

  ‘Here, grab your cracker,’ Jonelle said with a nudge.

  Everyone was holding their cracker with the person next to them, arms twisted over each other as the bangs fired off willy-nilly. Dan was trying to do one with Jonelle and the other with Monique. One tore in half, flinging the contents across the table and narrowly missing Sandra. Meanwhile Zac and JB were letting off the party poppers, covering the table in coloured streamers.

  ‘Boys,’ Sandra cried with a smile. ‘Hurry up and dig in, everyone,’ she urged.

  But no one started eating until all their coloured party hats were on and the jokes from their crackers had been read.

  ‘Those are the worst jokes ever,’ Dan said.

  ‘Of course! It wouldn’t be Christmas without the crap jokes,’ Jonelle said.

  Dan loaded up his plate as the salads were passed around.

  ‘Which ones did you make, Jonny?’ asked Zac with a smirk. ‘So I know to avoid them,’ he teased.

  Charlie gave Zac a clip around the ears with his good hand. ‘Be nice to your sister, or you can go without.’

  ‘You always favour Jonny,’ Zac complained like a child, teasing his father as JB leaned across and started cutting up his dad’s ham and chicken.

  ‘Someone has to look out for her with three older brothers,’ Charlie said.

  ‘Come on. She’s tougher than us,’ said JB. ‘Just about,’ he added with a smirk.

  Charlie brushed JB’s hand away. ‘All right, all right. I think I can manage from here. I don’t need it pureed. I’ve still got me teeth.’

  Dan felt a tap on his leg. He looked at Jonelle. ‘You having a good time? Glad you stayed?’

  How could he not be, with her gorgeous face beside him. Her hair was down, shining soft blonde waves that framed her perfect face and made her eyes glow so bright. ‘I’m having a blast.’ He couldn’t really say any more without the whole table hearing so he gave her a wink and tucked back into his meal.

  After their lunch, with full bellies, they all congregated in the games room for drinks. Some played darts, others pool and the rest watched and sledged. Dan realised that sledging, teasing and everything in between was a big show of affection in this family.

  By late afternoon Rex snored loudly on the couch, the kids were watching a new DVD, and everyone else was playing a game called Squatter. That was when Jonelle dragged him outside. She had changed out of her overalls by then and was wearing denim shorts and a Christmas singlet.

  ‘Where are you taking me?’ he asked hopefully. ‘Another present?’

  ‘Ha, you wish.’

  She guided him around the house to the lawn area. It sloped down away from the house, making the most of the beautiful land. They sat down under the shade of the arbour at the end of the garden.

  ‘I just wanted some quiet time with you before you leave. Our house can get a little nutty at times.’

  Dan lay back on his elbows. ‘You know, I thought I liked being alone at Christmas, but I really enjoyed today. I forgot how much fun it is to be involved. And your family’s pretty cool.’

  ‘Yeah, I think so too, but I’m biased.’ She heard a noise back up at the house and turned around to see her parents. ‘Hey, you two lovebirds. No secret stops at the shed now,’ Jonny yelled out, teasing them.

  Dan watched as Charlie and Sandra walked hand in hand down the little pathway at the side of the house.

  ‘Mum and Dad always go for sunset walks, not every night but as much as they can. I think it’s sweet that they make time for themselves. I can’t wait to have my own sunset walks.’

  Dan knew what she meant, and wished he could have been her someone special to walk with. The thought of Jonny hitching up with someone else hurt so much it felt like he’d taken a pair of pliers to his guts. ‘You’re lucky to have them. They look so in love, even after all these years. Nothing like how my parents behaved.’

  Jonelle shrugged. ‘Hey, they can fight like the rest of us. Mum didn’t talk to Dad for a whole week once, something to do with not telling her he’d got caught up with some fellas and come home at midnight drunk while she’d been worried sick. But they’re always there for each other when it counts. A bit like Dad is for us. There are times when he couldn’t come to our assemblies or sports days but he’d make it up to us by taking us camping or just playing with us outside. We never felt like we missed out.’

  ‘Yeah, total opposite of my father.’ Dan couldn’t help his tone. He thought back to a question Jonelle had asked him once. He hadn’t been ready to face the further interrogation his answer would have brought. ‘You asked me about my mum before and . . .’ Jonelle waited patiently for him to continue. ‘As far as I know, Mum only cheated with this one guy, Derek. They ended up getting married after the divorce went through.’ Dan had never wanted to talk about his mum for fear of upsetting his father, as if he was betraying him, but things felt different now.

  ‘Oh, so your Mum’s not a big bad wolf after all. She just did something totally human and fell in love with this other guy. Did you think that maybe your mum wasn’t happy with your dad? Was he easy to live with?’

  Dan smiled. ‘No. Not really. But back then she hurt me so bad. I felt for Dad and I went with him. But after a while she stopped calling, just like that. As if I never existed.’ Jonelle had a way of holding his attention and making him see things in a different light. He wondered how long it would be until he’d forget about her, before work and being back in the city made this whole time in Bundara seem like a distant memory. Right now he couldn’t imagine that happening, not soon, not ever.

  Jonelle was staring out at the setting sun. Its dying rays kissed her skin, feathering it with gold. He wished he could press his lips against her soft cheeks, then down to her mouth.

  ‘Did you know him, or ever meet him?’ she asked, turning, and moving her face out of the golden rays.

  Dan shuddered and forced himself to concentrate. ‘I did. He was Cam’s footy coach. He was always dropping Cam home after the games if Mum was busy and Dad was working. I think he volunteered his time at the club because his nephew played.’

  ‘So maybe your mum had her reasons for the affair?’

  ‘Yeah, maybe. But how could she leave her own kid?’ No matter how many times he’d tried to come to terms with this, it still hurt. Dan plucked at the grass. ‘Dad always said that it was Mum who tore our family apart and I always believed him, but maybe Dad had already done the damage by putting his work first. Your folks are so different. I realise how alone Mum must have felt, and if I’m honest, I also remember them arguing over him not being home enough. But Mum must have kept it to herself as I never remember her complaining to us about Dad.’

  ‘She was shielding you. She was being a good mother by not spoiling your relationship with your father.’

  Pity Dad hadn’t thought to show the same grace in return, Dan thought.

  Jonelle reached across and touched his hand.

  Dan laced his fingers through hers, holding them tight. ‘I guess. I wonder if Dad would have done anything different, tried any harder to be a better husband if he’d known the divorce was coming. I’ll never know, but then again, Dad hasn’t changed a bit the whole time I’ve known him.’

  ‘Some people don’t like change.’

  Dan lay back on his side, facing Jonelle, who did the same. ‘You’re one
of those people, Jonelle.’ She pulled a face and shrugged. ‘It’s okay to cling onto the past but sometimes you have to move forward, too. I know you love this place and your workshop, but if you don’t change something, you’ll risk losing it all. That money you put in the bank is only going to go so far. Unless it rains tomorrow, you won’t have the business to keep up your repayments. You can’t just expect everything to work out, Jonelle, Mother Nature isn’t like that. You think you’re trying to hold it all together, keep your community from changing so it stays the way you love it, but in the end, sometimes, you can’t stop it.’

  She nodded. ‘Change is coming whether I like it or not, right? And I know I need to do something, find another way to get some income, but you’re right, it means change and I hate change.’

  They lay side by side, barely a foot apart. Dan reached across to touch her hand again. ‘I really want to kiss you.’ It was a passionate whisper.

  He was rewarded with a smile, but it was the one she gave when she was sad.

  ‘I feel the same.’

  ‘And I feel a but coming,’ he said, studying her melancholy eyes.

  ‘But,’ she sighed, ‘if we do, it’s only going to make things harder. I don’t know about you, but it’s already hard enough for me. You’ll be leaving so soon.’

  ‘I know. This was only ever a two-month gig.’ Dan pulled out his mobile. ‘Smile.’ Then he captured her picture, so stunning in the golden glow. ‘Now I can take you back with me.’ He glanced at the photo he’d taken and then to the real-life version. Oh, he knew which one he’d prefer to take. ‘Are you sure you won’t come back with me? There’s plenty of work going and you can live with me.’

  ‘Ah yes, and we could take turns cooking and walking our dog.’

  ‘We’d have a dog?’

  ‘Yes, a labrador called Digger and maybe some fish.’

  Dan smiled, enjoying this plan.

  ‘But I’d much rather you live out here with me, then I wouldn’t miss my brothers and Renae and Ryan so much.’

  ‘I have friends I’d miss too.’

  ‘Do you? I’ve never heard you talk about them. They haven’t come to visit you while you’ve been here.’

  ‘My mate Josh called me just the other day to see when I’d be back. Josh wouldn’t drive out here. None of my mates would. It’s too far away.’

  ‘Yet we go to the city all the time to visit family and friends.’

  She had him there. But it was just different.

  ‘What is your life like in the city?’ she asked, leaning back on her elbows.

  Dan shrugged. ‘Well, I go to work and afterwards I head to the gym with my mate Marcus most nights. On weekends I might go out with Josh and Marcus for drinks at a few places that we like. We all went to school together and there was another mate, Scott, but he’s married with kids now. I’m actually a godparent to his son Harley, so I like going over there to spend some time with him.’

  ‘Really. How old is he?’

  Dan smiled as he thought of Harley. He’d sent Scott some emails a few weeks back with some photos from around Bundara and of the kangaroo he’d seen near the lookout. He thought Harley would get a kick out of that. ‘He’s seven. His sister Lacey is five. Wait till I show him the photos of you racing, he’ll love them.’ Jonelle was smiling at him strangely. ‘What?’

  ‘Nothing. It’s just nice hearing this side of you. I know nothing of your life yet you know all about mine, even my bank balance,’ she joked. ‘So what happens when you go back?’

  ‘I was going to say work as usual but I applied for this new position at the bank, which I got —’

  ‘Well done you!’

  ‘Thank you. It’s better pay, a much higher position and ticks all the boxes. Also Marcus is doing a triathlon soon, so I’ll be back to cheer him on.’

  They fell quite for a while and Dan wondered what Jonelle thought about his life in Perth. Would she be wondering if she could fit into that world? He wondered if maybe after he’d left she might change her mind and come find him. Considering they’d only know each other a short time, he doubted she’d give up everything she loved just for him. But dreams were free.

  ‘Will today be the last time I see you?’ she said, her voice wavering.

  He shook his head slowly. ‘I couldn’t leave Bundara without seeing you again. I’ll be off on Friday. I’ll find you.’

  Dan wondered if her chest hurt as much as his did. He knew he had to go back to Perth, he knew he had to leave Jonelle, he knew life would go back to the way it used to be, but it still didn’t stop the ache and the horrible feeling that he was leaving something magical behind in the tiny town of Bundara.

  Chapter 33

  AFTER a few days off for Christmas, Jonelle found going back to work hard. Even harder when what was staring her in the face was a pile of book work. Leaning back in her chair, she put her boots up on the desk and crinkled some bills underfoot. She wasn’t worried, half her invoices went out smudged with dirt and grease anyway. That’s what you get when you can’t afford any office staff, she thought. She put her hands behind her head as she stretched out. It was hot in the office. She’d taken off her overalls and was in her shorts and singlet, but sitting still in the heat was making her sweat. She stared at the opposite wall, counting the daddy-long-legs spiders that had accumulated there.

  With a sigh, she dropped her legs from the desk and scooted forward to study the bills next to the bulky computer, which whined noisily. Lifting up a bank statement, she glared at it. ‘This sucks.’ Thanks to the sale of the Torana she had given herself some breathing space. God, that was a painful day. Just seeing the out-of-towner pull up to her workshop with the empty trailer on his car made her heart sink. He was young, about twenty-two, and she’d been so worried her Torrie wouldn’t be looked after. ‘Man, this is a sweet ride. She’s everything you said.’

  Jonny had just nodded as the guy in the reflective sunnies and baggy jeans touched her car. The top of his underwear had been showing but that must have been the look he was going for.

  ‘I’ll take it,’ he’d said pulling out his chequebook. Jonny had wanted to refuse him the car but no matter how hard this was, she had to do it. She’d taken a long glance at her workshop, then back to the Torana and then back to the workshop. The car had to go. Holding out her hand she’d accepted the sale. Watching her beloved orange Torana leave her forever had brought a few tears and once she started she’d found it hard to stop. Why did life have to be so hard?

  But even with that money it wasn’t going to hold off the bank for long. It was just like Dan said – she had to do something. She needed more work, more money coming in, and selling the workshop was not an option. She threw the statement off her desk in disgust and watched as it fluttered to the floor, landing on a shiny shoe.

  Daniel reached down and picked it up. ‘Want me to burn it?’ he said with a smile.

  ‘Not going to fix my problem, though, right?’

  Dan stepped up to her desk, his aftershave wafting across to her. It was like she’d skolled a Red Bull. All her senses sprang awake. He was dressed for work, in slacks and a crisp shirt. He was like a shiny new bolt in a collection of dirty, greasy ones. Maybe that was another reason he stood out to her, he was different to the other scruffy fellas in town.

  ‘You ready to leave?’ she asked.

  When he nodded, she stood up and walked to his side of the desk.

  ‘A shame you can’t stay for New Year’s Eve. They’re having a big bash at the hall but Ryan and Renae don’t want to go, so Zac suggested we have our own one here. They loved the idea, so we’re having a shed bash. Or a Piss Off 2012 bash,’ she said with a weak smile.

  ‘You look a little worn out,’ he said, reaching for her shoulder.

  His touch was gentle, caring. They’d been trying so hard to keep their distance, not wanting to fall into bed and make this moment any harder. It’s why he hadn’t come back for Boxing Day.

  ‘Hey, wh
ere have you put the Torana? She’s not in her usual spot. I thought I’d better get a photo for Harley before I go.’

  Jonny frowned, her lips curving down. She couldn’t say it. She felt like a mother who had just sold her child to stay alive. Maybe a bit dramatic but the Torrie was her baby.

  ‘The cheque! Jonelle, did you sell your car?’ His face was grim.

  ‘Hmm, let’s not talk about this now. You’re leaving. That’s sad enough.’ She looked across at his face, which was filled with sorrow.

  Stepping closer, he touched a strand of her hair. ‘I feel like a different bloke. This place is pretty special and I can see why you cling to it so hard.’

  ‘Please stay,’ she blurted. Her life was turning to shit, her car sold, she was about to lose her workshop and now Daniel was leaving. This man who had more of her heart than she’d like to admit. ‘You said yourself Bundara is special and you fit in well here. Zac thinks you’re great and so do I. Please, won’t you stay? Let’s give us a go. We could be really good together.’

  He actually looked like someone had stabbed him with a pen. ‘Jonelle, I have a new job to go to. I have a career . . . I can’t stay.’

  ‘What . . . not even for me?’ Something was sucking the air out of her lungs. She would not cry. She would not let him know just how invested she’d become.

  His hands tightened on her arms, slowly pushing her away. ‘Bundara is suffering, businesses are closing. I don’t want to work at the bank. What else is there for me here?’ Jonny tried not to let the pain from his comment show. ‘It would be more practical if you came with me to Perth. You’re going to lose your business if things don’t get better, so why not have a fresh start with me?’ Dan smiled as he nodded, a plan brewing in his mind. ‘Yes, see! You could get a job in the city and we can do everything we planned at Christmas. Doesn’t that sound better?’