REMEMBER ME: GODS OF CHAOS MC

by Palomino, Honey

  “Oh, um…okay, I guess,” I said, flashing him a quick smile.

  “Good, good…that’s a lovely smile.”he said. “Now let’s check your other muscles, okay?”

  He pulled my hands out, pressing against them as he asked me to press back.

  “Yeah, that’s it, good, good…”

  He stopped and stood staring at me for a few more moments. The silence was awkward and I was completely bewildered at this point. Who were these people and how the hell did I get there?

  “Alrighty, well, shit. You look pretty good to me. You’re starting to heal really well.”

  Heal? From what?

  “Why am I here? What happened to me?” I asked again, my voice rising with the panic growing in my belly.

  “Oh. Yeah. Well, Ryder here can fill you in on all that. I think you should continue resting here for a while, and then when your strength has returned fully, you can go home.”

  Go home. Home. Home? Where was home? I shook my head in confusion, looking to Ryder for some answers as Doc patted my hand.

  “So good to see you up and talking, you had me worried there for a while, Miss,”he said, before turning and walking out of the room.

  “I don’t understand…”I said, turning to the man with the intense blue eyes. I let my gaze slide over him quickly. His long black hair fell onto his very wide shoulders, grazing the black leather vest. His arms were covered in tattoos and so thick and ropey with muscles, he almost didn’t look real. If it wasn’t for those gentle eyes, I might have thought I was dreaming again.

  “Well, do you remember anything that happened? I found you…um…with a man. He had beaten you up. On a dirt road, in the middle of nowhere, really. We’re in the middle of the Tillamook forest. If I hadn’t come along, you wouldn’t be here now.”

  What the hell was he talking about? I didn’t remember any of that.

  “You saved me?”

  “Well,”he said,“I guess so, yeah.”

  “Why?”I asked.

  “Why?”he asked, perplexed. “Why the hell not?”

  “I don’t remember any…of that…”I said, reality slowly dawning on me, as my voice trailed off.

  “No?”he asked. “Well, you were already passed out by the time I got there, so I’m not surprised. But listen, you’re okay now. Doc fixed you up. And your bruises are pretty gnarly, but the scratches are superficial and should heal up pretty quickly.”

  What was he talking about? How was that possible?

  “How long have I been here?”I asked.

  “Well. Three days to be exact.”

  “What!” I said, panic and pain washing over my body simultaneously as I tried to sit up again.

  “It’s okay, really. Now that you’re awake, you can tell me who you are and where you live and we can take you back home. I would have contacted your family or something, but you didn’t have any identification or anything on you.”

  “Oh. I didn’t?”

  Ryder smiled at me reassuringly.

  “Seriously, it’s okay. Do you want to call someone? I bet you’ve got some people worried about you, right? You can use my cell. Here.” He reached into his pocket, pulling out a cell phone and handing it to me.

  “No, um…I don’t…um…” My voice trailed off as I searched my brain for clues. Anything. But there was nothing. I had no idea who to call. Or where to go.

  “Hey, what’s your name, anyway? I’ve been dying to know. Guessing, even,”he said, shrugging playfully, smiling at me as if the whole world hadn’t just crumbled into a big pile of uncertainty. “Liz? Sarah? Tiffany?”

  “I-I-I don’t know,” I whispered, my eyes filling with tears. “I can’t remember…my name…or who I am…or where I live…or anything. Oh, my god!” I sobbed, my heart filling with fear.

  “What?”he asked, his eyes blue widening with shock. “No fucking way!”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Ryder

  Well, fuck, now what? I certainly wasn’t expecting her to wake up and not know who the fuck she was. I figured once she woke up, I’d explain what happened, and she’d be up and around and go back to her life. But she didn’t even know her name. What the fuck was I supposed to do with that?

  “Um…fuck. I don’t know what to say, Miss. Do you know anything? Where you grew up? Anyone else’s name?”

  “Nothing. My memories are completely erased. I can’t believe this!” She kept sobbing, and it was making me even more uncomfortable.

  Shit!

  This wasn’t the right time for me to be thinking about myself, so I pushed my frustration aside and tried to put myself in her place. She must be terrified. I patted her arm as she sat up in my bed, her head in her hands, her sobs shaking her entire body.

  “Okay, okay, listen…I’m sure this is just temporary, okay? It’ll all come back to you soon, I bet. Just try to rest and relax. You’re safe here, I promise. Whatever happened is over. That guy won’t be coming back for you, and you’re welcome to stay here until you get better.”

  She sobbed and sobbed, huge tears leaking out the side of her hands as she buried her face in them. When I mentioned the man that had beaten her, she gasped and looked over at me.

  “Why would a man beat me up? How do you know he won’t come back for me?”Fresh fear filled her eyes as they darted to the closed door and back to me.

  Fuck. I was hoping that question would come later. I didn’t want to scare her at all, and I knew that if I answered truthfully, she might not trust me after that.

  “Well, how about we talk about that more in depth later? Just trust me. He won’t be bothering you again, I promise. Like I said, you’re safe.”

  “Maybe I should go to the hospital?”Her eyes squinted at me as another realization dawned on her. “Why didn’t you take me there anyway?”

  Fuck! She was full of questions that were sure to make me look like an asshole. Normally, I wouldn’t give a shit. I was used to being the bad guy, so it didn’t really matter. But, for some reason, with her, with this beautiful stranger, I didn’t want her to think of me that way.

  “Look, Miss,”I took a deep breath before continuing. “Like I said, this is a motorcycle club. We’re outlaws. We don’t operate like normal folks. I found you, and well…if I took you to the hospital in the state I found you in, they surely would have assumed I was the one who did that to you, and I just couldn’t have that. I’m not a big fan of being confined or eating shitty food. Not to mention the lack of bikes and the entertainment sucks. And Doc knows his stuff. I should have told you. He’s a retired Army medic, and I trust him. He said you were okay, he kept a very close eye on you, and your vitals, and we made the decision to keep you here, to keep you safe. Like I said, there was no identification on you, and I don’t know anything about you. Or who might be looking for you.”

  “Outlaws?”she asked.“Like criminals?”

  “Sure, if you wanna put it that way,”I replied.

  “I see,”she whispered, her eyes drifting away from me and looking around the room. “So, where have you been sleeping? This is your room? Your bed?”

  “Sleep? Well, I haven’t really had a lot of that. I’ve just been basically waiting for you to wake up.”

  “For three days?” she asked, her left eyebrow arching up, causing her to wince in pain.

  “Yeah. Three days. Today’s Friday.”

  “Friday? What month? What year? God, I can’t believe I don’t remember this!” Panic rose in her voice, and her eyes once again filled with tears.

  “Today is Friday, October 13th. It’s about eleven at night.”

  “Okay,”she whispered, her voice so lost and small I almost couldn’t hear her. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. Feel free to ask me anything at all. I’ll be here to help, and there’re some other people in the clubhouse that you can talk to, also. It can be a little chaotic around here, but for the most part, everyone is harmless.” I saw the fear in her eyes, and I reminded myself to have a talk
with everyone else as soon as possible. “Listen, don’t worry. We’ll figure this out,”I said, reassuringly. I had no idea how, but there had to be something we could do. “Everything’s going to be okay, I promise.”

  She smiled for the first time, and my breath caught in my throat as I realized just how beautiful she really was.

  “Thank you for saying that,”she said, sighing.

  “You’re welcome. Can I get you anything right now? Do you need anything? Those clothes you’re wearing belong to one of the club ladies here, well, the t-shirt is mine, actually.” She looked under the sheet at the sweats and t-shirt she was wearing. I realized what she might be thinking. “The girls changed you, helped make you more comfortable.”

  Relief flooded her eyes, and she nodded slightly.

  “What was I wearing?”she asked.

  Visions of what she might look like naked filled my head, and for the first time since I had picked her up, I felt my cock swell slightly in my pants. What the hell was wrong with me? I snapped out of it.

  “What? Wearing?”

  “Yeah, when you found me.”

  “Oh, yeah, that. Well, you were barefoot, but I found some heels that probably belong to you. And you had on a very short, tight denim skirt. And a tight, black tank top.”

  She wrinkled her nose, and all I could think about was how adorable she was. And how, if the circumstances were different, and she was lying in my bed, under my sheets, I wouldn’t be sitting here beside her fully clothed.

  “I see. That’s so weird.” Her voice fell away and her eyes filled with confusion.

  “Um…I um…”she turned to me again shyly, and then took a deep breath. “I really need to use a bathroom.”

  “Oh! Right!” I jumped up. “Of course, god, I bet you do.” I stared blankly at the IV tube coming out of her hand. “Okay, shit…um…well, let me go get Doc again, okay?”

  “Just…um…you know, stay here. Don’t go anywhere.” I said, and I ran out the door to find Doc.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Grace

  “Don’t go anywhere,”he said.

  I looked down at my body, my legs covered in sweat pants that were a little too tight for my curvy hips, and a t-shirt that was entirely too big. The IV in my hand practically tied me to the bed, and he was telling me not to go anywhere?

  Where would I go? Where in all of the world would I go?

  Was this really happening to me? Maybe I was dreaming. I remembered nothing before I woke up. The only thing I could recall was vague, streaky images of light and muffled music. Everything before that just didn’t exist.

  How in the hell could this be possible?

  I looked down at my hands. They were familiar. My body was familiar. But when I tried to remember how old I was, or what my name was, I came up empty.

  Doc came in and went straight to removing the IV from my arm.

  “I don’t think you’ll be needing this anymore,”he said. He was like a big, jolly bear. I decided that I liked him immensely.

  “Okay…um, thank you…Doc,”I said to him, my voice full of gratitude.

  “Sure, honey, you bet. Okay, now let’s get you on your feet. Just put one arm around me and the other one around Ryder here, and we’ll get you up real nice and slow.”

  My body was sore and I winced in pain. But I was determined to get up, to get out of this bed, to figure out who the hell I was and where I came from, and going to the bathroom was the first step in doing that.

  When I felt the warmth of Ryder on my right, I felt chills run along my skin. I inhaled, and the musky, leathery scent of him took up permanent residence deep inside the corners of my mind.

  Slowly, they pulled me up, and my toes touched the braided rug on the side of the bed. I grunted as I engaged my thigh muscles, the weakness noticeable, but thankfully not debilitating. I stood on my feet, a little wobbly, but I stayed upright.

  “Okay, good, good,”Doc said. Ryder held on to me silently, his warm arm wrapped around the back of my waist. “Now, let’s take a few steps, shall we?”

  I put one foot in front of the other, and after several steps, I removed my arms from around their shoulders. First Doc, then with just a flash of recognition that I was hesitant to let him go, I let go of Ryder. He kept his warm hand on the small of my back and I continued forward. He walked beside me and with each step I took, I became steadier.

  Finally, his fingertips disappeared from my back, and I was walking all alone.

  “I think I’m okay,”I said. “Thank you.”

  They stood beside each other, nodding and smiling at me.

  “So, um…the bathroom?”

  “Oh, right!”Ryder said, motioning towards a door in the corner of his room, opposite the one he had come out of. I remembered how he had described what was on the other side of that door, and I was thankful I didn’t have to be introduced to the chaos he had referred to.

  “Thank you,”I said, walking to the door and nodding as he opened it for me.

  “Of course, of course,”he said. “Feel free to take a shower, if you’d like. There’re fresh towels and everything in there. Let me know if I can get you anything.”

  “Yes, okay, thank you, Ryder,”I said, smiling at him as best I could muster.

  I closed the door behind me and came to face to face with myself in the mirror. Just like with my hands, and my body, it was familiar like only your own face can be, but it was covered in bruises. My left eye was puffy, and I had a scratch on my right cheek and one on my neck. But still, I could not put a name on the person standing in front of me.

  I knew what I looked like. I could have drawn a picture of myself before I had looked in the mirror. But why couldn’t I remember anything? This was absurd, and I felt the panic begin to rise in me again.

  Quickly, I peed, my mind racing.

  Something awful had happened to me, but what? Was someone out there looking for me? Did I have a family? Who would want to beat me? And why? Luckily, there was no pain when I went to the bathroom, so hopefully I wasn’t raped. I was thankful for that. I felt okay, except for the slight pain around my eyes, and a whole lot of sore muscles, but by looking at me, you wouldn’t really even know anything was wrong.

  I looked like anybody. And yet, somehow, I was nobody.

  Ryder’s words flowed through my head. He was trying to comfort me, I knew that. He seemed so kind and thoughtful, even if he looked a little intimidating. I was thankful he had saved me from who knows what. There’s no telling if I would even be alive if he hadn’t come along.

  But that bit about everything being okay?

  I wasn’t so sure about that. I might not remember what happened, but something certainly didn’t feel right.

  Whatever it was that I had forgotten, it was really bad.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Ryder

  When she came out of the bathroom, I was pacing the room like an angry lion, trying to come up with a solution, a way, any way, to figure out who she was.

  “Listen, I have a few ideas…”I said, as she slowly wandered around the room. It was a bit of a shock seeing her upright, seeing her move around. She had showered, her face scrubbed of the remnants of the makeup she had been wearing. Her long, blonde hair hung in wet strands down her back. She looked fresh, young, healthy. And so fucking beautiful, it almost hurt to look at her.

  I swallowed hard, and I realized I was having a hard time staring straight into those pale green eyes, and I wasn’t sure why. Something about her unnerved me, and that never, ever happened to me. I had nerves of steel, and I had ever since…well, since Julie.

  I had shut down afterwards - it was the only way I could survive the pain of it all. And by shutting down, that meant nobody got under my skin. Nobody.

  And yet, here she was. This stranger that I had killed for. This knock-out of a woman that had stumbled into my life and was now presenting me with the great mystery of all. Who was she?

  “Yes?”she asked, her huge green eyes b
linking at me. Why did she trust me? Why wasn't she running her perfect ass out the door? Instead, she was looking at me like I must have all the answers. But in reality, all I had was a long-shot.

  “I should have done this already, I guess. But I never dreamed you’d be unconscious for so long, and then I certainly never imagined you wouldn’t know who you were when you woke up. So, anyway…one of my brothers, his name is Riot, well, he’s got a knack for computer stuff, so I’m going to have him do some searching for missing persons, see if you show up at all, okay? Unless you have a better idea?”