The Perfect Emotion (Book Two of The Perfect Series)

by Rolka, Melissa

  The guy who licked me yells over to me, “baby, I could love you if you give me a shot.” Then he starts to lose his balance as he checks out another group of girls passing by. I just laugh and grab onto Maggie.

  “Let’s go dance!” I exclaim and the girls all follow Maggie and I onto the dance floor, as well as a couple of the guys.

  “I thought you’d never ask,” Maggie slurs.

  The night goes on for a while with shots every so often and dancing. Another guy hits on me by grinding into my backside and asking if we can go talk at the bar. I dance myself away and over to Kelly, but Maggie just shakes her head with two fingers wagging at me. Soon the room is spinning and I feel like I might be sick.

  Kelly and I make it off the dance floor and to the bathroom. Once I get in the stall the smell that permeates causes me to start heaving. “Oh God, Kel, I think I’m going to puke.”

  “Shit, seriously?” She calls through the stall door.

  “Yeah, I want to go now. I drank too much.” I open the door unable to focus on anything. The mirrors only add to the spinning.

  “I’m going to get Maggie and then we’ll get you out of here, okay?” Kelly says as she heads out.

  I pull out my phone and see a missed text from Reed.

  How r u? Reed

  Drunk. Katherine

  He doesn’t reply right away and I feel like I might throw up again. The puke starts to rise up and I hang myself over the sink, dropping my phone into my purse.

  “Shit, girlfriend,” Maggie’s loud shrill echoes down to me on the other end of the bathroom. “Did you puke? I forget you are such a light weight.”

  “No, I want to go though,” I slur out past the tears that are about to break through.

  “Do you want me to call Reed?” She asks as she scoops me in her arms leading me out of the bathroom.

  “No, no, I’m fine. I don’t want him to see me like this,” I murmur.

  “Kate, he’s seen you in worse shape.” Even through my spins I laugh at the true statement.

  Maggie, Kelly and I say goodbye to Quinn, Jenna and Lynn who are dancing with a group of guys. I’m propped up in between Maggie and Kelly as we make our way outside. Luckily, there is a taxi waiting outside. They scoot me in all the way to the other side and I press my face against the cold glass of the window welcoming the coolness it spreads across my face. My eyes flit open and closed and the lights of traffic spin in my vision. I hear the familiar music of Closer to You ringing from my purse, but I’m too afraid to move an inch or I’ll surely throw up. Maggie and Kelly sing Roar by Katy Perry even though it’s not the song on the taxi’s radio, nor do they know all the words. Again, I hear the beautiful words of Closer to You softly playing from my phone. Then I hear Maggie’s familiar phone ring tone going off.

  “She’s right here,” I hear her say through her giggling. “I knew you’d be calling me… she is, but we are taking her back… no we’re in a taxi already… okay, bye.”

  Maggie’s fingers gently pat my thigh and she talks louder than needed, “Your knight in shining armor insists on seeing you.”

  All I can do is shake my head up and down. My head spins and nausea over takes all my nerves. This is awful. I’ve never drunk this much before and now I know I never want to again. Just then the taxi pulls up to our dorm. I open my door without thinking and half fall out. Maggie and Kelly shriek in laughter at me, but I feel too miserable to really care. As I brace myself on the door two strong hands grip each of my shoulders turning me around.

  “Jesus,” Reed’s hot breath hits my neck and I smell his masculine pine scent instantly. Jealously hits me as I hope that Jessica didn’t get close enough to him to smell his familiar scent. “Mags, what the fuck, she’s a mess!” He growls out.

  “Settle down, cowboy!” Reed gives Maggie a distorted blurry look, but he sure doesn’t look pleased. “Sorry, I forgot that she’s a light weight!” Maggie says lightheartedly. “Don’t worry I’ll help take care of her.”

  “Mags, you look like you’ll be in the same position yourself any minute now,” Reed tells her as he scoops me up and cradles me in his arms like I’m the weight of a baby. Normally, I’d protest, but I don’t think I can walk if I try. My head rest into his chest and I wrap my arms up around his neck.

  “Well, whose fault is that? You’re the one who got us all that sangria!” Maggie twirls around us and laughs in between her words.

  Kelly’s taken her shoes off and is stalking through the lobby straight to the elevators already, “Oh yeah, thanks for that Re-eeeed,” she shouts over her shoulder.

  “I-I don’t want to get sick,” I mumble as I squirm in Reed’s arms bringing a hand to hold my stomach.

  “Shit, baby. We’re almost there.” Hearing the ping of the elevator opening and then it closing I press my eyes closed tightly not enjoying the rising motion. Maggie’s voice hangs in the background with her singing some random mix of music.

  As soon as we get into the room I head straight to the bathroom and for the first time in my life I understand what it means to pray to the porcelain god. I throw up until I’m heaving uncontrollably. Reed stays next to me the whole time holding my hair, washing up my face and rubbing my back. Hours must go by and eventually everything feels empty in me. Reed’s long legs stretch across the floor with him leaning against the side of the bathtub and I lay my head on his lap. His fingers gently stroke my hair lulling me into a calm state.

  “Did I win?” He whispers.

  “No, you didn’t.”

  “I don’t believe you. How many guys hit on you?” He challenges playfully.

  “Only two, then I got sick.” My voice is raspy and drawn out, but the thought of even drinking water scares me.

  “How?” My eyes slowly roll up to look at him not sure if he really wants to know.

  “One licked my hand when my shot spilled on it and Maggie said that counted. The other tried to dance with me from behind and then asked me to go talk.”

  His thighs tighten as he tenses them and I hear him click his tongue. “Well, it’s good I wasn’t there.”

  “I walked away both times,” I say honestly, feeling too weak to look into his eyes again.

  “I know you did, beautiful, but I still don’t like it.” He pulls me up closer to his chest and holds me to him. “I should be the only one to lick you… bastard.”

  “Mmmm, hmmm,” I murmur into him. Weakly I lay my head on him. “What about Jessica? Did she lick you?”

  “No, not a chance of that happening.” He states firmly and I take an easier breath. “Come on, let’s get you into bed.”

  “Wait, I want to brush my teeth.” Reed brings us both to standing position. He puts toothpaste on my toothbrush and then stands behind me sliding the brush into my mouth while I grip both sides of the sink weakly. Slow and gentle the bristles glide over and around my teeth. It’s not as good of a brushing as when I do it, but I’m grateful.

  Minutes after we climb into bed I fall into a deep and heavy sleep. No dreams haunt me tonight with the alcohol still swimming in my veins. Morning sun creaks in the room and I briefly open my eyes taking in Reed’s vibrant blues staring at me.

  “Sorry,” I say quietly.

  “You okay?”

  “Yeah, I think so.” He hugs me and places a sweet tender kiss on my forehead letting his lips linger there. “You owe me breakfast, but can you make me lunch instead.” A deep chuckle rises from his chest and he lets his hand wander down and pinch my ass.

  “Yes, but I think being licked should count as being hit on two times alone at least.”

  CHAPTER 29

  The remainder of the morning I spend sleeping off the haze and alcohol. Reed leaves at some point, but I still feel too weak to notice much. When I wake I see a folded piece of paper next to me with my full name scrolled across it and a quick note telling me to come to Reed’s for my winning lunch. After a long shower I leave Maggie passed out in her bed still to head over to Reed’s house. />
  Feeling assured I open the door and walk straight in. One of his roommates is passed out on the couch with a girl along side of him. They don’t even flinch when I shut the door. The sound of music floats softly from the back of the house. Making my way into the dining room I see two random candles lit and two place settings at the table. Tip toeing my way into the kitchen I watch Reed pulling out a pan of lasagna. My heart swells a bit more and I find it hard to enforce self-control at the sight of him. Granted, the Stouffers box that the pan of lasagna came out of is just to the side of the oven it is still endearing. When he pulls me to him his hot breath against my neck races my pulse like always, but we sit and have a romantic lunch in the midst of his house filled with his roommates coming and going.

  Once we clean up we lock ourselves in Reed’s room making out, fondling each other and Reed thrusting himself into me slow and then fast. Just as I start to see stars and my vision goes fuzzy he whispers in my ear, “I don’t want to ever be without you, Katherine.” I gasp as I come down from another high and twist my arms and legs around him so tightly knowing that I don’t want to be without him either.

  In between the lust we do manage to study and then we head down towards the city to meet my parents for dinner at my dad’s favorite German restaurant. The ease of being together in their company only confirms my feelings for Reed. He fits into our dynamic like a glove. Daniel even openly talks with him all the girls that call. I laugh out when Reed gives him some very PG rated tips on how to handle them. My dad talks to Reed about sports and law school in more depth. Then eventually, he asks about Kyle. A pit forms in my gut at the mention of Kyle’s name and Reed tightens his hand across my thigh. When I see his jaw twitch out of the corner of my eye I suck in a shaky breath.

  “Listen, Katherine, I still feel strongly that you need to file a restraining order,” my dad says firmly.

  “Dan, honey, let’s finish our dinner,” my mom’s smooth voice interrupts.

  “Dad, it’s fine, nothing else has happened now.” I look to Reed to get his support, but he’s looking at my dad for further information.

  “No it’s not fine. He’s… he’s been to the house, Katherine. He left a box for you.” My heart skips a beat and I nervously bite the bottom corner of my lip. “You need to protect yourself. I can’t do that for you. None of us can. This has gone on long enough now.”

  “But, but I’ve been fine up here. There’s been no contact.” I protest, but even I feel myself wavering in my stance.

  “I’ll take you to do it,” Reed says confidently.

  Straightening my pose and squaring my shoulders with agitation rolling through me I look to my dad and then Reed, but my mom’s eyes filled with sorrow pull me in. “I’ll decide and I can do it by myself,” I tell them all.

  The rest of the dinner proceeds with tension and awkward silence. I don’t let the tears that fill my eyes fall even though I feel like having a tantrum. I leave my parents feeling frustrated and angry, but not at them, more at the situation. Even Reed’s attempts to calm me fail. He drops me off at my dorm reluctantly. It’s a strange mix of feeling anxious and relaxed and comfortable in his presence. The lines of stress and tension etch his face, but he kisses me soft and tenderly. As we begin to part his lips brush my cheek and he says, “Hey, don’t push me away.”

  My eyes close delicately and I snicker because he’s right. “Okay, I’m sorry. I won’t do that. I just need to think… and figure this out in my head.”

  “Call me later then.” His thumb traces the outline of my lips and I pucker them into the pad of his thumb.

  Before I walk into my dorm I call his name and he turns around with a look of restraint. He bites down on the inside of his cheek as if holding himself back from me. Hoping to ease his worry I mouth, “olive juice.” He places his hand over his heart and winks at me before walking away.

  I cross through the lobby with a pressure building in my head. The elevator door opens and Brandon and the new girl he must be seeing come out.

  “Hey, Brandon,” I say as I step into it, but am stopped when Brandon lightly wraps his fingers around my upper arm.

  “Wait, Kate, I need to talk to you.” Surprised and shocked I step back out. Brandon tells the girl he’ll meet her at the front.

  “What’s up?” I ask curiously, afraid he’ll ask about Maggie.

  “I came by yesterday, but you guys were still out,” he stalls for a moment shifting his eyes. “Um, Kyle was up here yesterday. I saw him at a party on campus.”

  “Oh… shit. Really?” The pressure builds in my head a bit more and the words of my dad come haunting back about Kyle.

  “Listen, I don’t like the guy, but I didn’t want to get involved. He asked where you were and said he came to the dorm looking for you. I told him to fuck off and stay away. Honestly, I wouldn’t have minded punching him, but it looks like someone beat me to it. He didn’t look too good. Busted up, nose is messed up.” I can’t help wondering how bad the fight got with Reed. Optimistically, I thought that he would keep his distance for sure now. Even getting the shit beat out of him hasn’t stopped his persistence.

  My mouth has gone dry and the tightness in my chest has restricted me from getting in a deep breath. “Okay, thanks for telling me.” Running my fingers through my hair and tucking the loose strands behind me ears I step back inside the elevator. “Wait, Brandon… don’t tell anyone, any of the others, okay?”

  “You got it, later Kate,” he says and swaggers over to the blonde girl waiting for him at the doors.

  I cover my face with my hands and let a little scream out as I travel upward alone. It’s not an out right lie if I keep this from Reed, especially now that I know I need to do what I’ve been avoiding all along. It’s time to file the restraining order. I need to do it and I need to do it on my own for the right reasons. Kyle has pushed me long enough and I’ve tried to take the high road and give him the benefit of the doubt, but I’m done. This week I’ll head into the courthouse in the city and file.

  That night I sleep like a caged animal fighting the burn in me to hover over Kate and never let her out of my sight. I know her though and I know when I need to back off. She’s got to figure some of it out on her own. I’m relieved though when she calls me first thing in the morning. She hasn’t pushed me out or away. I don’t bring up the restraining order again even though I know it would benefit us in more than one way. I hate the feeling that Kyle could reach her unexpectedly at any moment. Even more so I hate that I might not be there. Watching her walk along side of me across campus carefree and happy only makes me want to see if there is away to file the restraining order on my own with my dad’s help. I know he can pull strings, but asking him to is another story. Being indebted to him anymore will only hold me back. Plus, I know how he feels about Kate already. This will only add fuel to his fire.

  I drop Kate off at her class and head over to mine on the other side of campus. My phone starts buzzing and I look down to see it’s my dad. Shit. Grudgingly, I answer, “Hi.”

  “Grant, it’s dad.” His stern and unenthusiastic tone racks through the phone.

  “I know.” I try to keep my resentment out of my tone.

  “You need to be here at seven on Wednesday.” I sigh, but I’m relieved that Kate will have her night class that evening.

  “Ok, I’ll be there,” I state dryly eager to end the conversation.

  “Jessica will be here too.”

  “Why? What does this have to do with her?”

  “Need I remind you, you got yourself into this predicament all by yourself. Weston will get you out of this, but what he wants from you is to deal with Jessica. That’s the trade off.”

  “Fine,” I grit out. “See you Wednesday.” I press end not bothering to wait for a goodbye. It usually doesn’t come anyway. The urge to toss my phone across the courtyard through the flowering trees doesn’t pass quick enough.

  Getting through classes the next few days is a struggle. Hiding m
y frustration from Kate is even tougher. My whole demeanor is rigid with the weight of Wednesday night sitting on my shoulders. I don’t tell Kate and that makes it worse. I hate hiding the fact that Jessica will be there from her, but its necessary. Necessity over takes anything else when it comes to keeping Kate from more hurt.

  That Wednesday evening comes like a wrecking ball, heavy and hard into my gut. Kate and I finish up some sandwiches at my place. She sits back and fidgets with her fingers licking her lips. Before she even speaks I know what she’s going to ask.

  “Will she be there… Jessica?” Her eyes stay focused on mine when she asks. It’s crazy the way I want to squeeze her to me because she’s lost some of her timid demeanor and instead she’s confident and bold. With the dread of my meeting in my gut it lightens as it hits me that she finally trusts me. Fuck. And now I’m going to try to avoid answering her. I can’t avoid her gaze, it’s roped me in tightly.

  “It’s just a meeting, Kate. I’ll text you, okay?” I say with hope to appease her curiosity. She runs her long fingers over my cheeks and through my disheveled hair. Ruffling my hair she places a sweet soft kiss on my nose.

  Once back at the dorm I can’t shake the feeling that Reed is hiding something. A pretty girl with brown wavy hair that I’ve never met is in bedded in my mind. Jessica. I remind myself that I know Reed, he’s mine in a way that no one else has experienced. Not even Jessica can claim that. Reed’s never given me a reason not to believe in him, myself or us. My ragged breath stirs in my chest before I release it. Breath in and out, in and out, in and out. My therapists words creep in… this is what it is trust in someone. You push doubt aside and trust in the relationship that you’ve helped create.

  “Hey, you okay?” Maggie breaks through my dwelling.

  “Oh, yeah, I’m fine.” I reply robotically, but as soon as I get a glimpse of her I know she knows me well enough.