Love Hate Relationship (a Colors novel)

by Jessica Prince

  She bucked against me, meeting me thrust for thrust, never one to just sit idly and expect someone else to do all the work. Her fingers dug into my hair as she mashed her lips against mine in a breathless, panting kiss. Moving my hands up to her waist, I dug my fingers in, desperate to hold on to her as tight as I could as we were forced from our kiss to suck in some much needed air.

  “I’m close,” she groaned. I could feel her tightening around me as I licked and nipped at every inch of exposed flesh I could reach, tasting the thin sheen of sweat that had broken out against her skin. Had sex ever felt so goddamned good before? As Navie rode me, I couldn’t remember ever being with anyone else. Nothing from my past compared.

  Moving my lips to her ear, I said, “Want to feel it, baby. Want to feel you come all over me.” I bit down on the lobe and that was enough to send her over the edge, crying my name and a few other unintelligible words as her movements became uncoordinated. Navie’s walls clamped tight around me as I continued to pump my hips, dragging out her orgasm as long as possible while chasing my own at the same time.

  One, two, three more harsh thrusts and I came on a ragged groan, burying my face in her neck and biting down as I came so hard it was damn near painful. I lost all sense of time as spots clouded my vision. It could have been minutes or hours that passed as the sounds of heavy panting—hers and mine—filled the back of the limo. The smell of sex hung heavy in the air around us. That alone was almost enough to get me ready for round two.

  “Wow,” she gasped as she pulled my head from the crook of her shoulder by my hair. When I looked into those denim colored eyes, I couldn’t help but return the smile that was shining back at me. “So that’s what angry sex is like,” she giggled.

  That sound. That happy sound.

  Good Lord, there was no way in hell once would be enough.

  I needed her in a way that scared the living hell out of me.

  Nerves coursed through me as I trailed closely behind Rowan into his apartment. It was ridiculous, really. We’d just had sex in the back of a limo only minutes before, yet walking into his home, aware that we were about to spend the night together, caused hummingbirds to riot in my belly.

  Flipping on the lights as he walked, Rowan casually removed his jacket and tossed it onto the coatrack. I stood frozen in place just inside the foyer, watching in wonder as he pulled at his bowtie, leaving it dangling on either side of his neck before working the buttons of his sleeves and rolling them up to mid-forearm.

  I’d been so focused on watching his fingers work the cuffs I hadn’t realized he was watching me until his deep, rich voice, laced with humor, echoed through the space. “Planning on making a run for it?”

  “Huh?” Shaking my head to clear away the fog, I looked up and met his eyes.

  “You look like you’re about to run.”

  “I’m—” I started to protest, until I realized I was actually considering it. I wondered how things had suddenly become so awkward. People were supposed to clam up and get all weird before sex, not after. Well, at least based on what I’d learned from my limited experience.

  “You’re not running,” he spoke authoritatively as he walked back to me, hands firmly planted on his hips. My nerves began to diminish as my agitation rose. How the man still managed to piss me off right after giving me probably the best orgasm of my life was mind-boggling. I should have been in seventh heaven. But no, I was standing in the middle of Rowan’s tiled entryway, copying his stance with my hands on my hips, eyes narrowed in angry slits.

  “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me,” he answered, stepping closer.

  Reverting into moody-teenaged-girl mode, I responded, ever so eloquently, “You’re not the boss of me!”

  “Oh, the irony of that statement,” he laughed.

  “Are you trying to piss me off intentionally?”

  He stepped even closer. Close enough to reach out and twirl a loose strand of my hair around his finger. “As much as I delight in watching you get riled up, picking a fight with you would more than likely put a damper on what I have planned for the rest of the evening.”

  I wanted to get madder, I really did, but his words were a reminder of just how perfectly he worked my body over. Dampness flooded my core at the thought of having more than that.

  “But I will admit, watching you get so heated is better than the shy, nervous thing you had going on the moment we walked through the door. So the answer is, if it’ll get you back to normal and give me back that fiery girl I’ve been craving for so long, then yeah, I guess I am trying to piss you off intentionally… on a subconscious level, at least,” he finished with a smile.

  Give me back the fiery girl I’ve been craving for so long… Those were the only words playing back in my head as I lowered my arms and tossed my clutch onto the table by the door, taking in a deep breath to try and calm my rioting emotions. When I met his eyes once more, they were glittering with lust, darkened to a deeper blue than normal. He knew I’d just surrendered, that I wasn’t running. It was written all over him in the way his chest rose as he pulled in air, the way his pupils dilated, almost eclipsing the blue completely. But mostly, it was in the way he grabbed hold of me and pulled me into him just before melding our lips together in a hungry kiss.

  “Want you again,” he groaned as his hands roamed to the back of my thighs so he could lift me up. On instinct, I wrapped my legs around his waist, locking my ankles together behind his back. I wanted him again, too. “Wanted you the minute we finished. You’re in my fucking head.”

  I tried not to let his admission penetrate too deeply. I wouldn’t let this… thing between us mean more than it was supposed to. I couldn’t. It was just sex. Just hot, sweaty, blissful sex. It wasn’t anything more. Rowan wasn’t the type of guy to ever let it mean anything more. And if I didn’t want to have my heart trampled on, I needed to remember that.

  But it was so damn hard when he said things like that.

  “Kiss me,” I pleaded, wrapping my fingers in his hair to guide his lips back to mine. It was the only way I knew to make him stop talking, stop saying things I was discovering I was desperate to hear. I couldn’t imagine this ending well between us, but I was helpless to stop it.

  I heard a door slam and jerked my head up to see we were in his bedroom. He’d kicked the door shut behind us as soon as we cleared the threshold. It wasn’t until right then that I realized I’d never really paid much attention to what Rowan’s bedroom looked like. And from the feral expression on his face, that wasn’t going to change right then, either. From the brief glimpse I was able to get, it looked to be very much his style. Dark wood furniture, dark bedclothes, minimal decorations on his beige walls. But that was all I was able to take in before his lips on my skin distracted me from anything but the man I was currently wrapped around.

  “This dress…” he mumbled as he slid me down the front of his body, resting my feet on the carpeted floor. “This fucking dress.” It came out like a growl as his eyes trailed over every inch of me. “Jesus, you look beautiful in it, but I need it off you. Right now.”

  I couldn’t formulate a single word as he reached behind me and lowered the zipper of my gown before sliding the strap from my shoulder. I stood, frozen as it slid down my body and pooled on the floor at my feet, leaving me in nothing but a white, lacey thong since the design of the gown wouldn’t allow for a bra.

  “Good Lord,” he groaned, sounding almost pained. “Knew you’d be gorgeous. Fucking knew it.” As he spoke, I tried not to fidget, forcing myself to keep my hands at my sides when I wanted nothing more than to cover myself from his blatant stare. “But never knew you’d be perfect.”

  My whole body heated at Rowan’s confession, and suddenly, I was desperate to feel his hands on me, his skin against mine. I wanted every part of him touching every part of me. “You’re wearing too many clothes.”

  His eyes came back to mine, an impish grin tilting the corner of his mouth as his fingers went t
o the buttons of his shirt, moving purposefully. “You want me?”

  All I could do was nod as I licked at my dry lips.

  “Say it.”

  “I want you,” I answered, sounding hoarse as my mouth grew dry with every inch of solid, muscular skin he exposed.

  “On the bed.”

  I never broke our stare as I stepped out of my shoes and moved backwards to the bed. Once the back of my knees hit the mattress, I sat down and scooted to the very center, lying down against the mound of soft pillows.

  Rowan dropped his shirt to the floor and said, “God, you look amazing there,” as he worked the button and zipper of his slacks. Then, just like that, he was completely naked. I sucked in a sharp breath. I didn’t know where to look first. Perfection, pure unadulterated perfection; that was the only way I could describe Rowan in all his bare glory. I couldn’t memorize every dip and curve fast enough.

  “You have any idea how hard I get when you look at me like that?” he asked as his knees hit the bed.

  “Show me.” What the what? My response shocked me. But just like Rowan brought out my serious attitude, it also seemed he brought out a part of me I’d only kept relegated to my fantasies. I had no doubt I could be as adventurous as I wanted with him. And that he’d encourage every second of it.

  For just tonight, my brain whispered from out of nowhere. I had to bite my lip against the sting of that reminder. It was one night. Rowan didn’t do repeats.

  At least I can live out some of my fantasies for tonight. It’s better than nothing.

  It had to be, because it was all I was getting.

  “Hey.” His breath wisped against my cheek, and I was stunned to find he’d moved to hover right over me as I was sucked into a murky haze. “What’s that face about?”

  He sounded so sincere, so soft. The question in his eyes as he focused on me ripped at my chest.

  “Nothing,” I lied, my voice gravelly from the lump that had formed.

  Leaning closer, he trailed his nose along the side of mine. “You sure? You want me to stop?”

  Gah! I really needed him to quit being so sweet!

  I felt panicked at the thought of him stopping, at the idea of not having this one night. “No. Don’t stop. Please.”

  He pressed soft, gentle kisses on my lips, down my neck, between my breasts as he traveled down my body, each one breaking something inside of me until I feared I might cry. I expected hard. I expected fast. I expected more of what we had in the back of the limo. I never would have guessed Rowan Locklaine was capable of soft and sweet. And that newly exposed layer he just revealed shredded me.

  “Rowan, please,” I begged on a whimper. Please what? What was it I was asking for, exactly? I was so confused. I wanted him to stop, fearing I was moments away from a crushed heart, but another part of me was desperate for him to continue, wanting to take in as much as possible before it was all ripped away.

  I felt the rough pads of his fingers as he slipped them into the thin straps at my hips and pulled my panties off. “What do you need, baby?”

  “God, please... just… just hurry.”

  He was back over me once again, resting on his forearm while his other hand reached out and opened the drawer to his nightstand. “Not hurrying this time. This time, we’re doing it slow. I want to feel you wrapped around my cock. I want to savor what it feels like when you come around me.”

  My heart thundered in my chest as he ripped the condom open between his teeth, the heat of his body only leaving me long enough for him to slide it down his rock-hard length. Then he was back, pushing into me slowly, inch by torturous inch.

  My head tilted back into the pillows as my lids fell shut. A deep moan rose up from my chest as I gloried at the way he filled me so completely.

  “Look at me,” he commanded, one of his hands tangling in my hair as he pulled my face back to his. “Keep those eyes on me, baby. Don’t look away.” I gasped at what I saw when my eyelids slid open. I couldn’t understand what I was seeing in the depths of those crystal eyes as they stared back at me. It was something I’d never seen from him before.

  The sounds that he pushed from my throat as he pumped in and out of me filled the room, mingled with the sounds of his panting and skin slapping against skin.

  “So good,” he rasped. “So tight. Touch me, Navie. I want to feel your hands on me.”

  Incapable of denying him anything at that point, I slid my hands over his ribs, up his defined chest, running my fingers over every rise and indention I’d been craving to touch since the first time I saw him without a shirt. A tiny bead of sweat trailed from his temple down to the column of his throat, and I found myself leaning in to lick it off his warm skin. At the touch of my tongue, his chest rumbled against me with his deep growl.

  A gasp caught in my throat when he pulled out and thrust back in harder, faster. “Again,” I pleaded.

  “You like that?” he asked, offering me exactly what I asked for.

  “Yes.”

  Each hard pump of his hips pushed me closer. I was hanging from the precipice. “Close. So close. Need you harder.”

  “No, just like this,” he insisted, never once speeding up or slowing down, keeping an infuriatingly perfect pace as I hungered for more. “You’ll come just like that. With your eyes on me.”

  My insides coiled tight then snapped in a release that overtook my entire body. I writhed and moaned, chanting Rowan’s name over and over as he continued moving inside me, drawing out every single bit of my orgasm. Tears pricked the backs of my eyes at its intensity. I wasn’t sure how I managed, but somehow I kept my eyes open and on him the whole time.

  “Fuck,” he hissed as he began moving faster, chasing after his own bliss. I felt him swell inside me and clamped down around, squeezing him as hard as I could, wanting to push him over the edge just as he had me. “Shit… Navie!” he shouted as he buried himself as deep as he could possibly go. Each twitch of him as he came inside me sent electric shocks over my sensitive skin, throwing me headlong into another blinding orgasm. By the time we were finished, I couldn’t speak. I could barely breathe.

  I felt a feather light brush of his lips against mine as he pulled out and climbed from the bed to handle the condom, but before he even had a chance to return, my lids drooped with exhaustion and I was pulled into the darkness of sleep.

  I could have sworn it was just a dream when I felt Rowan climb back into the bed, pulling my back flush to his chest as he draped the covers over us. And I was positive it was a dream when I heard his raspy voice say, “Never felt anything so good in all my life, Navie. Not once.”

  Muted sunlight flowed through the drapes as my eyes opened and took in my unfamiliar surroundings. It took a few disorienting seconds to remember where I was and what had happened the night before. I tried to shift my body, causing a small ache between my thighs that brought back memories of Rowan waking me in the middle of the night with his mouth. My skin flushed red as I recalled the toe-curling orgasms I’d received with perfect clarity.

  Then it hit me like a sledgehammer.

  Our night was over.

  Turning my head on the pillow, I was surprised to see Rowan still asleep in the bed next to me. It was the sight of his relaxed, sleeping form that alerted me to the weight of his arm around my waist. He was holding me. Not only had we slept together, but it would appear that Rowan was a cuddler, as well. I couldn’t help but wonder if he’d held the other women the way he was holding me. At that thought, a sharp, intense pain radiated through my chest.

  I scolded myself. Suck it up, Navie. You have no one to blame but yourself.

  Pulling myself from my melancholy, I slid from underneath Rowan’s arm as carefully as I could, not wanting to wake him. If I was going to have to do the walk of shame, I wanted to do it without the humiliation of him putting me out on my ass like I’d seen him do the first day I came to work for him. No, I was going to leave of my own accord, not because he kicked me out. And I was going to
come back to work on Monday like nothing ever happened.

  Only I’ll be dying a little bit on the inside.

  Damn it!

  I’d just escaped from under the covers when the familiar sound of my muffled ringtone sounded from somewhere in the apartment. I chanced a quick glance at the alarm clock on Rowan’s nightstand and saw it was only a little after seven AM. That explained why he was still sawing logs. He was barely able to drag himself from bed at 8:15 like a normal human being. Deciding I had enough time to take the call without waking him, I snatched his white button-down shirt from the floor and slid it on, not wanting to deal with the hassle of my gown until I absolutely had to. Quickly fastening the three middle buttons, I shuffled on silent feet from the room, following the sound of my ringing phone to where my purse lay on the table I’d dropped it on the night before.

  The display lit up with a picture of Carson making a weird face at Willow, and I couldn’t help but laugh at the memory of taking it the last time I was home. That had been a great day.

  “Hey,” I answered with a smile, conscious to keep my voice down so as not to wake Rowan.

  “Hey there, little bit!”

  My nose burned and my eyes flooded with tears at the use of his heartwarming nickname for me. God, I missed him. I missed all of my family back in Texas.

  “A little early for you to be so chipper, don’t you think?” I teased.

  “I’ve been up since four. Cass’s got Restless Leg Syndrome, or whatever the hell the doc called it. Kicked the shit outta me all night long. Couldn’t sleep worth a damn.”

  “Aw.” I giggled as I made my way into the living room and folded onto the couch, knees to chest with my free arm wrapped around my legs. “Pregnancy giving her trouble?”

  “You’d think, but the woman’s tough as all hell.”

  “Don’t I know it. So, what warranted the early morning call?”

  “Well,” he started before trailing off, intentionally keeping me in suspense. The jerk.