Instigations

by Kiki Archer

  A flurry of hand shot back up.

  Freya started to walk around the room. “Okay, Gracie, give me the L.”

  Gracie puffed up even further in her seat, thrilled that the new teacher already knew her name. “Lesbian Miss.”

  “Great! And David, give me the G.”

  “Gay Miss.”

  “Spot on! Who wants to try the B?” Freya craned her neck around the waving hands to the small boy sat at the back. John, what does the B stand for?”

  “Bisexual Miss.”

  “Yep, and the T?” Freya looked around the classroom. “Jessie?”

  “Trans Miss, like transsexual, transgender or transvestite Miss.”

  Elaine whispered to Kat, “How times have changed. Did you see there was not a single giggle.”

  Kat nodded, but then again, she had not been expecting one.

  Freya clapped her hands. “Fantastic guys! Well, LGBT history month takes place in February and it celebrates the lives and achievements of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans community. Miss Spicer will be leading a whole school event that focuses on celebrating diversity, and you will be looking at this topic in many of your other subjects over the next few weeks,” she paused, “but I wanted to start a couple of weeks early and give you guys a lesson on how LGBT people have contributed to our history.”

  A girl at the front tilted her head and spoke politely. “But why are we doing it in January Miss, if LGBT history month is in February?”

  Freya smiled. “Well unfortunately, I won’t be here in February. I’m only on a four week placement and I have to go back to university to carry on with my course.”

  Nearly everyone in the class moaned. They had enjoyed having the enthusiastic new teacher starting their lessons, or finishing them, or even just crouching down at their tables and helping them with their work. She was very kind and always seemed to be smiling. “Gutted Miss!” said the same girl, with a downturned mouth.

  Freya paused. Their general reaction of disappointment had warmed her, but she did not want to dwell. She needed to grab their attention, to get them excited. She addressed the whole class. “Well, let’s start in the modern day. As a starter activity can anyone think of a famous person who will be looked back on by people in the future as someone who has made a difference to our LGBT history?”

  The flurry of hands were back. “Lady Gaga,” said an enthusiastic girl in the middle of the room.

  “Okay, what has Lady Gaga done?”

  The same girl answered. “Well she has started the Born This Way Foundation and she wants everyone to be confident in their own skin and she encourages people to accept others for who they are.” The girl adjusted her bright pink glasses. “Her motto is to embrace difference and celebrate individuality.”

  “That’s wonderful. Hasn’t she got the most Twitter followers on the planet or something like that?” questioned Freya.

  “Over twenty eight million.” The girl was clearly a fan.

  “Well isn’t it wonderful that she is spreading such a fantastic message of support for people in the LGBT community.” She could feel the connection with the class and they were all clamouring to speak. “Has anyone got anymore?”

  A small boy near the front pushed his hand even higher. “Ellen DeGeneres.”

  “So, tell me what you know about Ellen then,” said Freya surprised.

  He rolled his eyes. “My mum watches her every afternoon just before tea time and she always gets up from the sofa and does that silly dancing thing that Ellen does when the show starts.” He paused, “Ellen is a much better dancer than my mum though!”

  Freya laughed. “I know what you mean about the dancing. But tell me why people in the next generation may regard her as a person in history who has made a difference to LGBT rights.”

  He scratched his head. “I think I heard my mum say she was one of the first famous women in Hollywood to be open about her sexuality, and I think she has given other people the courage to do the same.” He paused and clicked his fingers remembering the comment. “You can be gay and great at your job.”

  Elaine was scribbling away. She turned to Kat and whispered, “This is incredible. I really think some teachers fail to give kids enough credit. They are so aware and accepting of all of these issues nowadays, that soon this will be a complete non issue.”

  Kat smiled and whispered back, “I believe we are almost already there Elaine.”

  “Well we will be if we have great teachers like Freya who deal with this in such a fantastic way.”

  Kat kept to a whisper, “The LGBT history month looks set to be a great success. I ran a preparation session with the staff last week and I think they grasped the two main aims.”

  “What are you focusing on?”

  “One: that we have to be inclusive of diversity, and two: that we have to educate out prejudice.”

  Elaine shoved her pen into Kat’s hand. “Write that down for me! That’s great! I’ll use that in my lectures!”

  Kat smiled to herself, her beliefs once again confirmed. Times were changing and they were changing for the best. LGBT people were fast becoming a ‘regular’ part of lessons and the new wave of teachers and trainers were all singing from the same hymn sheet, to a tune of inclusion, diversity, tolerance and acceptance; and most of the older teachers were also joining in with heartfelt voices. She looked back up at Freya, who was glowing with confidence.

  She was scanning the classroom and smiling. “Fab, who else?”

  A girl from the back started talking. “Chaz Bono. Did you see him on Dancing With The Stars Miss?”

  Freya laughed. “I certainly did, and yes, he has made a difference. But tell me why.”

  The girl started to reel off the facts. “Chaz Bono is the son of that old singer Cher. My Dad loves her, but she is old enough to be his granny. Anyway, he was born into a girl’s body and a few years ago he put it all right again by having gender transition surgery. So now his body matches the person he really is. So I guess he is the first really famous person to be so open about it. That’s why he will be remembered.”

  Another boy piped up. “And there was that woman Nadia who won Big Brother. She was born in the wrong body too. People like that are role models for others going through the same thing.”

  Freya was nodding and questioning further and as Kat watched her animated expressions, she was filled with such pride. Freya had the class eating out of the palm of her hand.

  Freya leaned against the solid wooden teacher’s desk and lifted a stack of paperwork. “Now tell me, who has heard of Harvey Milk?”

  A tall boy’s hand shot up. “I saw the film Miss.”

  Freya exaggerated a puzzled expression. “Hmm, I’m sure that was a fifteen, but shh, I won’t tell anyone.”

  The tall boy smiled shyly. “It was a good film about the first openly gay man who got into politics.”

  “I’m impressed! So come on, how about Oscar Wilde?”

  There were a couple of nods.

  “Sappho?”

  The class shook their heads.

  Freya pointed at the objectives written clearly on the board. “Well it’s our aim to look back through the ages and familiarise ourselves with the people who have made a difference to LGBT history.”

  A little girl put her hand up.

  “Yes Molly?”

  “Then at the end can we say who we think has made the biggest difference?”

  Freya laughed. “You’re a mind reader Molly! That is exactly what I want you to do.”

  The little girl spoke quietly. “Can I tell you mine now?”

  Freya waved the pile of brightly coloured sheets with photos and jumbled biographies that the class had to match. “You might change your mind when you hear about all of these wonderful people.”

  The little girl smiled. “No I won’t. Mine is the most wonderful.”

  Freya laughed warmly. “Come on then Molly, who is it? Who do you think has made the biggest difference?”


  The little girl turned to the back of the classroom. “It’s Miss Spicer, of course.”

  ****

  Elaine waited for the final student to leave the classroom and watched as they got swallowed up by the steady stream of bodies flowing down the busy corridor. She called Freya to join them at the back. “You have a free period next don’t you?”

  Freya nodded, still slightly flushed from the exuberant throws of teaching.

  “Great! Well, not that it really matters because this is going to be short and succinct.”

  Freya pulled up a plastic chair and caught Kat’s smiling eye. “Okay.”

  Elaine wiggled her triangle shaped glasses and began. “You are clearly a natural teacher and that first observation must have been a blip.”

  Kat nodded, still worried that she had been to blame.

  Elaine continued. “The lesson has been engaging, informative and well structured and you, the teacher, have made an exceptional impact on learning.” She presented the evaluation sheet to Freya with a large tick in the Outstanding Lesson box.

  Freya re-read the main points. She had not realised how much this would mean until now. “Thank you.”

  Elaine waved her away dismissively. “Don’t thank me you dafty! Thank your mentor.”

  Kat smiled kindly. “This was all her.”

  Freya grinned and placed the piece of paper back on the table. “I think we all know that’s not true!”

  Elaine took both of their hands. “Well the bottom line is that you two are a great team. Ooo, could you imagine if you got a job here? Your department would be a force to be reckoned with!” She laughed loudly at Kat. “Not that I mean it’s not now! I have seen the county statistics and you are off the scale,” she squeezed their hands and sniggered, “but if you two were running the place, then who knows where you could take it,” she laughed again, getting carried away with herself, “the stratosphere I expect. You pair really would be great here!”

  Kat was unsure how long the hand holding would last, but for once she decided to just lose her inhibitions and go with it. “We sure would,” she smiled, holding Freya’s eyes.

  Elaine picked up on the moment and gave one final hand squeeze. “Right, got to dash. I am off to see Gaynor Newman next and good god that woman’s a bore! She teaches like it’s the Middle Ages!” She scraped her papers and pens with one swift swoop off the table and into her large open workbag, adjusted her triangle shaped glasses, and made a final leaving statement. “There should be a rule that teachers automatically fail to qualify if they insist on wearing ankle length floral skirts and high buttoned shirts that are sealed at the neck with a broche.”

  Freya laughed out loud. She had never seen Gaynor Newman in anything other than an ankle length floral skirt, high buttoned shirt and neck broche. “Good luck!” she shouted, as Elaine almost skipped out of the door.

  “I’ll need it,” came the echoed reply.

  Kat was bursting with pride. The lesson really had been sensational. She turned to Freya, “You were brillia-”

  “Knock, knock!” Renee miraculously appeared in the open doorway, looking incredibly chic. She seemed to have a never ending supply of funky work clothes and today’s offering was a fitted pinstripe trouser suit. Her long braided hair was tied up in a neat bun and no one could deny that she certainly looked the part. Kat looked away as she waltzed into the classroom. “I’ve just passed Elaine Springer. She did a thumbs up! How did you get on?”

  Freya pushed her chair back away from the table. “You’re not the only outstanding trainee in this school now biatch!”

  It was in times like these when Kat felt old. Since when had biatch been an acceptable form of address?

  Renee plopped herself on a spare table. “I knew you would, that’s why I got you...” she reached into her jacket pocket and withdrew a small pink card, “...this! Here you go sweetie.”

  Freya stood up and leaned forwards to give her a hug. “Ah! Thank you.” She opened it carefully and read the handwritten prose, pausing with a private smile. “Oh thanks Renee. That means a lot.”

  Kat coughed. “Sorry Renee, but we had not quite finished doing the debrief.”

  Freya spun back around. “We had, hadn’t we?”

  “Come on! She deserves the rest of this lesson off. She has just pulled it back from the brink of course dismissal!”

  Kat looked at the pair of them and admitted defeat. If there was somewhere else that Freya would rather be, then she would rather she went. “Fine, off you go then.”

  Freya looked thrilled. “Really?”

  “Yes Freya. It’s fine. I need to catch up with Diane anyway.”

  Renee wiggled her head. “Now that shows what a super mentor you are! Pulling her back from the brink!”

  Kat stood up and frowned at Renee. “You know what? I think it’s about time we had a little chat about the appropriate way in which you should speak to senior members of staff.”

  Renee burst out laughing and put her arm around Freya’s shoulder, pulling her in close. “Hey, you’re my best friend’s missus! Of course I’m going to tease you!”

  Kat watched in disbelief as the pair of them giggled off into the corridor. She didn’t know what to do. Was she being a stickler? Did she need to relax? Freya’s words shot back into her mind. ‘The timing’s not right ... I love you too.’ A wave of realisation came crashing down and she struggled to catch her breath. It had happened again. She had failed to see what was going on right in front of her nose. Why hadn’t she reacted yesterday? Why had she ignored the obvious? Why had she tried to believe? She already knew the answer. She had wanted the fairytale.

  She gently closed her classroom door and felt a numbness slowly cascade down her body. She walked into the store cupboard in the corner of the room and grabbed hold of a wooden shelf. A slow tear crept down her cheek and she bent her head into her arms. The old wooden door creaked closed and she stopped herself from pulling the frayed string light. The darkness was a comfort and the musty smell of shelves and worn text books served to calm her senses. She inhaled deeply and wanted to disappear. She lifted herself up with a long drawn breath and leaned back against a wooden pillar. As pain engulfed all of her senses she slid slowly down to the floor. She hugged her knees and bowed her head in the darkness. This was it, her dream was over.

  The classroom door hit the metal filing cabinet and clattered loudly, jolting her back into consciousness. She heard their giggled laughter and pulled herself into a tighter ball on the dusty floor. The voices were clear. The voices were unafraid. The voices didn’t care who might be listening.

  Renee spoke first. “She’s not here. Don’t you mind that she spends so much of her time with Pouty Pity?”

  Freya was clearly animated. “Do I get jealous? Of Miss Pity? No, of course not!”

  Renee was laughing. “No you’re right. It’s true what they say. A jealous girlfriend is a faithful girlfriend. If you don’t get jealous when someone has her attention, it’s because someone has yours.”

  Kat heard the sound of Freya hitting Renee’s shoulder. “Shhh! Will you be quiet!”

  It sounded like Renee was doing the running man. “And I got your attention baby!”

  Freya was laughing again. “Will you pack it in! I have never met anyone quite like you!”

  The sound of a chair being scraped across the floor sent shivers down Kat’s spine. Someone had just sat down.

  Renee was loud. “I know! I’m one of a kind. Tell me more. Tell me more! What have I got that others haven’t?”

  Kat put her hands over her ears, but the voices were too clear.

  Renee was probing. “What do you love the best?”

  Freya was giggling and Kat could picture Renee striking a pose. “I have to give you a point for sense of humour.”

  Renee was huffing and feigning outrage. “What about my kissing skills? You said I was the best person you had ever kissed.”

  Kat’s heart shattered completely and she g
asped out in pain.

  The chair scraped again. Renee must now be standing, edging closer to Freya no doubt.

  “Come on. Kiss me here. On her desk. You promised, remember?”

  Kat hugged herself tightly, aching from the hurt, feeling like she was sinking, deeper and deeper.

  Freya was still laughing. “I’m not kissing you on her desk!”

  Renee was getting closer. “Okay, let’s go to the toilets again!”

  “No!” The laughed response wasn’t convincing.

  “Come on, you know you love it in the toilets. We could christen the ones next to Block A.”

  Freya had paused. “Hang on a minute.”

  “What are you afraid of? You seem pretty adventurous to me! Wink, wink, nudge nudge!”

  Freya’s volume was raised. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Listen up Missy!”

  “I love it when you talk dirty!”

  “Seriously now. Listen to me. I’m not kissing you in the toilets again-”

  Kat was shaking with tears.

  “You know you want to.”

  Freya’s tone changed completely. “I’m not kissing you in the toilets again, because I have never kissed you in the toilets! You tried to snog me once in the toilets when I was drunk beyond belief and I can’t believe you are still going on about it now!”

  “Alright! Alright!”

  Freya was getting louder. “No, it’s not alright. I’m going to say this once more. You started this, and now I’m asking you to stop it. You need to pack it in right away!”

  “Alright!”

  “Seriously. You shouldn’t have done it in the first place and you should not have turned it into this joke, which is quite frankly really starting to bore me.”

  “Kat’s not around.”

  “I don’t care if she’s around or not. I want you to stop it.” She paused. “And anyway, Kat knows everything.”

  Renee quietened her tone. “She knows?”

  “Of course she does! She’s my girlfriend and I love her and I don’t keep anything from her.”

  “What, even the toilets?”