How to Bake a New Beginning

by Lucy Knott

  Add the fruit to the sugar mixture and reduce heat. Let simmer for 5 minutes.

  Take fruit out of mix and allow to cool on wire rack, while you pre-heat oven to 180 degrees.

  Allow segments to dry in oven for 10 minutes, before letting them cool down.

  Once cool, melt chocolate and dip segments in, before placing back on wire rack and allowing them to set. (You may add sambuca to chocolate. Pretty sure that’s what Nanna added last time, even though she wouldn’t admit it.)

  ‘Wait for me,’ Sabrina shouted to her sisters, as they raced ahead of her. It was late in the afternoon. The sun had decided to play a game of hide-and-seek. It was doing a far better job at the hiding part and from eleven this morning had not bothered coming back out at all. Instead the brilliant blues and orange glow had been replaced by a miserable grey and a fine rain that wasn’t showing any signs of slowing down.

  ‘Come on, slow coach,’ Amanda shouted back.

  Sabrina tiptoed carefully so as to not slip on any black ice that might be lurking on the cobbles. Her sisters didn’t seem too fussed about the possibility of twisting an ankle and were merrily skipping ahead but Sabrina would not be so careless. She didn’t fancy a trip to A & E so close to Christmas. It had got icier as the day progressed, but the girls had been determined to visit some of their favourite spots. Though some would call them crazy, they had bundled up and were making their way down the mountain to the beach.

  ‘It’s so flippin’ cold,’ Sabrina said catching up with the others. The pebbles became easier to navigate as they landed on flatter ground.

  ‘It’s nice and fresh, good for clearing the brain,’ Amanda replied. ‘Who wants an ice cream?’ She wiped away the raindrops that got caught in her eyelashes with her sleeves.

  ‘You’ve got to be kidding me,’ Sabrina said, zipping her coat up a few more inches. Amanda laughed. Louisa continued up and down a few steps ahead.

  ‘Aw it’s closed now,’ Louisa called out to answer Amanda’s question in all seriousness, as they walked past the little ice-cream café that was hiding away in the corner of the moutainside. This was the place they used to run inside still dripping wet from the sea and order their gelato cones, before chasing each other back onto the cobbles, trying not to drop their ice creams from their sticky hands. ‘Italy shuts down this time of year.’

  ‘I know, I know,’ Amanda replied. ‘It’s so calm at this time. I love it. And this cold weather wouldn’t stop me eating one of Tony’s gelato cones.’

  ‘Me neither,’ Louisa noted, peering in the window just in case there was a sign of movement and they could actually get their hands on one of Tony’s incredible hand-dipped cones. Sabrina watched as her sister’s eyes darted around the small café and then seemingly a tad deflated, she carried on walking ahead.

  They walked past the café and onto the pebbled beach. In the summertime this place would be packed, full of people paddling in the clear turquoise water, fishermen lined up along the edge of the stone barrier, canoes and brightly coloured boats everywhere you looked. Now, in the middle of the frosty December, it was deserted.

  The girls made themselves comfy, pulling out their lemon-print blankets from the rucksack they had brought with them. Sabrina helped Amanda with pouring out cups of pastina from the flask she had prepared, just like Grandpa would have done on their fishing trips. She handed one to Louisa and held the other two tight, allowing Amanda to put away the flask and get situated, before passing a cup to her.

  ‘Ooh thank you for making this, Amanda,’ Louisa said, in appreciation. She wrapped her hands around the cup to warm them.

  They sat in silence for a while just watching the waves crash against the rocks. Every now and again a bird would swoop low, testing the water for any signs of fish. The rain had slowed to more of a light dripping and occasionally a ray of sun would cast a shadow over their chosen spot.

  ‘Do you remember that time we caught that squid?’ Louisa piped up. It had been a beautiful summer’s day, many years back. Grandpa had taken them fishing right along the very pier they were currently looking out to. They had all been thrilled each time they caught a teeny tiny silver fish. They would jump up and down on the spot proudly waving their catch in Grandpa’s face.

  He had laughed, telling them to look out for the big fish as those would make for a more hearty supper. But the bucket had been close to the brim with the tiny fish when Grandpa called out for them to make room. He swung around his fishing line, letting go and dropping a squid the size of his hand on top of the bucket. The girls screamed as it wriggled and slipped down the side, the little fish not leaving any room for the squid to fit.

  ‘That was the scariest thing ever, all those tentacles. We didn’t know what to do with it.’ Sabrina grimaced. ‘It was so slimy, spilling out of that bucket.’

  ‘We just kept catching all those tiny fish. Not a big one in sight,’ Amanda added.

  ‘Grandpa would smile all the same. Whatever we caught he was always so proud.’ Louisa sighed. Sabrina could see that tears were threatening to cascade down her baby sister’s face.

  ‘Hey, it’s OK,’ she said, rubbing her sister’s arm. ‘He’s looking down on us. He’s still with us every day, remember? We will have to come back in the summer and see what we can catch.’

  ‘I’d like that,’ Louisa said softly, taking a big gulp of the comforting pastina.

  ‘See what kind of fishermen he raised, hey?’ Amanda added, rubbing Louisa’s shoulder.

  ‘That will be a sight to behold, the three of us trying to get the squids off the hooks once we catch them, without Grandpa.’ Sabrina shuddered. ‘I’ll let you do that bit, Lou.’ She shuffled on the cold rocks, her butt having started to go numb.

  ‘Ha, I’d give it a go. He always made it look so easy,’ Louisa replied, replicating Sabrina’s action and tucking her coat under her bum to avoid the chill of the rocks.

  ‘At least we will give him something entertaining to look down on. I’m sure it would have him rolling with laughter,’ Amanda said, before looking from Sabrina to Louisa and back again. ‘Now, are you two going to let me in on your little secret?’

  Sabrina was grateful to her big sister for changing the subject and had to laugh at the fact Amanda hadn’t forgotten their exchange from the other night when making cream caramels. Sabrina’s lips were sealed of course. It would be up to Louisa if she wanted to spill the beans. So she faked innocence.

  Louisa continued sipping on her pastina. Amanda glared at them both. ‘If you ever want homemade pizza again … your choice?’ Amanda shrugged, taking the last sip of her pastina and placing her cup down on a bunch of pebbles.

  ‘Oh all right.’ Louisa giggled, handing Amanda her finished cup. ‘Follow me.’ She jumped up and took off. Sabrina tried to help Amanda by grabbing the cups and carefully stuffing them in Amanda’s backpack as they both awkwardly ran after their little sister while trying their best not to drop everything.

  ‘Where are we going?’ Amanda shouted. She had to shout to be heard over the car horns as they reached the village. Sabrina noticed she was panting too, having both sprinted up the ramps and leapt two steps at a time to see which direction Louisa had gone.

  ‘I have an idea,’ Sabrina replied, shouting above the noisy car exhausts and gasping for air. She felt a touch wheezy at the sudden shift in gear. She hadn’t planned on a cardio session today. However, as she slowed down and the air returned to her lungs, she felt her heart expand with love as she watched Louisa skip ahead. That feeling combined with the look of confusion that had spread across Amanda’s face had her feeling buzzed on happiness. She knew that this feeling of pure joy was one that only time spent with your sisters and seeing them finding their way could evoke.

  As they reached a more crowded path, the air filled with the most heavenly vanilla fragrance. Sabrina watched as Amanda’s eyes grew wide. She could see the cogs ticking in her big sister’s head, the need to find out where the smell was coming from buildin
g inside her. Louisa turned to face them both. ‘OK, so please don’t embarrass me or say anything stupid,’ she said. Sabrina was pleased to see that with the last words spoken Louisa had given Amanda a pointed glare.

  ‘Why, where are we? And please tell me you are taking me to wherever that incredible smell is coming from?’ Amanda asked, her nose pointed sky high and sniffing the air. This was a common stance for Amanda whenever they were near food.

  ‘I met a boy,’ Louisa said. Sabrina let out a squeal of excitement that Louisa was allowing them to meet her handsome stranger.

  ‘You what?’ Amanda responded. ‘When did this happen?’ Sabrina noticed that Amanda was smiling. No doubt the sweet vanilla scent was clouding any need for big sister, little sister talks, which came as a relief. Sabrina didn’t want Louisa to overthink this situation or for anything to dim the light in her eyes. She wanted her to enjoy this moment and this feeling for as long as possible. If one of them could get this love thing right, Sabrina would be happy if it was Louisa. She wore her heart on her sleeve and deserved it.

  ‘Please don’t think I’m crazy, Amanda, but I only met him a day ago when I came out for a walk, and he’s just lovely,’ Louisa said, looking slightly anxious. Sabrina gave her an encouraging hug.

  ‘I don’t think you’re crazy, Lou, not at all. This is so exciting, are we meeting him? Is this why you brought us here? Oh my God, does he work in that place?’ Amanda replied, jumping on the spot and copying Sabrina in hugging their sister. Sabrina’s mouth fell open at Amanda’s new-found giddiness. Yes, the sugary aroma had worked some magic on their big sister.

  ‘Yes, yes he does,’ Louisa answered, her shoulders falling away from her ears, clearly relieved that her big sister was not about to get all overprotective on her and burst her bubble.

  ‘I say he’s a keeper. Whatever that is, it smells phenomenal,’ Amanda commented, licking her lips and hoisting her backpack up on to her back, like a schoolgirl ready for her first day.

  ‘Just wait till you see inside,’ Louisa said, her smile now reaching all the way to her ears, as she took both her sisters’ hands and led the way.

  Sabrina felt giddy with anticipation at the thought of meeting the man who had swept her baby sister off her feet and put the sparkle back in her eyes after the heartbreak of the last few days. There were two men working behind the counter. It didn’t take a genius to figure out which one was Luca. He was the one who couldn’t take his eyes off Louisa. The minute he noticed her walking into the shop, Sabrina witnessed a dazzling smile appear on his face as he immediately stopped what he was doing.

  ‘Is that him?’ Amanda whispered in Sabrina’s ear, as they walked behind Louisa. ‘Jesus, he is divine.’

  ‘I think so. He hasn’t taken his eyes off her and bloody hell, you can say that again,’ Sabrina whispered back. Well done, Louisa, she thought to herself.

  ***

  ‘Oh my gosh, I’m in love,’ Amanda said, through a mouthful of ricotta torte. Sabrina wasn’t sure if she was talking about Luca or the third pastry she was currently demolishing. Luca had stepped away from the counter to say hello to the girls. Sabrina adored the way in which he had hugged Louisa and given her a light kiss on the cheek. He had been charming and sweet and Louisa was clearly besotted. Now, it seemed, so was Amanda. He had certainly won her over when he sent them home with a box of cakes.

  ‘So, do you like him?’ Louisa asked, walking arm in arm with Sabrina. Amanda walked a step behind, cradling the cake box and licking her fingers.

  ‘Do we like him?’ Amanda said throwing her head back and shaking her head. ‘Do we like him?’ she repeated almost to herself this time, as though Louisa had just asked the most ridiculous question.

  ‘I think that’s a yes from the cake monster over there,’ Sabrina said with a chuckle and a roll of her eyes as she squeezed Louisa’s arm. ‘He’s a sweetheart, Lou. He seems to have a good head on his shoulders and – just like you – he seems to put family first and really care about them. You could tell that just through the way he spoke. He’s pretty wonderful,’ she finished, linking arms with Louisa and guiding her past the low grapevines and what remained of the shrivelled oranges still clinging on to their trees.

  ‘Uh, I’m so happy you like him. That’s such a relief,’ Louisa said, squeezing Sabrina back. ‘I’m not expecting much. We’re only here for a few more days but just to have someone ease the pain for those few days will be nice. He makes me laugh and I didn’t think laughing would be possible with Grandpa gone,’ Louisa continued and it made Sabrina’s heart ache. She rested her head against Louisa’s as they walked.

  ‘Seize those moments to laugh, Lou. Grandpa would want to be looking down on your smiling face every day. We will cope together as a family and if Luca gives you that sense of hope and happiness, you keep hold of him and enjoy him for however long you have, OK?’ Sabrina said, clutching on to her baby sister tightly. A strong feeling of protectiveness washed over her. She would do anything to look after Louisa and make sure she always kept her sense of wonder and positivity that beautiful things were just around the corner, even when faced with obstacles and struggles.

  ‘And, did either of you two notice that he looks like Giulio Berruti?’ Amanda shouted from the background, her head buried in the cake box. She was walking like a drunk, more interested in the contents of the box than her own wellbeing as she zigzagged on the crazy Italian streets.

  Sabrina and Louisa looked at each other and promptly doubled over with laughter.

  ***

  Evening rolled around once more. The sky was awash with a pearl-like grey, threatening flurries of snow with its chill. Amanda had finished preparing the evening meal and the table was set. Feeling slightly warm from the heat of the oven, she stepped outside for some fresh air. Though it was terribly cold out, Italy was exceptionally dazzling at night-time. You could see stars for miles in the silvery sky. They cast shadows down onto the water, making it sparkle as though it were a bath full of glitter.

  In the distance, lights shone from little windows as families sat down together to enjoy dinner. Your imagination could take you away, dreaming of the adventures you could have along the Amalfi Coast and the characters you would meet along the way.

  ‘How are you feeling, sweetheart?’ came Mum’s voice, as she strolled through the balcony, past the potted plants, to find Amanda sitting outside by the small fountain the girls had loved playing at when they were kids.

  ‘OK I guess, Mum. How are you?’

  ‘I’m holding up OK thank you, sweet pea.’ Mum paused as she looked around her. ‘I remember the day we decorated these rocks. Mum, your nanna, just let us make whatever pattern we fancied. She loved the colourful crystals so much I don’t think she would have minded if we had covered the whole house,’ Mum said, with a small laugh as she sat on the small ledge next to Amanda. She was referring to the tiles and bright sparkling gems that shone from in between the stones around the water fountain. The same fountain, still in all its glory, that was in all Mum’s old baby pictures and her childhood photos, and which the girls had been drawn to. It was a popular spot for all Mum’s cousins, aunts and uncles to be snapped.

  ‘I think you did a great job, quite the artist,’ Amanda replied. She wasn’t lying either. The gems almost looked like a rainbow as they curved around the tiles that depicted the Virgin Mary. It was rather beautiful and calming seeing them reflecting off the water as it splashed into the basin.

  ‘Have you heard anything from work?’ her mum asked. Amanda sighed. She had been distracted the past few days, with cooking alongside her aunties, Sabrina opening up about Levi, Louisa and her Italian stallion and the funeral preparations. Her aunties had been doing the majority of the preparations, as they didn’t want the girls or Mum and Nanna to have to talk flowers and gravesites. Amanda appreciated this greatly.

  The Amalfi Coast had magical powers that made her feel a world away from Jeff’s snide glares and the stress of running a manic kitchen
, but she wouldn’t be able to ignore the messages on her phone for too much longer. If it hadn’t been for the constant checking her phone because of the lack of messages from Dan, she would have happily remained distracted from work drama for a while longer.

  ‘I wasn’t going to say anything because it doesn’t matter now, and I really don’t want you to worry, Mum. So, please don’t worry. But things don’t seem good.’ Amanda didn’t want to go into too much detail, even if her mum promised. Amanda knew she would still worry and she couldn’t do that to her, not now. Jeff might have turned one of the UK’s finest food critics against her only four days after she had left, but it all seemed superficial and redundant in comparison to losing Grandpa.

  ‘Anthony seems eager for me to get back but I’m sure it’s nothing. He’s probably just getting sick of Jeff.’ She wasn’t about to tell her mum that Anthony had informed her that it was in her best interest to get back soon if she wanted to keep her job and her reputation intact.

  Apparently, everything had gone south when Jeff decided to cancel Amanda’s food order and reconstruct the dining menu. Food hadn’t arrived on time and Jeff had naturally placed the blame on Amanda, informing Anthony that she hadn’t done her job properly before she left. It just so happened that with hardly any food and a disaster of a menu, a renowned food critic had come in and received a less than stellar dining experience, which again, fell on Amanda’s shoulders.

  ‘It will be OK. I’m sorry for all the extra stress this has caused. You try not to worry about them – they will figure it out,’ Mum said gently, as she stroked Amanda’s hair.

  ‘Mum, please don’t apologize for us being here. We knew when the time came we would be coming here. I’m happy Grandpa is home. I wouldn’t want it any other way. And I’m not allowing Jeff to cause me stress; Grandpa would not have it. He would tell me to do what I have to do, no worries just follow your passion.’ Amanda gave her mum a flicker of a smile.