Chasing Shadows

by Rebbeca Stoddard

  “Screw you, Langdon. It doesn’t matter how you try to get me in your stupid car. I am not getting in.” I felt myself calling on the nature that was around me, pulling roots of trees toward his car. If I had to, I would trap him.

  “Goddamn it!” Langdon began to reach for the door handle, and I let loose.

  With the flick of my wrist, the tree roots that had stretched toward us broke through the concrete and began wrapping around the car, trapping Langdon inside, while heavier roots crushed the hood and trunk. The only way he could escape was if he had a chain saw or some of his little buddies came to his rescue. As I turned away, I could feel the pain of the trees so I released their grip on his car. I kept walking toward my home, never stopping to look back.

  As I stepped into my house, I knew it was a mistake to come home. My mom ran to me, worry all over her face. I told her everything and watched as relief, fear, confusion, and more worry crossed her features. She offered me a cup of hot chocolate to warm me up, and I graciously accepted. Even though I was finally over Langdon, his words hit a nerve. After all, I did love him, and I gave him everything, every piece of me. Then he decided a deal with the u da yv la dv was better. In a way, I understood. I was promised to someone else, someone stronger than he was, someone who would live forever, like me. So no matter what Langdon chose to do, he would still have lost me in the end. In a disturbed way, I felt truly sorry for him.

  “Hey, Mom?”

  “Yes, Auby?”

  “Is it wrong that I feel sorry for Langdon?” I asked her, curious for her opinion.

  “Well, I guess it depends,” she answered.

  “Depends on what?”

  “On whether that gives you a reason to forgive him for hurting you.”

  “He hurt me to protect himself. And I can understand it. I guess that’s why I feel sorry.” My voice got small as I explained why.

  “I’m sure that’s how it worked in his mind at first, then he changed into one of those . . . ” She searched for their name. “Whatever you want to call them. And that’s when he changed his mind about what he was going to do. AubrieAnna, I love you dearly, but you can’t feel sorry for everyone. It’s not your problem. If Langdon did what he did to protect himself, then he should’ve done it in a better way, a way that wasn’t so cruel. I know I wouldn’t be able to forgive him or feel bad for him. And I don’t. But I’m not you, Auby. You have a heart of gold—so compassionate and strong.” My mom smiled at me and sighed softly.

  “Thank you, Mom. I love you.”

  “I love you too, baby.” She kissed my forehead and sat the hot cocoa in front of me.

  As the hours passed, I was glad that I had skipped out on school and didn’t go back. My mom and I sat at the counter and talked about everything. She asked me about Sebastian and the nymphs, and I openly told her whatever she wanted know. I even told her that when Sebastian kissed me, my toes tingled and my skin cooled, all while butterflies went on a fluttering rampage in my belly. All she did was smile at me with a knowing look. We sat there for hours, laughing at stories of friends and family. At noon she left to go pick up some stuff for a turkey casserole, and I went upstairs to change.

  Since Sebastian was ignoring me, I figured we weren’t going to be training or having lessons, so I pulled on baggy sweats and a tank top. After I threw my hair up into a messy bun, I sat down on my chair and continued reading the book I’d checked out from the library. Creaking floorboards made me jump and drop my book. Sebastian was standing there with a look of frustration. Scared of getting yelled at, I smiled sheepishly at him, hoping he would soften his features a little. It didn’t work. Instead, he scowled at me. Very cautious of his mood, I stood up and walked toward him, wanting to be in his arms. As soon as I got within arm’s length, he yanked me to his chest.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice wasn’t harsh like I was expecting it to be.

  “I thought you were mad at me.” I felt so small and weak in his arms.

  “No, I am not mad at you. I’m just trying to find a way to get you out of school to start training more often.” Sebastian gave me a look of pure love that made my heart twist and turn in my chest.

  “Oh” was all I could manage to say. I felt so stupid that I thought he was mad at me.

  “Now let’s sit down and you can tell me what happened today.” He pulled me toward my bed and motioned for me to sit next to him.

  “Well, it basically started the minute I heard we had an assembly. I was mad that you hadn’t shown up on my first day back, so I went and hid in the library. Then the bell rang, and I forgot about that stupid spirit week assembly, so I left and . . . wait! How did you even know something happened?”

  He chuckled. “Getting off track, are we?”

  “I will finish telling you if you tell me how you knew,” I countered.

  “All right, I will bite. I knew because Fiora and Willow told me they never saw you after you disappeared into the library. So they thought something was up, and then I came to check on you. Now finish telling me.”

  “Fine, and um, thank you. For coming to me and letting me know you aren’t mad at me.” I smiled at him and finished telling him what had happened. Once I was done, I waited patiently to see what he would say, but his face gave him away. He was too angry to answer or respond. Sebastian clearly wanted to rip Langdon’s head from his shoulders and use it as a soccer ball. Well, maybe not do exactly that, but something along those lines. A small smile started breaking out on my face, and I knew he was curious when he lifted his eyebrows at me. “It’s cute. How mad you’re getting. I love it. Maybe it’s because no one has really felt that strongly about me before. I appreciate you and everything you do for me, Sebastian.” I kissed his cheek softly to emphasize how I felt.

  His eyes softened as he watched me. “You drive me nuts. I hope you know that.”

  I smiled at him.

  “Damn you. I swear to God, AubrieAnna, you are going to be the death of me. But it will be my honor if I ever have to take a bullet for you.” He kissed my forehead and squeezed me tightly.

  “I . . . can’t . . . breathe . . .” I choked out.

  “Right, sorry.” He let go but held onto my hand.

  “Sebastian, if you ever take a bullet for me, I will make damn sure you don’t die. I don’t care if I have to sell my soul. I will.”

  “I know.” We fell into silence as a deep understanding of our love settled in the air around us.

  We lounged around for a few hours before Sebastian decided to start talking about supernaturals again. I liked some of the lessons, but most of the time they were pretty uninteresting. Today he was talking about gnomes. He explained some ways to tell if someone was a gnome or not. Apparently they had warts on their fingers and toes, as well as green hairs, but the green was so light that it looked blonde. Their voices were generally nasally, and they hated close-toed shoes, which made it difficult for them since people always stared at their warts. Some were evolving, though, and their warts were turning to moles, very small and inconspicuous. Gnomes were extremely gross and so boring that I started tuning Sebastian out, until my mom called for us to come down for dinner. All too excited to be done with the lesson, I jumped from my bed and practically ran down the stairs. Sebastian followed dutifully and sat down with me at the table.

  “So, Sebastian, are you taking my daughter to homecoming?” My dad looked incredibly stern and protective as he asked his question.

  “Well, I haven’t asked her yet. But I was hoping to, sir,” Sebastian answered politely as we passed the casserole around the table.

  “Don’t brownnose me, kid. AubrieAnna’s last boyfriend did that same.” My dad paused then looked at Melly and Mickey and said, “Cover your ears. Shit, and he broke her heart. I am not dumb. I know my little girl likes you, but don’t even think about breaking her heart. I got lots of interesting ways to get rid of someone who does. And I ain’t scared to go to jail.”

  Sebastian’s eyes went a
little wide, and he actually seemed genuinely scared for his life when it came to my father. “I wouldn’t dream of it. I like her too, and with your permission I would like to take her to homecoming. I will gladly follow your rules to a T.”

  My dad seemed to like that answer and settled in his seat easier. As we all dug into dinner, the conversation seemed to shift from threatening Sebastian to talking about finding a dress for the dance. I felt weird about going to another dance at school. The last time I went to a dance was with Langdon, and I was miserable the whole time. I’m not one to do well in crowds. They make me extremely uncomfortable. While my mom went on about going on a road trip for the perfect dress, I looked at Sebastian, who was smiling pitifully at me. And that made me feel worse about the situation. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to go with Sebastian. If it was just us I would have been ecstatic, but the whole school was going to be there. And that included Langdon.

  After dinner Sebastian and I went back upstairs to my room. And as my dad requested, the door stayed wide open. I felt silly, like I was back in middle school. Yet no matter how much I pleaded with Sebastian, he insisted the door stay open. My thoughts went back to his face at the dinner table. He was actually scared of my father. A smile crept onto my lips. Feeling positively wicked, I walked over to him, looked straight into his eyes, and teasingly said, “You’re scared of my dad, aren’t you?”

  “AubrieAnna, I am a vampire with hundreds of years under my belt, and yes, I am terrified of him. Fathers have always and will always terrify me. When you were Amaryia, your father was a force to be reckoned with, and your father now is one as well. I will do everything in my power to stay on his good side.” Sebastian spoke with such seriousness that I laughed.

  “You have to be kidding, right?” I choked out between giggles of hysteria.

  “I am absolutely not kidding.” He shivered as if to prove his point.

  “Oh my Atlanta! You are really scared of him. I am in love with an immortal vampire who is actually scared of my human father.” I sighed softly and put my head on his shoulder.

  “It’s silly, isn’t it? That I am scared of human fathers?” He kissed the top of my head.

  “A little, but it’s okay. I would be scared to meet the woman who gave life to you.” A soft smile played on my lips.

  “She was quite the woman. Very strong, and wouldn’t take anything from anyone. It didn’t matter who you were, a peasant or the king. She believed that everyone was to be treated equally, with both respect and kindness. Many feared her, but many also hated her for how she commanded the ones around her, as well as the way she carried herself.” Sebastian had a soft, faraway look in his eyes.

  “You miss her.” It wasn’t a question. I could tell he did by the way his eyes lit up when he spoke of her.

  “I do. But I don’t remember her quite enough to miss her as much as you would miss your mom. It was a long time ago, and I lost her at a fairly young age. All I had was my father, until I met Amaryia. Then I lost her—I mean you—and I had no one. Clamora found me a year later, confused about what I was and why, and that’s when she told me the prophecy about you and how the gods always keep their promises.”

  “I’m so sorry, Sebastian. If you want, we can share my mom. I’m sure she would love to have you as a son.” Even though I knew he would decline this offer, I still wanted him to know that I cared about him enough to try to give him some form of a maternal figure.

  “Thank you for the offer, but I do not think your father would appreciate me being under the same roof as you without a marriage license.” He chuckled just a bit.

  “I suppose that’s true. But I wasn’t talking about letting her adopt you legally.”

  “Ah, I see what you mean.”

  Sharp growls and loud hisses from Helios made us both jump. He was sitting on the windowsill, staring at the ground. Careful to not frighten him or be seen by whatever was outside, we crept over to the window and peered down. As we approached, without looking I knew what was down there. My fingers tingled aggressively. There was no controlling it. Something told me there was more than just one u da yv la dv outside my house. No longer caring, I stood up and stared down at the ground.

  Five people stood scattered across the front yard. Hundreds of shadows flowed and danced around them. They were showing themselves and wanted me to be scared. But I wasn’t. The u da yv la dv were cowardly supernatural creatures that had no business taking over my home. Feeling brave and agitated, I opened the window and let my powers fly from my fingertips and slice a diagonal cut on each and every one of them, marking them. When the time came, they would be the first to go. How dare they even think they could threaten or intimidate me at my own home? All of the shadows screeched when my power reached them, and they scattered, terrified for their lives. Our war had officially started.

  Sebastian left shortly after the incident. Well, he made a show of leaving. He came back after he stashed his car somewhere so my parents wouldn’t see it. I chuckled softly when he climbed through my window. It felt too much like he was Edward and I was an already immortal Bella. We both knew he wasn’t staying to spend time with me, though; he was there to make sure no more u da yv la dv showed up. As I was about to hop into bed, someone knocked on my door. Without even having to tell Sebastian to hide, he went into the bathroom and sat in the bathtub. Checking that he was out of sight, I opened the door to see my dad standing there with an awkward look on his face.

  “May I come in?” he asked.

  “Yeah,” I answered, then turned to sit down on my bed.

  “I wanted to talk to you about Sebastian.” He sounded nervous, which worried me.

  “Oh, okay. What’s up?” I tried to make it seem like it wasn’t that big of a deal.

  “Well, I know that you aren’t . . . ” he choked a little bit like he wasn’t sure how to say whatever he wanted to say. “ . . . human anymore. I also know that you can take care of yourself now. But I am still your father. And I will be damned if I let someone hurt you ever again. However, I know that Sebastian loves you. I can see it in the way he looks at you. He will protect you as well as I ever could, maybe even better.” He smiled sadly at me before continuing. “I love you, Auby. You are my miracle daughter. You beat the odds that were stacked against you. You have always been a strong person and a beautiful soul. And although I will never tell him this until the day I feel he is ready to hear it, he is a good guy for you and I know that he will take care of you. So, I like him. But if for some reason he ever hurts you, I will come after him with whatever I need to in order to kill him.”

  I smiled. “Thanks, Daddy. I love you.”

  He reached over and hugged me hard. I gently squeezed back, not knowing how much strength I had yet. As he stood to leave, he kissed my forehead and said goodnight. The door gently closed behind my father and a smile formed on my lips as I thought about what he had said. Sebastian stepped out of my bathroom and I had to hold back a shriek. Somewhere during the conversation with my dad I had forgotten he was in there. Silently he slinked his arms around my waist and nuzzled my cheek. Feeling relaxed and happy, I leaned back into his chest and let him kiss me softly. When he pulled away, I felt cold and disappointed.

  “He’s right, you know,” Sebastian said as he sat at the foot of my bed.

  “Hm?” I asked, not really having paid attention to what he said.

  “Your dad. He’s right.”

  “Oh. Oh! I forgot you could hear that whole thing.” I felt a little embarrassed.

  “Yes, I did.”

  “What is he right about?”

  “How I will protect you and take care of you.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “That is not all, AubrieAnna.” His face turned serious.

  “Huh?”

  “I love you. I am in love with you.” Sebastian’s eyes smoldered with passion and honesty.

  “You have already told me you love me. I thought that you meant you were in love with me, not just l
oved me.” I felt sad and a little silly for thinking something that wasn’t what it was.

  “Well, there is a difference. I have always loved you. But this love is different than it was before. This time it consumes me. You are all I think and dream about. Even when you were Amaryia, my feelings were never as strong as they are right this minute. That is not to say that I didn’t love you then, because I did, just not as much as I do right now. Maybe the gods planned it this way. So they could ensure your safety, your success.” He stopped talking as if he realized he was a pawn in a game that was laced with tragedy.

  “Maybe you just weren’t meant to love Amaryia like you love me. It doesn’t always have to be some twisted plan of the gods, does it?” I wanted to believe it was nothing more than true feelings that were meant to happen at this moment instead of the past. I didn’t want to believe that it was the gods forcing a love like this so we could have a definite chance at winning this war. It didn’t feel right that gods could even think of something like that. But at the same time, human life wasn’t as important to them as it was once. People stopped believing, worshipping, sacrificing, and fearing the gods that had created the world around us. We were all pawns. Yet, they needed me. They needed us to win so they could still have something to care about, something to watch over. So maybe they weren’t as cruel as Sebastian thought they were.

  “Sebastian, maybe you are just thinking about it the wrong way. They aren’t as cruel as you seem to think. The gods need us, they need us to win so they have something to care about, something to protect and watch over as they have since the beginning. There is no way they would keep you here for all this time just so you could love me so much more than before, just to insure our success. Sure, some of that may be true, but they don’t want to take the chance of us finding out. I am sure they saw how this would play out. The fates know how this will end. They know how we will react. You have to think of that. I know that how I feel about you is real. And I know how you feel about me is real. So why question it? Why not just enjoy each other while we can?”