Face to Face (On Pointe Book 3)

by Penelope Freed

  Maybe I need more practice.

  The last ten minutes of class Mr. Bethelo has three different couples demonstrate the combination we’ve been working on to the class. I’m relieved when he doesn’t pick me and Noah. When he asks Lisa and her partner to demonstrate, I can’t help bouncing on my toes and clapping silently for my friend. They’re an excellent team, already doing a beautiful job, I can tell she trusts her partner more than I trust Noah. I’m glad at least one of us is doing well in this class.

  Following Lisa out the door to head to our contemporary class, we both pull out our phones to check for messages. Lisa’s grin tells me that she’s got messages from Hunter to match mine from Trevor.

  Trevor: So apparently Thurs nights are movie nights in our dorm? We’ve all been told to pick up our dinner and bring it up to our floor for whatever it is they have planned. Bummed I won’t get to see you tonight.

  We discovered on Sunday night that Trevor’s running camp is the one sharing our dorm building. He’s joined us for dinner every night this week, and he and I managed to have lunch together a couple of times. Breakfast is not an option since they start their day at six in the morning, and me and my bed have a standing date at that hour. Unfortunately, both of our programs have a nine thirty curfew during the week, so we haven’t been able to do much more than dinner and hanging out in the lobby afterward. Gloria and the gang are always around, so I still haven’t figured out how to spend time alone with Trevor. I was hoping he might have some ideas.

  Me: It’s fine, you have fun. I’ll have a girl’s night with Lisa. Are we still on for this weekend?

  Of course, Trevor’s reply is almost instant.

  Trevor: Absolutely, wouldn’t miss seeing my girl for the world. I have our tickets already. Tell everyone to wear closed-toe shoes, there’s a lot of dust and rocks and stuff. Also, I don’t want to see those ballet feet.

  Trevor: That sounded better in my head. You know what I mean.

  Me: Yes, I know what you mean. Gotta go, class in a few.

  Trevor: Dance good!

  That’s the goal.

  “Lisa is totally teacher’s pet in pas de deux,” I tell Katy as we walk down the sidewalk. The gang is up ahead of us, leading the way to the train station, Trevor’s hand is holding mine while Lisa keeps pace next to me, holding up her phone so I can see Katy’s face on her screen.

  “I am not!” Lisa pulls the phone away from me, but I grab her arm, pulling it back so I can see Katy’s face, Hunter lurking over her shoulder. “She totally is. She got partnered with one of the guys from Eight and he happens to be from Japan. So when she started explaining things to him in Japanese, the other girls in our class who are also from Japan heard her and got her to explain it to them too. So now she’s become the official translator for our class and all the teacher’s love her for it.”

  It’s faint, but a tinge of pink is creeping up Lisa’s cheek at my words. “It’s not a big deal, and it doesn’t make me teacher’s pet. I’m just helping. They were all struggling to follow, you would do the same if you spoke Japanese.”

  “That’s my girl,” Hunter’s voice booms from behind Katy before she elbows him out of the screen.

  “Anyway.” I grab the phone from Lisa. “Lisa is kicking butt in pas de deux while I am sucking hardcore at it. But it’s okay, I’ll just have to practice more.”

  Katy grins. “Is Trevor there? Maybe you should practice with him?” Trevor’s laugh answers Katy’s question as my cheeks go up in flames.

  “I’m here,” he answers for himself. “If the guys will show me what to do, I’d be happy to help Hannah ‘practice.’”

  Yes, he makes air quotes with his fingers and all, swinging our joined hands up to do it. Katy’s squeal of delight at the sight has me glad that the phone is in front of me and not next to my ear.

  Lisa plucks her phone out of my hand and hurries away, I’m guessing to talk to Hunter. Trevor is smiling down at me, his grin crinkling his eyes a smidge. His hair is tucked inside a baseball cap today, the way his curls stick out from underneath it is adorable. He was so proud of me when I recognized the abstract spider shape on his t-shirt as a Spiderman logo. I was smart enough to throw a cardigan over my jean shorts and plain green t-shirt, hopefully I won’t freeze tonight in the chilly air off the sound.

  “You’re struggling with pas de deux, huh? Do you really think I could help? You know I will if you want me to try.” Letting go of my hand, Trevor slides his arm around my waist, tucking me into his side. I slide my own arm behind his back to grip his waist, his lean torso warm under my palm.

  Shrugging, I struggle to find the words to explain why I’m having such a hard time. “It’s just…I get anxious about it and then it’s hard to think while I’m dancing. I gave Noah a bloody nose—how do I come back from that?”

  Suddenly, Noah is walking next to me. “Dude, Hannah, it’s not a big deal. It’s not the first time it’s happened. Last year, Gloria kicked Uri in the face and gave him a fat lip that lasted for a week.”

  Gloria adds to it by piping up. “I punished myself since he couldn’t make out with me for days afterwards. Learned my lesson!” To emphasize her point, she pulls Uri’s face down and kisses him thoroughly. They don’t go in for much PDA, at least not on campus, but seeing her kiss him sends a strange, swooping heat through me.

  “See, T, it’s fine. But I’ll still help you practice if you want.” Trevor emphasizes his words with a squeeze of his fingers against my waist. The fabric of my shirt slides up enough that his fingers brush against my bare skin and a giddy nervousness washes over me. For a moment I wonder what it would be like to have his whole hand resting against my skin. What it would feel like to touch his.

  A confusing tangle of excitement, nervousness, and warmth settles in my gut, worse than any stage fright I’ve ever experienced. If I was backstage, I would close my eyes and picture the scene, tell myself the story I was about to dance, but I can’t do that here. Besides, the visions in my head are closer to a jumble of sensation than an actual story. The comfort of Trevor wrapping his arms around me, holding me tight. A flutter of anxiety that I have no idea what I’m doing. Streaks of triumph and nervousness when Andrew Park’s hand caressed my skin at Katy’s house that day at the pool. While Andrew Park touching me made me more and more uncomfortable each time he did it, until I forcefully distanced myself, right now, I’m imagining those same touches from Trevor and it’s anything but unwelcome.

  “Hannah?” Trevor’s question pulls me from my thoughts. Looking up into his face, it’s all I can do to smile back at him, hoping that the happiness in my eyes is enough to dispel the doubt I see in his.

  “Yeah. Practice would be great. Maybe not the pirouettes though, I don’t want to give you a bloody nose like Noah.” Trevor’s grin sends flutters through me.

  “Hey Noah!” Trevor calls over everyone’s heads. “Think you can show me how to help my girl?”

  “Yeah, I can show you a thing or two. I’ll do anything to make sure I keep all my teeth in place.”

  “We can help too!” Uri calls from the front of the pack.

  The rest of the walk to the train station and the train ride are filled with ribbing and laughing from everyone on how they’re going to teach Trevor some basic pas de deux and some good-natured advice for me from Gloria and Elena. Trevor takes it all in good fun, laughing with them, his arm slung over my shoulder.

  During the entire fascinating Underground City tour, Trevor and I find little ways to touch each other. Holding hands, Trevor guiding me through the narrow spaces with a hand on the small of my back, leaning close to whisper in each other’s ears. All of it has me wound tighter than a tutu. It isn’t helped by Thomas and Noah sneaking up to scare us girls every time we stop to explore one of the cavernous rooms that hang out under the city of Seattle. Lisa and Elena stick together after the guys attempt to scare them on
e too many times.

  “Dude, come here,” Noah calls Trevor over as we near the end of the tour. I wander over to the other girls rather than stand awkwardly alone in the room we’re exploring.

  “I don’t think so?” Lisa is saying as I approach. “What do you think, Hannah?” She turns to ask me.

  “What do I think of what?”

  “I wanted to know if she was worried about her boyfriend getting jealous,” Elena explains.

  “Hunter? Of her being here? Or are we still talking about pas de deux?” My eyes are trained on Trevor, even as we’re on opposite sides of the room. I’m glad that the other guys have pulled him into the group. It would be easy for them to exclude him since he’s not a dancer, but I guess they don’t care. Trevor is pretty easy to like. “I don’t think Hunter would be jealous. He’s too smart for that.”

  “I don’t think smart has anything to do with it. We know that it doesn’t mean anything. I imagine it would be hard for a guy to trust that nothing is happening if he knew some other dude had his hands all over their girl,” Gloria pipes up from the other side of Elena. She’s so tiny I hadn’t seen her there. “I’m lucky that Uri was my partner, but, it can be hard when we’re not dancing together, because he knows what we got up to last year.” Gloria grins. “We did a lot of ‘extra’ practice.” She winks and we laugh, but worry creeps into my gut. Is Trevor going to get jealous? He seemed like he was okay with everything earlier, but is he just putting on an act in front of the other guys?

  Once again, my inexperience leaves me unsure of what I’m supposed to do. “I’m sure Hunter is fine. Katy will knock sense into him if he does anything stupid.” Lisa smiles at my words, the tiny worry lines in her forehead relaxing.

  By the time we emerge from the labyrinth hiding beneath the streets of Seattle, we’re all hungry. Heading to a nearby coffee shop, I find myself sandwiched between Noah and Trevor. With an empty expanse of sidewalk in front of us, Noah stops me with a touch to my arm. “Shall we?”

  “Now?” I glance nervously at Trevor. He nods his head, his Adam’s apple bobbing with a hard swallow.

  “No pirouettes though. How about tombe pas bourre, yada, yada, yada.” He demonstrates with his hands, so I know what he’s planning. With a last glance at Trevor to make sure he’s okay with this, I turn my back to Noah and he rests his hand against the small of my back. Pulling a deep breath into my lungs, I take off, stepping out with my right leg, then pulling my left leg into a little running step beneath me, Noah echoing the step behind me, his hand on my back telling me where he is. As I do a little preparation spring from one foot to the other Noah’s hands wrap around my waist and then I leap as high as I can, splitting my legs in the air. Noah lifts me easily, our joint momentum translating into lift as he propels me higher than I ever could have gone on my own, lifting me above his head. Defying gravity, he lowers me back to the ground, I shift my weight forward so he can set me down on one leg, the other lifted straight behind me as I hold the same position, one arm reaching forward, the other slightly back.

  Someone takes my back hand, tugging on it. Keeping in character, I step back on my lifted leg, spinning into whoever’s arms pulled on me, expecting to come face to face with Trevor. It’s not Trevor.

  I’m wrapped up in Thomas’ arms, chest to chest, staring at his mischievous grin. “Um.” I stumble backwards, my ankle giving an angry twinge, and bump into someone behind me. Strong hands grip my upper arms, stopping me from falling. “Sorry.” I whirl, pulling my arms against my chest, praying it’s Trevor who caught me and not someone else.

  Relief floods through me at the Spiderman shirt almost touching my nose. Trevor isn’t looking down at me, but glaring at Noah and Thomas. “Dude,” is all he says to them before looking down. “You okay?”

  “Yeah. Um. yes. I’m fine. I thought that was you.” I stammer, jerking my thumb over my shoulder at Thomas. “Are you okay?” I want to slide my arms around him but I don’t, unsure of what he’s thinking.

  “Yeah. Maybe I’ll help you practice later. Without the peanut gallery.” His voice doesn’t have the usual carefree sound to it that I’m used to. Is he angry at me? Pulling away, I nod and hurry to catch up to Lisa.

  Did I do something wrong?

  The worry that I’ve done something to hurt Trevor gnaws at me for the rest of the afternoon, especially since Trevor is keeping his hands firmly to himself. No little touches of my arm, no hand on my back guiding me through the crowd. Every moment that passes with Trevor being distant sits like a rock in my stomach, my heart racing and not in the fluttery excited way.

  We stop for coffee and the whole time, Trevor is distant, sitting beside me, but chatting with Uri and Gloria while I chat with Lisa and Elena. I can’t help eavesdropping on their conversation, Uri and Trevor comparing notes on his running camp versus the intensive. Uri sounds impressed by what Trevor has to do. I know I am.

  Lisa and I get Elena to tell us more about her, she’s been a bit of a mystery until now. Elena’s description of her hometown in Cuba is fascinating. I had no idea she moved to Havana from a much smaller town in the country to live at the ballet conservatory there when she was ten. I can’t imagine leaving home so young.

  Eventually, we head back to the train and ride it back to campus. Something changed in the group dynamic this afternoon leaving us split into two groups—Trevor, me, Lisa, and Elena sit together, while Noah and Thomas laugh and joke with each other. Gloria and Uri flit between the two groups, Uri is definitely the friendliest of the guys to Trevor, which I appreciate.

  Walking back to campus, Gloria and Thomas are deep in conversation, her whispered words sounding angrier than teasing. As we get to the glass doors of the dorms, Thomas taps me on the shoulder. “Hannah?”

  “What do you want?” Trevor growls, tugging me closer by the elbow. It’s the first time he’s touched me since our botched bit of pas de deux practice. I should be relieved, but it sends a wave of anxiety through me instead.

  Startled at his tone, I allow myself to be pulled away, but turn to face Thomas, curious what he wants. “Yeah?”

  “Sorry for startling you…earlier.” He jerks his thumb behind his shoulder. “I was just messing around.”

  I’m glad he’s apologizing to me and not to Trevor. I may be inexperienced, but I’m not naive enough to not have noticed the way Trevor’s been glaring at Thomas ever since the incident, but I’m the one he scared. “It’s okay. I thought you were Trevor, so you took me by surprise. No hard feelings.” I elbow Trevor in the stomach with my words, intending them as much for him as for Thomas. With the way the Six girls are gossiping about me, the last thing I need is for any more fuel for their venom.

  Thomas rubs a hand on the back of his neck. Is that the universal boy gesture for when they need to say something and aren’t sure how? “Gloria will kill me if I don’t,” he mutters to himself. “Um, yeah. It’s just that the rest of us were all a little jealous of Noah, that he gets to be your partner. Being your partner means a pretty good shot at being cast in a lead for the end of workshop performance. Just shootin’ my shot.” He shrugs.

  What is he talking about?

  Gloria interrupts, shoving her twin out of the way. “He was an ass, he’s sorry. To both of you,” she adds, eyeing Trevor. “What he was trying to say, was that all the guys were hoping to get to be your pas partner because that’s one of the ways they cast for the workshop performance, and level seven and eight are the only ones that get to do a pas. Since everyone is pretty sure they’re going to want to cast you, being your partner was a hot topic of conversation.”

  Knowing I was being talked about has my skin crawling. Now I have to worry about my friends talking about me too, not just the level six girls? I’m not sure how much more of this I can take.

  She glares at him again. “What he’s forgetting is that they wouldn’t have cast him anyway since he’s an E
ight with me. Ignore him. We’re gonna go. See you at breakfast.”

  With a wave, Gloria leads everyone except Lisa inside. Lisa hovers near me, looking like she has something on her mind. “What’s up Lisa?” I ask, no idea what she wants to say. I haven’t managed to make her mad too, have I? “Did you know about that?” I jerk my head at Gloria’s retreating back.

  “That they were talking about you? Yeah.” Lisa shrugs. “They weren’t saying anything bad, so I didn’t think you’d want to know.”

  “Can’t I hide in the back and wave a flower back and forth?” I whine, rubbing my arms, goosebumps prickling my skin as clouds start rolling in, blocking the sun.

  Lisa eyes me. “Is that really what you want?” Groaning, I shake my head. It’s not and we both know it. “Yeah, I didn’t think so.” She smirks, punching me in the arm.

  “Are you going to stay for a while? I was hoping to go call Hunter.” Her cheeks go pink. “And I, um, wondered how long you’d be gone?”

  Trevor regards me thoughtfully. Is that regret I see in his eyes? “I think we’ll hang out a while longer.” I don’t even notice when Lisa leaves, I’m so lost in the look in Trevor’s eyes. He’s pulling me away from the door, his warm hand finally twining with mine again. The second our fingers lock, the bands around my chest loosen and I can draw a full breath again. I follow Trevor around the corner of the building to a small courtyard, large concrete planters and patches of grass occupying the space between our dorm building and the empty one next door.

  Leaning against one of the planters, Trevor pulls me towards him, his hands on my hips guiding me to stand between his legs.

  Nervous and unsure of what to do with my hands, I fiddle with a stand of hair, not able to meet his eyes. I keep my gaze trained on the graphic on his t-shirt, tracing it over and over, anything to stop from seeing the look on his face. Is he upset with me? Jealous at the idea that apparently everyone wanted to be my pas de deux partner? Am I supposed to apologize?

  “Hannah?” I can’t help the way my shoulders droop when he uses my name. If he’s not using his nickname for me he must be mad, right? I can’t stop the tears that prick at my eyes. “Hey,” gently, he pulls the strand of hair from between my fingers, tucking it behind my ear before sliding his fingers along my jaw to pinch my chin. Tipping my face up, I blink and the tears I didn’t want to cry spill down my cheeks.