Redemption (A Golden Beach Novel Book 5)

by Kim Loraine

  “Just like the others.” Michael’s voice was rough as it caught in his throat.

  “Exactly. It looks like the fire that took John might have been the beginning for this guy. Forensic data from that fire pointed to improperly discarded oil rags, but now . . . this one makes three fires started by deliberately sealed boxes of combustible material.”

  Ice filled his veins as he listened and processed the words. “So, we’re thinking the first fire might have been an experiment? Sort of a trial run to see if it was true that linseed can spontaneously combust?”

  “That’s what the Fire Marshal is saying. And I’m inclined to agree. I think this guy got the taste for it and has been upping his game. What might have started as mischief has turned into something much more sinister. For now, the arson investigation team is scouring photos from the scenes, trying to make a connection between bystanders. Do you remember seeing anyone who looked suspicious before the roof collapsed?”

  Wracking his brain, he let out a frustrated breath. “No. Aside from the asshole who nearly killed Donovan, I didn’t really survey the crowd.” He should have been checking the faces of onlookers before he went inside.

  Nodding, Chief Roman crossed his arms over his chest. “That brings me to another topic I need to address with you.”

  “I’m fine, Chief. I’m good. Shoulder’s a little stiff, but I’ve got full mobility back.”

  “That’s not what I wanted to talk about. Michael, you’ve seen more in fifteen years in the fire service than most people with double your time. I know you’re a solid firefighter. Hell, you’re one of the best I’ve worked with. But sometimes the job changes the person and priorities shift. After everything you’ve seen, I want you to know that a move to a different job in the department wouldn’t be something to be ashamed of.”

  Michael’s breath caught in his throat. “What? You think I can’t handle the job?”

  Holding his hands up, his boss shook his head. “That’s not what I’m saying. It’s been suggested to me by the higher ups that you might be well suited for a career in fire investigation. It’s not a lateral move by any means. You’d be promoted, better hours, less risk, and you’ve already got most of the training.”

  “But . . . I wouldn’t be here anymore. I can’t leave this station. This place has been my second home.”

  “I’m not asking you to. Just presenting the opportunity. Think about it. Talk to Lena. You don’t have to choose right now.”

  Furrowing his brow, Michael let the possibilities wash over him. “Okay. Thanks, Chief. Anything else?”

  Chief Roman turned back to his computer, signaling to Michael their conversation was over. With a nod, Michael stood and walked toward the door.

  “Oliver, one more thing,” the Chief called. “You remember we’ve got a probie starting today? She’ll be here any minute. You might want to remind the guys that sexual harassment is a real thing.”

  As Michael walked back to his desk, he let the idea of a career change ruminate. Is that what he wanted? No more putting out fires, but catching the bad guys instead. He wasn’t sure.

  The alarm blared as soon as he sat down. “Engine. Medic. Motor vehicle collision. “

  At the same time, a slight woman with coffee-colored skin and bright eyes burst through the door. “Is that the alarm? Where do I go?”

  Michael stared her down and raised an eyebrow. “Probationary firefighter Makayla Gray?”

  With a mixture of fear and excitement on her face, she nodded.

  “You’re with me. Let’s go.”

  “I’m so fucking excited, I think I might puke.”

  He fought off a laugh as he showed her to the engine and her waiting bunker gear. “Don’t puke on me and we’ll be fine.”

  As they piled into the engine, he shot Sully a look that said, she’s-off-limits. Sully flipped on the siren and lights with a chuckle and a shake of his head.

  “I’m not fucking kidding, Sullivan,” Michael said over the noise in the truck.

  Sully feigned innocence, but paled when Makayla shouted, “Hey, didn’t we sleep together once? You do yoga, right?”

  Lena followed with her heart in her throat as her mom walked slowly but surely from the car to the front door of her childhood home. It had been almost two months of rehab, physical therapy, speech therapy, and doctor visits, but she’d finally been able to bring her mom home. Sirens rang out in the distance, making her jump and tense.

  “Lena-chan, it will be fine.”

  She winced, not realizing she was so transparent. The fear of losing Michael was even more palpable now that she’d had such a brush with that reality. “You don’t know that.”

  “I can only hope. You can’t spend every day worried he’ll be taken from you. If you do that, one day you’ll wake up and realize all of your time together was darkened by fear.”

  “I’m afraid of everything with him.”

  A soft smile spread across her mother’s face as they entered the house. “You love him. If you weren’t scared, I’d wonder what was wrong with you. You’re like your father. He used to tell me I scared him because of the possibilities I showed him.”

  Anger bubbled up in her chest. “Don’t say that. He left us. I don’t want to be anything like him.”

  “You can’t change that. Besides, there was a lot of good in him.”

  Rolling her eyes, Lena huffed out a breath. “If good means abandoning his wife and child, then I think I’ll pass.”

  “Sit down. I think we need to talk about something.”

  The seriousness in her mother’s voice brought her up short. Sinking down onto the small couch, she stared at eyes that were almost a mirror image of her own.

  “Lena, why is it that you don’t want to have children?”

  An uncomfortable prickle started between her shoulder blades. She and her mom never talked about stuff like this. “I know what it’s like to be abandoned by my father. I don’t want to put my child in a situation like that.” Shrugging, she pushed away the ache she felt when she thought of what a child made of her and Michael would be like. “I saw how hard it was for you. You never got over him. He left you saddled with me.”

  Her mother’s face crumpled, and her eyes glazed over with tears. After a harsh breath, she looked at Lena and blinked, letting the moisture fall down her cheeks. “I never told you the truth about your dad.” A sick feeling clawed at her stomach as her mother continued. “The man I married wasn’t your biological father.”

  “What?”

  “When I was young, I worked at the Navy base in Japan. I met a man there, fell in love, ended up pregnant. He was transferred before I even knew about you. He asked me to go with him, but I broke his heart and said no. I wasn’t ready. The man I married was someone I met shortly after your father moved. When I found out I was pregnant, I was distraught. My parents would never have accepted me being a single mother. He agreed to marry me, to bring me back to the US so I could become a citizen and give you a good life. I fell in love with him, but his heart was never in it. He left us because it was what we’d agreed to do. He purposefully didn’t get close to you because he knew he’d be leaving.”

  “This is a joke, right?” Lena’s chest hurt. Her whole life, she’d thought her dad hadn’t wanted her. And all along, he’d never even known about her.

  “I’m sorry. I thought it was better for you not to know.”

  Shaking her head, she stood. “No. This is not better. Not at all.”

  “I see that now. I made you afraid of settling down, of having a family. I’m so sorry.”

  Tears brimmed in Lena’s eyes. Her mother was right. She’d spent her life thinking that it was easy to leave your child, easy to break up a marriage. Now she knew the truth. “Did you ever try to find my real dad?”

>   “He died in the Gulf War, right after he left Japan.”

  Closing her eyes, Lena tilted her face up to the ceiling and let out a shuddering breath. “I see.” She didn’t know how to feel. Her poor mother must have spent her life silently mourning the loss of two men she’d loved. A tear slipped down her cheek as she turned her gaze on the small, defeated form of her mom. She wanted to be angry, but instead a heavy sadness gripped her. “You must have been so lonely.”

  Her mom shook her head vehemently. “No. No, I had you. I wouldn’t have changed anything if it meant not having you, Lena-chan. You are the most important thing I’ve done. You’ve brought me so much happiness.”

  Crossing the room, Lena wrapped her arms around the smaller woman, breathing in her familiar scent and let go of all the resentment she held toward her father.

  A pang of longing ran through her as she got in her car and started the familiar drive home. She wanted to see Michael, to tell him everything she’d learned, but he was on duty. She wouldn’t see him until morning. Needing to talk to someone, she pulled into the parking lot of Donovan and Valerie’s apartment complex, fished her phone out of her bag, and dialed.

  “Hey, Lena.” Valerie’s weary tone set her on edge immediately.

  “What’s wrong with you?”

  “Oh, nothing. I just . . . I’m a little tired.”

  Glancing at the clock on her dash, she frowned. “It’s not even four in the afternoon.”

  “I just finished exercising.”

  Lena was about to ask her if she could come up when she heard the deep rumble of Donovan’s voice in the background. “Sweetheart, I’m pretty sure I still owe you two more after this morning. Get off the phone and let me pay up.”

  “Oh, gross. Exercising? When does he go back to work?” Lena fought off the urge to gag at the idea of Donovan giving Valerie what she thought he was planning to deliver.

  Valerie chuckled and Lena heard the sound of a door shutting. “He’s still at least three weeks out at the earliest.”

  “It sounds like he’s taking advantage of all his leave.”

  “I think he’s trying to make up for lost time. He’s only started to feel better over the last few days. It might have something to do with the fact that we set a date for the wedding.”

  That made Lena break out into a wide grin. “You did?”

  “Yeah. Almost losing him,” she took a shuddering breath. “It made me realize how stupid I was being. I want to spend every minute I can married to him.”

  “So? When?”

  “January seventh.”

  “January? That’s not far away. Are you knocked up?” Lena teased.

  “Ha-ha. You’re hilarious. Do you think Hallie will do our pictures?”

  Hurt coursed through her at Valerie’s question. “What? Why wouldn’t I get to do that?”

  “You’re going to be in the wedding. There’s no way I’m getting married without you up there. I want you in the pictures not behind the camera.”

  Her heart swelled with love for her friend. “Thank God you said that. I was going to have to revoke your best friend credentials.”

  “That’s not happening. So, what did you call for?”

  “Oh, right.” Not wanting to spoil the mood, she searched for a possible excuse. “No reason really. Michael’s at work and I just dropped Mom off at home. I was bored.”

  “You know you can call him at the station.”

  “I know. But . . . I’m afraid if I call him, he won’t be there and I’ll be terrified all over again.”

  Valerie let out a heavy sigh. “I get it. You need to remember, he’s good at his job. He’s been doing it for years and that was the first time he’d ever been hurt in the line of duty.”

  She felt better almost immediately. “You’re right. I need to let go a little.”

  “I’ll never stop being worried, but you could be hit by a bus tomorrow.”

  “Thanks,” Lena said, sarcasm dripping from the word.

  “No, seriously. Any one of us could die at any moment. Grace told me once that she chose to be proud of what John did for a living rather than be worried about him constantly.”

  The mention of John made rage bubble up inside Lena’s chest. “Yeah, well, aside from his job, there isn’t a lot she should be proud of when it comes to that man.”

  “God, I know. I still can’t believe it. But I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about being a firefighter’s wife. You can take her advice there. It’s the only thing that’s going to get me through the nights Donovan is on duty.”

  Lena sighed. “How did I get such a smart best friend?”

  “Blind luck.”

  Chapter 31

  The house smelled like cinnamon when Michael walked through the door, tired and ready for a few hours of sleep. At the sound of the mixer kicking on, he fought a wave of unease.

  Peeking his head around the corner, he caught sight of Lena, a frown creasing her brow as she poured powdered sugar into the mixing bowl. “Baby? Everything okay?”

  Her dark eyes found his as the sugar dust flew out of the bowl in a cloud of sweetness. She didn’t speak, just nodded and dropped her gaze back to the mixture.

  Crossing the room, he switched off the machine and slid his free hand across the small of her back. “It smells amazing in here.”

  “Cinnamon rolls.” Her voice was tight as she leaned back into him.

  “Come on, I know you well enough to see when something’s wrong.”

  “I just needed a distraction.”

  Wrapping her in his arms, he dropped a kiss to the nape of her neck. “From?”

  A sob shook her body, sending panic through him. Turning her around, he took her face in his hands and forced her to look at him. “What’s going on?”

  “I don’t know, it just . . . it all hit me today. I heard the sirens and you were on shift. I panicked.” The words rushed from her in a torrent as she continued. “Then Mom told me my dad isn’t my dad, and Valerie and Donovan are getting married in January, and—”

  “Whoa, hold on. What about your dad?”

  Shaking her head, she pulled him close. “I don’t want to talk about it now. Can you just . . . make me forget?”

  He couldn’t deny her, not with the desperation in her voice. “Anything you want, baby.”

  His skin heated as she untucked his shirt and trailed her fingers along the sensitive skin at his waist. And when she whispered, “Kiss me,” in his ear, he fought off the desire to take her right there on the floor. She needed gentle and tender. She needed him to love her.

  “Come on, if I’m going to make you forget, I want to do it in our bed.”

  With a slight nod, she let him lead her down the hall. He could sense the aching need in her as they walked. She’d been so strong after his accident, so put together. Without her, he didn’t know how he would’ve gotten through it all. But now it was her turn to fall apart, and that meant he would be there to help her put herself back together.

  Slowly, he pulled at her light sweater, baring her toned stomach and tucked-in waist. When she made a move to help him, he backed away. “Oh, no you don’t. I’m finally back to my normal self, and I want to worship you.”

  Dropping to his knees, he kissed the skin of her belly as his hands popped the button on her jeans. She sucked in a sharp breath as his fingers ran along her waistband and pushed the fabric down until it pooled at her feet. The sight of the thin lace of her panties had him straining against his pants. His fingers ran up her inner thigh before tracing the band of fabric covering her. Slipping his hand under the scrap of lace, he pushed one finger deep inside her, causing her to cry out when he added a second. He moved back and forth inside her, feeling her knees shake against his shoulders. When her
breathing grew erratic, he cast a glance up her body and a rush of arousal hit him like a lightning bolt at the look on her face. Her head was thrown back, eyes closed, lips parted. It was the most erotic thing he’d ever seen.

  Before she found her release, he slid his fingers from her body and pulled her panties down her hips.

  “Jesus, Michael. Don’t tease me,” she let out on a breathy sigh.

  Standing, he unbuttoned his uniform shirt and slid it off his shoulders while she removed her sweater. Her breasts swung free, nipples hardened with arousal, sending a wave of need crashing over him. “God, I love it when you don’t wear a bra.”

  Unable to wait any longer, he unbuckled his belt and stepped out of his pants. His erection pressed against the fabric of his boxer briefs, begging for attention. As she stared down at him with hunger burning in her eyes, he knew there would never be anyone else for him.

  “I love you, Lena. So much.”

  She leaned into him, pulling him free of his boxers, and stroked his aching length. “Then show me.”

  With a feral growl, he pushed her onto the bed, his lust overtaking his desire to be gentle. Spreading her legs, he filled her in one solid thrust as she moaned under him. Her breaths came in sharp gasps each time he withdrew.

  “I need to slow down. I won’t last like this if you keep making those noises,” he murmured as he moved inside her again.

  Arching her back, she tightened her legs around his waist and took his face in her hands. “Don’t you dare stop.”

  He groaned as she took his earlobe between her teeth, the sound of her soft whimpers against his ear ratcheting his desire. The ache built inside him with each thrust and the moment he felt her body reach its crest, he followed, vision blurring with the overwhelming sensations racing through him.

  They must have dozed off, because he woke to the smell of smoke and the sound of the fire alarm broke through the haze of sleep. Adrenaline coursed through his veins as he sat up and tugged on his pants.